Chapter 18

I was trying hard to open my eyes while my phone is ringing somewhere. I'm still so sleepy, anong oras na ba?

Nang tuluyan akong nagmulat ay nakita ko ang phone sa ibabaw ng lamesa na katabi ng kama ko. Axev is calling. Agad ko itong sinagot at nakapikit na bumalik sa pagkakahiga.

"Hello?" I said lazily.

"Happy Birthday," he said and chuckled.

Minulat ko ang isang mata at nilayo ang phone para makita ang oras. It's 12:05 in the morning. I groaned but there was a smile on my lips. This guy, really. He said he'll be the first to greet me and he really fulfilled his promise.

"Thank you..." I whispered.

"Oh, pwede ka na ulit matulog." He laughed.

"How dare you." I said jokingly. "You ruined my beauty sleep just for this. Dapat nag-text ka na lang."

"Come on, go to sleep, it's your big day today. I'll see you later." He said softly.

I was busy the whole day. Tita hired a debut organizer. I told them that it doesn't need to be so grand but I don't know if I can call it simple after everything is organized. Sa garden gaganapin ang party at naipadala na lahat ng invitation card.

I invited my classmates and some of those who belong to my circle of friends. Alas sais magsisimula ang party. There was also a group of make-up artists and they spent an hour grooming me. I was still in my room when the party already started.

I can hear Tita's welcome speech. I received some texts but I didn't reply because I feel a bit tensed. I don't know, maybe it was the excitement. And when they called me for my entrance, Tito was there to walk me towards the queen chair in front.

While we were walking on the red carpet matted with petals of pink roses, I saw Axev with his friends on a table near my friends' table. He smiled when our eyes met. I bit my lower lip and smiled back at him.

The AVP presentation came next, which shows some of my pictures as a kid and when I'm growing up. There was also a video of me dancing and doing crazy stuffs. Hindi ko alam kung saan nakuha nina Tita 'yon but I know for sure that some came from my friends.

There was a picture of me and my mother. Nag-iisa lang 'yon. Nagtagal ang tingin ko ro'n at kahit nawala na ay hindi ito matanggal sa isip ko. Sa gitna ng sayang nararamdaman ko, my heart was bleeding. Kung hindi lang sobrang nakakatawa 'yong host ay hindi ko maiwawala ang atensyon do'n.

The dinner came next then after that was the party games. Ang mga kaklase ko ang sobrang hyper at hindi nagpapahuli sa mga laro. I saw Brett and Gavrie participating in one game and they were hilarious. Si Axev naman, nasa table lang kasama si Camden at pinapanood ang mga kaibigan nila.

Tito was my first dance and Axev came last. I smirked while watching him walk towards me. He was wearing a dark blue long sleeves and dark pants.

His hair was gelled which is unusual but it suits him. He looks more formal and serious! Hindi ko tuloy alam kung mas bagay ba sa kaniya ito o 'yong natural pa rin na hairstyle niya.

"Happy Birthday," aniya nang makalapit sabay abot ng panghuling rosas sa akin.

"Thank you. You look..." pinasadahan ko ng tingin ang kabuuan niya, "gwapo."

He shook his head, a ghost of smile was on his lips. He put his arm on my waist and held one of my hands. Nilagay ko sa balikat niya ang isang kamay at tiningala siya. I am wearing heels but it is still no match to his built!

Nilingon ni Axev ang music operator at tinanguan ito. My heart pounded when I heard the changing of the music. Kumunot ang noo ko nang marinig ang malamyos na musika. Kung hindi pa gagalaw si Axev baka nanatiling nakapako ang mga paa ko sa sahig.

"I found a love for me

Darling, just dive right in

And follow my lead

Well, I found a girl, beautiful and sweet

I never knew you were the someone waiting for me."

The dance was slow... and sweet. We were too close that I can hear a rapid heartbeat. Hindi ko alam kung sa akin ba 'yon o sa kaniya. I couldn't help but smile when I heard his heavy breathing.

"Are you nervous?" I asked.

He licked his lips and his jaw clenched.

"This is our first dance."

"And?" I raised my brows.

"I will never... forget this day." He said seriously.

Kinagat ko ang pang-ibabang labi at tumango, hindi makapagsalita. I don't know if it's too much happiness. The past months were a pure bliss. You won't believe it but we never had a fight. He was busy with his summer class but he always finds time to go on a date with me.

Kung hindi naman ay bumibisita siya sa bahay. Sometimes, I would visit him at the university after my summer job. At kahit ilang buwan pa lang kami, pakiramdam ko sobrang tagal na. I learned many things about him and the same goes for him. I have never felt this way before... the happiness is too much to handle.

"Baby, I'm dancing in the dark with you between my arms

Barefoot on the grass, we're listenin' to our favorite song

When you said you looked a mess, I whispered underneath my breath

But you heard it, darling, you look perfect tonight."

After our dance, he caressed my cheek and smiled before walking away. I watched him walk back to their table and his friends were immediately teasing him. Umiling ako at bumalik sa upuan.

For the last part, I had to give my speech. I was nervous but the cheering from my friends and family made me relaxed a little. For the last part of my speech, I needed to inhale a large amount of air.

"Tita Marta and Tito Cesar... I may not always say this but please know that I love you both. I may not be your real daughter but you treated me like one. Thank you for giving me the life every child deserves. I realized I don't always thank you enough for everything that you do and for that I apologize. I will find a way to give back to you someday because without the two of you, I don't know where I would be. Thank you and I love you both."

Tita was crying when she went to hug me. Tito came to join the hug too and I couldn't help but tear up. My heart was both bleeding and rejoicing at the same time. But above all that is the gratitude of having the two of them in my life.

Halos alas dose na pero hindi pa rin umuuwi sina Tina. They were drinking with some of my classmates and I had my fair share of drinks too. Nakapagpalit na rin ako ng mas komportableng damit bago ako humalo sa kanila. Kaunti na lang kaming natira at nasa garden kaming lahat.

"Baka dito na matulog sina Tina, may tama na yata." I said to Axev when we're alone.

Nasa garden pa rin kami pero medyo malayo kami sa mga nagkakasiyahan. Hindi nila kami kita dahil hindi pa natatanggal ang mga dekorasyon sa paligid. We were sitting on the grass while staring up to the night sky.

"Uuwi na rin kami maya maya. Hindi ka pa ba inaantok?" Tanong niya habang pinipisil ang isang kamay ko.

"I'm just exhausted." I said and put my head on his shoulder.

"Did you enjoy this day?"

Tumango ako sa tanong niya. Hindi ko maiwasang mamangha sa langit na punong puno ng bituin. My birthday must be really special, huh? Even the sky was celebrating with me. The stars were shining in between the darkness.

"Pasukan na naman," I groaned.

He chuckled and intertwined our hands. Tiningnan ko 'yon at hindi maiwasang ngumiti. I snuggled closer to him as we both stare at our hands.

"Are you not excited for college?"

"A little. Pakiramdam ko hindi pa ako handa." I laughed softly.

"Don't worry, I'll guide you." Aniya.

"Siguro naman hindi ka na aasarin ng mga kaibigan mo? I'm already in college and not a minor anymore!" I tilted my head to look at him.

Umiling lang siya na ikinatawa ko. Inangat ko muli ang tingin sa langit. Hindi ko maiwasang mag-isip habang nakatitig do'n.

"Evander... may tanong ako. Just a random question." I said and glanced at him.

Nilingon niya ako at nagtaas ng kilay. "Ano?"

"Sa tingin mo... tayo hanggang huli? I mean... let's face it, bata pa tayo... I mean ako," tumawa ako, "at marami pang pwedeng mangyari sa ating dalawa sa paglipas ng panahon. Do you think it will still be us in the end?"

Tinitigan niya ako. Umigting ang panga niya at pinasadahan ang kabuuan ng mukha ko.

"If we keep choosing each other... yeah, it will still be us in the end."

Kinagat ko ang labi at napakurap. "Pero paano kung bigla tayong nag-away? Hindi pa kaya tayo nag-aaway."

"Bakit? Gusto mo bang mag-away tayo?" Tumaas ang kilay niya.

Tumawa ako at umiling. Kumunot lang ang noo niya sa akin. He was caressing the bracelet he gave me while watching me intensely.

"Are you crazy? Of course not!" I glared at him. "Ang ibig kong sabihin, paano kung mag-away tayo? Iyong grabe? O magkaroon ng problema na hindi madaling lutasin? Posible naman 'yon 'di ba? Iyong masaya tayo ngayon pero bukas hindi na?"

"Kung may 'di tayo pagkakaintindihan, pag-usapan natin agad. Huwag na nating palakihin. Kung may problema, sabihin mo sa akin agad. Kaya nga dalawa tayo sa relasyong ito para magtulungan tayo. Hindi 'yong sinasarili ang problema."

Ngumuso ako at tumango. But it wouldn't be easy right? Ang daling sabihin pero ang totoo ay mahirap.

"Piliin natin ang isa't isa sa bawat araw hindi lang sa mga oras na masaya tayo." Axev said and stared at me.

"But you know it's not easy," I said.

"It won't be easy but it will be worth it. Mag-aaway tayo, magkaka-tampuhan pero normal lang naman 'yon. Bakit? Bibitawan mo ba ako agad kapag nag-away tayo?" His voice was husky.

My heart clenched at his question. Bakit parang masakit itong pinag-uusapan namin? Umiling ako at pinatong ang baba sa balikat niya habang nakatingin sa kaniya.

"I will do my best to keep choosing you, always." I said.

He stared at me. I closed my eyes when he kissed my forehead. Huminga ako ng malalim.

"I love you." He whispered.

I literally froze because this is the first time in months that somebody of us said those words. This is the first time. I slowly opened my eyes and when I caught him watching me, my lips parted.

Humigpit ang hawak niya sa kamay ko. Tumaas ang isang kamay niya at hinawi ang ilang hibla ng buhok na tumatakip sa mukha ko.

"We still have a long way to go. Tama ka, marami pang pwedeng mangyari sa paglipas ng panahon. Pero sigurado akong pipiliin pa rin kita sa kahit anong sitwasyon. Kung nahihirapan ka, sabihin mo sa akin. Kung may hindi ka gusto, sabihin mo sa akin. I will try my best to work things out for us." He said and smiled a little.

Humugot ako ng malalim na hininga at tumango. My heart was thrusting wildly in my chest and honestly, I don't know what to say. But in my heart, I know that I am with him. In this journey and in this fight.

"Putanginang 'yan." Anang Tina habang nakatingin sa papel niya.

Tumawa ako at tiningnan ang papel niya. 1 over 10. Umiling ako at pinakita sa kaniya ang papel ko. Katatapos lang ng pre-test namin sa isang minor subject at nag-checking kami agad.

"Huwag kang mag-alala, lamang lang ako sayo ng isa." I said and laughed.

College is a bitch. I swear!

First week of classes and we're already bombarded with pre-tests! Magkaklase kami ni Tina. Si Nicus ay napunta sa ibang set. Nagsimula kami agad sa lessons sa ibang subject. We already met one of our major yesterday at agad kaming nagpre-test do'n.

We had a thirty minutes break before our next subject again kaya lumabas muna kami ni Tina. Wala kaming ginawa kundi pag-usapan 'yong mga teacher namin habang bumibili ng buko juice.

"Major natin susunod 'di ba?" Tanong niya.

Tumango ako. Today is Friday. Wala ng dalawang araw 'yong isang major teacher kaya hindi pa namin siya nami-meet. Yesica and Cadeo are in the main campus, dahil Engineering ang kinukuha nila. Kami naman, nanatili sa Lecaros dahil do'n ang campus ng Health and Allied Sciences.

Ang ilang minor subject namin ay sa campus ang room kaya palipat lipat kami. Well, this is college. And we're still on the adjustment stage. Hindi ko alam kung bakit isang linggo pa lang pakiramdam ko stressed na ako. Maybe it's the culture shock or more things I am not used to that piled up.

Nang mahanap namin ang room for the next subject, umupo kami agad sa pinakalikod. We made friends with some of our new classmates. Marami ang galing sa ibang unibersidad at iilan lang ang kaklase naming kaklase namin dati.

Nang bumukas ang pintuan at pumasok do'n ang isang babaeng nakasalamin at may hawak na libro ay agad kaming umayos. Dumiretso siya sa teacher's table at nilapag do'n ang libro. Tumingin siya sa amin at sa klase pa lang ng tingin niya ay alam kong suplada na ito.

"Good afternoon. I'm your instructor for your Anatomy and Physiology." And even her voice sounds cold!

"Good afternoon, Ma'am."

"Bring out one fourth sheet of yellow paper. You have two minutes to prepare." She said and sat down on the chair.

Napangiwi ako agad. Don't tell me another pre-test? Narinig ko ang pag-aalburuto ni Tina sa tabi ko. Wala siyang dalang papel kaya naman nakihati pa siya sa akin. I feel so nervous, gosh.

"Okay number one," she said even though some students are still not done preparing. "It is the scientific discipline that investigates the structure of the body."

Kumunot ang noo ko sa tanong niya. Anatomy? Umiling ako at iyon ang sinulat. I'm sure it's Anatomy. Medyo malakas ang bulungan sa mga studyante.

"This is a pre-test, no need to look at your classmate's paper." Hindi ko alam kung galit siya o ano.

"Next, it is the existence and maintenance of a relatively constant environment in the body despite fluctuations in either the external or internal environment."

Excuse me, what? Nagkatinginan kami ni Tina parehong hindi alam. Ang iba'y nagsusulat habang ang iba'y nakatunganga katulad namin. Shit. Is this for real?

"For the fifth question, it is an overabundance of red blood cells."

Pumikit ako ng mariin, pilit inaalala kung inaral ba namin 'yan sa Senior High. Narinig ko ang mahinang tawa ni Tina kaya nilingon ko siya.

"Ano 'yon? Red horse?" Aniya.

I glared at her. Umiling siya, natatawa pa rin. Ganiyan siguro kapag wala ng maisagot.

"Last question, this process is called programmed cell death."

Muntik na akong mapamura dahil alam ko 'yong sagot. I wrote Apoptosis on my paper and glanced at Tina. She was writing on her paper too so I assumed she knows the answer.

After the pre-test, we exchanged papers for the checking. And guess what? I got 3 over 10 and Tina got 2. I was laughing so hard on my seat when I checked her answers.

"Anong necrosis? Apoptosis 'yon! Kapag necrosis, not programmed cell death 'yon. We learned that in Senior High." Pangaral ko sa kaniya.

Hinilamos niya ang kamay sa mukha at bumuga ng hangin. I was still laughing. Hindi naman ako disappointed sa score ko. The highest was nine so I guess that kid is a genius!

"Tangina, nasa tamang kurso ba ako?" She groaned and palmed her face again.

"Come on, first week pa lang 'to. We can do this!" Inakbayan ko siya.

Nang mag-uwian ay dumiretso kami agad sa main. It was our last subject and it's still six in the evening. Ang pinaka-maagang uwian ko ay alas kwatro at ang pinaka-late naman ay alas sais. We met with Nicus and Cadeo at the learning hall. Hindi magkaklase si Yesica at Cadeo kaya mas nauuna ang uwian niya.

"Hindi ka pa uuwi, Sien?" Tanong ni Tina nang nag-aayos na silang tatlo.

Umiling ako at tiningnan ang relo. It's quarter to 7 in the evening and seven is Axev's dismissal.

"Hintayin ko pa si Axev. Kahit mauna na kayo." Sabi ko.

Tumango sila at umalis na. I yawned and massaged my temple. Nasa akin ang sched ni Axev at nasa kaniya naman 'yong akin. Usually, Monday and Wednesday lang kami nagsasabay ng lunch. Sa Tuesday and Thursday, pareho kaming may break ng alas dos hanggang alas tres kaya magkasama kami. At sa Friday, sa uwian lang kami available na dalawa.

Niyukyok ko ang ulo sa lamesa at pumikit. I feel exhausted, buti na lang at Saturday bukas. Kaso may lakad kami ni Tina. Bibili ng libro para sa dalawang major namin. I was still on that position when I felt a hand on my shoulder. Agad akong nag-angat ng tingin at nakita si Axev na nakatayo sa gilid ko.

"Pagod?" He asked and sat down beside me.

I raked a hand through my hair and nodded. Tinakpan ko ang bibig nang muli akong humikab. Axev smiled and pointed my nose.

"Jollibee tayo?" I pouted.

That's my comfort food whenever I'm stressed or exhausted. At matagal na rin no'ng huling kain ko ro'n.

He sighed and smiled again. "Tara na. Para naman ngumiti ka na diya'n."

Inakbayan niya ako habang papalabas kami ng university. He even carried my bag even though I insisted that I can carry it.

"How's the first week of school?" He asked.

Ngumuso ako at kinuwento ang nangyari ngayong araw. Even the part where I got a low score. I was even laughing while telling him that.

"It's fine. Pre-test lang naman, just to test your knowledge. Kapag nakabili ka na ng libro, mag-advance reading ka. I'll help you review yourself if you want." He tapped my shoulder.

"Kaya ko naman, 'tsaka, you'll be very busy. Fourth year ka na. Ikaw? Kamusta naman?"

Tumawa siya at umiling. "Gano'n pa rin naman. Mas humirap lang mga subjects."

"If you need anything, just tell me." I said.

"And what would that be?" Tumaas ang kilat niya at pinisil ng bahagya ang pisngi ko.

"Yakap ko? Kiss ko? Stress reliever kaya mga 'yon." I smirked.

He tssed and shook his head. I laughed and put my arm on his waist.

"I'm just kidding. Kung may kailangan ka, magsabi ka rin. Malay mo may maitutulong rin ako, 'di ba?" Ngumuso ako.

Tumango siya at ngumiti. Nang makarating kami sa Jollibee ay naghanap kami ng upuan. Siya ang nag-order para sa amin. He was shaking his head while looking at my order. I smirked at him.

"Uminom ka ng maraming tubig mamaya." Bilin niya.

"Opo, Kuya." I teased and he just glared at me.

Habang kumakain kami ay may pumansin sa kaniya. Nag-angat ako ng tingin at natigilan nang makita ang pamilyar na babae. His classmate before? What's her name again? Jam? May kasama itong dalawang lalaki. Lumapit siya sa amin kaya sumunod ang dalawang lalaki na nakipag-high five kay Axev.

"Tapos mo na 'yong sa SATD?" Tanong ni Jam kay Axev.

"Tatapusin pa lang." Tugon ni Axev.

Nilingon ako ng babae at tipid na ngumiti. I didn't smile back though, I was chewing my fries while watching them.

"Jowa mo, pare?" Tanong ng isa sa mga lalaki.

"Oo." Axev replied and glanced at me.

"Uy, pasend pala ako ng PDF no'ng sa English 3, ha? Wala pa sa akin e." Tinapik ni Jam ang balikat ni Axev.

Tumango lang si Axev. Nagpaalam din silang tatlo at pumunta sa malayong table. I pursed my lips while watching them settle down. I glanced at Axev who's sipping on his water.

"Mga kaklase mo?" I asked.

"Oo," he nodded.

Oh. So she's still his classmate? Consistent, huh? My lips twitched at that. I really don't want to judge but I have a different feeling on that girl. Umiling ako at nagkibit-balikat. Sana lang ay hindi tama ang hinala ko.

"May gusto ka pa? Mukhang kulang pa 'yang fries mo, e." Axev smirked at me.

"Enough na. Baka tumaba pa ako," tiningnan ko siya ng masama.

He just chuckled and waited for me to finish my food. Pagkatapos namin do'n ay naglakad lakad