For the thousandth time since I'd woken up, I checked the time on my phone. What the fuck were they doing? They should have been there already. Anxiously, I paced the room with my hands at my hips, my eyes fixed on the door.

"Andy, you're making my head spin. Come sit down," Michelle ordered. When I turned to her, she patted the space on the couch next to her, an inviting smile on her lips.

Hesitantly, I glimpsed at the door again. They would be here any time, now. Deciding I might as well sit and try to calm down while we waited, I went to the spot Shelly had invited me to. In a stroller next to us, little Amanda was peacefully napping, her tiny body wrapped into a yellow blanket.

Eva was also here with us, a fundamental part of our little welcoming committee. Lucy had made the trip from Denver too. While I wasn't sure it was a good idea, given her lack of involvement these past few months, it wasn't my place to come between her and her little brother. Both she and Eva were in the kitchen, talking together. On the counter next to them, all sorts of food were displayed, coming from the places Lex preferred. I'd ordered it all for him, thinking he might appreciate some decent food after being forced to eat so terribly for so long.

Kev was the one in charge of getting him back here. He'd gone to Sheridan early this morning, in anticipation of Lex's release. Four hours and eight minutes ago, he'd sent me a text to tell me they were on their way, and I'd been jittery ever since.

A suspicious noise came from the hallway outside, and I jumped on my feet again, as if mounted on springs. Shelly let out a soft laugh behind me, but I ignored her. Yes, I was overly excited, like a puppy about to see its favorite person again.

For nearly a month now, I hadn't seen Lex. All we'd had were phone calls, and these had grown scarcer lately. Seeing him again would be everything. And he'd be a free man.

I'd mended my mistakes, and while I'd forever regret putting him in this situation, I at least had the satisfaction to know I'd taken him out of it.

The noise turned out to be a false alarm, so I sat back with a disappointed pout. "Breathe, darling," Michelle told me, passing a hand over my back, soothing the fabric of my dress.

For the occasion, I had picked the cute black dress I'd worn on our first date together. It was very proper and lady-like, but I was certain Lex would like the small attention. For the first time in forever, I was looking feminine, with makeup, nice curls I'd paid attention to, and jewels. Waxing had also been part of the process, and I'd forgotten how enjoyable it was to have legs as smooth as a baby dolphin.

"So, how have you been doing?" Michelle asked, kindly offering me a distraction.

"Well, much better lately."

She chuckled, seeing how generic her question had been. "Did your month of leave do any good?"

Oh boy, it for sure had done a lot of good. I nodded with a thankful smile. "Thank you again for recommending me to your colleague. I really, really needed that time for myself."

"I'm glad I could help. Do you think you'll keep—"

Her question was interrupted by the sound of the doorbell resonating into the apartment. In a second, I was up again and rushed to the door. With my hands trembling with anticipation, I unlocked it and swung the panel open.

When my eyes fell onto him, a series of shivers ran into my entire body, nearly making me tremble from their intensity. He was here. He was really here.

The fact that he wasn't wearing a prison uniform, but a pair of jeans and a simple light gray T-shirt, was enough to send my heart humming with joy. His familiar eyes met mine, but I barely held his gaze, my eyes distracted by an unexpected feature. I'd noticed before that he was letting his facial hair grow, but he now had a full, two-month-old beard. Most of it was dark, but there were a few white strands over his chin area.

While it was slightly disturbing to see him like this, it was surprisingly hot. I'd never been into beards – except when it was on Captain America – but with Lex, it was fantasy-inducing. It might have been because I was obsessed with the man overall. The only thing I disliked about it was that it hid his sharp jawline. But the intense and serious look it gave him made up for it handsomely. Gazing back up, I let myself drown in his familiar irises, my body tingling and desperate to touch him.

Not holding back, I impulsively lunged forwards and wrapped my arms around his torso, plastering myself against him, pressing the side of my face against his solid chest. I'd missed him so fucking much.

A sense of homeliness flooded me as I held him, his familiar scent filling my nostrils. Against my ear, I could hear the regular and strong beat of his heart, and this too I'd missed greatly.

Lex. My Lex.

I was holding him again. He was right here.

He cleared his throat over my head, and I forced my arms to let go, looking up at his handsome face. Just like in his beard, there was now some white hair scattered on his temples. It hadn't been there before, and I wondered if the stress and hardship of his imprisonment were the reason for it.

Looking around, I noticed that everyone was staring at us, faint smiles on their faces. Fuck, he hadn't even gotten inside, and I was already monopolizing him. The others surely wanted to greet him, too.

I moved back to allow him and Kevin inside, and the latter offered me an indulging grin. One after the others, they all welcomed Lex back home, gave him hugs and friendly embraces. My eyes never let go of him the entire time, my heart so full of love and pride. My baby was out. He was back, and he would get better from now on. All the mess that had happened would become our past, and we had an entire future to look forward to.

Slowly, as he spoke to the others, I got accustomed to his presence again. Once my overexcitement settled down, I was able to notice things I hadn't perceived before. His body language was stiff, his gestures uneasy. For over two months now, he'd been building walls around himself and sheltering his entire person from the world, so his time in jail wouldn't damage him too much. It made sense that these invisible barriers would take some time to fall. He'd need to work on himself and to learn he could trust people again, that he didn't have to protect himself so fiercely. And I'd be here with him, every step of the way.

About five minutes after he'd arrived, we still hadn't exchanged a word; only a few glances. He needed space and while the others might not have caught on to that fact, I had, so I held back.

Lex managed to last about two more minutes, and then he gave in and asked what had probably been on the tip of his tongue since he'd first entered. "Can you all leave?"

His tone was rather neutral, but it was still a relatively rude request. They were all taken aback for a few seconds, but then remembered it wasn't against them. It was just the way Lex's mind worked. Adamant to respect his wishes, they didn't insist. Within a minute, they'd said their goodbyes, given more hugs, and were out of the apartment.

Once Lex and I were alone, the silence that fell around us became tense, charged with something heavy and undeniable. He gave me a darkened look, and something fluttered in my chest. "I ordered some food," I explained, gesturing toward the kitchen. "I didn't know what you'd want, so I—"

"I meant you as well, Andrea," he cut me dryly, turning his face away to stare at the wall next to him.

"You— What?"

"Leave."

Dread. Pure, unaltered dread invaded every single part of my mind and body. It filled me with a nauseating feeling, a heavy ball pressing down on my stomach. No, he couldn't mean it. He wasn't actually kicking me out. Not me.

"Lex, you just got back. Let's eat something, and then we'll talk."

"I mean it, Andrea. I want to be left the fuck alone right now," he insisted. The curse had me flinching, and my feet took a step back on their own. He still wasn't looking at me, his eyes stuck onto some invisible target on the wall.

What the hell was wrong with him?

"I'm staying. Now that you're back, I'm not just going to leave," I argued, determined to win this one.

He turned to me with something dangerous in his eyes, and it made my skin crawl. I'd never been this intimidated by him, this scared by what he might do. He took a few steps toward me, and with each of them, I had to fight the urge to take one back. When he stopped, he was so close to me I could feel the warmth of his warm body tease my skin. I wanted to enjoy it, to cherish having him so close again, but everything in his attitude was aggressive. He was struggling to contain his anger, and all of it was targeted at me.

"I've been surrounded by people for ten weeks. Right now, all I want is to be alone. Or can't you even respect that?"

The coldness of his tone and the harshness of his words felt like a stab through the chest. It emptied my lungs at once and spread an aching pain that started from my heart to travel in my whole body. He'd never seemed so dangerous before, and I wasn't sure if it was because of the beard, or because he'd never glared at me with so much rancor in the past.

Why was he being like this?

"Lex, whatever is going on, we need to talk about it."

"I can't handle you right now, Andrea. I need more time, or I'll do something we'll both regret."

He was pissed at me. No, I could handle pissed. After what I'd done, I'd even expected him to be pissed at me. But this was pure wrath. This was him trying his hardest not to explode, because every cell in his body was furious at me.

"Lex, I didn't do anything you wouldn't have done for me," I tried with a trembling voice. Tears pooled in my eyes, no matter how hard I tried to contain them. I was too sleep-deprived for this, too emotionally unstable to handle his temper.

If I'd thought he was angry before, it was nothing compared to what my words had unleashed.

"No, don't play this card with me. You can't reverse the situations to justify what you did, Andrea," he groaned, barely a foot away from me. "If the roles had been reversed, I would have known what the fuck I was doing, because I've been doing it for over thirteen years. But you knew nothing about it, so you took inconsiderate risks. You also knew I would be strongly opposed to it, and you still did it. I was stuck in there, worried sick as I wondered every fucking hour what you would do, unable to do anything to stop you, unable to make you see reason. You abused my position of weakness to go behind my back and pull this shit."

"I knew what I was doing," I protested, struggling to not let his words get to me too hard. A tear ran down my cheek, and I wiped it away.

"Had you hacked into anything before?"

I opened my mouth to protest, but closed it again, making my teeth snap together harshly.

"That's what I thought. Now, do you have any idea how infuriating this is? I would do anything, anything, to protect you. I was ready to go to fucking prison if it meant you wouldn't get involved. And then you go and do something that could send you there for the rest of your life."

"It wasn't like that. I had help. I wouldn't ever have done it if I wasn't sure I could."

"Who helped you?"

"Oli and... Deathbringer."

"So not only did you take risks, but you also brought two people with you in your mad enterprise?"

"Do you have so little faith in me, Lex?" I asked, properly insulted by his lack of confidence in my abilities. The sadness I'd felt switched into something else, and it was my turn to be angry.

Exasperated, he pinched the bridge of his nose, taking a deep breath to calm himself down. It barely worked, and when his eyes fell on me again, he was still fuming. "I can't do this right now. I need more time until we can talk about it calmly. So, please Andrea, leave."

"I'm not fucking leaving, Lex. Do you have any idea how humiliating it would be for me? You're barely out, and all I get to do is spend half an hour with you before you kick me out? That's so insulting."

My statement annoyed him some more, but I held strong, giving him a fierce scowl. I hadn't spent the last five weeks getting him out to just surrender without a fight.

To my great satisfaction, he gave up, clenching his jaw and looking away. I couldn't see it because of the beard, but I knew the muscles at the edge of his jaw were tightly flexed. "Then do whatever the fuck you want," he declared, heading for the secret door. "Mary, open the door."

The painting opened, and I watched Lex disappear into the small room I'd spent countless hours in. It closed behind him, and I kept staring at it, my mood slowly calming down.

Part of me was mad at him for what had just happened, but another part understood where he came from. He was still in self-protection mode, and his good sense was often unreachable when he got like this. All he needed was some time, and then he'd be able to see I hadn't had a choice. He'd see what I'd done was the best thing I could, and I hadn't blindly taken risks just to free him.

I'd always known he'd be mad at me, and had even prepared myself for it. Maybe I hadn't expected that much anger and resentment, yes. But he'd get over it, eventually. All we needed was time. And we had an endless supply of it.

Still, rationalizing everything didn't help with the sour aftertaste our conversation had left behind. With a sigh, I pulled my necklace out from under my dress and passed it over my head. On it, I'd slipped the ring Lex had gotten for me, the one he never got to offer but I'd still claimed as my own. I took it out of the chain before spilling it back on my finger. Where it belonged. Lex might be mad at me right now, this was what we really were. This was our destination, this was what we were meant to be.

Wearing it again gave me back some of my confidence and the strength I needed to get over what had just happened. I'd only removed it because I didn't want the others to ask questions about it, since I didn't know what answers I'd give them. "Yes, Lex had planned to ask, but I don't know where we stand right now," was rather embarrassing to say.

Because it was well past lunchtime, I headed to the counter and picked a box full of sushi. With a pair of chopsticks and something to pour the sauce into, I headed to the living room to sit on the couch. From there, sitting cross-legged on the cushion, I wouldn't miss Lex if he came out of his cave. He was like a wild animal right now, unpredictable and explosive, but I'd tame him back to being my loving and comprehensive boyfriend.

By the time I finished the sushi, he still hadn't come out, so I remained in my strategic position and mindlessly busied myself on my phone. I was in dire need of a distraction when Death messaged me.

"Okay, so he's mad mad."

"Is he talking to you?" I sent back.

"Yeah, but I'm pretty sure he's actually yelling at me, even if he's not using all caps."

"I'm sorry I dragged you into this. I didn't think he'd get this furious."

"Are you mixing your facts, Andy broccoli? I dragged myself into this. And he can be mad at me all he wants, he can't do shit to me. I'm more sorry for you. Your kitty is going to suffer when all his anger morphs into want."

Although it wasn't really healthy, the thought had something throb low in my stomach. I'd been deprived of pleasure for so long, I was craving some release. Now that Lex was back, it was rather clear I'd get some again. It was very uncertain when, although it was still somewhere in my future. But as it was, I could hardly see how we'd engage in any form of sexual activity. First, we needed to mend things, and then we'd fall into his bed again.

Fuck, the mere thought had me warming up. And with that beard, it would be like a brand new experience. When he ate me out, would it tick—

My naughty thoughts were cut short when the panel opened in front of me. Silently, I observed him as he came out, noticing his slight surprise when he found me right there. Had he thought I would have left?

After a vague glimpse at me, he averted his eyes and headed for the kitchen. He shuffled through the various boxes, assessing his options. He settled on a poké bowl, grabbed a fork, and headed back to his clandestine office. As he was almost there, he hesitated, standing still for a few seconds. Going back in his tracks, he grabbed a couple more boxes with him and returned to the secret door.

"Bon appétit," I told him in a clear voice.

It was barely audible, but a faint "Thanks" came back to me, right before he locked himself in there again.

It wasn't much, but it was something. All I needed was to be patient, and Lex would eventually forgive me. Given enough time, all wounds could heal.

And for that man, I'd wait a lifetime.