Believe me when I tell you this was a hard chapter to write. Comment and Vote, I'll be posting part II within a week.

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When lunch rolls around I meet up with Dean in the hallway so we can discuss what's going on. "What did you want to talk about?" I ask.

Dean paces back and forth as he begins, "Okay well last night my mom called and asked what I was doing for Christmas. I told him I was most likely spending Christmas with you and she was asking all about you. I told her about us. She knows that we're engaged and she wants us to go visit her before Christmas." He suddenly stops pacing as he walks up to me, "I haven't seen her in years Liv, please you have to come with me." He wants me to go to California with him to see his mom?

I feel like the rock I've been trapped under just got a little heavier. Dean looks so nervous as he waits for my answer. So I reply, "I don't know if my parents would even let me go." It's a lie, they'd let me do pretty much anything especially with Dean.

Dean half smiles, "I can convince them, please Liv?"

I can't say no, I know that. "Yeah, okay." I agree and watch the excitement spread across his face. He then does something he hasn't done in a very long time...he hugs me. I feel weird, like this is so foreign for him to do.

When he pulls away his excitement is still all the way there, "Okay, I love you." He says before hugging me again. I don't know what else to do but hug him back.

Tuesday

"Alright guys, since midterms are this Friday we're going to spend the next two days reviewing the semester. As for today I figured we could spend it picking out your colleges and sending in applications. If you've already done this or don't plan on going to college then congratulations you get a free day. Everyone else come get a laptop from the cart." Mr. Morgan informs the class and the majority of us stand up to grab a laptop.

When I get back to my desk and power up the laptop Dean comes up to me. "I've already applied to Stanford so I guess we get a free period." He gloats, sitting in the chair beside me.

I continue to log into my computer and pull up schools in New York. It's always been my dream to go to NYU, even if it's not Dean's.

Still, he seems confused as he watches me, "Why are you looking up colleges there, we're going to California? You probably won't get into Stanford but there are decent schools near by or online."

Before I can respond Mr. Morgan walks up to us, he leans in behind me as he looks at my screen. "NYU is a good school, what do you want to study?" He asks.

I'm surprised that he's genuinely interested in where I want to go. "Journalism." I say.

He nods, "Well an out of state school is very expensive but if you get enough grants and scholarships you should be fine."

Dean decides to cut in, "She's not going to NYU."

I don't respond or try to elaborate on what Dean said. Still, Mr. Morgan decides to pry, "Why not?" He doesn't direct that to me he directs it to Dean.

"She's coming with me to California. I'm going to Stanford." Dean doesn't stop there, "In fact we're going down next week to check out the schools."

To anyone else Mr. Morgan looks as calm as ever. To me he's shocked, I haven't exactly told him yet. "I don't know, I might want to at least apply at NYU so see if I could get in?" The look that Dean gives me is unnerving, like I just said the most unreasonable thing ever.

"I think that's a good idea, Livia." He stares directly at Dean when he adds, "It's nice to keep your options open." Then another student calls and asks for him so he rushes to see what they need.

Dean glares at me, "We'll talk about this later."

"But Dean I-" I stop talking when I see the anger practically radiating off of him in waves.

I sign off and return the laptop back in it's spot.

"Hey Livia." Hunter says as he comes up to me. "Where did you apply?"

I shake my head, knowing Dean is right beside me watching my every move, "Nowhere yet."

He looks over at Dean and he must notice how angry he is because he cuts the conversation short, "Oh, well I guess I just came over here to see if it was my day or your day?"

"For what?" Dean asks.

"For being Mr. Morgan's TA? We're supposed to take turns throughout the week." Hunter seems confused that Dean doesn't know but it completely slipped my mind.

Dean answers for me, "You can go today. Livia and I have plans." His words send chills down my spine, I want to crawl inside a hole and hide from him. I should know by now that I can't run away from my problems.

After class Dean walks me instead of us going our separate ways. What really scares me is the fact that he doesn't say a word, he just makes sure I get to class and then leaves. I feel like I'm a prisoner who has to be watched twenty-four seven.

During lunch Dean tells me he has to go to the library to return some books so I rush to Mr. Morgan's room.

"Livia, hi." He greets as I walk in and close the door.

"Dean is pissed, like so angry he's barely saying anything, pissed." I say.

Shawn stands up and walks over to me, his hands rub my shoulders in an attempt to calm me down. "It's going to be okay." He promises me.

I shake my head, "He's never been this mad before." I'm not even sure why, I just said I wanted to apply to a school. "I want to explain something to you, Liv." His eyes are dark and hardened while his grip on my arms tightens. It hurts, "I can't lose you. I won't lose you. I want you to tell me that after this year you'll come with me to California."

He made me promise I would go with him, he told me he wouldn't let me leave. That was where it started for us, when I truly lost my free will. My chest gets tight and I'm having a really hard time breathing. I shouldn't have said I wanted to go somewhere else. What was I thinking?

Shawn wraps his arms around me and pulls me in. The sense of safety wraps around me like a metaphorical blanket. "It's going to be okay." He says in the softest voice I've ever heard. I couldn't imagine what Dean would do if he found out about us. In fact I can't imagine what Dean would do when I leave him in a few weeks.

I nod, pulling away from the comforting arms of my teacher. "You're right, It's going to be fine." I tell him but mostly myself. I take a step back from him, "I should go before Dean gets back and I'm not there."

"If you need anything call me." Shawn says.

I need him to keep Dean far away from me. I need him to help me get away from him but I know he can't. He could lose his job or risk outing us, there's too many if's.

"I will." I lie, I can't call him knowing he'd rush to my aid.

I leave his classroom and make it back to the cafeteria just in time. Dean still doesn't talk much but I'm trying not to worry about it. The rest of the day seems to go by faster than usual. We get to his car in silence and to my surprise Dean doesn't say anything on the way home. A part of me feels relieved but my nerves are still all over the place. I can't help but compare myself to a lamb before the slaughter.

When he pulls into my driveway and parks I take off my seatbelt and look over to him, "What's wrong?" It's rhetorical, I know exactly what's bothering him.

"Get in the house, we'll discuss it there." No, he wants to hurt me, I can feel it.

I shake my head, "No, we need to talk in here." Where it's daylight out and the neighbors can see us.

Dean grips the steering wheel so hard his knuckles turn white, "Livia, if you don't get in that house right now I will pick you up and throw you in it." Knowing he means what he says, I grab my bag and make my way inside my house. Dean follows behind me, I know what's about to happen but I can't stop it.

Dean shuts the door behind him and turns to me. He begins walking toward me but stops and turns left into the kitchen. I follow him in the room and stay silent while I watch him grab a bottle of water in the fridge and begin to drink it. "I'm not actually going to college in New York." I say, trying to soften the blow. "I was just trying to do the assignment."

He tightens his jaw and nods at me. "I thought that I made myself clear when I said you're coming with me. I feel like you're not taking me seriously." His tone is calm but so full of anger. He closes the fridge door hard enough to cause the containers to rattle against the door in protest.

I take a step forward, "I am I-"

"Stop! Lying to me!" He screams, throwing the bottle of water in my direction. I jump as I watch it hit the cabinet before falling to the floor.

I just need to calm him down a little bit, "Dean listen to me, I'm not lying to you."

"Then what was Hunter talking about today? He wants you to split being Morgan's TA? You told me you were done with that!" He's still yelling as loud as before.

"I forgot to tell you, I'm sorry!" I yell back as tears stream down my face. I wish my parents were here to stop him. I wish they were here to stand up for me and see who he truly is.

Dean closes the space between us, he grabs me so fast that I don't have any time to react. "Dean let go of me, please." I beg even harder.

"I tried being nice about it. I tried being a dutiful boyfriend but at some point you need to understand that you can never leave me. You are mine Livia, as soon as I put that ring on your finger you became mine."

I scream as he slams the side of my head into the cabinet beside me. My legs shake and all I want is to fall to the ground and hold my head until the pain subsides. He doesn't let me, he holds me up and forces me to look into his dull eyes. "I shouldn't have to hurt you to get you to understand. You realize that this is your fault right?"

"This is my fault." I give in, bringing my hand to my head in an attempt to relieve some of the pressure. He slaps my hand away and pulls on my hair. "Please, please." I don't know how much more I can take.

He finally lets me go causing me to fall to the ground. My breathing is out of control and I bring my hand up to my head, touching the spot that hurts the most. When I pull back there's blood on my fingers.

Dean doesn't stop even after seeing that I'm bleeding. "Stand up." He demands through his teeth. When I don't he threatens me again so I stand up to the best of my abilities and look at him. "I'm going to ask you something and I want you to answer honestly okay?" I nod slowly, "Is there anything going on between you and Hunter?"

What? "No." I promise.

He punches me in my left eye, "I just don't believe you." He holds up his hand and starts listing things off. "You're distant, you never talked about Sarah until recently and now you spend the weekend with her? Now you're starting to get the notion that you're leaving me and going to New York?"

I shake my head at him, "No," I say exasperated, "I was just looking up the school." In the end that's all I was doing, but to Dean I might as well have bought the next plane ticket out.   

Dean grabs my face and forces me to look at him again despite one eye being swollen shut. "You won't even sleep with me."

Something inside of me wants to give in but I'm so sick of not fighting back, "Maybe it's because you hit me." I say. "You're a monster." I wish I could explain the pure malice on Dean's face when I said that to him.

"You don't mean that." He says.

For the first time since all of this started, "I mean every word."

Something clicks in his head making me terrified for whatever he's planning next. Dean grabs my wrist and drags me behind him towards the stairs. I try to pull away but he grabs me harder forcing me to follow him. When we get to my bedroom he slams the door. "Dean, I'm sorry I didn't mean it." I apologize, not knowing what he's going to do.

He doesn't respond, instead he comes up to me and grabs the hem of my shirt, pulling it up. I try to stop him but to no avail. "What are you doing?" I ask.

"I'm taking what I want." Dean says as he forces my shirt over my head.

At this point I don't care about my head or my eye, he's actually about to rape me.

"Dean, stop. You don't want to do this."

He pushes me on the bed and hovers over me. His knees hold down my arms as he unbuttons his pants. "I've wanted to do this for a long time." He gets off of me long enough to take his pants off. He's quick as he gets back on top of me and tries to take off my pants. I try to push him away but I only make it worse, he gets frustrated with me and hits me. I fall back, touching my stinging lip. I can't let this happen. "Dean you can't do this. You'll never be able to forgive yourself." I'll never be able to forgive him.

He finishes taking my pants off, I start kicking my legs hoping to hurt him but he grabs me. "If you don't stop I'm going to knock you out." I feel like being knocked out would be so much better.

My tears are relentless, "Please." I plead. This isn't how this is supposed to happen. Dean hovers completely over me with my arms now being forcefully held above my head. "Please stop." I try but my voice is weak.

I feel him in between my legs and I can't do anything to stop him.

I hear his phone going off on the floor, "Answer it." Please, God, answer it. "It could be your Dad."

Dean hesitates but eventaully releases me, I bring my wrists down and try to rub the pain on my wrists away. He stands up and reaches down in his pocket to pull out his phone. He answers it and walks out of my room. I get up as quick as I can to get my shirt and underwear back on. My head is throbbing but I don't have the time to see if it stopped bleeding.

Dean walks in just as I'm about to grab my pants, "You're right that was my Dad. He needs me to come home." I nod, wrapping my arms around myself. "If I find out you've been seeing someone else I won't stop for anything next time."

Dean comes up to me and kisses my cheek before putting his pants on and leaving me to myself.

I feel nauseous and run to the bathroom. I make it just in time to puke in the toilet. When I get done I make my way to the sink to brush my teeth. I don't want to look at myself, I know I look like hell.

My head starts pounding as I make my way slowly down the stairs and into the kitchen where my bag is. I know he's the last person I should call but I need him, so I pull out my phone and call Shawn. He answers on the second ring, "Livia? Are you okay?" He asks.

I know he's probably just getting done with Hunter. "My head is bleeding."

"What? What happened?" I hear a car door and then the car starting.

I'm getting very lightheaded as I say, "My head. He hit my head."

Shawn informs me he's on his way and tells me to stay on the phone. I slide down the wall and listen to the sounds the car makes as he drives. Shawn tells me he's here less than ten minutes later.

I hang up the phone and wait for him to rush inside. "Livia, Oh my God." Shawn grabs my chin to turn my head and examine me. "You could have a concussion, what happened?"

My vision blurs slightly and I fight not to fall asleep. I point up to the cabinet and tell him, "He hit my head on the cabinet."

"Jesus. We have to get you to the hospital." He says as he looks around my kitchen for a towel. When he comes back the towel is warm as he presses it against my head, "You have to stay awake."

"You can't take me to the hospital." He'll look suspicious, not to mention Dean will most likely find out about us.

Shawn shakes his head at me, "I don't care anymore...I never should've let you go home with him." There's nothing he could've done, we both know that. I wince at the pressure the towel has on my head but it doesn't hurt as bad as my eye. "Livia, where are your pants?" He asks. I don't respond, I just look him in the eyes and pretend the last hour of my life didn't happen. Shawn doesn't pretend with me, "Did he-?" He doesn't finish the sentence.

"No," I answer. "His Dad called before he could get that far."

"That son of a bitch." His hand curls into a fist but I put my hand over his to calm him down. His green eyes bore into mine, "I'm so sorry," His other hand pulls back from my head, "The bleeding stopped. It doesn't look that bad but I still think you should go see a doctor."

"And say what?" I ask.

"That Dean did this to you. At the very least the cops could-"

"No," I interrupt, "The last thing I need is for the authorities to get involved. I don't want to be the girl with the abusive boyfriend. I can't be that girl, Shawn."

He sighs at me, "It's too late, Livia..." Shawn moves a piece of hair behind my ear, "I don't want anything else to happen to you." I know that he's right, I need to go to the hospital and I need to leave Dean for good.

I can only have the courage to do one of those things, "Okay, you can take me to the hospital. I can say I fell down the stairs and you came over for tutoring or something." I force myself to stand up as Shawn gets up with me.

He holds me steady, "Livia."

"I'm sick of lying too but-"

"No, it just doesn't explain your eye and lip."

My shoulders slump, he's right. "What am I going to do?" I ask but I know what I have to do. I just don't have the balls to do it.