34 - When It Rains

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The sky above darkened and grey clouds filled it. I let out a nervous breath, quickening my steps so I wouldn't lose John. We'd entered the neighbourhood.

I kept my eyes forward as I passed the residents, who looked normal enough if you ignored the nasty glares they sent you way. I stepped out of the way of a broken bottle, resisting the urge to run away.

Up ahead I saw John glance around before taking a left into an alleyway. I jogged slightly, pulling my hood tight over my head. My heart was pounding. I stopped at the entrance of the alleyway.

I made out his tall figure with two other guys further in. I spotted a large garbage disposal I could hide behind and quietly walked towards it and crouched.

Peeking forward, I could make out who John was with. Cyrus and Ian.

I was relived. They didn't seem too dangerous. That's what I thought until I saw the look on Cyrus's face. It was murderous. I quickly leaned back, trying to breathe quietly and listen.

"You thought you could take a vacation when you got business to deal with?" Cyrus's voice boomed around us.

"It wasn't a vacation." John responded, his voice lacking strength. He sounded defeated. "I just had to get away."

"You can't just 'get away' when you feel like it." Cyrus responded sharply. "Especially with no warning. Cos that looks like you're running away."

John didn't say anything.

"Were you running away?" Ian asked, his voice as velvety as honey. Welcoming. But I wasn't fooled.

"Nah," John answered but he didn't sound sure. "I just needed to get my head in order, so I could finish what I had to."

Cyrus scoffed. "Uh huh, and that's why you dipped at that shopping mall when one of my boys saw you?"

John sighed. "Okay, yeah I was trying to avoid you guys. But not permanently, just a couple weeks. It's been tough for me-"

"Aw, I'm John and my life is rough cos my dad left, my mum is mean to me and the love of my life doesn't love me back." Cyrus mocked in a high-pitched voice. I frowned, who was the love of his life?

Cyrus's tone turned menacing. "Man the fuck up, Allen. Your problems are nothing compared to ours, yet we don't run away like pussies. We do what we need to do to survive."

I couldn't see Cyrus expression and I was glad. "You got two parents still walking on this earth; it's just my brother and me, and Ian with his psycho mum. We've had to grind to get to where we are, and I'm not about to lose it cos of some pretty boy with daddy issues."

I let out a breath. Damn.

There was a tense silence until Ian spoke up. "My mum ain't psycho. She's worse. Yours is Heaven compared to mine, Allen. But they're both messed up. I understand you man, we're your friends. Cyrus is pissed cos it seemed like you threw all our help back in our faces. But I know you're better than that, yeah? Talk to us, what's happening with this bet?"

My stomach turned at the words and I frowned. Bet?

I heard John's feet shuffle. He let out a breath. "I can't do it anymore."

I jumped when someone kicked the garbage disposal I was behind. "I told you, Ian! I fucking told you!" Cyrus shouted furiously.

"If you can't get easy revenge, if you can't do something as simple as breaking Chloe's heart, how will you survive on Taro's ambush?" Cyrus asked in a low tone.

His words registered in my head and I froze.

The world around me muted, only muffled sounds reaching my ears. My hands shakily clutched at my chest which was barely containing my pounding heart.

John... My best friend... Wanted to break my heart?

"John, are you sure about this?" Ian's smooth voice cut through the fog of confusion and hurt surrounding me.

"Don't you remember what she did to you, John?" I forced myself to pay attention. "She abandoned you without a second glance. She doesn't care about you, John. You shouldn't care about her."

Liar! I wanted to scream.

"She told me she loved me, Ian." John said in a feeble voice.

"Actions speak louder than words, Allen. If she loved you why would she leave? You either end her or yourself." Cyrus cut in firmly. His voice sent shivers down my spine.

I was wrong. They were dangerous.

"Cyrus, I want to, b-but I can't! You don't get it, what she's been through, I can't hurt her." John exclaimed resolutely.

You already have.

There was a pause. Somehow, the silence was more terrifying.

"Can't, or won't?" Cyrus asked. I couldn't make out any emotion in his voice. That scared me.

"Won't." John stated.

My fists clenched. The anger and hurt I felt was indescribable. They didn't need to tell me exactly what the bet was for me to figure it out.

They bet if John could break my heart.

Mission successful. I thought to myself, wiping tears from my face. Only John could make me plummet to the ground after I felt like I was walking on air.

Cyrus sighing brought me out of my thoughts. "I didn't want this to happen, Allen. I really didn't, I hope you remember that. You won't be coming back from this ambush."

My heart dropped.

"You have two weeks to carry out the bet if you change your mind." Ian cut in. "Which is just before the Christmas holidays. The ambush is on the 24th of December. If you want to see next year, you'll do the right thing."

"I am doing the right thing."

"Right for who?" Ian asked softly. "For Chloe or you? She doesn't deserve this kindness, Allen. This bet isn't revenge, its justice."

"You're right." John said and I tensed. "She doesn't deserve only kindness, she deserves the world."

With that John started walking off. I watched him go with betrayal on my face, my fists clenched.

I looked up when I felt a raindrop on my cheek. The sky looked dark and menacing, grey clouds covering any source of light.

"You're a dead man walking, Allen!" Cyrus called after John.

"I have been for a long time." John shouted back, pulling his hood up.

I stayed crouched, too scared and shocked to move. I heard Ian sigh.

"We tried our best man; he just can't go through with it." Ian told Cyrus.

"He's a little shit, but I care for the guy." Cyrus said, sounding disappointed. "He could have been a valuable asset. Shame he had to be stupid. Shouldn't have come up with the bet in the first place."

So John came up with the bet himself?

Ian chuckled. "It was impossible for him not too. The guy is too unstable, all cos of one chick. I could never let anyone have power over me like that."

"Same," Cyrus agreed, and then paused. "Don't look at me like that; Maisie has no power over me. I barely care for her."

"Uh huh." Ian teased, and then sighed. "I'm gonna miss the guy."

What scared me most about the conversation was how they were talking. As if his funeral was in a day. They genuinely had no hope he could survive the ambush. If they didn't, how could I?

"Allen's an odd one, though." Cyrus mused and they started walking, appearing in my line of vision. "He was so easy to manipulate at first. Then he seemed to form his own resolve. I wonder where it came from."

Ian shrugged. "Maybe he does really love Chloe."

Cyrus shook his head. "Nah man, that's not love. If it is, then Chloe's screwed."

With that they walked off. I watched them with blurry eyes, only seeing indiscernible black figures.

I stood up, clutching at my chest desperately as it heaved. I tried my hardest to breathe but the air around me was sucked away. I felt like I was trapped in the alleyway, the filthy walls closing on me.

More rain splattered on me viciously, drenching me. I placed a hand on the wall, leaning on it for support. Salty tears and raindrops ran down my face as I sobbed in panic and hurt.

I hadn't meant to hurt John. I didn't want to leave him, I had no choice. Would it have helped if I'd told him I was going?

Possibly. But was that an excuse for him to resent me so much? Everything he'd said up to this point, every reassurance was a lie.

What hurt most wasn't the lies, or deceit.

It was the fact that after everything I'd discovered, I still loved John. I still saw him as the shy boy with a crooked smile and diamonds for eyes.

I saw my best friend who comforted me when my sister first went to college, leaving me feeling utterly alone. Another person in my family gone.

I saw him as my partner in crime, someone I went to for any crazy schemes of mine.

I saw him as the boy who was my first crush, and first kiss.

My love for him was unchanged, pure, but his love for me was conditional and corrupt.

A confirmation that I could never be loved truly after Dave. That I was damaged and unworthy.

And that hurt the most.

******

1) Should Chloe confront John?

2) What should John do? Go on the ambush or go through with the bet?

3) Have you ever been betrayed by a friend like that?

4) Would you be interested in a story for Ian/Cyrus? Or both? They're such interesting characters to me.


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