Yumminess is now personified. Men quarrel. Shay oozes snot like a dying sea sponge. I forgot to update because I have no excuse. And mud comes back in fashion!

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Shay woke up on her side, encompassed about by warmth and fur. She lay on stone, but it was warm, and for that she was grateful. Everything about her existence felt vulnerable and raw, as though she had been rebooted without warning or any short-term memory to give her grounding. What she did have was aches and pains everywhere, especially in her stomach and throat, and a gutted out sensation as though someone had thrown her off a cliff and left her to die.

Something like wire tickled her sky-facing ear. Hot air puffed over her face.

Slowly, she opened her eyes to find darkness, lit by full moonlight and stars. Black fur blacked the vision of one eye, but the other could see the hunched form of a young man with golden hair and drooping, speckled cat ears.

"Parker?"

The ears twitched, but only raised a little bit. He lifted his head to give her a happy smile, though it lacked his usual energy.

"You sound terrible," he said, very softly, as though he might hurt her if he spoke too loud. And, with the way she was feeling, that may just happen.

The warmth behind her rumbled. She touched the panther arm her head rested on and let her fingers sink through the silky fur of his paw.

Parker's smile fell away.

"You're in this terrible state because I failed to protect you," he said. "I called myself your mate and then left you unprotected. I should have at least taken you with me, but I was so stupid. I'm still stupid."

His head hung off his shoulders, which had begun to tremble.

"I'm so sorry, Shay. I'm so sorry, I don't deserve to be your mate."

She ached for him, knowing all too well how it felt to be so weak. She also ached because, as his tears caught the starlight on their way down, his affection for her finally seemed real rather than just the clingy possessiveness of a child over a favorite toy.

Weakly, she reached out and touched his knee.

"It could have happened to anyone," she said, though she still sounded like a chain-smoker even after clearing her throat.

"But it happened to you because I was rash and stupid...and acted little better than a feral myself..."

After a moment of quiet sobbing, he tentatively reached out and touched the end of her fingers.

"I love you, Shay. You don't have to mate me, just get better, okay? I'll get you whatever you need, so you don't have to worry anymore. We'll be taking you back to The City of Beasts, where no feral could touch you. Neara will be there too."

She turned her hand and captured his fingers, giving them a gentle squeeze. A hand squeeze was a good reward for a love confession, right?

His eyes then flickered to her ankle, a familiar twist of jealousy wrinkling his nose, but ruined by the softness of guilt.

"My mom...my mom can help you get rid of that thing."

She followed his gaze to a red snake tattoo coiled up her ankle and calf, except it was unlike any tattoo she had ever seen. It had a surreal 3D effect to it brought about by the detailed scales and the clear, red eyes staring unseeingly from her skin.

Her heart stuttered in her chest. "That..."

"Unless you wanted to be married to him..." Parker's tone couldn't be more obviously choked with jealousy.

She blinked. "No. No, I didn't agree to this, I didn't want this at all, he just put it--I'm married?"

So this was a beast mark? But the others she had seen had looked like little more than line-art. She never thought one could be so...beautiful.

Some distance away, a monstrous roar called up.

Shay stiffened. Her body protested at the action.

In response, the panther curled his thick tail over her hips and laid his heavy head over her shoulder. His chest rumbled.

"It's okay," murmured Parker. "They can't reach us."

A flap of enormous wings broke the quiet, followed by a clack of claws. The claws turned to the slap of bare feet against stone.

"Is she awake?" asked a familiar voice.

Parker scowled at whoever approached them.

"No thanks to you."

The footsteps faltered.

"I brought fruit," it said quietly.

"Shay, you hungry?"

She coughed. "Thirsty."

"I can squeeze out the juice for you," said the voice. "You're dehydrated. The panther said juice would be easier on the stomach than pure water."

"I can do it myself," she tried to push herself up. Instantly her arms shook.

The panther head immediately pushed down with a disapproving, but gentle growl.

"No! Rest, I can feed you," said Parker. "Hand me a fruit, Muir."

The footsteps continued forward and a familiar man with an unbelievably muscled chest and shoulders came into view, with black hair and smooth, pale skin. He wore a cloak with grey feathered shoulders, which he used to hide his nakedness as he squatted down and set to work slicing one of the plum-looking fruit in his palm with sharp, black fingernails.

"I said to hand it to me," snapped Parker, trying to swipe it from him.

Muir easily held it out of his reach. Three navy blue triangles adorned his jawline, two on one side and one on the other.

"Why should I?" asked the tri-striped man with a stoney look. "You aren't her mate."

Parker faltered, then slumped back, defeated, angrily wiping at his too-bright eyes.

Shay appreciated that her exhaustion stopped her from thinking about how sanitary it was to eat pieces of fruit from the fingers of a naked man she had no idea where he'd been. Though it didn't stop her from wanting to roll over and die when she noticed the man's pale cheeks darken and his lips part.

The panther behind her started to growl for real, but the man ignored him, obviously enraptured with bringing slices of peach-strawberry flavored flesh to her lips for her to scoop in with her tongue and teeth.

Parker started to fidget. "Stop being disgusting, bird."

Shay swallowed the last piece. "So you're that black eagle? The one who got bitten?"

A small smile broke the stony face, and the effect blew her mind. She suddenly didn't mind his blush so much. He had the most piercing eyes, even shadowed in night like now. And his marble lips worked ridiculously well with high cheek bones. He was the perfect replica of a dark, proud, and deadly prince.

The men of this world were too beautiful.

"Yes. You saved my life. My name is Muir." But then the smile fell away and he looked down, putting a hand over his heart. "I apologize for what I put you through."

She licked juice off her lips. "Yeah, it sucked to live through it, but it worked. So thank you."

Muir stared. Parker bristled.

"Don't be so nice to him! You almost died!"

"But it was really clever."

Muir's color, which had just been cooling down to pale again, rose up once more. He turned his face away, a hand to his mouth.

Parker gave a loud disgruntled growl before getting to his feet and stomping away. He returned quickly with another fruit, which he cut with a claw as well, though not as clean and precise as Muir. He took a turn feeding her as well, but half way through her exhaustion overcame her and she fell back asleep.

When she woke up next, morning had come and a snoozing leopard had replaced Parker in front of her. She shifted with a wince as a night sleeping on rock came back to bite her in the form of a bruised hip and shoulder. The panther at her back rose up with her, nudging his head gently against her side. She obliged him with a pet, delighting in the fluffy and velvety black ears. A purr like stones grinding against each other started up.

She chuckled. "Good morning, Ryan."

As she stood, clearing her throat and sniffing through the remains of her cold, she got her first view of the plateau they had taken her too. The top of the forest canopy could be seen in the distance, but otherwise it was but stone and sky.

And perched on a short wall of said stone was the black eagle, big as a car and feathers gleaming with highlights of blue. Its head flicked back to watch her with a piercing, electric blue eye.

She leaned heavily on Ryan as a wave of dizziness punished her for changing position.

Instantly, the eagle hopped down and transformed into the cloaked Muir.

"You should eat more," he said, dropping down to a large fruit-laden leaf, but not before Shay had the misfortune of getting a good sight of his rather large, furry piece.

She ran a hand down her face. "Ugh, I want to pants this world."

Muir, who had loaded both hands with what looked like some relative of a banana and a purple apple looked at her. "What?"

"Nothing."

The panther beneath her hand made a whuffling, snorting sound, which could only be the big cat equivalent of a laugh.

Muir hesitated, glancing uncertainly at the panther with a small frown, before crossing the distance and offering her the fruit.

"I can find you meat too, if your stomach is up to it," he said. He had a stiff way of speaking, as though to a commander.

Shay didn't think much of it, busy averting her eyes. "How long are we staying here?"

"The smell of the egg should dissipate on its own within a month," said Muir, looking down, which Shay took as the stone-faced beastmen's version of shame. His thoughts and feelings didn't show much on his face, and his expressions so far had been small. "I can't take you back to the City of Beasts like this, else it will lead the horde there."

"Hadn't thought of that." Shay peeled the banana and found the insides to be bright green. She sniffed it tentatively, but only got snot and groaned. Not having her nose was like being blind.

Then, thinking of snot gave her an idea.

"Couldn't we cover up the smell with mud?"

Ryan gave a short purr and licked her exposed side, making her jump.

"Ouch! Watch it! Your tongue's like sandpaper."

"That could work," said Muir quietly. "You're very clever."

"Thank the snot," she said, just stopping herself from displaying the hand she'd just used to wipe her face. Ugh, nasty nasty nasty.

A noisy yawn followed by several pops announced the awakening leopard, who then quickly shifted into a naked Parker. Thankfully, he had his skirt nearby, which he deftly wrapped about himself even half-awake.

"Shay, how are you feeling?"

Muir, exchanging a look with the panther, nodded. "Then I'll go collect some mud."

With that, he shifted back into the ginormous bird and lifted off, sending such a gust that Shay's snake-skin skirt fluttered up, forcing her to pull a Monroe to preserve some dignity. At the panther's low, throaty noise that almost sounded like that of appreciation, she flushed and stepped away.

"Pervert," she muttered.

"Why's he getting mud?" Parker asked, sliding up to Shay. His tail brushed against her bare lower back.

Ryan stepped across Shay to snap at him, and Parker stumbled back with a shout.

Shay just pinched her nose and dropped her head back. "Seriously, guys? This early in the morning?"

Ryan shifted into human form, almond yellow eyes narrowed on his brown and gold counterpart. While he said nothing, the glower and the way he squared his stance in front of Shay said everything.

Parker, the beast of lesser strength, stepped back and his ears flattened, but his boundless courage wasn't cowed.

"Just eat, Shay," said Parker. "You have a lot of recovering to do."

A flash of white fang peeked out from Ryan's chocolate lips. "Don't mind us, sweetling. It's just a talk between males."

She sighed. "Whatever. As long as you don't leave me high and dry on a platter for dinos--I mean, collosals."

"Never," Ryan just about purred, which threw her off for a moment. The only Ryan she'd known so far had been the strained, meek one. The smooth words went far too well with his already velvety voice and even the one word had made her involuntary shiver.

Feeling strangely warm, she took her funny green banana and purple apple back to her sleeping place, which had been conveniently placed between two tall stones to keep out the wind. She imagined it would be decent enough space should a fight break out. Ugh, men.

Sure enough, both Parker and Ryan shifted back into beast forms, where the difference between them became even more striking. Besides their coats, the panther nearly doubled the leopards mass mostly by muscle, but also in size. Parker looked almost skinny in comparison.

Nevertheless, Parker still bared his fangs and yowled, the fur along his back and tail spiking.

The panther had no need for such a show. It merely growled low in it's throat and lunged, whacking down the other with one heavy black paw. Parker slid and stumbled, but managed to righten himself and leap.

He dug his claws into the panther's back, only to be swung around and onto the ground beneath the panther's paws. Ryan gave a scratchy roar which cracked the air and seemed to send ripples across Shay's very skin. Without meaning to, she drew back, heart leaping in fright.

Parker writhed, gnashing and clawing, before finally falling still and whimpering.

Only after a particularly high whine did Ryan remove his paws from Parker's chest.

Instantly, Parker twisted into his human form.

"What kind of three stripe are you?" asked Parker with a scowl.

The panther shifted back into the dark-skinned Ryan, whose self-satisfied smirk looked far too sinful for Shay's comfort.

"You say that like you frequently duel tri-striped beasts."

Parker's cocky looked wasn't nearly as attractive. Though Parker did have a nice face.

"How do you think I managed to get two stripes by eighteen?"

Ryan's self-satisfaction faltered.

"Huh?"

Meanwhile, Shay spat out the green banana and went for the apple. She'd found a fruit she didn't like. Green bananas. They hurt her mouth and were too sweet. And the purple apple tasted much like a sweet pink lady apple. While good, it did sting her sensitive throat, bringing up a coughing fit that wouldn't have been nearly as painful if all her stomach muscles hadn't been abused. Staying sitting up and coughing at the same time was too much to ask for.

Thus, she ended up with two very concerned cat-eared men at her side, worry palpable.

Goodbye days where I can properly hack out a lung in peace.

Ryan put a big, hot hand on her back and, though it felt endlessly good on her poor sore muscles, she already knew Parker was bristling. Conflict was tiring.

"I'll find you some Cool Fire Leaf," he said softly.

"Couldn't you just leave your hand there for a moment?" she asked, though she instantly regretted it. "I mean, I don't mean anything by it, it's just warm and everything hurts so much--" Too much talking. Speech limit reached. Another coughing spell came over her.

"I can massage her," said Parker quickly. "What? I can't find the leaf."

Shay shoved through a particularly painful cough to push at them both, though the effect was as though she hadn't done anything at all. She might as well be pushing on boulders.

"If you're--cough!--just going to--COUGH!"

Ryan's other warm hand pushed gently on her shoulder. "Stop trying to talk and lay down, there's nothing to get riled up over."

Like hell she thought. Leave it to the fighting men to not realize how awkward it was to be the one fought over.

Once Ryan rolled her back onto her side, her breathing eased but her bruised hip and shoulder protested at being pressed against stone again. She couldn't help but whimper.

Fortunately, Parker caught her wince.

"The stone's too hard," he said, frowning. "She was squirming a lot in her sleep last night too."

Heat ran up to her skin. Watching me while I sleep? What are you, Edward Cullen? For the record, she had never found that particular fictional character hot.

"I know, this is only for a moment," Ryan said.

As she fought to steady her breathing, Ryan gently moved his hand up and down her back, kneading the muscles in her back with soft, but firm fingers. The motion pushed a groan out of her against her will.

"I can do that!" snapped Parker, grabbing Ryan's wrist. "Don't you have a plant to get?"

"Parker--" her vocal cords snapped painfully and she had to cough to detach them. Pain. So much pain.

"If you want to be useful, go away," said Ryan darkly. "You're stressing her out with your need to quarrel."

With an audible grinding of teeth, Parker stomped back. No sooner had he done so then Muir reappeared at the edge of the plateau with his claws full of banana leaves dripping with mud.

Despite her discomfort, Shay rolled to her feet and scrambled to Muir. She threw out her arms, as though to hug him, momentarily startling the black bird.

"Mud me."

Behind her, Ryan chuckled, the rich sound reminding her of the smell of coffee.