"What if I told that I love you?
                    Would you tell me that you love me back?"

There comes a moment in every relationship or friendship when you realize you love the other person. Something likely happens in your life or theirs that evokes this emotion. Mine was right here, right now. Sitting next to Kayden in this faded blue hospital chair as he was laying down on the hospital bed, a wide gash spread across his forehead, thankfully covered by a white bandage. My mind had been wandering through thoughts for two hours now, silently screaming for him to open those scintillating blue eyes I was so deeply in love with. The mere thought of losing him, or never seeing those eyes again had me shaking with fear. That's how I knew I loved him. My fingers mindlessly playing with his un-ivied hand as my mind roamed through the numerous possibilities of what could possibly happen.

It was at this moment that I realized, in which I knew. Longing to stare into his guilelessly wide and intoxicatingly intense turquoise eyes. Praying to God with my entire heart and soul to forgive Kayden for whatever he did in some past life to deserve this. I knew this wasn't a come and go feeling, this wasn't temporary. I loved him. And this time I wasn't going to be a coward and let him say it first, because every passing moment we're dying, and every second I waste being too anxious, I was risking him falling asleep forever without knowing I love him.

____________________________________________________________________________

TWO HOURS EARLIER

*ARRIVING AT THE HOSPITAL*

Charlotte insisted that Maddie come with me to the Hospital. Because according to her, it was dangerous to ride in a taxi, in the state I was in, alone. The sky was now turning an invariant equatorial of bright red and orange, it was an eternally tranquil sight, yet it felt so horrible because of the events happening at the same time. The sun dipped below the horizon, the last gasp of beauty before the death of the day. Losing light meant that Maddie and I would have to move quickly because since her accident Maddie was deadly afraid to ride in a car after dark hours. I didn't blame her, just wished that I didn't have to drag her everywhere with me. I don't even know how she's been feeling lately because she hasn't spoken a word all day.

 It was nothing out of the ordinary, but it still worried me more and more every epoch. Her silence was her sanctuary, but my torment, because the one person who I'd always trusted to keep my words in her hospice of a mind had become so aloof I didn't even know how to communicate with her. The taxi ride was noiseless, to say the least, the only sound was the occasional engine stopping at a red light, or the usual New York crowd screaming, and dancing, and singing, and chattering, incomparable smiles on their faces as if the world was okay.

But everything wasn't okay, was it? Everything would never be okay. The world would never be okay. Because there are seven billion people in the world and thousands are dying by the minute. With all that death and destruction, how can it be possible for the world to be fine? Yet, I understood the enthusiasm of the crowd. They knew the world wasn't perfect, and that it could never be, but they chose to celebrate the moments that were precious to them, even if they didn't last forever. There was something beautiful about that, something enchanting.

I looked over at Maddie, her icy blue eyes were now shining with concern, I'd almost forgotten how close she had gotten to Kayden, forgotten that maybe she did care about him. She barely left her hair out anymore, it was a blonde mess on top of her head, she might call it a bun, but I didn't and couldn't see it. This silence between us felt like a web, one that we were both so tangled in that neither of us could find a way out. It was like she was drifting and drifting out of my reach, and it scared me s*itless. 

When her cold eyes met my warm green ones I could see a slight streak of sympathy painted over her face, but she caught me more by surprise when she wordlessly, pulled me into a hug. That's when I broke. All the emotions I'd been holding in since I got that call fifteen minutes ago, all the worry, tears spilled over and flowed down my face like a river escaping a dam. My body looked calm compared to how raveled my mind was. A dark abyss had consumed my brain where demons of worry, depression, and anxiety were taking circles around my head.

I clutched Maddie with all the strength I had in me, trying to disguise my shock. Maddie was never one for physical touch, in fact, she normally flinched when someone unfamiliar came in contact with her because there were too many memories that clouded her mind. So this one simple embrace exposed all the love and emotions she hadn't shown since her accident. The words she had not said, the emotions she had been captive to. 

I whimpered, my nose buried in her shoulder, as quiet broken sobs sent shock waves through my body, and heavy tears coursed down my cheeks. I felt like I was high on emotions right now. When I pulled away, my tears blurring my vision, our eyes once again converging, and looking at her face, I saw a single drop of a tear map its way down her smooth rosy cheeks. I could hear the excruciatingly agonizing sound of my heart breaking into a million isolated pieces scattered all over.

She intertwined her artists' hands with my own piano playing ones, that simple action scared off a majority of the demons swarming around in my head, but not all of them. We still didn't talk, didn't utter a single word, let the silence be a blanket around us, now comforting instead of frustrating.

Tentatively stepping out from the car, as the tall dreadful Hospital building came into view, Maddie's grip on my hand tightened likely noticing the tension displayed on my face. But I wouldn't panic, not now, I knew it was coming, and when it didn't surprise me when I expected it, I could control it, avoid it. Entering the hospital, I took a deep breath as I heard the click-clack of Maddie's black boots from behind me. 

Once she was by my side again, I resumed trying to normalize my heartbeat, she gave me a wistful smile as she confidently marched to the front desk. The scrupulously spotless white walls seemed to swallow me whole, posters on the wall about eating healthy and a line of patient rooms in a row. It was sterile. When Maddie came back with the directions, I wordlessly followed her lead, still trying to decrease my blood pleasure. 

Breathe in and out. 1, 2, 3.

Trying to find Kayden's comforting soft voice in my head, reserved for when he talked to me only. In the midst of my search, I didn't notice Maddie had stopped in front of a ritzy well equipped white and blue room, and I crashed into her back. Turning her head around to glare at me, she rolled her eyes at my nervous expression before pulling the door open and pushing me inside.

The inside was surprisingly big, it didn't seem like Kayden was sharing it with anyone. The bed he was peacefully resting on right now. He looked so damn pale it hurt my heart, dark circles unveiled on display under his closed eyes, hiding the sight of those charming prepossessing eyes, arms lying by his side, unmoving. A solicit tear streamed down my face as I took in the sight of him, so broken. I heard Maddie's faint conversation with Jayden, who had been seated on the chair aside of the hospital cot with his head buried in his hands.

 I forced my eyes from Kayden to take a look at Jay, his hair was unkempt and tousled as if he'd run his hands through it a million times, even deeper eye bags under his eyes, and he looked like he'd been crying. Jayden was always the more emotional one, but he'd been the one I'd seen more put together than his brother. I wonder where Lily was. Something had happened to Jayden. Maybe between him and his brother, because this wasn't like him. 

He'd be the one comforting everyone right now, screaming about Kayden's fortitude and how he was going to be fine. How we were all worrying for nothing. I was waiting to hear that. I cautiously approached him, and upon seeing me he pulled me into a bear hug. I wrapped my arms around his back. When we pulled away, I let my eyes silently ask him what my mind was wondering. He guided me out of the room and Maddie stayed in there with Kayden.

Once back outside, he pulled me into one of those blue hospital chairs they place outside in the waiting room. Sitting down he slowly took an ocean deep breath. Running his fingers through his uncombed hair, he confessed,

"It's my fault. It's my fault he was in that car. The Doctor says he'll be fine. But it's my fault he's here in the first place. If I hadn't told the coach about Kayden wanting to join back if I hadn't said all those vicious things to him in the first place. He wouldn't be here. Oh my god, he must hate me, V, he has to. The things I said-" He broke off, sobs swaying his body back and forth as he wrapped his arms around himself.

Obviously, I still didn't know the whole story, don't know what exactly Jayden did, or the words he spoke. But I did know that whatever he said, couldn't be bad, nothing was unforgivable. A sibling bond was special, beautiful, and unbreakable because anything can be forgiven. Though I didn't have a blood sibling, I had Maddie, who I had fought with a myriad of times. The words exchanged between two siblings during an argument would always be forgotten, the next day none of those insults would be remembered. Yet, the consolation I felt inside me when I heard what the Doctor said was incomprehensible. I felt so relieved.

"Jayden. Listen to me. Whatever he said, whatever you did or said, it's not forever. It's always forgivable. And Kayden? He's the most forgiving person I know, he has to be, because he's said things, done things he didn't mean to as well. It's not your fault, so stop dwelling on what already happened. Think about the first thing we're gonna say to him when he wakes up. You can apologize or you can not, it doesn't matter, the secret of siblings is that there is no 

"I'm sorry" it's just a series of buying each other food until you can make it up." He nods, and after a small silence, softly whispers that he wants to be alone. So I nod, ruffle his hair a little, and walk back to the room. I needed to find my phone and call Lily to get here ASAP.

As if hearing my thought, she walked in, dressed in something you'd never see Lily out in public in, she was wearing a black crop top with grey sweatpants, and a sweatshirt (likely Jayden's) wrapped around her waist. More proof of how fast she rushed here. Upon seeing my surprised expression, she scowled.
"Not. A. Word. Grace." She ground out, her eyes blazing with frustration. I put my hands up in surrender and tried to contain my giggles as I saw Mads laughing in the corner of Kay's room, the sound like ringing bells. It'd been a while since I saw her smile that bright. It manufactured a duplicate of one on my face too.

____________________________________________________________________________

Back to PRESENT

As my thoughts drowned in the black tumultuous waters of overthinking, I felt a wave of tiredness take me over. My hand still in Kayden, I let sleep completely consume me. The next time I woke up was to the sound of the voice I'd been dying to hear since it was subdued.

"Rise and Shine, beautiful," Kayden whispered, his voice hoarse, grinning.

A/N: HEY! HAPPY SATURDAY MY BOOTIFUL PEOPLE. HAPPY NEW CHAPTER DAY. LET'S CELEBRATE! KAYDEN'S ALIVE! WOOHOO. 

Also can we please pretty please get to 2.1k? okay thanks.

QOTC: Do you agree with what Valeria said about siblings, or no?

VOTE. COMMENT (please?) AND SHAREEEEE

FOLLOW.

Signing off for now,