Twenty-Two: You and Me

The sides of my fist pound on the door in front of me, making loud thudding sounds vibrate off of it. I continue pounding, knowing that he is in there and can hear me. It doesn't matter what time it is, I know he's awake and I know he's in there.

"Open the door!" I shout, probably looking like a mad woman.

I'm thankful for it being nearly two in the morning, otherwise I would have some explaining to do to the neighbors for my frantic actions. Though, if I get any louder I may have explaining to do to the police.

They can call the police on me. It won't do much.

I hear the lock turning and the click of the bolt, meaning someone was on the other side. I put my arms down and step away, waiting for the door to open. When it does finally open, I'm left disappointed when I see it isn't Jace at the door.

"Do you have any idea what time it is?" Caleb asks, his voice groggy as if I woke him up.

"Jace," I say, not being able to form actual sentences at the moment.

"Octavia," Caleb says, his voice trailing at the end. "I really don't think this is a good time."

He is here.

I don't say anything. Instead, I push past Caleb, coming inside his house without being invited. I don't care if Caleb didn't want me here right now. I need to make sure Jace is okay.

"What is she doing here?" A female voice says, stopping me in my tracks.

I turn to where I heard the voice, seeing a woman standing at the bottom of the stairs, her body wrapped tight in a silk robe.

With a black bob hair cut and porcelain skin, I knew this had to be the girl Evan was talking about yesterday at Atomic; Caleb's new girlfriend. From what I have heard, she's apparently as annoying as Caleb.

I don't say anything. I continue to stare her down, analyzing her.

"This is Octavia," Caleb answers for me.

Her face changes from one of annoyance to one of surprise.

"Octavia," she repeats. "I'm Kora."

"Nice to meet you," I force out.

Is she really trying to do introductions when Jace is somewhere in this house probably heartbroken and upset?

"He's in the guest room. Upstairs. Last door on the right," She says, her voice settling down into a more serious tone.

I nod and hurry up the stairs, hearing Caleb and Kora continue to talk from down stairs.

"Do you really think that's the best idea?" I hear Caleb ask, sounding frustrated.

"He's been asking for her."

Asking for me.

I ignore their conversation and hurriedly make my way down the hall, pausing when I get to the last door on the right.

I started to panic and rethought my whole plan - which was to run in and bombarder him with questions.

Haley didn't get to tell me much on the phone. From what I heard, he told Will, who told Haley, who told me that they had broken up and that Kristen kicked him out of their apartment. Will said he went to Caleb's a few hours later.

According to Will, it happened right around ten, right when the phone calls started coming in to me. That meant that I was the first person he called; the first person who was suppose to comfort him.

And I ignored every call.

I don't bother knocking, doubting he could fall asleep that quickly after what has happened tonight.

Pushing the door open, I spot Jace immediately. He's not sitting on the bed, like a normal person would be. He's sitting on the floor, his back pressed against the wall and his knees bent. Resting on his knees is his elbows, arms stretched out in front of him.

I walk in the room, shutting the door behind me as quietly as I could. It's dark, the only light coming in is from the open window, barely illuminating Jace.

When I sit down beside him, I finally notice his face. His cheeks are red and puffy, eyes bloodshot. His hair is a mess, as if he's been tugging and pulling on it.

I lean my head against his shoulder, the most comfort I wanted to offer him until he said something. I'm sitting so close to him that our bodies are touching and I can hear his ragged breaths.

"Do you know how Native Americans got to America first?" I ask, attempting to break the tension.

Jace doesn't say anything, only raising his head up and turning to look at me as a response.

"They had reservations," I answer.

I worry Jace is going to think I'm stupid and want me to leave, but when his lips turn up into a small smile, I feel a sense of accomplishment.

"You're stupid," he says lightheartedly.

"You still love me," I remind him.

"I don't know why."

I broke the tension. Conversation has been made. Now I just need the information.

"Is this what it felt like?" Jace asks, making me lean off his shoulder to look at him. "Is this what it felt like when Ryan left you?"

"What are you feeling?" I ask, wanting him to elaborate.

"Pain. A lot of pain. I think I've cried enough to flood all of Madison," he says.

"Yeah, that's what I felt. And I want to tell you that it's going to get better and it's going to be okay, but that's not how it works," I say, wanting to be truthful with him.

Knowing that Jace has never experienced a breakup before is going to make this even harder. He's been with Kristen since he was seventeen. That's eight years of a relationship. Eight years of being with someone just for them to leave.

The length of the relationship alone is enough to put Jace in a depressive state, but the fact he's never experienced anything like this before is going to make it even more rough for him.

He won't know how to cope. He's going to rely on impulse, rather than logical reasoning. It's going to be messy, and I just want to be here for him.

"How does it work?" He then asks.

"It's different for everyone. Nobody experiences the same heartbreak. Everybody copes with things differently," I explain.

"How did it work for you?" He presses.

Since when did this become my time to reminisce on my own heartbreak?

I figured Jace only wanted something to compare his to, but we have very different situations. Ryan and I weren't together long, nor were we ever living together. We didn't have the same connection he and Kristen had.

"Ryan broke me. He completely shattered me in ways I didn't even no were possible. They say it takes time to get over someone and they were right. I cried a lot. I think for the first month crying was all I could do," I start.

I look up at Jace, noticing how his eyes were transfixed on me, following along with every word I said. He didn't say anything, so I assumed he wanted me to continue.

"Everything reminded me of him, and every time the thought of him popped up in my head I cried. I couldn't watch anything on tv, I couldn't read books, I couldn't even listen to music with out my mind going to Ryan. It lasted for a whole month until I decided I needed to find some better coping methods."

"What were they?" Jace interrupts.

"You guys were. You, Kristen, and Anthony. The more we all hung out, the less time I had to think of Ryan. I kept myself busy. I also talked about it rather than keeping it bottled up. Haley got the most of it, poor thing. Having friends supporting you and being there for you help a lot."

"I didn't even know it was that bad at the time. You always looked happy," Jace tells me.

"I could feel it. I had some preparation. It was still sudden, but I had a hunch it was coming. He couldn't hold me anymore. That's when I realized we were falling apart. The moment he couldn't hold me was the moment I realized his love for me was weakening. I realized words were just words, and love had to be felt. When his hands couldn't touch me the way they used to, I realized I had to teach mine to do the same."

I could feel myself getting emotional. I wanted to comfort Jace, not have him comfort me.

"It's going to take time, Jace. You're going to have sleepless nights and you're going to get frustrated. You're going to try and reach out to her multiple times before you realize it's best to let it go. Don't ever lose faith, though. There's going to be a time where you think love isn't real and it'll never work, but it will. If it's meant to be, it'll be."

Jace doesn't speak, only nodding. I wished he would say something, but he doesn't. I knew silence was always something he fell into when he was feeling any kind of foreign emotion, and I hated it.

Jace and I are opposites. He's calm and collected, while I'm loud and outgoing. He always knew what to say, while I get choked up. He does things without thinking, while I grow anxious.

We're opposites, but opposites always attract, so maybe that means something.

"I love you so much, Jace. I'm always here for you. Always," I tell him.

Jace still doesn't say anything, and I begin to worry even more about him.

I grab ahold of his hand, my thumbs rubbing over his knuckles. I rest my face back on his shoulder, letting the silence consume me as well. Just touching Jace was enough to make me feel better, and I hoped it worked the same way for him.

As time passed, I started to think about Tyler. I didn't even say anything to him before I started frantically getting dressed to come over here. He was still in the shower by time I left, probably excited to have me in his arms tonight. I left without saying a thing, leaving just about everything I brought over to his house there.

I did manage to leave him a note, though with how big of an idiot he is it may take him a while to find it.

A big idiot, but my idiot .

"When did you get over Ryan?" Jace finally says.

When I started to fall for you.

"I don't know the exact point it was. I was falling out of love a little bit at a time. I was starting to see things that I had always associated with him, and I no longer did that. I could see his posts on social media and no longer be affected by it. We still talk from time to time, and every time his name pops up in my phone my heart stops. I still get excited to talk to him, but I don't miss it. I don't long for it anymore in the way that I used to. There was never any specific time where I just knew I didn't love him in the way that I used to," I answer.

Jace takes a deep breath, his chest tightening as he inhales then going back to normal as he inhales. He repeats it three times, something I taught him to do whenever he needed to calm down.

"I need to talk to her. Not to fix things, but to settle them. Sort through all the financial things and get my stuff from the apartment," he tells me.

I nod against his arm, not really knowing what to say.

"I can wait on that, though. Back to my mom's house I go," he says, laughing a bit at the end.

"That is an hour away. Are you sure that's what you want to do?" I ask, thinking about the time I met his mom.

She's a sweet lady, very kind and generous. You can tell how much she loves Jace whenever she talks about him or to him. It's like he's the light of her life. Though, Jace tells me I should see her when his nieces and nephew are around. Grandkids always have a more special place than kids do.

"That's all I really can do. Caleb told me to stay as long as I'd like, but I don't want to intrude," he informs me.

"There's a space open in my building. It's a little pricy, so you may want to consider a roommate, but you've seen my apartment so you already know what it's like," I tell him, hoping he would consider.

"A roommate," Jace repeats. "Will?" He then asks.

"God, no. Move in with your mom, please," I beg, making him laugh.

I'm glad he is laughing and smiling. That's all I needed from him. It hurt me to see him in so much pain. When Jace is hurt he likes to shut down, so I am surprised he has been so open with me tonight.

"I would be the one living with him, not you," he reminds me.

"And with his obsession with Haley, he'd be at my apartment all the time."

"I'd be at your apartment all the time, too. It would be like old times."

Old times.

Jace and I used to spend so much time together. Whether it was at work, or at my apartment, or at Joeli's: we were always together. It didn't matter what we were doing, we just enjoyed being around each other.

Now, whenever we spend time together it seems like it's always in a group function. It's like we can't be alone together anymore. Whether it's my fault for spending so much time with Tyler, or his for dealing with his problems with Kristen, things hadn't been the same.

Sure, he did keep me busy with our gym sessions, but we were focused then. We didn't get to good off and just talk, it was all business and seriousness. Jace took it way more serious than I did, but I guess he just worried about me.

"You trying to say you're obsessed with me?" I jokingly ask, nudging his side with my elbow.

"Just a bit," he grins at me.

Jace leans his head to the side, resting it against mine. I wrap my arm around his bicep, trying to get as close to him as I can.

"Will you stay?" He asks, his voice in a whisper.

I didn't intend on staying. I planned on going back to Tyler, but something told me I needed to stay.

I let go of Jace's hand and lean off of him, looking at his appearance. He still looked rough, but a bit better. The swelling in his cheeks have gone down, and the color is starting to reappear.

"Please stay," he pleads.

I don't answer with my words, but I'm sure Jace can see my answer when I crawl back into his arms, letting him wrap them around me. My face is pressed against his chest, hearing the sounds of his heart beat and nothing else.

"Jace, I hope you find someone who takes care of every beat of your heart," I tell him.

I meant that, too. Jace deserves everything in life. He deserves to find the woman of his dreams and he deserves a family with a bunch of little versions of him running around. He deserves the big house he's always dreamed of, with the family he's always wanted. He deserves the kind of love he gives everyone else.

"No matter what, you and me in the end, right?" He asks, bringing up our promise from before.

"You and me," I confirm.

A/N: you have officially read 59,300 words. remember to vote and comment!! also, since jace is single now who are y'all wanting octavia with now ? i already know who, just wanting to hear y'alls opinions