Sierra

The next day I wasn't feeling too great. After that long sleep I took at Kaydon's place, I just felt dead the whole day. On the way to school, the drive with Kaydon in the car was oddly comfortable.

Coach let off practice, well, Parker forced her to. Most of the girls felt sick as hell. Our best hitters were throwing up crazy last night and I felt terrible.

I grab my lunch bag from my locker and started heading down the stairs to the cafeteria. The cold air gives me goosebumps down my arms even though I'm wearing a tight black long sleeve. I'm wearing Kaydon's dark grey sweats but rolled up in a way where it looks natural and I have my white zip up that blocks the back of the sweatpants.

I reach the loud and crazy cafeteria and I grab a water bottle on the way to the table. I'm usually the first one at our table but this time I'm the last one.

"There you are!" Cameron smiles at me. She looks more cheery today but I can see she's a bit pale. Kaydon moves over for me to have room and I gladly sit on the end where I can get up easily.

"Where were you?" Blake asks, yanking a bag of chips out from his backpack.

"Somewhere," I mumble. I wasn't in the mood to talk because of how nauseous I felt. I want to go home and curl up in a ball while watching Mean Girls.

Parker dramatically gasps, "No way, really?"

"I just thought you got taken by some killer clowns!" she says sarcastically and I throw a piece of my cookie at her.

"I just don't feel good." I say, nibbling on my cookie. Kaydon sees the crumbs falling down to my- his sweatpants and he brushes it off.

"Still?" Ty asks. I nod and everyone gives me sympathetic looks. Everyone was in conversation while I just lean on the palms of my hands and close my eyes.

I feel a pat on the shoulder and I turn to see Kaydon handing me a cup. I take it and looked in it to see my tea in the cup. I give him a gracious smile and gladly took a sip.

I'm telling you, tea works wonders!

Kaydon excused himself to get his things for his next period and everyone then turned their eyes at me. I let go of the straw in my mouth and looked at them confusingly.

"What?"

Ty starts whistling and Cameron gives me that "you know" look.

Blake swiftly moves over on next to me. "So, you and lover boy here." he wiggles his eyebrows and I smack him away.

"It's not like that." I groan and they all gawk at me like I'm crazy.

"Didn't he take you to his house yesterday, made you your favorite tea in the history of teas, and literally gave you his sweatpants to wear?" Cameron adds. They all look at me like I'm crazy.

"We're just friends." I mutter and Ty shakes his head.

"Friends my ass, you both look at each other like lovesick puppies." he then licks his sucker that's in his mouth. I fight the urge to slap it out of his mouth and just shoved the other whole cookie in my mouth.

"You're still following those rules?" Parker looks at me and I nod. Her and Cameron groan but Ty and Blake stare at us with confusion.

He never told them about the rules.

"What rules?" Ty asks. I shake my head but he keeps on insisting.

Parker explained it for me and Blake and Ty complain to me about the whole thing. I know, it's stupid! They both keep on telling me that I am very dumb for that. I just nod along.

"What in the world were you thinking when you said that rule? You knew that you both would come together again like you guys were before!" Blake gives me a slight shove and I hang my head.

I didn't want this conversation at all. My head aches and my body feels like it needs to lay down. Kaydon and I will never be more than friends again. I can't put myself through that shit again, plus I need to focus on volleyball. He has football later on and he needs to focus on himself too.

The group got quiet and I look up to see them all looking at me with worried looks.

"Look, Si. We worry about you two." Parker says quietly, resting a hand atop of mine.

"You two used to be so, so close. Now you both act like soulmates for one second then strangers the next."

I know she's right, I see it. I fucking feel it. It isn't him I'm blaming, okay? I'm blaming myself. I'm making things like this and I have to deal with it. Dealing with this is like no other.

I'm confused, I'm lost.

Real feelings don't go away and I'm starting to realize that they never did go away. They just had a stop whenever he left.

"I just don't want him to go through the whole fiasco shit again," I finally say after a couple moments. Blake rests his arm on my shoulder for assurance and I just stare at my hands in my lap.

"You guys can work it out. Just please for the love of god, talk and laugh like you guys used to. I miss your guys' cackles." Cameron laughs at the end and I do too.

"We have time," I say. Blake and Ty look away too quickly but I ignore it.

We start talking about back then and the weirdest memories we had. I definitely remember the time Ty and I reenacted Titanic and the time Kaydon and I sang karaoke together.

Parker tells us her stories about her almost burning down her house while trying to make enchiladas with her grandma.

I was mid-laughing when Kaydon came back, sitting in between me and Blake. I smile at him and his eyes widened a bit before returning a grin back at me.

"What did I miss?" he asks me and I almost say, a lot, but I catch myself. Better not to tell him everything we just talked about. Especially our rules.

I shake my head, nodding at Parker. "Her getting whooped for almost burning down her house." Parker gives us a sly smirk and Kaydon chuckles. I take a look at the dimples on the side of his cheek and how messy his hair is at the moment. It's perfect.

Ty and Cam gives me a quick smirk and Parker winks. They know I'm staring and I flip them off while scratching my nose.

Blake interrupts us, thankfully. "You also missed us talking about karaoke night." he says proudly and Kaydon glances at me before looking back at Blake.

"Shit, I remember. Si and I beat all of you all the time!" I laugh at the very clear memory in my head.

When Whitney Houston's I Will Always Love You played, Kaydon and I would burst out belting this song from the heart. Passion, I would say.

I retell the story and everyone laughs before the bell starts ringing, signaling our next class. For the first time since this morning, I didn't feel nauseous at all.

I feel good. I feel good to start becoming friends with Kaydon again. I feel good about volleyball. Importantly, I feel good about what I'm feeling. I'm feeling hope.

**

a/n

unedited

i hate this chapter AAA. i just wanted a chapter where the group talked with each other, yk!?!?

sigh, BUT THE NEXT ONE WILL BE BETTER!

have a good day/night!! :)

-s