"Babe you are going to be late for you're appointment" Jax yelled down the hall he had been waiting on Harlow for the last thirty minutes

"Yeah i know i will be done in a few minutes" Harlow yelled as she still sat on her bed

"Babe come on, lets go" Jax yelled again

Harlow rolled her eyes as she stood up and slipped her sneakers on she wasn't ready for this at all. Not the appointment, not the news that comes with the appointment. Grabbing her purse she walked down the hall and saw Jax standing there with his arms crossed over his chest, and he was pissed

"Sorry I was doing my hair" Harlow lied as she ran her fingers through her tangled hair

"Bullshit, come on lets go. The doctor's office is gonna be pissed you are late" Jax said

"They will get over it" Harlow said

"Just please stop with the attitude" Jax said as they left the house

Harlow gulped hard as the doctor walked into the room, Jax gripped her hand tightly as he felt Harlow tense. The last few weeks had been like a whirlwind of effects. After Jax brought up the lump in Harlow's breast they got into a huge argument because she didn't want to got to the doctors she didn't want Jax to go with her. Harlow didn't want to know. She already knew though. She knew the week before Jax even told her but admitting it was the hardest part. She knew what came next, a line full of tests and choices, choices she wasn't ready to make yet

"Harlow its good to see you again" Dr. Yen said smiling at Harlow and Jax. Harlow only agreed to go see a doctor if it was her mothers doctor when Veda was first diagnosed with cancer

"Dr. Yen, nice to see you too. I just wish it was on better circumstances" Harlow said

"Well I have some news that I know you don't want to hear" Dr. Yen said sitting down at her desk

"You are right I don't to hear it, so how about you don't tell me" Harlow said leaning back in the chair

"Babe" Jax whispered

"I think you both should talk things over before we decide on a course of treatment" Dr. Yen said standing up from her chair and excusing herself

Harlow ran her hand through her hair, she knew that she would be losing it soon and then she would have to result in wearing a wig until her hair came back, if it came back. Looking at Jax she knew that she should be talking to him about what to do and how everything was going to happen she couldn't. She didn't want Jax to watch her go through the emotional chemotherapy treatments, and she was terrified if it spread and what stage it was in. She knew she should of been to the doctor sooner but she couldn't, she was afraid. Afraid for Jax. Afraid for her children

"Why don't you want to know" Jax asked looking at his wife wishing he could read her mind at this very moment

"Because I don't. I already know" Harlow said turning around

"Know what? You don't know how bad it is, You don't know anything babe. Why wont you just listen to the doctor so we can get this under control?" Jax asked standing up and stepping toward Harlow

Harlow froze, she knew she needed to talk to Jax about what to expect, that he was going to have to abandon everything to take care of her or put her in the hospital and wait for her to die like she did to her mother. Harlow touched Jax's face and smiled at him. Placing a kiss on his lips she pulled back and looked at the tears in his eyes

"I already know what is going to happen. I am going to start chemo and my hair is going to fall out and i am not going to be able to do much once the chemo starts" Harlow said

"You don't know that babe, you don't even know how bad it is" Jax said touching her face

"Oh I think i have a good idea of how bad it is Jax" Harlow said looking away

"Did you know before I even brought it up?" Jax asked looking at Harlow

Harlow wasn't ready "Yes"

Jax's eyes got wide "What do you mean you already knew? how? I haven't seen you come up here for an appointment" Jax said

"You know that I love you more then anything in the world right? And that without you in my life nothing would of been possible? Abel and Veda and i would still be in a shitty relationship with Stan and Piper wouldn't have an amazing father to look up to" Harlow said looking at Jax as the tears began to fall

"I know that you love me Harlow I don't understand where this is going though" Jax said brushing a tear away from her face

"Do you remember when you promised that you were going to break my wall down?" Harlow asked

Jax nodded still not understanding what was going on and why his wife wasn't saying exactly what was wrong with her

"You broke me Jackson, you climbed over my wall and you knocked it down and I admire you for that" Harlow cried she wasn't ready, she wasn't ready to tell him

"Babe please tell me you are scaring me" Jax said as tears welled up in his eyes

Harlow looked at her husband, not her old man. He was scared, and he was going to be even more scared on the road ahead and internally Harlow prayed that Jax would stick by her side through everything. That he would help her get out of bed in the morning when she could barely move. Or that he would help her eat her breakfast when her hands were too weak to hold a spoon. She hoped that Jax would be able to understand what she was about to tell him and not be upset.

Harlow's mouth went dry as she hugged her husband tightly pulling back Harlow cupped Jax's face and looked him in the eyes

"I have been through this before, I know what is going to happen" Harlow said

"What do you mean you've been through this before?" Jax asked

"When I was sixteen I had breast cancer. And its back" Harlow said