I S A B E L L A

After a lot of convincing, Abby finally convinced me to go to Jack's party with her.

Her big brown eyes trailed my figure as i stepped a few steps back from the mirror in her room. I stared at myself through it, it was slightly out of my comfort zone considering i was wearing Abby's dress.

The black fabric reached to my mid-thighs, it had circles cut out on each side leaving my hips exposed. Even though it had a small turtle neck my cleavage was also cut out leaving it also exposed. And although the dress made me feel good about myself that quickly died down when Abby opened her mouth.

"I guess it will have to do" She mumbled. I looked back at her, she wore a glittery black dress, it had just about reached to her thighs. The dress wrapped around her body and i couldn't help but compare myself to her.

She had a nicer everything, a nicer cleavage, a nicer ass, nicer hair, a nicer body.

I had almost let out a scoff but held it in. When this 'friendship' had first blossomed, i had just started high school. I had no friends, i had bad grades and my family was falling apart. I was so alone, and was willinging to do anything to make it all go away and forget. I was a desperate girl, so when Abby decided to sit next me in chemistry class i felt needed. Wanted.

With that popular girl, sassy voice she invited me to hang out with her. Blinded by the thought of a real friendship i had accepted to hang out with her. At first it was good, we had lunch everyday and slept over at each other's houses almost every weekend. And for once i had someone to talk too, someone to lean on and someone to open up too. It was all so good, until she had started involving herself with the wrong people. Boys and girls who partied every weekend and sold drugs.

I told her it was not good, she said she'll be fine and that they are good people. Then before i knew it, we had lunch every other day and sleepovers every other weekend. Then we had lunch once a week, and sleepovers once a month. Then it just stopped, we stopped having lunch, we stopped having sleepovers, we stopped hanging out. It was like that for a few months until she told me how sorry she was for abandoning me. And yet again the idea of a friendship had blinded me and i forgave her. Only this time it was different, she laughed at me infront of others, she made me insecure about everything that i did. From what i ate in the morning to how ugly i looked.

And it has stayed like that for 3 years.

We are now on our last year of highschool, and now i find myself dreading to hang out with her. I find myself ignoring her messages. And i find myself rather being alone than being with her, just because of how she makes me feel. But its as if there is not escape in this friendship, no matter how bad i want to scream at her i can't. No matter how bad i want to leave this friendship to end i can't. She has made me feel like i need her in my life.

And i know i don't, i don't.

So why can't i just let her go? Why can't i yell at her and tell her to stay out of my life? . Why can't i stand up for myself? Why do i let her bring me down? Why do i let her force me to go to parties where i know ill be made fun off?

I push away the thoughts and take one last long look at myself, pushing my hair behind my shoulder i look back at Abby. She has her arms crossed across her chest and was sending me a nasty scoul followed with an eye roll.

"Are you done staring at yourself?" her temper sparked.

I hum a yes slightly annoyed at her comment and follow her out of her house, where a black car with tinted windows stood. Music blasted all around it and although the windows were tinted you could tell at least 3 people were already in there.

As we approach the car the window rolls down, and just like i said, 3 people sat in the car- in the front seat sat Jake, and in the back sat 2 other boys who i had assumed were Jake's friends.

The smell of alcohol whipped my face like a cold breeze when i opened the back door. I awkwardly sat down next to the two strangers in the back, who had wide grins plastered on their faces and were clearly drunk.

"Now who's this new chick?" asked one of the guys who sat next to me whilst nodding their head in my direction.

"Abby's loner friend" Jake replied starting the car, I heard Abby silently giggle.

Already regretting getting into the car, or even agreeing on this i turn my head to the window and stare out of it as Jake and the strangers scream out song lyrics and pass Abby alcohol before the party has even started.

I glance at Abby and Jake who are grinning at each other and flirting. I should've known we are going to this stupid party over a boy. I mean he left his own party to pick us up, i should've figured it out then.

After a little while of blasting songs and driving we finally arrived at the party. The house was big, it stood tall with 3 stories and neon lights bursting out the big windows. People walked in and out of the house, some people were already drunk and vomiting everything they had in their system. Others were inside the house dancing their hearts out. Whilst others were feeling each other up and eating each other's faces off like there aren't hundreds of people in the same room.

Play with Fire was echoing through the house as i stepped in and i couldn't help but accept the drink that was being handed to me by Abby the minute i placed my purse down.

I can feel free for one night, just one night.

I take the shot and drink it, immediately feeling the burning sensation of alcohol running down my throat.

"About time you live a little." Abby shouts over the music before taking Jake's hand and swaying away into the crowd of dancing bodies.

Sitting down on a stool, i watch them dance for a while, until I lose them in the crowd. Shaking my head, i stand from my stool and attempt to look for the bathroom.

"Excuse me!" i shout as i stumble through the dancing crowds. The bodies press themselves around me and i find myself pushing at them to get out of the crowd.

Once i finally make it, i begin walking down the long halls of the mansion and looking for the bathroom.

Opening a door, the first thing i see is a women grinding on top of a man. I quickly slap my hand over my face and gasp as the couple both whip there faces towards me.

"Jesus! Lock the door!" i shout before running out the room and slamming the door behind them.

I continue searching for the bathroom, it feels like a mission. This house is so huge i find myself lost in it.

Stopping in my tracks i find the courage to walk up to a couple and politely ask where is the bathroom. The girl nods and with a smile she tells me where to go and i thank them both before walking away.

Once i make it to where they told me to go, i groan when there is a line outside the bathroom. No longer than 3 people, but there still a line.

The person at the front bangs on the door and shouts "What are you doing in there? Taking a shit?"

Still when there is no reply, all 3 off them huff and stomp away in a look out for a empty bathroom.

I decided to wait, considering this is the only bathroom i know. But my patients gets the best of me and i begin to knock on the door.

"Hello? Are you okay in there?" i call out pressing my ear to the door. I sigh when there is still no reply. I lean on the wall next to the door and wait a few minutes longer. But after what felt like hours but was actually 5 minutes I started banging on the door.

"Hurry up!" i shout once again, when the sound of the door handle starts to rattle i stand a few steps back and watch as the door cracks open and reveals the same guy that was outside my coffee shop this morning.

He stood tall, his blue eyes were bloodshot red and his hair was slightly messy. He had changed clothes to a leather jacket and a tight off-white shirt. He wore black jeans that were slightly baggy.

I open my mouth to speak but he beats me to it.

"Jesus, i'm out for fuck sake." he snarled, I stood up straight before replying.

"I'm sorry, you were taking forever." i quietly replied.

"I didn't think i'd ever see you again." i added and gave him a short smile.

"I hoped i wouldn't."

I scrunched my eyebrows and rolled my eyes, i hoped he was only rude this morning because he had a tough night, but i guess being rude was just his whole personality. 

I scoffed before beginning to walk away, but i didn't make it far when his voice stopped me.

"Don't you need the bathroom? you seemed like you were bursting." He slightly smirked. I slowly turned around, he was now lighting up a cigarette. He stared at me as he sucked on it and blew the smoke out.

"I've lost the urge." I replied building up the courage to look at those blue eyes that were trailing my body. His gaze sent shivers down my spine and i felt my arm hair stick up. He hummed before placing the cigarette in his mouth and kicking off the wall. He began to make his way towards me and brushed my shoulder with his when he walked passed.

He had a comforting antiseptic fragrance smell mixed with the faint smell of a cigarette,i only smelt it for a second when he brushed past me, but at that moment all i wanted to do is pull him back close to me to smell it again. It was so comforting i wanted to drown in the smell. But instead i watched him continue to walk down the hall with long strides whilst smoke lingered around him.

And when his figure was now gone and i stood alone in the quiet hallway i mentally cursed at myself when i realised.

I forgot to ask for his name.

~~~

Thank you for reading!

Hope you're enjoying the book so far, not the best writer but i'm working on it!

-K