Chapter 41

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Almost 250 comments on a chapter I posted an hour ago? What the fuck is wrong with y'all? Don't you have lives??

Kidding, of course, unless my biggest fan Chris Bright is reading this, in which case I know you don't have a life. Also, fuck you.

Anyhoo, y'all are killing me with the comments so I just had to post again LMAO.

Killian

Two weeks without Katrina.

Two weeks of sleeping alone, or rather, not sleeping.

Her words tormented me at night, replaying on a constant loop, but at least they were better than remembering the nice things she said to me, few as they were.

I'm safest when I'm with you.

But apparently, she didn't value safety as much as she hated me.

I could never love you, Killian.

So decisive when she said it, said it as easily as she had rejected her actual mate. Both times, no hesitation, just cruel, concise words.

I knew she was damaged, sure. Knew she would be damaged for a long time after finding out about her mate and her sister. But I was supposed to help. She wasn't supposed to stay like that forever.

When we danced at the Mating Gathering, I promised her that I would make her happy again. I would have done anything—anything to keep that promise.

And I thought she was making progress. She didn't have any more nightmares, she was laughing more, smiling more, with me. I thought once I came back from saving the wolves, things were going to change between us, I thought she realized she fell in love with me. She clutched me so tightly that night, if she was not so weak, and I was not an Alpha, she would have left bruises on my skin.

But it was all a lie.

You never know people as well as you think.

I don't want you. I never will.

She had kissed me back! Kissed me back before those cold words slipped out of her lips so effortlessly.

If things were different, our first kiss would have been better. I was rough, I know that, felt guilty for that, guilty for not being able to control my wolf. But if I'm being honest, it was just as much me as it was my wolf. I had wanted to kiss her since the first time I saw her and she glowered at me before even saying a word.

I should have known, should have listened all of those times she told me she hated me. I thought it was her way of protecting herself, of making sure her heart wasn't crushed like it was after Leo.

But I wouldn't have hurt her, not ever. I would have treated her better than Leo ever could have. I would have mended her heart, and we would have been happy together. I would have been her silence.

She would have been an amazing Luna.

Told her I would have made her my Luna, and it hadn't swayed her in the slightest. No, she never cared about power. Apparently, didn't care about me either.

All of the times I caught her staring at me, laughing at something I said, all of the times she would sigh contently when I would stroke her hair, I was just deluding myself into believing a false reality.

It was convenient.

And she hadn't even known that I was in love with her, so in love with her it consumed me, distorted my thoughts, ruined me.

But it didn't matter.

Because like she said, she would never love me back.

Knox's voice interrupts the constant loop of Katrina. Killian, we found an envelope on the outside of our territory. It smells like Dorian.

What does it say? I respond back irately, in a foul mood, have been in a foul mood since she left two weeks ago without looking back.

It says on the outside for your eyes only, Knox responds back hesitantly. Are you sure you want me to read it?

I pause. What the fuck does that bloodsucker want now? Probably to see Katrina. Fucking leach couldn't take his eyes off of her. If only he knew how cruel she was, perhaps he wouldn't feel the same way about her.

But probably not. Gods know watching her reject Leo callously, without batting a single eyelash solidified my obsession with her.

Where are you? I ask Knox.

Once he gives me his location, I teleport to him instantly. He holds out an envelope, and I tear it open haphazardly, already ready to teleport to Dorian's and rip his head off, regardless of the contents inside the letter. Perhaps I would do the same to Leo next.

For the first time in two weeks, I almost smile just picturing his head rolling across the ground.

Killlian,

I don't know how to say this except to just say it.

Katrina is dying.

I reread that sentence over and over in disbelief, my heart sinking, but I force myself to read on.

I don't know the details, just something about the Curse of the Seer. The Curse makes her Sight slowly kill her, and she's been dying since the day I met her, since the day she was born.

She made me promise not to tell you. I was hoping she would have told you on her own. But since she hasn't, she left me no choice.

She doesn't have much time left.

You deserve to know. To say goodbye.

I'm sorry, Killian. You have no idea how sorry I am.

Dorian

I read the letter through five times, and it still doesn't sink in.

Until everything suddenly snaps into place.

Why Katrina has only gotten weaker and weaker since she's been here, why she went unconscious for longer and longer periods of time after a vision, why she bleeds so much.

I knew something was wrong. Let her convince me nothing was, because I never imagined that she would have lied to me, not about something like that.

I had trusted her too much, and it nearly destroyed us.

No, no, she couldn't be dying.

I have to see her.

Without saying anything to Knox, I teleport right into Leo's office in Blue Moon.

He jumps in surprise. "Killian, what-"

"Where is she?" I snarl.

"Where is who?" he asks in confusion.

"Don't fucking waste my time," I snarl, and I'm one second away from ripping his fucking head off. "Where is Katrina?"

His face twists. "Killian, I have no idea what you're talking about. Katrina isn't here."

No, no, she had to be. She told me that Gwen-

Gwen walks into the office. "Killian, what are you doing here?" She looks just as confused as Leo.

"Katrina," I say gutturally. "Did you get her from Iron Claw?"

More confusion from Gwen. "What are you talking about? Why would I have gotten her? We haven't talked since-" She cuts herself off. Since the day I threatened to declare war on Blue Moon.

She lied. Lied again. Has been lying to me since the day I took her from Iron Claw.

Without saying another word to the bastard Alpha and Luna of Blue Moon, I teleport to Katrina's shitty small house.

It doesn't take long to realize she isn't here, either.

Based on how stale her scent is, she hasn't been here for a while. Likely, she left shortly after I took her back here.

"Fuck!" I yell angrily.

I teleport into the office of the Alpha of Iron Claw.

Cole jumps in surprise. "Alpha Killian! What are you doing here?"

"Katrina," I growl. I couldn't control my wolf if I tried. "Where is she?"

He looks just as confused as Leo had. "I-I don't know," he stammers out, his fear palpable.

"One of your wolves is missing and you didn't even notice?" I practically shout, unable to conceal my anger. Nobody here cared about Katrina, not like she was cared for in Crimson Shadow.

How could they not see it? How could they not see what a treasure she is, how precious she is in every way? I had known it from my first interaction with her in the office of the Blood Lake Pack House, told her it because it is the one thing I know to be absolutely certain.

"She... I thought she was with you?" he says in confusion, his heart racing. "I didn't know you returned her."

Fucking Katrina.

She may be precious to me, but she's also a liar inside and out, and a good one at that.

I never even suspected that she was. Or maybe I had, but allowed myself to believe what I wanted to hear. Believe that she was okay, that she was healthy.

But she was dying. Dying right under my nose the whole time.

And now I have no idea where she is.

Obviously, I had known that I would come back for her. And I would have. If she had stayed away a little longer, I would have chased after her. I wouldn't have cared if I had to pull a Cain and keep her as my prisoner, she would have been mine.

Cain.

You know how many people owe me favors?

Ares.

"Alpha-" Cole begins to say, but I disappear.

And land in the entrance of the Blood Lake Pack House.

The same entrance I watched her reject Leo in. Decided then and there that I would stop at nothing to have her. If she had accepted Leo as her mate, I would have been able to stop my obsession, would never have claimed my spoil of war.

But she didn't.

"Get out."

Snapped out of my memories, I look and see the Blood Luna, holding a small baby wrapped in a fur pelt in her arms.

"Where is Katrina?" I snarl.

"Not here." Ares doesn't even blink. A natural liar, just like my Katrina.

"I will tear apart this entire house if I have to," I say lowly. "I know she's here."

"Get out of my fucking house, Killian," Cain suddenly puts himself in between me and his mate. Perhaps he knows that I would kill her without a second thought if she continued to hide my Katrina from me.

"I can't do that. I need to see her, Cain," I speak calmly, but there's no mistaking the threat in my words.

"She doesn't want to see you," Cain snarls. Unlike his mate, he is no liar, always addressing things directly. "Get out. The girl is under our protection."

I shrug.

I open a portal in Ares' arms, and in an instant, I'm holding her pup.

Ares screams, and Cain's hands erupt in fire.

"Now, now, Cain," I say calmly, and rock his pup in my arms. "You wouldn't want to burn your pup on accident, would you? What did my darling Katrina say about him? He freezes things, no? I don't think he would be able to protect himself against your fire right now, I'm afraid."

I continue rocking the pup, who's still sleeping soundly. Cain glowers at me, while Ares summons a knife. So predictable. So Ares.

"Tell me where Katrina is, or I send your pup to an island far away where you can never find him," I threaten. And I mean it. Moral, I am not, as my Katrina once told me. "How long can babies live without being fed, I wonder?" I muse, still rocking the pup.

"Third floor, second door on the right," Ares whispers, her face white.

"Hold your arms out," I instruct her, and she does. I teleport the baby into her arms, though I can imagine that he'll feel quite sick from the in between when he wakes up. I don't care.

I teleport into the room.

Katrina is awake, but she can't see me, never could See me.

Her skin has a grey hue and her face is hollowed, her bones jagged and popping out awkwardly. Blood drips down her eyes, nose, and out of her mouth. On the floor next to her, there's a bucket filled halfway with her blood.

I fall to my knees.

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