Hello fellow Wattpad readers! Megan here, and if you're one of my readers already, let me just say thank you for taking a chance on my story when there are literally MILLIONS of other stories for you to choose from. Thank you for the comments, the votes and the love you gave to the first, extremely rough draft, of Back To You (formerly Stay With Me). If you're a new reader and came here hoping to start a new book, I'm sorry. I deleted all the previous parts because it's no longer the story I want to write and I want you all to see it with fresh eyes :) But I have good news! I'm in the process right now of completely rewriting, editing and changing the original.

I started writing it as a suggestion from my therapist to help process my divorce. See, in May of 2016 I began the very difficult, very ugly process of separating from my husband of two-and-a-half years. You might be thinking, "Meg...that wasn't very long at all. Why'd you lose your shit?" but we were together a total of seven years and one of the worst parts of it was one day I was married and the next day I was literally packing everything I owned and moving back into my parents' house. One day I had a husband and the next I was being told to, and I quote, "get your shit and get the f&*% out of my house." That began the horrible and demoralizing process of rearranging my entire life. Everything I had known for seven years, and the future I had planned had completely changed.

To say I didn't handle it well would be the understatement of the century for me. At first I lived in utter shock, telling myself I was fine and better off without him. I faked relief and happiness to friends and family because that was easier than facing reality. I galivanted around the country for work as a distraction, but the second that distraction ended and the actuality of my situation hit, I tumbled to the ground like a Jenga tower. I became severely depressed. I had constant nightmares and would wake up in a sweat. My anxiety was through the roof and I couldn't even perform daily functions without feeling like I was trudging through quicksand. After about a week or two of feeling like I'd rather be dead than live with the pain any longer, I tried to end my life. Thankfully, I scared myself and stopped before I was able to do any real damage, but the fact is I had googled "easiest ways to kill myself" and I'd tried.

After that I spent six days in the psych ward of a local hospital, and fourteen days in an outpatient center where I was put on medication and went through intense, extensive therapy. I saw my own therapist twice a week and a psychiatrist once a month. A few weeks after it all happened, and I was well enough to only have to see my own therapist, I had to face my ex-husband in court, and I was okay when I saw him. Trying to end my life was not the way out of my pain, but gave me the opportunity to get the help I severely needed.

The reason I'm telling you all of this is because my story is loosely based on what happened to me. Names, locations and some situations have been changed and slightly rearranged, but the bones of Delaney (the new main character) have remained the same. When I wrote the original draft, I shied away from all of the ugliness I'd gone through because I was too scared to expose myself. It felt too vulnerable. I didn't think people would be able to relate to her or the story, or that they'd think she was too broken to want to get to know. I didn't think anyone would want to read it. It also brought up a lot of memories I'd buried, but in order for me to put out my best work, and for it to be the therapy I need, I need to be vulnerable as fuck.

I want to give you my best. I want to give you a story that makes you laugh and cry. A story that makes you smile like a goofball to yourself and get frustrated because the characters aren't doing something or reacting in a way you approve of. I want to give you characters you will absolutely fall in love with, as I have through countless stories on Wattpad. I want to give you a story that makes you love love, and if you're in a position similar to mine, a story that helps you get through something you feel you might not survive. If I can help one person with my story, that'll be enough for me.

*After completing the book and having some comments left about confusion as to why she is the way she is in the beginning, please understand that Delaney spent 7 years in a mentally, emotionally and verbally abusive relationship. That kind of abuse happens slowly over time. A person doesn't change their behavior overnight. She is mentally in a place where she believes her husband is the greatest thing in the whole world and everything she has in life is because of him. When you're in a relationship like that for a long time, you need space and time to get out of that mindset and recover - for your mind to become healthy again. I understand you want to shake her in the beginning, but she deserves patience and space to grow. She's not perfect in the beginning, or in the end, frankly. If you cannot give her time to grow, that's fine, but please don't leave derogatory comments about her mindset or say she's stupid and weak. If you can't be patient and understanding, all I ask is that you simply move on. 

Side note: I am not at all claiming to be a victim here, (I actually despise when people paint themselves as the victim). I was just as much to blame for my marriage ending as my ex-husband was. I made mistakes. I said and did things I regret. I wasn't perfect. My story is my story though and I want to focus more on what happened after as opposed to what caused the marriage to fail in the first place. I encourage comments, votes and conversations between authors, but I will write it as I see fit and if at any time you do not feel like you are relating to the characters or just not enjoying the story, I ask that you kindly move on without posting nasty comments or trashing the characters choices or decisions. I know asking people to be kind on Wattpad can sometimes be like asking a politician to be honest, but we've gotta give it our best shot, right?

Trigger Warning: I can't believe these are actually a thing now, but here we are. This story involves infidelity, talk of suicide attempt, mental health, depression and anxiety.

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Thank you, thank you, thank you!