I assume you are here because you are interested in a few writing tips. I am pleased to assist with that!

First and quickly, I would like to say that while I live by these tips, these tips may not be for everyone. I do want to clarify I am not a professional editor, proofreader, or agent, or worked in any publishing house or writing industry. However, over many years, I have worked with many professional editors and some agents as well. I have learned a lot about the points below. I am simply passing down that advice/info. 😊

I also want to point out that even though I've been writing for some time now, I, too, make PLENTY of these mistakes. Some of you were even kind enough to point out a few things in my books. Whether it was a problem with the plot or a misspelling. Thanks for that by the way lol.

As I stated - My advice may not be for everyone. It may not be advice you wholeheartedly agree with – and that's perfectly okay. Some of you asked for advice, and I just wanted to help.

So, with that, let's dive in 😊

1. TELLING VS SHOWING

I chose this one first because I sort of feel this is a big one and it's one that many have problems with, including myself at times. Personal opinion - this is one of the EASIEST ways in the history of writing to quickly tire your readers out. (A scary thought, isn't it?)

When writing your story, be SO VERY CAREFUL you aren't doing too much 'telling'. Instead of telling me what your character, Sarah, did this week, show me. Your chapter shouldn't be beginning to end with you 'telling' me about what she likes, who she's involved with, what her profession is, her fav hobbies, what she has planned throughout the weeks to come, and what kind of tea she drinks. Give your reader a chance to learn some of these things. Your readers will be grateful for this.

How, you ask? Just remember this.

Telling uses exposition, summary, and blunt description to convey the plot of a story/chapter.

Showing uses actions, dialogue, interior monologues, body language, characterization, setting, and other subtle writing tactics to pull readers into your story.

I decided to post small segments of my own chapter below - the section following this example are corrections from my editors and agents. The whole chapter isn't posted – just some ways how I changed a certain part from 'telling' to 'showing'.

In chapter 2 of my novel, CLAIMS ON A SOUL, Grace explains how her situation came to be. How Elena entered her and her father's life with ill intentions. In the segment below in italics, that whole chapter was 'telling' and I didn't realize it until editors pointed it out. Take a look at how I originally started chapter 2.

It started on the morning of May first, when I was ten.

Exactly one year after my mother's funeral.

The doorbell rang and my father answered the front door with his daily newspaper, cigar, and black coffee. Her long midnight hair lingered over half her face and across her beautiful light bronze complexion. Her dark burgundy lips were seductive enough to seduce Satan himself. Her perfect long heart-shaped face and her erotic, cryptic black eyes that could entice any man a mile away under her huge stylish red hat.

Her body – a body that gave off an alluring pull, trapping my father's eyes hostage with her black fitted thigh-high dress that curved seductively around her perfectly arched slim, but full-figured physique.

She had an electrifying erogenous pull to her. A dangerous and sexually vigorous energy that called to men wherever she went.

Spellbinding.

It was different from my mother's pull. My mother, whose even till today, is the most beautiful face I can truly retract from memory. Her long, auburn-honey hair, natural rosy lips, and dark ocean sapphire eyes. Her soft pale complexion and her cheekbones so classily shaped to perfection. Her timeless cream pearls she wore on every cocktail occasion and different unique bottles of antiqued perfume that over-took her dressing room leaving a refreshing saccharine powder scent on her.

Sophistication and elegance were her simplicity, and romance and art were her weakness.

My mother had a natural glow. A sweet kindness about her that made people crave to be around her, so I was told. "An addiction," my father always called her, smiling whenever he spoke of her. He said she named me Grace because that's what she thought the purpose of a woman was about. Having sophistication, self-respect, and grace in the heart.

He said she thought a woman couldn't live a full 'respectable' life without all three.

I was often said to have been a lot like her. I, too, had her long auburn hair, only my hair is darker and on the tawny side. It's slightly curlier and thicker as well. My skin, just like hers, gave a blush complexion. Except mine is more soft toffee, the same as my father's who was mainly French Canadian. My lips are just as dainty as hers, though. Except mine is plumper and plum-colored. And my cheekbones and face were just as oval, but with a slight form of roundness to them. But my eyes I inherited straight from my father. His eyes were of a light radiant copper texture. Peanut brown and slightly golden, like honey.

Well, as it would turn out like most men this eerie woman encountered, my father took to her 'pull' immediately that hot day when he opened our front door. Not to mention he also took to her story involving her broken-down BMW up the road she so desperately needed help with.

Six months later after that unexpected doorbell ring, she had my father's heart in the palm of her hand controlling it with seductive kisses and 'acts' throughout their marriage.

In the second segment below, I decided to shift it up. I added some dialogue and 'real-life moments'. That way, Grace is not 'telling' through a whole entire chapter of what's happened to her. She's 'showing' you. Take another look at how my editors and I re-wrote it.

"Ham or potatoes? What do you think, kid?" my father asked as he reached for his coffee.

Our doorbell had a distinct chime to it, always alerting us twice in a row—as if the person on the other side of the door was needing you extra urgently. It was an odd sound to hear so early on a Sunday morning. My dad, clad in his morning slippers, shuffled his way to the door with a cigar and black coffee in hand.

Probably somebody with another casserole.

Everyone had been so kind to us since losing Mom, but I remembered thinking, please, no more casseroles.

My dad opened the door and the vision that met us whisked the breath from my lips - it most definitely wasn't another casserole.

Her black-as-night hair lay in perfect contrast to the soft, milky complexion of her skin in a way I had never imagined on a real-life person. Perfect curves effortlessly filled the thigh-high dress she had chosen for the occasion and dark, mysterious eyes peeked from under the brim of a bright red, oversized hat with a perfect heart-shaped face to frame it all.

I was enchanted.

My gaze traveled from the strange, captivating woman to my dad, seeing that he was fully taken hostage by that face, that body, that dress, and without a single word having been spoken.

The woman emanated dangerous energy, as easy to detect as a strong, sensual cologne—a power that obviously called to men wherever she went. I could feel it from my seat at the table—an electrifying, erotic pull toward her.

"Excuse me, sir. I'm so terribly sorry to bother you this morning, but my BMW broke down just up the road and I was hoping you might be able to offer some much-needed assistance?"

She stood in the doorway of what had once been our family home, looking directly at my dad, offering not even a cursory glance in my direction. The suggestive confidence emanating from her felt almost calculated. She had locked eyes with my father and was not about to let go. My father searched quickly, desperately for somewhere to set his coffee mug, visibly flustered by this beautiful stranger in our doorway.

"Sure, uh, I can help you," my father replied, then called to me as he was already heading out the door, "Be right back, honey!"

Six months after that, they were married.

Did you notice the new dialogue input? Or how I made the reader a part of the moment? Did you notice how I digressed off-topic about her mother in the first segment? (That's a no no.) That is what's called an info dump. I was making one point and took my reader away from the story, talking about something else. This is discussed in point #8.

Hope this helped :)

2. FLOWERY WRITING / WORDY WRITING

What is an example of flowery language?

Here's an example: "Lips cracked, mouth festered with sores; each gulp of the dense air tormented the persistent itch carved into his throat."

Flowery language occurs when elaborate words are substituted for simple ones and longer sentences are used to try to convey multiple ideas. It is an attempt to make authors sound like they know more about a subject by using jargon terms and connecting different concepts together.

Big, descriptive adjectives and adverbs. Superfluous words. If you want to avoid flowery writing then go with short, strong, declarative sentences.

3. MAY NOT BE THE BEST IDEA TO TALK TO YOUR AUDIENCE DURING YOUR STORY

It's not always a good idea for your novel to talk back to readers.

In most stories, the narrator is telling the story to an ambiguous "someone." The fourth wall (the reader) is never broken, and everything happens as if no one was watching. Think of this like watching TV. When you're watching your shows or a movie, is the narrator/characters talking to you the whole time, or are they focused on the story, as if you are not even there?

Funnily enough, sometimes narrators do break that wall and speak directly to the reader. Done well, it can make the reader feel as if they're listening to a story by a good friend. BUT done poorly, it jars the reader out of the story and reminds them they're reading a story. And that's not something readers want to be reminded of. It's nice to read and pretend that you are part of the world of the characters. Who doesn't want to escape real life for a little while?

In conclusion, I'm not saying it can't be done. As I stated, it just must be done well, and without breaking the reader's concentration.

4. WRITING A STORY THAT LACKS STAKES/CONFLICT

Whatever your novel is about, does it have stakes? Any conflict throughout the chapters? What can I get hooked on? What can I look forward to? What can I, the reader, become anxious about?

When a novel is written without some type of conflict build, it can leave the reader EXTREMELY disappointed. It can even make the novel drag.

I'm going to use an example. Let's use twilight (I know, I know - it's the only thing I can come up with right now lol). Edward Cullen was a mysterious dark character from the jump. Bella worked through the first 12 chapters to find out what Edward was exactly (though we all knew lol). Once that was over, the rest of the book, the stakes became higher. How was her relationship ever going to work with a vampire? And who are these other bad vampires killing people in the town? Will her father, Charlie, find out? Will Bella become a vamp eventually?

See all the Things to look forward to? If your book is action, thriller, romance, or erotica - it doesn't matter. Just makes sure it has conflict and stakes.

5. DRAGGING THE CHAPTER OUT WITH INFORMATION NOT NEEDED IN THE BOOK

If your story isn't getting to the point with each chapter written, I'm afraid there is a strong chance your book is dragging. Every chapter should be helping your next chapter in some form/fashion of way. Readers should be able to look back and be like "Oh yeah, the writer did mention this character is allergic to basil in chapter 5," when the character mistakenly eats basil and is rushed to the hospital in chapter 10.

I wrote claims on a Soul and at the end, I had 60 chapters. But when I worked with editors and agents, some of those chapters weren't getting to the point. At least 8 chapters were cut. Not because they were bad chapters. They had no meaning in helping the book further its plot.

6. NO EDITING OF YOUR BOOK

There are a few points to be made here. Actually, there are many. But I'm only going to speak on four since I tend to see a lot of this on Wattpad.

A. Here, on Wattpad, there are a few stories I come across with nothing but one-page paragraphs... literally. No breaks to indicate paragraphs. No spaces. No nothing. One page with a bunch of words scooped together with dialogue mixed in. If you find you are not getting comments, reads, and votes, I can almost 100 percent promise this is why.

B. When dialogue is scooped together in the same paragraph, this, too, is a problem. see the example below in italics. Two people are talking.

"Well, think about this," Dean reminded me. "Now that you're going to come to live with us, you won't have to eat any more of Elena's horrid cooking." I forced a smile. "You're going to be okay," he whispered. "I'm going to make sure of it." "I just want this day to be over." "And it will be," he promised. "Just hang in there, okay? You're halfway there." Defeated by the tears, I leaned back into the couch, closing my eyes. Dean leaned back too and let me rest my cheek on his shoulder." I tell you what," he whispered. "When I finish helping you pack, and we bring your stuff to my house tonight, we'll pop some corn, put on our favorite anime, and bake cupcakes like we used to."

A little confusing, right? :)

You are leaving the reader to do entirely too much work to try to figure out who is talking to who, and 9 times out of 10 they are going to quickly exit your story.

C. Too long of paragraphs. Even if there is no dialogue going on, be mindful of the length of your paragraphs. When a reader turns the page and they see a huge paragraph (like a page long), sometimes it can be a little jarring/tiring.

D. As for editing (correcting) your grammar. It's so important to get a second opinion on your work. You can check over it all day long, but what most fail to understand is that eventually, you become biased toward your own work. Just because it looks and sounds good, doesn't mean it is good.

I am a victim of this as well. Every time I turn in a book, FULLY CONFIDENT that there are no errors - I always get my manuscript back coated in red ink. Be careful you are not biased in your writing.

CRITIQUE PARTNERS ARE SOOOO ESSENTIAL. Unless you majored in English or have some type of degree or real professional experience in corrections or proofreading – yes, I strongly recommend a critique partner or professional services to look over your work before handing it over to a publisher, etc. Even Grammarly is a good way to go - just do something to help your writing.

7. HAVE A HOOK DURING YOUR OPENING CHAPTERS.

When readers read your very first chapter, 9 times out of 10 they will know if your book is something they can somewhat get into. I had a lot of problems with this one myself. I must have opened my book, Claims on a Soul, in ten different ways.

A few things that will attract readers are the voice of the character, the grammar, the professionalism, and the effort. And the biggest one of all... the hook.

If your character is enjoying the beach on a sunny afternoon while drinking a margarita and thinking about life, that's nice for a first chapter.

If your character is enjoying the beach on a sunny afternoon while drinking a margarita and thinking about life, and in the midst of those thoughts, spots her husband flirting with another woman, and at that moment, a shooting breaks out leaving her husband scrambling back over to save her, but the woman character is grazed by a bullet in the shoulder and the husband tackles her to the ground, getting shot himself - haha I'm just rambling - but you got to admit - it sounds a little better than the first example.

Hooks for the first few chapters are important.

8. TOO MUCH BACKSTORY

Information dumps – as my editors call it. There were times I turned in chapters and got half my chapter back because they took out irrelevant information.

Let's say you have a character named John. John is graduating from Stanford soon. His fav color is teal. He loves dogs. His parents died in a house fire two years. His brother is getting married next week. His sister is leading an LGBTQ parade movement and his best friend, Clint, is up for the world champion heavyweight title.

All this is something we don't need to know about John in the first chapter. Even the first 5 chapters. When this happens, the reader is pulled out of the scene you were trying to create, and their concentration is broken away from John alone.

Give your audience a chance to learn about the character. This almost goes back to the 'telling vs showing'. If all of John's information is that important to be shared, it will re-appear at some point in time in the book again – Like when another character is trying to get to know John. Then John can have the opportunity to give out some of these details of his life.

REVEAL ONLY THE INFORMATION THAT IS ABSOLUTELY NECESSARY FOR THE READER – AT THAT MOMENT - TO UNDERSTAND YOUR STORY.

These are just a few tips I thought could be helpful. I hope you were able to take away something from here and apply it to your own writing :) Or maybe you already knew some of this. Either way, I wish you a happy and long career of healthy, loving writing :)

#writerssticktogether

-Trish

P.S. - if you guys are interested, I can also give out PLENTY of tips when it comes to connecting with agents/publishers, query letters, and all that good stuff :)