Ash: Some people are like slinkies. Not really good for much, but bring a smile to your face when you push them down the stairs.

[Later]

Sing: Why are you crying?

Yut-Lung:

Sing: Where'd that bruise come from?

Yut-Lung:

Sing: Did Ash push-

Yut-Lung: He pushed me down the stairs.

□□□

Charlie, video taping a burglar from inside his car: Oh he stealin'. He stealin'.

Burglar, notices: *runs*

Charlie: Oh he st- HEY, GET BACK HERE-

□□□

Yut-Lung: Yes, I shower naked. Call me a slut. I don't care.

□□□

Sing: Hey, Eiji. Did you know that "thot" actually means "thoughtful person"?

Eiji: Oh. I did not know that. I'll keep that in mind.

[Later]

Eiji: Thanks for helping me out, Ash. You're such a thot!

Ash: i'M a WhAt-

□□□

Eiji: He is a bitch. B-I-C-T...H.

□□□

Max: Name an animal with three letters in it's name.

Shunichi: Alligator.

□□□

Ash: *minding his own business*

Eiji: Wow.

□□□

Eiji: Wake up, it's Christmas.

Ash: *goes back to sleep, pulling the blankets over him*

Eiji: Wake up, it's Christmas.

Shorter: *jumps down the stairs* SANTA!

□□□

Golzine: Hey, come here, I want to talk to you. Someday you're gonna grow up and you're gonna be a man.

Ash: Someday you're gonna be dead.

Golzine: *offended and horrified look on his face*

□□□

Sing: Hey, you want something to eat?

Yut-Lung: No. I'm good.

Sing: *buys food*

Yut-Lung: Let me-

Sing, tries to bite Yue's hand: GET YOUR DAMN HANDS BACK-

□□□

Max, calling: Ash!

Ash: Yeah?!

Max: Ash!

Ash: Yeah?!

Jessica: ASH!

Ash: YEAH?! I SAID YEAH-

□□□

Yut-Lung, asking for comfort: Give me a hug!

Sing: No! I feel trapped!

Yut-Lung: Oh.

[Later]

Yut-Lung, locking Sing in a cage: YOU FEEL TRAPPED NOW!

□□□

Yut-Lung: You can say "Have a nice day" and no problem.

Yut-Lung: But you can't say "Enjoy your next twenty-four hours" and not sound vaguely threatning.

Blanca: ....Yut-Lung, it's 3 am.

□□□

Eiji: If there's a "heaven's no" and a "hell yes", why isn't there a "purgatory maybe"?

Shorter: PURGAPS.

□□□

The gang's car, hanging halfway off of a cliff:

Eiji: Oh my God, Ash! Back it up!

Ash, in a calm voice: Really, Eiji? I thought I might drive forward. I thought that might be a fun thing to do.

□□□

Eiji: This says your blood pressure is 420 over 69.

Ash: Nice.

Eiji: You're going to die.

Ash: N i c e.

□□□

Shorter: Hey, so this party is hella lame. Imma head myself out.

Yut-Lung: For the last time, you are being kidnapped.

□□□

Bones: I was eating this Russian chocolate and it made a rattling noise when I shook it and there's a horse magnet inside???

Sing: Russian kinder surprise.

Ash: That looks like it's made of coal.

Bones: It tasted like coal.

Cain: You ate a vase.

Bones: Honestly, at this point, me eating a vase is the least of my problems.

Ash: What the fuck is going on in your life???

□□□

Ash and Eiji: *At the hospital*

Doctor Meredith: Do you abuse drugs?

Ash: You're darn right I abuse drugs. I see a drug, I punch the fuck out of it. Get lost drugs!

Eiji: *Facepalm*

□□□

Yut-Lung: I can't believe this. I thought what we had was special. You protected me at times I couldn't even defend myself. Now all of a sudden, you claim you're "a bodyguard" and that you're just "doing your job."

□□□

Jessica: I like how we say "oh man" to express our disappointment.

Jessica: Because men are so disapointing.

□□□

*Online classes*

Blanca: How can I turn up the volume?

Ash: Press Alt+F4

Blanca: *disconnects*

□□□

Shorter: I hate going for check-ups. The doctor always touches my balls.

Ash: Do all doctors do that?

Shorter: Yeah, man.

Ash:

Ash: Dude, I think Golzine's a doctor-

□□□

Blanca: Tell me something worse than heartbreak.

Sing: When you woke up in the morning and find out your phone wasn't charging.

Ash: When you woke up in the morning.

Yut-Lung: When you woke up.

•
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a/n: sorry if i couldnt update sooner. been feeling really unmotivated rn (i just wanna sleep-). i mean, our summer just started. anyways, how r most of u holding up? remember to always keep safe and healthy at times like these. and stay home. thats it for now guys owo✨