Blake picked the place we could talk, and it was a Greek restaurant by the city lake. During summer, it was always busy and people had to make a reservation to get a table, but not during the wintry days. Everyone would love to be home and hide under their blanket in this temperature. Plus, there was almost no view outside the window after four, except for the dark lake and the pitch-black sky. But it didn't matter to me because I wasn't here for the panorama.

I held my breath when Blake entered the restaurant. He looked tall, dark, and handsome in his navy blue suit, the color of his eyes, striding to my table with confidence. His hair was neatly gelled and pulled in a slick style, which made me wonder if he was dressed up for our meet up.

My heart skipped a beat when he smiled at me. "Did I make you wait long?"

"No, not at all," I replied, shaking my head. "I was early."

"You look gorgeous," he said after taking the seat across from me.

"Thank you. And likewise, you look handsome." I glanced down at my green shirt dress. "I feel underdressed now."

"Don't be. You look pretty in whatever garment you choose, anyway." I would count it as a courtesy line if it wasn't Blake who said it. No matter how sad our history was, he was not a bullshitter with giving compliments.

We ordered our meals and talked about superficial topics except for the main reason for our meet up. Maybe it was just a habit, or I just wanted to enjoy my last moment with him before I told him my decision. At least, this was not as painful as when I said goodbye for the first time.

"I didn't know you were still doing your consultant business," I said during our meals. It made me realize how little we talked during the wedding week, and how little I knew about his current life. Maybe I unconsciously blocked myself from knowing more, to protect myself.

"I built it from scratch. Do you think I would drop it for my father's family business?" He shook his head. "Not a chance. And he agreed I would still run my business. Well, now I have someone who is in charge, but basically, we run it together."

"I suppose I don't know the person."

"You do."

"Oh? It's not Watson, right?"

"No, hell no. That man is dead to me. But I understand why he did what he did. He had too much going on back in the day, and he needed the money. Something I couldn't offer him."

"I wouldn't even try to understand, really," I said. "A friend wouldn't do the thing he did to you. I heard money is the accurate test of whether someone is truly your friend."

"Yeah, I agree." He glanced up at me while cutting his skirt steak. "So, Thomas is now in charge of Strategy Works Consulting. His family is also from around here."

"Ah, yeah, I remember him." He started up the consultancy business with Blake back when I was still in uni, but he stepped back to take care of his dying parents.

"He's married now and had their first baby last summer. His wife, Liza, is his high school sweetheart, who was also his childhood neighbor."

I chuckled. "That's convenient."

"I can't blame him. Sometimes we just keep coming back to the best thing life has offered us."

"So, Strategy Works Consulting, huh," I said, dodging the dangerous topic. I'm not ready to go there yet. "When did you change your company's name?"

"Not long after you...we broke up. The old name had Watson's name in it, and since I thrive in a wider field, I decided to change it completely. With that, I could beat him, market-wise."

"Good move."

"He might want to be specialized in assessment, but on the other hand, he's limiting himself; something I always disagreed with him in the past. I was honestly lucky when Thomas contacted me again, and we worked our asses off to break into the market." He smiled at me, but it contrasted with the sad glint in his eyes. "Besides, I was a single and broken man who put all his life into work. After you left, my company was all I had."

The topic had completely shifted now, and I lost my appetite all of a sudden. I picked up my napkin and slowly dabbed it on my lips. "So, it was a good thing that I left."

"I wouldn't put it that way, but it was the best decision for you, I suppose."

I tilted my head, eyeing him eating his last piece of meat. "What do you mean?"

After he swallowed, he put down his cutlery and gave me his full attention. "As you can see, before we broke up, I was at my lowest point in my life. What I had built for years crumbled in my hands, and I didn't know how to put it back together. It took a toll on me and on us because I couldn't share it with you. I was shutting myself up, and I was in fear of losing everything, especially you.

"You weren't happy about it, but I convinced myself that we just needed to wait a little longer until everything fell into place. But I wasn't aware of how much pain I put you through." He shook his head and sighed. "When I saw you that afternoon on the hill, I knew I ran out of time. You wanted out, and I couldn't make you stay because, frankly, I didn't know what it was going to be. It wasn't fair to you."

My chest tightened at his side of the story. Looking back four years ago, I couldn't see how it was from his point of view because I was also surviving. I was hanging on a very thin rope on a cliff with no safety net underneath. I had to make a quick decision to save myself from falling and hitting rock bottom.

"All I asked was for you to open up more to me, Blake. I wasn't with you because you were a successful man. I wanted you as you. You should have seen it by then."

"I should, but my insecurity prevented me from seeing that. I was a failure; that was all I knew. And I wasn't supposed to drag you down ‌even though the break-up threw me off balance for a fucking long time."

"I'm sorry for not being able to see how much you needed me back then."

"No, don't be. It wasn't your fault. I acted like a tough guy when I was far from it. If anything," he said, leaning in and placing his hand on the table. Our hands were now inches apart, but I awkwardly pulled mine away and pretended to tuck my hair behind my ear. "If anything, I was the one who made a stupid mistake by letting you go. I should, at least, try to find you again after a few months."

"Why didn't you?" My voice sounded like a whisper. I kept my eyes on his hand, which was now making a fist, as the need to touch him slowly grew inside me. Maybe I shouldn't have pulled my hand away and let our hands connect.

"Because I was a chicken. I had nothing to offer, Jennifer, and meanwhile, you were becoming a rising star. I was such an insecure mess." He leaned back in his chair. "And I learned from Lea that you didn't want to have anything to do with me. She also warned me if I ever contacted you, she would cut my balls."

"She said that?" I gasped.

"Yep." He nodded. "And she was serious. She was very overprotective of you."

"Sounds like her."

The waiter stopped at our table to check if everything was going well with our meal. His golden vest blinks against the amber light on the blue ceiling as he spoke. After being satisfied with our replies, he left our table with a small bow.

"I learned from her too that you started seeing someone, I mean all those dudes before Noah, and you were moving on," Blake continued, pursing his lips. "And all I had was work, work, work, until my dad raised a white flag, wanting to make peace with me. Long story short, I agreed to help him, and you know the rest."

The period between our break-up and the day I bumped into him in Noah's gathering was like a big black hole in my life. I had no idea how I survived those years, but I knew from the start I had to obliterate him from my life to keep going. His name or any news related to him had become a taboo topic. He was a forgotten history to me.

Silently, I watched him drink the rest of his red wine. Unlike the broken guy I left four years ago, he looked confident and dangerous now, as if he had the world in the palm of his hand; the Blake I met for the first time. He felt different, yet familiar to me. Four years wasn't a short time. A lot must have happened to him and changed him, but he was still the same man; the person who was very close to my heart.

Stop there, Jenny.

I sighed and grabbed my water glass before gulping the rest of it. "I told Noah."

Blake raised an eyebrow. "Oh, and?"

"I was truthful to him, but he didn't take it well."

"I'm sorry," he said, but a slightly giddy smile rose on the corner of his lips. "So, does it mean...you and I–"

I shook my head. "I'm leaving this city, Blake."

His smile stopped, replaced by a confused glint. "Leaving? To where?"

"I got promoted at work. It's a managerial position at one of our sister companies, and it's in the other region."

"Oh, wow. Congratulations," he said, but the utter shock was still visible in his eyes. "So, you're...moving away?"

"Thank you. And yes. It happened so fast, and I can't believe I'll start with my new role next week."

"Next week!" His voice sounded more like a squeak, then he cleared his throat. "I'm happy for you, Jennifer. You deserve it."

I smiled at him. Despite being taken by surprise, he looked sincerely happy for me. "Thank you."

"I..." he paused and frowned. "I wonder if you knew about this new position at Gary's wedding?"

"Yeah, I did."

"Why didn't you tell me?"

"Because I wasn't sure about it yet."

Obviously, my reply hit him hard. It got him speechless for a while, and he frowned at his empty plate as his lips formed a thin line. I wish I knew what was going on in his mind right now. Was he not happy I was keeping information from him? Did he think I was playing him?

I swallowed an imaginary lump in my throat. If breaking the news to Noah made me feel guilty, this goodbye gave me a completely different effect. I couldn't get rid of the heaviness in my chest and the constant doubt in my mind. But I had to focus. "I should probably have let you know a few weeks ago when I signed the document." But I didn't or he would talk me out of this. "I'm sorry."

"I really didn't expect this," he said after he could find his voice. "You took the offer after I asked you to give me another chance. Was I the reason for your decision?"

"No," I replied, a bit too fast. This talk had to end now because I could feel my determination crumbling layer by layer. Because I began to like the idea of sitting here and talking to him like the old times, especially after hearing his confession about what happened in the past few years. I wanted to know more about his life, his passion, his dreams... But it was too late.

I signed the offer, my ticket was issued, and my bags were packed. If I bailed now, it would create the ultimate mess. Plus, Blake was not off the hook since his family was depending on him.

"It's my decision. I wanted to take on this new challenge," I said.

"I know it's selfish to ask you this. But is there a way I can change your mind? Anything?" he asked, his eyes searching. "I would do anything if you let me."

"Blake–"

"You can't say you don't feel the same, Jennifer. We still have feelings for each other, and it's not just a stupid crush on the vacation. This is real."

It took everything in me to not agree with him, and absurd ideas flashed in my mind. What if I threw my career out of the window and stayed for him instead? I could find another job if my company wasn't happy with my last-minute cancellation. But what about his family? Would it kill his father on the spot? Would it jeopardize her brothers' future? Could I live with it if everyone had to pay for my careless decision?

"Please don't do this," I said, unable to look him straight in the eye.

"We can do long distance one more time. We failed before, but this time, we're going to do it right," he kept pushing.

I blinked and looked up at him. "You're not serious, right?"

"I've never been more serious than this, Jennifer," he said. "We'll take this slowly if you like. We will give each other plenty of space to think and to get used to each other again. I'll come to you whenever I can. And I will be right here when they transfer you back to the headquarters."

"When I'm back, everything will be different. You will change, and so will I." I closed my eyes and shivered as my head played a scene of his wedding with Kendall. "The long-distance was a wild idea, but I don't think it'll work. You have your family to focus on. As you said, the twins are the important people you need to take care of right now. And you have your consultancy business, too. I won't fit into your busy schedules."

His expression switched from hopeful to confused, then it turned harder. "What kind of bullshit are you trying to shove into my face? Why wouldn't I be able to fit you into my schedule? You're not my business partner. You're more important than that!"

"Let's end the discussion here, please," I replied, feeling the growing dizziness from the talk. I needed to get out of here. "I'm glad we crossed paths again, and that I got a bit of closure about what happened in the past. But this" — I pointed at him and me — "us will not happen. And this is for the best."