"Green grapes or purple one?"

I looked up at my mom as she held up a bag of green grapes in her left hand and the bag of purple grapes in her right hand. We were currently in Costco buying groceries.

"Grapes? For what?"

"New Years, what do you mean for what."

"Oh," I said, "I didn't know we were gonna do anything this New Years, we normally don't do anything."

"I know but I decided this year should be different. Should we invite your dad?"

"Dad? To the house? Your house?"

"Yes where else?"

"Are you feeling alright?"

"What is that supposed to mean?"

"Well you would never want to invite dad for New Year's."

"That's not true."

"Mom you once threatened to throw the toaster at him if he came too close to the house that one time he dropped Sage and I off after Christmas."

"I was bluffing."

"You had it in your hands when you opened the door for us."

"Oh Lux, you're overanalyzing things."

"I don't know," I say and pause for a moment, "I was actually going to ask you today-"

"What?"

"So Maru is throwing a party-"

"Her parents are throwing a party? Why didn't they tell me? I always invite them over for Thanksgiving. Unless they invited your dad then I would understand. They don't normally like to invite both of us at their home events."

"Actually her parents aren't going to be there."

"What? Then who's supervising?"

"Um-"

"Is Sage going?"

"I'm not sure."

"If he goes then you can go, but you have to be home by one. One-thirty the latest since I know New Years is at midnight. If you're not home by that time I will go over her house and break havoc, understood?"

"Yes ma'am. Thank you."

"Don't say thank you yet, you have to figure out if Sage is going."

"Okay, but still, thank you," I tell her and she smiles whilst rolling her eyes playfully.

"Which should I wear?"

I looked up at Maru as she held two black dresses up. Nat and I were at her house, it was New Year Eve, only a few hours before the party. We had spent most of the morning decorating the house, putting away things that could possibly get broken, and arranging the house in ways so that more people can fit without it getting too crowded.

"The one on the left," I say.

"Oh, I was gonna say right," adds Nat.

"Alright, we all know what we have to do then," sighs Maru.

Nat and I nod before staring at each other and yelling out, "Paper, scissors, rock!"

"Ha," I say when I beat Nat with paper.

"How is it that you always win?" she whines.

"Dude you literally do the same thing each time we do this. First you go scissors, then rock, then scissors again and then you go with paper. Predictable."

"What the fuck, how did you know that?"

I shrug. "I'm observant I guess."

I look at Maru and say, "Okay the left dress it is."

"Okay," she replies, "what are you two wearing?"

Nat holds her finger out as if telling us to wait and searches through her bag before bringing out a pink dress.

"Oh I like it," says Maru and I agree. They then look toward my way and I take out my dress as well.

"Seriously?" says Maru.

"What?" I question.

"That's the dress you wore for Homecoming."

"I know," I say, "but I didn't have time to go shopping and I don't want to wear any of my other dresses because they're more like summer dresses than New Year's."

"You can borrow one of mine," says Maru.

"But-"

"Everyone's already seen you in that dress and you know what my rule is, never wear anything twice at big events. Come I have this blue dress that will look great on you."

In the end I don't wear my Homecoming dress but instead the dress Maru had lent me. We ate lunch, watched a movie, before finally getting dressed for the party.

"I'm so excited," Maru says.

"Me too," I agree.

"Plus I got the one thing this party really needs," she says before opening the mini fridge that is filled with beers and other alcoholic drinks.

"You're gonna drink?" I say.

"Um yeah, that was the whole purpose of this party," she replies.

"Right, but what if someone calls the police."

"Why are you being a party pooper Lux?"

"I'm not, I just know how you get when you're really drunk and I don't want anything to happen to you. I want this party to be fun all night, not for it to be shut down only an hour after it's begun."

"Will you relax? Geez, what's with you? It's just alcohol, you act like you're such a saint and haven't had some before."

She wasn't wrong. There was this one night last year where we all stole a bottle of Gin from Maru's parents and we drank it together throughout our sleep over. But I haven't had some since then.

"Fine," I say, "but we need to find people that will be a DD and I'm not gonna be drinking so I'm gonna keep on a lookout for you."

"Just have fun tonight," she says brushing me off. I turn to Nat with an unimpressed look and she does the same, unsure of what to do or say. With Maru, at times, things can get difficult.

Before it gets more late I take out my phone and text Sage.

Me: You & Ethan coming tonight right?

Sage: Yea, be there soon

With his reply my nerves go down a bit and I sit on the couch and wait for the party to begin. Within an hour and a half the first person arrives followed by other people afterwards along with Sage and Ethan.

"Hey," Sage says, "didn't think this many people would be here by now."

"Me neither," I reply, "Where's Ethan?"

"He went outside, said he had to answer the phone."

"Oh okay."

Minutes pass before Ethan meets with us, a bright smile on his face.

"What's with that smile," I say.

"I just got a call from ASU, I got in."

"No way, congrats!" I say and give him a hug.

"I knew you would get in," Sage says before pulling him close and kissing him.

"Hey guys, getting the kisses ready for tonight?" Maru says, her words coming out in slurs and I can tell she's already been drinking.

"Are you okay?" I ask.

"Ugh Lux relax, I'm just having fun. Geez. So," she says and turns her attention back to the boys with an expectant look.

"Oh, um, well I just got a call from ASU, I'm going there next year," explains Ethan.

"That's so awesome," she slurs and trips as she tries to walk closer to hug Ethan, but luckily he catches her before she falls.

"Maru are-"

She stands up and turns to look at me, annoyed.

"I'm fine, stop worrying about me and have some fun," she snaps.

"What was that about?" asks Sage when she walks away.

"I'm not sure," I reply, "Do you think I'm acting to concerned?"

Sage shrugs. "Just let her be for a while and then check on her. Don't constantly question if she's gonna act that way, just keep your eye on her from afar. If you want we'll keep an eye on her too, since she's already in that state."

"Thanks," I say.

"And maybe have some fun too," he adds, "but not too much."

He gives me a wink before putting his arm around Ethan and pulling him away. The house becomes crowded in no time. I try to relax and let Maru have her fun, taking Sage's advice by watching her from afar.

"Hey."

It's Nat.

"Hey, where'd you go?"

"I hanged out with Maru's dogs for a while," she says.

I let out a laugh.

"You would," I reply.

"And," she says, and suddenly her face reddens a bit.

"What?"

"Do you see that guy over there?" she questions before discreetly pointing at some guy by the kitchen.

"Yeah?"

"Well he asked me for my number."

"What? Who is that?"

"His name is Chris, goes to Eric's school. He found me with the dogs. We talked a little, he seems pretty cool."

"And good looking," I add.

"Yeah," she replies with a smile.

"So what are you doing talking to me instead of him?"

"I'm kinda freaking out over the fact that some cute guy wants to talk to me so I needed a breather to think before I speak and make a fool out of myself."

I playfully roll my eyes at her.

"Go," I say, "he keeps looking this way."

"Okay, I'll talk to you later."

"Yeah," I say and watch as she goes toward his way. She says something to him and he smiles, laughing a bit, before replying to her. I can't help but smile at the scene.

"Please tell me you're not dazing at that guy," someone says beside me and I jump up, startled. I turn around and find Aaron.

"Hey," I say, "you came."

"Wouldn't miss it," he replies and I smile.

"So," he adds, "you weren't dazing at that guy right?"

"Dazing?" I can't help but question, a smirk tugging at the side of my mouth.

"Yeah," he says, "you know looking at him with those big eyes all dreamy and such. A smile on your face and he's all you're focusing on, which is probably why you got scared when I said something."

"Oh," I say and pretend to think, "then in that case, yeah I was dazing at him."

"What? How could you," Aaron replies, pretending to be shocked.

I let out a laugh.

"He's some guy that Nat just met, I was just keeping an eye on her."

"Ah," Aaron replies, "of course, always checking for other's safety."

"Yup, that's me."

"So," I say, "where's-"

"Omar is probably somewhere trying to get girls' numbers and SoHo and Bianca are somewhere here, probably as far away from each other."

"Oh," I reply, "they're still mad at each other?"

"More like in love."

"In love? I mean I knew they had something but they never said they're dating."

"Yeah but that's just an act, probably because they don't want anything to go between their friendship. But they're both in love with each other, always been that way since I've met them. They're just too stubborn to admit it."

"Oh, I see. That sucks though, if they want to be together, they should get together," I say and as soon as I do I wish I didn't. Aaron merely smiles and an awkward tension builds up between us.

"So," I say trying to break the ice, "you're not drinking tonight?"

"No," he says, "I'm the DD."

"Cool," I reply.

That didn't break the tension at all.

"Do you want to play," he says and points over to the people playing beer pong.

"Oh I'm not drinking tonight."

"We don't have to drink alcohol Lux," Aaron says with a smile.

"Oh, well I've never played so I'm pretty sure I'm the last person you want to ask."

"Come, I'll teach you."

"I'm fine, I-" I don't have a chance to say anymore before Aaron grabs my hand and pulls me to table. It seems as if the people at the table know Aaron, if not then I underestimated his social skills, because it seemed as if they were already friends.

Aaron and I group up at one side of the table and two guys named Manny and David stand on the other side. We fill our cups with apple juice while the boys fill theirs with beer and we set them up. Aaron explains the rules to me briefly before we begin. My first attempt to get the ball in the cup failed as I threw it too hard. I drink the apple juice, suddenly feeling competitive. Aaron easily get the ball in and I glare at him slightly since I didn't get mine in. As time goes on, I finally make the ball in on my fourth try. I jump up excitedly, feeling accomplished even though I know that Aaron and the boys on the other side have done better than me already. Aaron and I don't win, with two cups left behind.

"Cheer up," Aaron says when he sees the frown I make when Manny makes the ball in his last cup.

"I get really competitive, probably should've prepared for this."

Aaron lets out a laugh.

"You did good for your first time. We can play again if you want."

"Yeah that would be-"

My voice is cut off when I hear yelling coming from the other side of the room. Aaron and I snap our heads from where the yell came from.

"You're such a fucking slut," Bianca yells, "And you're a fucking asshole."

"Can you calm the fuck down? Jesus Christ, who said he was your property?"

The words came from Maru. The clothes she wore were messily on her hair was a mess. She was slouching in front of Bianca and from the way I heard her voice, she was more drunk that ever. On the other side of her stood a shirtless SoHo.

"Are you fucking kidding me? I'm going to kill you, you stupid-"

"Bianca relax," SoHo interrupts.

She turns and looks at him. She's glaring at him hard, and if I didn't know her I'd say she's only seconds from killing them both. But at that moment, as I stare at her, I know she's more hurt than angry. I'm not sure when I started walking, but within seconds I find myself beside them. I watch as a tear slides down Bianca's face and I immediately place my hand on her shoulder.

She turns to look at me, stunned, and it is the first time I see her so vulnerable.

Without a world I grab her hand and pull her away from the scene, knowing this is what needs. An escape.

Suddenly I am pulled back and I turn to find Maru.

"Are you seriously taking her side?" she replies, her breath reeking of alcohol.

I push her hand away from me and say, "Yes," before walking off with Bianca.

We walk to the front of the house where there are no people. I stand in front of her, unsure of what to say. Before I get a chance to think of something a sob comes out from her mouth and within seconds she's crying. I grab her and give her a hug, letting her cry on my shoulder. Minutes pass as she cries, and after a while she stops.

"You didn't have to do that," is the first thing she tells me, her voice hoarse.

"I know, I wanted to."

"Thank you, Junior."

"No problem, I-"

"I mean it," she says, "if it weren't for you I probably would've just stood there longer looking like a fool. I misjudged you from the beginning."

"What are friends for," I say.

She gives me a weak smile.

"Do you want to talk about it?"

"And say what? The guy I've liked since sixth grade was having sex with some random girl and I overreacted."

"You didn't overreact," I reply.

"You and SoHo obviously had something, I could tell even when I didn't know you two that well."

"Yeah," she says, "it's called being friends with benefits."

"Why weren't you guys more," I ask but immediately say afterwards, "You don't have to answer that."

"It's fine. Maybe I should talk about it. And honestly I don't know. I'm scared of ruining what we have? I know it sounds stupid but I just don't want to lose him. I've had friends come and go before, but not him, he's always stayed. And then I met Aaron and Omar and it finally felt like I found myself the right friends. But the feelings I had for SoHo just kept growing and well, now we're here."

"You know what impression you give to others? That you're a badass. And you are, I've seen it at first hand. Don't let a boy break you. I know you and SoHo have history and have gone through so much. And you guys care about each other. But, if he doesn't treat you the way you deserve. If he's not willing to put an effort into what you guys have and take that final step so that you guys can be together, then he's not worth it. No matter how much you think he is, if he doesn't treat you the way you want to be treated, then in the end, he really isn't."

"You sure do give some good love advice for having some love trouble yourself, you know."

"Love trouble?"

"Don't play dumb, I see the way you and Aaron stare at each other."

"Aaron and I are not-"

"And there's your mistake. You're in denial."

I let out a sigh. "I'm not ready to take that step either," I admit.

"I think you should," Bianca says, "because learning from experience, you don't always get the guy if you keep waiting. Besides Aaron's a good guy. He acts like an asshole because he's afraid of getting judged by people. But he's a really good guy, and somehow you've broken that line in which he's made from acting like himself to acting like the asshole he wants people to think he is. If you're not ready yet, then that's fine. But don't be like me and wait forever. I'll see you around Junior."

"Where are you going?"

"Home, probably gonna buy a pizza first though."

"Text me so that I know you're okay."

"Sure," she replies before walking away.

I watch as she walks to her car and drives away. I turn around, ready to go back inside but I bump into Sage.

"Hey," I say, "Are you okay?"

"Can I have the keys to your car?"

"What?"

"The keys. I need to leave. Now."

"What happened?"

"Lux please just give me your keys."

Confused I reach in my pocket and take out my keys, handing it to him.

"Where's your car?" I ask.

"I came with Ethan."

"Where's Ethan?"

"I have to go," is all he says without explanation before leaving.

I go back inside and find Aaron.

"Hey," he says.

"Have you seen Ethan?"

"Your brother's boyfriend?"

"Yeah."

"I think I saw him leave sometime while we were playing beer pong. Why? Is Bianca okay?"

"Sage left and took my car and I'm wondering why he didn't leave with Ethan. As for Bianca I'm not sure. She seemed okay after I talked to her, but she's hurting."

"I know, what SoHo did was big dick move and I'm kick his ass for that."

I nod.

"What's wrong?"

"I'm still thinking of Sage. He seemed really weird. He wasn't drunk, he was talking normal and stuff but I'm just worried."

"Do you want me to take you home?"

"Can you please?"

"Yes, let's go."

"Thank you," I say and walk with Aaron back outside and to his car. The drive home takes about fifteen minutes, at times Aaron asks me if I'm warm enough or if it is too cold, I simply tell him that I am fine, my mind mostly on Sage.

When we arrive to my dad's house I see my car and sigh in relief.

"Oh thank god," I mumble, "thank you Aaron." I take off my seat belt and am about to open the door but Aaron tells me to wait. I turn and look at him, confused.

"Yeah?" I reply.

He purses his lips and scratches the back of his head.

"Lux, I need to tell you something."

"Yes?"

"I, um," his words trail off and he groans. "I'm not good with words so I'm just gonna go for it."

"Go for wha-"

Aaron presses his lips against mine. He kisses me hard at first, his hand on my cheek, pulling me closer to him, but eventually his kisses get softer, more delicate. And it feels so surreal, like I'm in dream. And I kiss him back with the