08 | Take That, Goliath

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Nolan didn't know what to do.

Before his parents died, he went to church on holidays, and that was about it. At least then, he had people to sit and talk with while he waited for the sermon and holiday presentation to begin. Now, he'd been abandoned by Caleb and Sam, who'd run off somewhere with a group of other kids. Sam's parents were still in the lobby. The awkwardness of hovering by his brother's friend's parents had been too much, so he'd edged his way into the sanctuary. When he didn't see Nora or the others, he'd slid into an available spot at the back, by the door. He could only hope that the people a few spaces down weren't intending on holding those seats for anyone else.

His legs jangled. He shouldn't be here. It was a lie, to sit here, "listen" to Mr. Sison talk about being faithful to God, and pretend to pray. God didn't exist. That had all but been proven the night his parents were slaughtered. And if by some chance there was someone up there, looking down on them, then Nolan wanted nothing to do with them. Nothing.

"Nolan!"

He spun, and for the first time, he was relieved to see Nora waving, that ever-bright smile on her face. "Hey," he said, when she was close enough to hear him.

"Hey," she said. "If you want, you can sit with us. I'll be leaving to teach class, but Max and Andy will be staying out here."

"Oh, uh..."

"No-No!"

Riley flung herself into his arms. Apparently, he was No-No.

"Oh," he murmured, awkwardly patting her back. "Hey, Riley."

She pulled away, her hands on his shoulders. "You came!"

He nodded.

She squealed and hugged him again, and he cast an uncertain glance in Nora's direction. Nora pressed her fist to her mouth to hide a laugh.

"Are you coming to class today?" Riley asked. She was done hugging him now, and had hopped into the space next to his. She leaned her head against his arm.

"Uh..."

"Please?"

"Sure," he said.

Dammit. He didn't even know what he'd agreed to.

"Awesome," Nora said. Her eyes were wide, betraying her shock. "It'll be fun."

Riley grabbed him by the cheeks, pulling at them and shifting them back and forth. Was she channeling someone's grandmother? "Your cheeks are squishy," she said.

"Uh-huh." The not-word was surprisingly difficult to get out as Riley continued playing with his face.

"Will you come sit with me and my mommy?" she asked. She prodded at his cheeks. "We sit over there."

She pointed to the leftmost column of pews, second row from the front.

"Uh..."

The second pew from the front. Somehow, that felt even more blasphemous than hiding in the back.

"Sure," he said. Dammit.

"Yay!" Riley squealed. She grabbed onto his hand and tugged him to his feet. "Come on!"

With one final glance at Nora, he allowed Riley to haul him toward the front.

"Mommy!" she called as they approached. A middle-aged woman with short, brunette hair, looked up and smiled.

"This is Nolan," Riley said as they settled into the pew. "He's my new best friend."

Nolan smiled awkwardly. Her mom smiled back.

"Hi, Nolan," Riley's mom said. "It's nice to meet you."

"It's nice to meet you, too," he said.

"Nolan's coming to our class today."

"Is he?" her mom asked, bringing an affectionate hand through Riley's hair. "Well, isn't that exciting?"

Riley nodded, and while Nolan didn't necessarily agree, he nodded, too.

He fastened his gaze to the cross hanging on the back wall of the stage. If he hadn't agreed to come here today, he'd still be sleeping.

"Fancy meeting you here."

He twisted around to find Andy, Erin, Max, and Willow sliding into the pew behind him. Riley spun, too, an ecstatic grin on her face. "No-No's coming to class today," she said.

"Aw, man," Andy said, "now I'm stuck here alone with Max."

"You could do so much worse than me."

Nora dropped into the free space next to Willow. "Okay, so we have everything set up for class, right?" she asked. "We didn't forget anything? Why do I feel like I'm forgetting something?"

"I think we do," Erin said. "But I'm just as forgetful, so I wouldn't trust me on that."

"Did we get the snacks?" Willow asked.

"Snacks!" Nora flew from her seat.

"I think we forgot snacks," Willow said.

"Hello, hello!"

Nolan turned. Mr. Sison—Pastor Nathan—had taken the stage, placing his Bible on the podium.

"How's everyone doing today?" Mr. Sison asked.

"Good," they chorused.

"How about you?" Andy shouted.

Nolan nearly laughed.

"My dad likes to be appreciated," Willow explained to him.

"Ah."

"Thank you for asking, Andy," Mr. Sison said. "I'm doing swell."

The congregation laughed.

Announcements and the offering were made. Nora slipped back into her seat just as they were called to worship, and there she remained until kids church was announced.

The elephant was staring at him.

Not an actual elephant. A cartoon elephant, which belonged to Cartoon Noah and his equally cartoon ark, all of which were painted onto the far wall. Nolan looked at Nora, who was right next to the staring elephant, with Erin and Willow. They were surrounded by little bodies lounging on bean bags or on the carpeted floor and were reenacting the story of David and Goliath.

For the most part, children's church had been relatively painless. Not the first thing he'd choose to spend his Sunday mornings doing, but at least it was better than a typical sermon. "Fun" seemed to be the most important thing. There were crafts, snacks, and now a show.

Riley grabbed onto his arm. She was curled up on his lap, as she had been since dragging him over to one of the free bean bags.

"Ooohhh!" the crowd of children chorused.

Willow and Erin faced off like sumo wrestlers in a ring, and seemed to be having a hard time not laughing. Willow yanked a toy slingshot from her jeans pocket. How was she wearing jeans? It was eighty degrees out.

Erin let out a deep chuckle. "You'll never defeat me with such a puny—"

Willow yanked the string back and released. A piece of crumpled paper whacked Erin right between the eyes. Nolan's eyebrows rose. That was actually kind of impressive.

"Take that, Goliath!" Willow shouted.

Erin jolted and slid dramatically to the floor. She closed her eyes and stuck out her tongue for good measure.

"And that, my friends, is how our friend, David, defeated Goliath," Nora said.

The kids cheered and clapped their hands. Nora and Willow bowed, while Erin scrambled to her feet and bowed, too. Riley grabbed onto Nolan's hands and forced him to clap along.

"Thank you, thank you!" Nora said once the cheers had died down.

"Do you know what it's time for?" Erin asked, planting her hands on her knees.

The kids cheered again. Caleb and Sam, seated in the front, were a couple of the most enthused. "Song time!" they yelled.

Oh.

"Wow, you guys are such good guessers," Erin said. Her students laughed.

Nora grabbed her ukulele from where it leaned against the wall. She plopped onto the floor, crossing her legs. Erin and Willow claimed spots on the outer circle.

"Now," Nora said. She smiled around at everyone, lingering briefly when she reached Nolan. "I know you guys might have some Goliaths in your lives. Mean teachers, hard homework, bullies at school, self-doubt, sadness, you name it. But just know that God is watching over you, and He'll help you through. And, of course, I'm always here if you need a hug."

That got a few laughs. Sam nudged Caleb, and Caleb sent a beaming smile her way. So hopeful that God would help him defeat his Goliath.

Anger flared. Don't get his hopes up.

It was great that, for this moment, Caleb saw an end to the pain Johnny Parson caused him. But to lay it all on someone who probably wasn't there?

"Let's trust our good friend, God, okay?" Nora said. "He's got our backs."

A few kids looked over their shoulders, searching for their good friend, the Lord.

"Okay, guys!" Nora said, patting her ukulele. "Who's ready for the prayer song?"

He'd thought the cheering was loud before. But this was right up there with Greeley High's cafeteria.

"Awesome!" She grinned. "Okay, did everyone who wanted to participate write something on the list or ask one of us to help?"

She gestured toward the door, where a long sheet of paper had been taped next to the frame, filled with various sentences made out of wobbly letters.

Everyone nodded. "Okay then," Nora said. "Now, remember, even if you didn't write your prayer on the paper, it doesn't mean that God can't hear it. It's okay if you want to keep your prayers between you and Him."

Riley looked up at him. "I wrote a prayer today," she whispered.

"You did?" he asked.

"Mm-hmm!"

"Let's do this!"

Nora started strumming an upbeat tune. All around, children bobbed to the beat.

"It's about that time again," Nora sang, "when we gather with our friends."

Riley shouted the words, right along with most of the other kids in the room.

"To talk with our friend, God," she continued, "about what's going on. So how 'bout we close our eyes and throw our hands up toward the sky, because it's time to pray and here's what we have to say."

Nora's eye raked over the prayer list. Was she going to make up lyrics as she went along? Impressive.

"Hey, Lord, could you help my mom? She's been feeling really down," she sang. He snapped to attention.

"And could you say hi to Dad? I miss him really, really bad."

On and on the prayers went. He sat there, wide-eyed, unable to fully comprehend. Not all of the prayers were like the first two. Some were simpler, about lost toys or items the kids wanted, and some were about annoying siblings and other irksome situations. But so many were serious. A sick brother. Fighting parents. A runaway sister. Bullies. Fear.

He scanned the room. They all seemed so happy.

He'd always been astounded at how Caleb and Greg could go through life as though it hadn't screwed them over. Yeah, there were times when they grew teary-eyed over their parents or spoke in soft, somber tones, but, for the most part, they seemed to have moved on from their pain. They could laugh freely and hang out with friends and not visualize people disappearing into thin air.

And now these kids...

Why was he the only one frozen?

"This has been a real nice talk," Nora sang, "and we love you very much. We hope you liked our song and that you sang along. But now our song is done, and all that's left to say is—"

"Amen!"

She smiled, but as her eyes drifted back to the list, her smile faltered—just barely, but enough.

She looked away. "Great job, you guys!" she said. "Now, what song would you like to hear next?"

Suggestions clanged. Riley spun around in his lap and grabbed ahold of his cheeks again. "She said mine!" she said. Her eyes were wide, hopeful. "Do you think He's going to tell my daddy I said hi?"

Nolan's stomach dropped. "Yeah," he said.

"Yay!"

She turned away to sing along with the rest of her class, and he stared unseeingly at the wall, stomach knotted like a pile of electrical chords. He just...couldn't believe it. Riley had experienced the same pain he had.

His gaze hardened, and he glared at the ceiling. If You exist, if You're really up there, You better march up to that little girl's father and tell him she says hi.

There was one good thing about Holy Trinity: the food.

Nolan reached for anything at the serving table—easily a twenty-four seater—that caught his eye. Crackers. Cheese. Cookies. A cupcake. Some mixed fruit. By the time he reached the end of the table, his paper plate was bursting.

He found Nora and the others waiting by the fellowship area door. They wouldn't be eating at one of the many tables scattering the area. Willow had suggested that it might be more efficient to just take their food and head to the library instead of trying to discuss things in the midst of the chaos. Nolan didn't know why a church would need a library, but he was glad for the refuge of a quiet space.

The library, it turned out, was on the opposite side of the building, just past the lobby and adjacent to the classroom hall. It was bigger than he expected, and there were actual novels, not just rows upon rows of Holy Bibles—though there were definitely a fair share of those, too.

Nora led the way to a lounge area nestled in the corner, complete with two couches, four chairs, and a coffee table. She kicked off her shoes and hopped onto one of the chairs, and the rest of them followed suit.

Nolan settled into the chair at Nora's side.

"Okay," Willow said. "What's the plan?"

Nora bit her lip.

"Do you know what song you're doing?" Nolan asked.

"Yeah." She flashed him a relieved look. "It's actually the one we just did at youth group."

"Oooh," Erin said. "I like that one."

"Thanks," Nora said. She looked at Nolan. "It's called Rumpled Blankets."

"Cool."

"So, I guess the first thing would be to record it," Nora said. She toyed with her necklace.

"Yeah," Nolan said. "That'll make writing the script easier."

"You should totally write it, eh, Bailey?" Andy wrapped an arm around her shoulders, and she blushed. "She's an amazing writer," he explained to Nolan.

"I am not," Erin murmured, but she was smiling.

"Yes, you are," Nora said. The others hummed and nodded in agreement.

"Would you be up for that?" Willow asked.

Erin nodded. "Sure."

"What sort of stuff do we need organized?" Willow asked, crossing one leg over the other and leaning forward, intent gaze shifting between Nora and Nolan.

Nora didn't seem to have an answer. Nolan took the lead. "Once we have a script, we'll need to make and keep track of a budget. Unless you already have one?" He looked at Nora.

"I'd rather not go over a hundred," Nora said. "I know that's probably not possible, but..."

"We can make it work," he said. Once, he'd made a short film off twenty dollars. All they needed was the right locations, the right people...

A familiar excitement flowed through him. It was so natural, so familiar.

"Really?" Nora asked.

"Yeah," he said.

"What's after that?" Max asked.

"We'll need to break the screenplay down and see what locations, props—whatever—that we'll need. From there, I can plan shots, and we can start looking around for places that'll let us shoot on their property, if necessary."

Shoot.

His mom's eyes.

He blinked and cursed himself. Different kind of shoot, asshole.

"Location scouting sounds like the shit," Andy said.

"Swear jar."

"Whatever." He rolled his eyes. "I'm in for location scouting."

"Me, too," Max said.

"I'll make whatever schedules and lists we need," Willow said.

The group was off, discussing details and possible deadlines, and Nolan sat back, listening to it all. He'd forgotten what it was like to be surrounded by creative people.

He didn't hate it.

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