Chapter 32 - A Gale Of Painful Memories

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Boy, this book is much longer than anticipated. I'm nearing the end though! I appreciate any comments, votes and shares. They help a lot. Thanks!---

We walked down the street in silence. I followed close behind Gale. He was looking off into the distance, like he was thinking about something.

"What was the favor you wanted?" He broke the silence. I gleamed at him, excited he might be interested. 

"I'm not saying I'll accept it though, so don't get all... that." He gestured to me. I frowned a bit.

"I was going to ask if you'd play a game of soccer with me for my final match with Zeal."

"What the hell does that have to do with this whole situation?" He asked like I was crazy.

"Well... Zeal's competition isn't as friendly as he's making it seem." As I spoke Gale narrowed his eyes at me. "He said if I were to win he'd leave me and Liam alone, but if I lost he'd have full control over me, and I assume he'd continue harassing Liam. I would've refused the challenge but he said He'd make our lives hell..."

"So this is really just about saving yourself then huh." He responded thinking he had figured out my intentions.

"No one knows what I've been going through. There's not much Zeal could do to make my life any worse." I say, slowing up. "I don't care what happens to me, as long as Liam is okay."

"If you're telling the truth, why go through all of this trouble for Liam?" He questioned. I thought for a second, then froze.

"I... I think I like him." I admitted shyly, though I don't know why.

"Fag." Gale chuckled. That single word made my frown deepen.

"I-I didn't choose to like him... It just happened." I defend. "I don't care if the feeling isn't mutual. I just want him to be happy."

"I suppose, that would be considered real love." Gale said, more serious this time. My heart skipped a beat. So what I've been feeling really was love? I was expecting more insults from him, so that came as a surprise.

"I can't say I'm any good at soccer." He changed the topic, shrugging.

"Well, it looks like we're here." Gale spoke in a simple sigh, cutting me off before I had a chance to speak. 

"Any thing in particular you want?" He asked, speaking about the ice cream.

"A-anything is fine." I responded, trying not to bother him. I'm usually indecisive when it comes to ice cream.

"I hate it when people give me that answer." He groaned before heading in the ice cream shop. I felt bad for not being able to decide on a flavor.

"Two cups, one peach, one blueberry." He quickly demanded, heading up to the counter.

"One moment." The girl behind the counter stated. Her arms moved back and forth grabbing and moving things, which were out of my vision. She placed two styrofoam cups, containing two plastic spoons at the top of the counter.

"That'll be seven dollars." She announced. Gale placed a ten dollar bill on the counter and grabbed the two cups.

"Keep the change." He said walking away, waving backwards with a cup in his hand. That was nice of him... Unless he was trying to be a show off. It made her happy though, so either way it counts. When he exited the store he handed me a cup. It looked to be the blueberry flavor. We made our way to a near by park in silence. While it filled the air my mind wandered. Why did Gale hate me? Is it cause I'm gay, ugly, or annoying, or all of those?

We made our way to a bench located under a tree just off the sidewalk in the park. The tree covered our top half in shade from the bright sun. The warmth from the sun hitting my legs made me sleepy. The sound of the passing planes made it feel like a true summer day. Neither of us had touched our ice cream yet. I was still too lost in thought to eat, I don't know why he hadn't started yet though.

"Gale... why do you hate me?" I suddenly ask in a hushed tired voice. "Is it cause I'm gay?"

"So you admit it huh?" He chuckles. I didn't reply.

"I never hated you cause you were gay." He admitted. 

"It was cause you had something I didn't until very recently." He clarified. I looked at him leaning on the back of the bench with his arms thrown behind it.

"W-what was it?" I ask, nervous for the answer.

"Loving parents. You were an easy target I suppose." His answer confused me greatly. He noticed my expression and sighed.

"When I was ten my dad left for the army. My mom didn't approve of him going, she didn't want him getting hurt. He ended up going anyway. It drove her into depression, so she coped with it by working overtime at her job, avoiding the house. Whenever she came home she'd just lock herself in her room. She left me home alone all the time. I don't resent her for it, It just upset that she didn't realize I was hurting as well. Not only from dad leaving, but her too. I had no way to cope with it like she did. I did things... to try an get my mind away from it all, things I'm not comfortable talking about. But last week my father came home, for good. When my mom heard the news she took time off her job to spend at home. We finally became a whole family again." He explains with a smile growing across his face. I was about to correct him about my parents but he continued speaking.

"Every time I saw you arrive at school it made me jealous that your parents took the time to drop you off, and you always had home cooked meals for lunch and breakfast. During that period of time my mom neglected me she hadn't cooked me a single meal." Is that what he thought?

"You're wrong..." I choked up thinking about my parents.

"Huh, what did you say?" He said, quickly getting worked up.

"My parents haven't dropped me off at school since I was about eight." Memories I've been trying so hard to suppress were resurfacing. I tried locking them in the back of my mind, still holding onto any hope of my parents loving me.

"What do you mean? I know you don't ride the bus, and you're always coming from the driveway at school." He uttered, not settling down.

"I walk..." I answer, covering my face in case any oncoming tears were visible. He paused for awhile.

"Why not ride the bus?" He questions.

"I was afraid of being cornered by people. I'd have no where to run, if someone were to attack me." I answer. He froze in his spot looking towards me with a frown, still tense.

"Well, you still had your parents cooking to bring to school everyday." He said, calming down in his seat a bit.

"I cook all of my meals." It came out sounding normal thankfully. I'm on the brink of tears right now and I don't want it to show. Gale's guilt grew noticeably with every one of my responses. 

"Your parents don't cook?" He said, getting more curious.

"I wish they did. That would make me very happy. I'd even be satisfied just cooking for them. If I'd waited for their meals I would've been dead long ago." I state.

"What do you mean?" He asks, getting more confused.

"I haven't seen them in almost three months. I'm not even sure where they are right now. The only time we talk is when I call them. It seems like they're always in a rush, like they don't want to talk to me. They never call to check in with me, to see if I'm okay. They used to come home every month for a couple of days, but even then they seemed so distant. Ever since I was young we never spent holidays together, we never traveled together, or even ate at the same table." Speaking this made a lump form in the back of my throat. The memories became all too painful. Gale sat there, silent.

"When I was ten... I noticed something different about my parents, different than a lot of kids' parents around my age." I felt tears suddenly streaming down my face.

"They were much younger. My mother was only twenty three at the time, and my father, twenty five." I sobbed. Shoot, I couldn't hide it anymore, I couldn't contain my overflowing despair. The look on Gale's face matched that of pure terror, though I don't quite understand why.

"They were only thirteen and fifteen when I was born. That means... that means I was most likely a mistake." My sobs now becoming uncontrollable. I'd never known I was this fragile.

"T-The pain grew far worse as I began to be more aware of the situation as I aged." I wept, not being able to contain a single amount of emotion. Gale still wore the look on his face.

"I ruined their lives. They must hate me, right?" I began hyperventilating, soon followed by trembling. I was having a panic attack, from digging up these memories. I should have avoided the conversation.

"I-I'm sure they love you. If they hated you why would they decide to raise you themselves?" He said, wrapping an arm around me, pulling me to his side. I jumped in a state of alarm, thinking he was going to attack me. My body froze and wouldn't move. After we sat like that for awhile I realized he had no hostile intentions. Things felt so unreal at that point. Gale was actually trying to comfort me? His words gave me some hope. My breathing calmed and I felt my light headed-ness fading away. I had my head placed at his side. I sobbed in his embrace, staining his blue shirt in tears. Our ice cream sat beside us, sit untouched.

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