Ranae

I woke up to my parents arguing for a good thirty minutes about who knows what and then Cameron walks in, calming them down. I immediately got annoyed at him even being in this house that's why I stay in my room when he's here. Like I don't want nothing to do with him. Who leaves out the blue and cuts and blocks everyone out of his life for five years? He left me knowing he was my best friend in this house and in school. But good thing I got closer to the girls, Kev, and Eli. So him being here is pointless.

But currently I was finishing the rest of my homework while watching Spongebob and eating gummy bears.

My phone vibrated while ringing, making me jump hard. I looked at it and it was Anthony and I instantly get butterflies. "Hello?"

           "Wassup mamas. Whatchu doin'?"

            "Homework, how about you?"

            "At the studio and rollin' one.  Let me see you."

My phone begin beeping indicating him requesting to face time. And I grew so freaking nervous. Like how do you prepare for a unexpected FaceTime?

I answered and he was indeed high from the looks of things.

He stared at me for a few sec and didn't say anything. It made me feel more nervous and awkward. "What?"

         "You pretty as shit mamas." He said going back to rolling up. Heat rushed to my cheeks as I blushed.

         "Thank you." I said going back to my homework. The sound of a people talking was heard and a beat played in the background and he was bobbing his head to it.

I focused back on the last three questions of my homework. I hated doing these essays at the end. Looks like I wrote an entire book from looking at my answers from these long ass questions.

I glanced at Anthony and he was lighting his blunt. I think he just called me to sit on the phone. And I guess he felt me looking and looked down at me.  "Always grillin' me."

          I chuckled rolling my eyes. "Yep."

          "Whats yo plans fa' the day?"

           "To find me something to eat then go to sleep."

          "Nahh, go get ready."

I raised a brow at him and chuckled. He's always trying to take me somewhere. "I still have homework. Do you know what that is?"

He frowned at me and I laughed. "Yeah. The same shit they teach over and over,  just switched around."

I laughed, shaking my head. "Wow."

           "But fa'real. Go get ready."

            "Where're we going?"

            "It's a spot we can eat and chill at. Imma call you when I'm outside."

            "Okay. See you soon."

           "Ight beautiful."

With that he hung up and I continued to finish my homework. I don't think he's gonna be on his way right now so I'm finishing.

It's been over half an hour and I was finally done. I put my binder and stuff away in my bag and set it down. My phone dinged and I checked it, seeing a notification from Instagram.

I opened it and it was a DM's from Jared. He sent multiple messages and liked my pictures. I opened them and rolled my eyes hard.

JTheGod: hey.

JTheGod: this probably won't matter but i ain't with candy anymore.

JTheGod: we cool?

What does him not being with her have to do with me? What's the point in telling me? I left him on read, putting my phone on the charger and went to get ready to meet Anthony.

After showering for a good thirty minutes and putting on lotion, I picked out my black undergarments and an outfit, putting them on. I went to do my hair and I simply took it out the wrap I had it in and combed it down. It still had curls so I left it be. I sprayed some perfume on and turned my bathroom light out.

My phone ringed and I answered. "I'm coming."

          "Ight."

I hung up and grabbed my bag, putting my stuff I was taking in it. I grabbed my keys and jacket, leaving out my room, and closing my door.

I walked downstairs and seen the twins and Cameron on the couch watching tv. He looked back at me and I went into the kitchen. I opened the fridge grabbing two water bottles, putting them in my bag. I closed the fridge and he was standing here, leaning against the counter.

        "Where you going?" He spoke and I didn't respond. He can't be serious right now. "Still not ready to talk to me? I didn't leave for no reason phat phat."

I chuckled, looking up at the ceiling. Everything I went through after finding out he left without a trace started to come back. I was at an all time low and continuously being harassed and bullied didn't help. But I got through it without him.

       "What's the reason?" I looked at him.

       "It's not something I can get into details right now."

        "So why you in my face right now?" I furrowed my brows, face scrunched up.

        "Chill with the attitude Nae. I know you at that age now where you smelling yourself. I'm just trying to have a conversation—"

I let out a laugh, shaking my head. "I'm guessing dad has been planting bugs in your ear about me because you can't possibly think that on your own." I chuckled. "You haven't been here. How would you know I'm doing anything?"

         "Yeah pops told me things and I didn't believe him at first cause it didn't sound like you. But I'm seeing it for myself. I'm just trying to have a conversation with you phat phat."

         "Anything our father tells you about me, it's what he thinks, it's not facts. And you don't have to explain anything to me because I don't ever want to have a conversation with you." I walked around him, leaving the kitchen.

I walked out the door and headed towards where I meet Anthony at. I saw his Range Rover and made my way over to him, going to the passenger side, and getting in.

           "Hey." I gave a small smile.

           "Sup mamas. You ready?"

            "Yeah. Where we going?" I asked, putting my seat belt on.

            "To a park up north." He answered and I thought it was a cute little idea of his to want to do this with me. Is it like our first date? I would glance at him from time to time just because. He was so damn handsome for his own good. I'm still a little shocked he's even dealing with me.

We was in a comfortable silence as the music from the radio played. He stopped at a restaurant and gas station, buying us food and snacks. And not even twenty minutes later, we pulled up to the park.

This park had a large playground area that was filled with kids and pre teens, There was a basketball court but that was inside the building, and the community pool was in the back of the building.

He parked and turned off the car. He pulled out his phone and begin texting someone then putting it away.
"You ready?" He asked taking the keys out.

I nodded and he got out they car. I begin grabbing my stuff and my door opened. He held all the bags and a big gym bag in one hand and held his other out for me to take. I took his hand, thanking him as he closed the door.

We begin walking to the open field where you can have barbecues and picnics at and found a spot in the shade near a tree. He opened the duffle bag and pulled out a big blue and black thick comforter. He flick it and it laid out perfectly onto the ground. He pulled out this portable radio and his bag of rolled blunts. He closed it back up and sat down.

I squatted and sat down, crossing my legs at the ankles. He passed me my bag of food as he was lighting his blunt. I begin eating as he smoke, not saying a word. Haven't said anything most of the ride here. He just look like his minds somewhere else right now.

"What's wrong?"

He shook his head, looking at me. "Nun mamas, I'm straight." He said and licks his lips. "Why?"

"Just asking. You haven't said nothing the whole ride here."

"Just Coolin'." He said taking a swig from his kiwi strawberry brisk. "How you feelin'?

I was finished with my food and put the trash in the bag. A four for four from Wendy's go so quick. "I'm feeling okay. It's nice out." He nodded.

He looked away from me, getting on his phone. He begin playing music from the mini speaker. I pulled out mines and got on Instagram. Strolling through, it was the same type of things. A picture caught my eye of a big girl in black stringy lingerie. I clicked on it, going to her profile and seen it better.

Looking through the rest of her pictures, I couldn't help but to think about how bold, confident, and just all around gorgeous she is. I never knew people our size could rock something like this. This not the only photo of her in lingerie either. Her style is dope.

She has a big following, lots of likes on every photo, lots of comments about how great she looks. Like they really loved and adored her. Wish I had it like that.

       "Look at this." I said turning my phone to him. He looked, squinting his eyes to see then taking my phone out my hand. "Can't believe she rocking that. Ain't she pretty?."

He didn't say nothing as he continued to slowly stroll through her pictures. Like looking at each picture, strolling very slow. I watched his facial expressions and he was legit focused on this girls pictures.

Now I started to feel some type of way.

         "She bad." He said handing me back my phone. I took it, following her.

          "Yup." I continued to look through Instagram as I felt his eyes on me.

I hear him chuckle, making me roll my eyes. "You can't offer to show me a females pictures and get mad after."

           "I showed you one but you went for a stroll instead." I mumbled.

            "And she was in lingerie." I rolled my eyes, sighing already over it. "And you can be just as confident as her but you let these weirdos get to you."

I listened to what he was saying as I continued to stroll through my news feed. He don't understand that it's hard being confident in a society where they praise and prefer smaller and plastic filled people.

And I don't think I'll ever get to that level of confidence like that girl. I know I have low self esteem and I'm very insecure. Been like this since third grade. And at the time Cameron was there to help me through that. All the bullies, he stopped it. But since he left everything went down hill for me.

I hear the faint sound of pictures being taking and I looked at him. "Anthonyyy!" I said covering my face. "Delete it."

            "Nahh."

            "Yessuhhhh." I sighed. "Delete it."

            "C'mere." He say and I peeked, seeing him standing up and walking towards the building. I stayed in my spot watching him walk that way. "C'mon Nae."

I rolled my eyes, getting up and walking towards him. We was next to the building where the bathroom was. "Stand right here." He grabbed my hand and placed me in front of the steps of the door. He positioned his phone to take a picture and I immediately put my hands up.

           "Anthony no." I blocked my face.

           "Bruh put yo hands down."

           "Put your phone down first." I hear him smack his lips.

            "You let me take one I will."

            "No."

            "Why?"

"Cause I don't want you to." I peeked through my fingers. He was still aiming his camera at me.

"One picture." He said not giving up. I sighed loud, moving my hands. I stared back at him as he looked back. "Smile mamas."

I continued to hold the same face expression of how I'm feeling, which is not happy about this. I never really took pictures of my myself, let alone full body pictures. I just never felt comfortable doing that.

             "Thick ass." I hear him mumbled. "Smile bruh. Show them choppers." He mugged me and I busted out laughing, palming my forehead. I just did a random pose to get it over with.

"Happy now." I said as my cheeks burned from blushing while walking towards him. He was looking at his phone and then showed it to me. I looked at the picture he took and I got chills. It was a cute picture but my hips are so ughh. And my thighs. Look at my head. "Delete it."

"I'm straight." He typed away on his phone then put it in his pocket. My phone vibrated and I took it out seeing the message from him. I opened it and it was the picture of me. I smacked my lips, putting my phone away. I sat back on the comforter and opened a bag of gummy bears.

      I watched him as went into the duffle bag again and pulled out a basketball. He changed his shoes into some different shoes and he stood up. He held his hand out for me to take and I did, rising up.

He held my hand all the way to the large gym and released it. He opened the door for me and I thanked him and walked in, the cold breeze from the air conditioners hitting me, giving me chills.

It was a group of guys here on the other end of the court playing. I looked around, hearing loud laughing and there was a lot of girls here on the bleachers watching them. The people who I think is the staff, stood by a office door next to them.

The sound of the ball bouncing near me made me look at Anthony. I watched as he dribble the ball with ease behind him and between his legs. A smile slowly creeped on my face. "You finally letting me see you play?"

        "Consider it apart of yo gloday gift." He said shooting the ball. You hear the net as it wrapped against the ball, going through.

        "Apart of my gift? You getting me something?" I asked surprised. I didn't even think he remembered. No one really remembers  around those days is my birthday, just that it's thanksgiving. And now that I think of it, we have thanks giving break.

He caught the ball and begin dribbling it again. "Probably." He said, dribbling the ball around me.

I went to smack the ball out his hand but missed as he moved it out of my reach, still dribbling. "Stop reaching." He said, smirking.

I tried again and he literally dribbled circles around me each time I tried. He maneuvered around me, going to the basket and doing a lay up. I smacked my lips. "You not that good."

       "You Buggin'." He said shooting the ball in again.

        "READY TO GET YO ASS BEAT?" Someone yelled, making it echo through the gym. We turned around and it was Kev, Eli, and Mike with my girls walking in.

They walked over greeting us but I was confused on how they knew we was here. "Ten bands right now. You and E versus me and Mike." Kev said placing his hands on his knees.

"You sure?" E said folding his arms. "Played with Logan in Harlem you lost." He chuckles.

"See shut up, that's old. 10gs right now." He said all hyped.

"Well while y'all discuss that, Naeeeee!" Chilli said hugging me. I hugged them and we walked over to the bleachers behind the rim they playing at and sat down. "Love and basketball huh?" She smirked. I smacked my lips, rolling my eyes.

I missed my babies.

"Not even close." I chuckled. "How yall meet up with them?"

"Well Chilli and Mike was already together doing who knows what." Nicole said sipping from her ice tea Arizona, side eyeing her.

Chilli blushes and smacked her lips, rolling her eyes. "We smoked and got food dang. Nothing more. I even don't like him like that."

         "Yeah okayyyy." We laughed at us responding in sync. "This like the fourth time y'all run off somewhere together but okay." Chrissy said chuckling.

She waved us off, face redder than ever. "Says the one denying her true feelings for Eli but okayy! Same for you." She pointed at Nicole. Nicole face scrunched up, mouth hanging open.

"You and Kev have been chatting a lot for awhile way before we came back to the city, care to share anything about those conversations?" She squinted her eyes at her.

"Girl! We only talk when it's dealing with allllll of us. Don't play." Nicole said. I couldn't help but laugh at these girls of mine.

            "And everyone know the complications of me and Elijah so ha." Chrissy added. Chilli waved them off mugging.

"But anyways, we saw them at your house with Cam when we came to see you but you wasn't there. Kev said you was with Ghost so we can just came with them." She explained. "Guess Ghost is to come here."

I grew confused as to why they came to my house to talk to him. "What time did y'all come there?" I asked.

            "Three-three thirty, why?" She raised a brow.

I left around two so Kevin and Eli came exactly after I left or something? How long was they there? Like it makes no sense. And why would they just randomly come to my house to talk to him after all this time?

I was taken out of my thoughts as we looked at the boys as they yelled at each other. Eli had the ball under his arm and they all stood, arguing. "Bruh how is that out of bounds?!"

           "Nigga you can't be over the line and shoot!" Kev said.

           "Nigga I wasn't over the line! You just salty!" He laughed, bouncing the ball to Anthony. "In that case you elbowing me in my arm a foul too!"

"Bruh. G you saw that