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  I S A B E L L A

I tried my hardest not to feel insecure. In a tight sports bra and leggings i felt more exposed than usual.

I knew i shouldn't put myself down, i knew it was just my mind being weird. I knew the gym i was going to with Lucy was probably going to have other girls dressed like me. But my brain decided to overthink today.

I stared at my face in my bathroom mirror, my hands gripping the sink as i examined all of my features and flaws. From my perfectly slicked back hair that was tied up into a ponytail to my round lips that were resting in a straight line, matching the way i felt inside. I tilted my head up, getting a clear view of my neck, were purple marks that were practically gone sat. And my burnt neck that was almost healed apart from a little blister and a pink mark.

I looked at my eyelashes that i wished were longer, i looked at my nose that i wish was a little smaller, i looked at my cheeks that i wished weren't so chubby. I looked at my frame and wished i wasn't so tall.

And then i closed my eyes.

I inhaled air through my nose and breathed out through my mouth, repeating it a few times until my grip on the sink wasn't so tight.

Then i told myself i was pretty, before i opened my eyes and looked at myself once more.

But this time i told myself what i liked.

I liked my forest green eyes, and the freckles sprinkled on my nose, i liked this hairstyle.

And then i took a step back, my hands releasing the grip on the sink as i did and lazily let them fall to my sides. I looked at the outfit i wore, black sports leggings and a blue sports bra. I liked the outfit, i just wasn't sure if i liked it on me.

But i was only learning self love, and one thing i've learnt so far is that its okay to have those days you just need to remind yourself that you're beautiful.

So i forced myself to smile and like the outfit. I picked up the blue cropped zip up jumper that was thrown over a chair and put it on, leaving it unzipped.

I loved blue, it was my favourite color. It was known as a sad color, a masculine color, a color that was supposed to be darker than the others. But to me it was the prettiest, there was more behind the color than 'sad'. It was a color that complemented many things and people, it was a color i felt most attached to. It was a color that drew me in. It was not the color that's just 'sad' it had so much life in it. For me blue is a cheery colour, one of honesty and life - for it is the colour of our oceans and skies.

A ping sound vibrated from my phone, a light flashing from it as a notification popped up on the screen. I slightly bent over, reading the message from Lucy that had read she was here.

I dashed out the room, kicking on my shoes and tying them in loose knots before locking my apartment door and running down the stairs as a bag was on my shoulders and my hands held a small and fragile device.

I stepped outside, the sun hit me in the eyes and with an instinct I brought a hand up to block the rays of sun. There was no wind, making the unbearably hot weather feel even hotter. I was now beginning to regret wearing leggings.

I spotted the Lilac Convertible that belonged to Lucy straight away. She had the roof down and was waving me over. Her black wavy hair was down draping over her exposed shoulders, she had a black pair of sunglasses on and even from here i could tell she was wearing the same gym set as me but in the color Purple.

She smiled, showing me her white teeth. I couldn't help but smile back at my best friend, who looked so excited to see me.

"Hey, Love!" Lucy shouted over the music blasting from her car. I opened the passenger door, throwing my bag into the back seat before climbing into the car.

"Hey!" I laughed, pulling off the jumper i wore and throwing it in the back with my bag and put on my seatbelt after

"You look stunning! That hairstyle suits you, and don't even let me begin on your body in that set." She rambled on before starting the engine.

There is something about hanging out with Lucy that makes me feel so safe. I can look like i was dragged through mud and she'd still make me feel pretty with her compliments. Not to mention, she is the most understanding and non-judgemental person i have ever met. I admired her. I was so lucky to have her, because now that i do i don't think i could be able to live without her.

I thanked Lucy, giving her a few compliments in return that made her smile. If there was anyone in the world i loved more than the color blue it was Lucy Roberts.

"I'm a little nervous, i've never been to a gym before, and i'm not strong." I said, as i looked at the view of the beautiful city that i loved so much during summer.

The car slowed down as we came to a red light. "Don't be, everybody is super nice, and we aren't doing anything hard I'll teach you a few things and maybe you'll find that you enjoy it and then you can come with me all the time." Lucy reassured me, smiling to herself at her own idea.

"I'm sorry, I'm always overthinking." I chuckle uncomfortably, Lucy shakes her head and turns to look at me at the same time.

"Don't be sorry, there's nothing wrong with that."  The light turns green and she smoothly places a foot on the pedal causing the car to move slowly at first before speeding off. Our hair flew back in the air, the song Don't Blame Me By Taylor Swift  played in the back as i continued looking out into the beautiful view, the smell of summer filling my nostrils as i watched the trees, how they sway in the warming breeze.

One red light and two songs later we were pulling into the gym's parking lot. No more than fifteen cars were parked, and when the car stopped and the music cut off i undid my seat belt and stretched my body out to reach for my belongings in the back.

With the push of a button the roof of the car was back on, a beep came from the car indicating it locked. We walked silently to the entrance, and walked in when the doors automatically opened.

A short lady with brunette hair stood at the reception behind the desk. She was in a pair of cycling shorts and a tank top, her face covered in freckles followed by long eyelashes. Her thick lips stretched into a polite smile when she heard us step in.

"Hey Lucy!" She greeted Lucy, Lucy was friends with many people at the gym considering she came here almost everyday. The pretty brunette greeted me after, before i blocked out there conversation and inspected the building.

The walls were white, with a clean black carpet that covered all the floor underneath our feet. There was a glass wall, giving you a clear view of everyone in the gym and all the heavy equipment. Besides a water dispenser and toilets that was pretty much it.

I watched as a buff guy lifted weights that looked heavier than his own body weight, his face and neck were bright red and thick veins bulged out his arms as he lifted them. The further he lifted the more he got exhausted. When he couldn't anymore, his friend that stood behind him helped him lift the weight off him.

Let's hope Lucy isn't forcing me to do that.

I tuned back into the conversation when it was coming to an end, Lucy thanked the girl before telling me to follow her. She pushed at the glass door and walked into the gym, with me following her tail.

Music played, and the sound of chatter was the first thing i heard. For a room full of sweaty people it smelled rather refreshing. But the further we walked through the gym the more nervous i grew, people started at me like i didn't belong here. Some people nodded at Lucy in their own way of greeting her.

"They are only staring because they've never seen you here, especially such a pretty girl like you." Lucy said, winking at me as she looked over her shoulder whilst walking. I simply nodded, biting the inside of my cheek and snaking my fingers around the material off my bag strap before gripping onto it harshly as a nervous habit.

I smiled at a few people that walked past, getting almost every time a smile in return. We walked until we reached the treadmills by the window. There was a pretty view of mountains far from the city, the sky was clear of clouds and cars zoomed past from far away.

Lucy dropped her bag by a treadmill, and i dropped mine next to hers.

"Okay let's start off easy, we will walk at first for a bit and then move up from there." She said, her hands on her hips as she searched my face for approval.

"Okay sounds good." I replied, she nodded and walked over to my treadmill.

"Okay so this button is just a walking level-" She pointed at a button that had a '2' printed on.

"And this bu-" I didn't even listen to the rest of the sentence, due to a familiar face catching my attention. A face i shouldn't be surprised to see here but oddly am.

Axel's 6 foot 5 body was about twelve feet from me. The first thing that I noticed was his size. He cast a shadow that nearly filled the room. His white shirt fit him perfectly and as such you could tell that he was an athletic man. You don't get in that shape without spending a lot of time in a gym. He stood in front of a large mirror that covered the entire wall, his head was thrown back as he drank water from a plastic bottle. I could see his sharp jaw and adam's apple that was bobbing up and down through the mirror as he took large gulps. Sweat covered his chest and back, his hair was slightly wet from the sweat and looked like he had ran his fingers through it a few times.

It was like every time i saw him, the more attractive he got.

And the more attractive he got, the more i couldn't tear my eyes away from him.

"Are you listening to me?" Lucy's voice was slightly raised causing me to snap my eyes away from him. I hadn't even realised i was practically drooling over him and not listening to anything Lucy was saying.

"Sorry i got distracted." I replied, causing Lucy to sigh.

"Okay, ill explain again but listen this time." She pointed her pointer finger at me and raised her eyebrows, i giggled and nodded a few times.

This time i listened to the instructions she was telling me, only uncontrollably glancing at Axel a few times. He had wireless headphones in, and stood on his phone for two minutes before placing his phone and almost empty bottle down onto a bench.

When Lucy was finished talking, we both stepped onto the treadmill and clicked the button that said '2' The treadmill began to move under me causing my feet to move with it.

Me and Lucy walked together in sync, she passed me one of her airpods and i put it in my left ear.

We listened to music as we walked on the treadmill, i tried to look anywhere but Axel but my eyes always seemed to find him.

He was doing pull ups. Axel made it look so easy as he pulled himself up to the bar and dropped over and over again. I couldn't help but notice the way the muscles on his arm flexed or how you could almost see thru his shirt his attractive back.

It was ridiculous, even his back was attractive.

"You're drooling" Lucy chimed in, interrupting my thoughts. My eyes grew wide and i could feel my face heat up, embarrassed by the fact Lucy had caught me staring at Axel.

Lucy laughed "Don't be embarrassed, even i can admit he is ridiculously hot." She whispered.

See, he is ridiculous.

Ridiculously attractive.

Ridiculously hot.

Ridiculously breathtaking.

Ridiculous.

"I wasn't drooling." I lied, Lucy's hair was now tied into a low ponytail as she laughed at my comment.

"Yes you were."

"No i wasn-" She cut me off before i could finish.

"Yes you were, now hit the button '5' to jog. " She ordered, and i scoffed deciding to leave it before clicking on the jog button.

For the next ten minutes we jogged i didn't dare look at Axel once, i was here to be with Lucy, not to watch him work out.

By the time we were finished on the treadmill, i was sweating buckets. My legs felt dead, and this was only the start. Not even a minute after getting off, Lucy dragged me to the weights.

Not only was i now almost six feet away from Axel, i was having to do something with weight and after seeing the man earlier i would rather die.

Lucy laughed at my worried expression. "Don't worry we aren't doing anything heavy, it's only your first time."

She picked up two small weights and handed them to me, one in each hand, i sighed in relief when the weights were only slightly heavy. Then, for the next five minutes Lucy taught me how to do squats correctly with the weight in my hands.

I copied her moves until i did it correctly, then we both did it. I watched myself in the mirror in front of me, my eyes shifting to Axel behind me once again when i felt him move.

I regreted looking at him, because when i did he was already looking at me. His eyes boring into mine through the mirror as he stood straight whilst his chest raised and fell as if he was out of breath from the previous exercise.

In panic, i forced myself to look away. But even when i wasn't looking at him, i felt his eyes on me. It made the weights i held feel even heavier, i could practically feel my heart beating at my chest.

I was so thankful when Lucy finally dropped her weights, but then just when i was feeling relieved that we were walking further away from Axel it came crumbling down.

"You're doing great, I'm going to refill my bottle, wait for me at the pull up bars." Lucy said, leaving before i could even say anything.

I picked up our bags, my legs and arms slightly shaking as i grew more and more nervous whilst walking to the pull up bars were Axel was.

I kept my back turned to him when i got there, dropping the bags by the bench.

I wasn't sure why i was so nervous, i'm never usually this nervous around Axel. Maybe it was because he caught me looking at him, or maybe it was because he was super intimidating but i didn't dare look at him.

I sort of felt bad for not greeting him and pretending he wasn't there, but i didn't have the courage to turn around.

I searched for Lucy with my eyes through the glass wall. But when i found her, i fought the urge to groan when i saw her speaking to the receptionist her full bottle placed on the table.

I was beginning to feel awkward now, so i walked to one of the bars and looked up at it. I don't even have any idea what to do.

Well, i do know what to do, i'm just not sure if i have the strength for it.

Just when i was about to reach for the bar, a firm pair of hands grabbed my hips. I recognised the scent of the person, and my heart beat picked up as soon as i realised who it was.

I felt Axels warm breathe hit my neck as he adjusted his hands on my hips and pulled me closer into him so my back was now touching his chest.

"Hey, Bella" He whispered into my ear, his voice sending a million shivers all over my body and releasing butterflies in my stomach.

"Hi." I chocked out into a whisper, as i stared straight ahead watching as Lucy interacted with the girl. I wasn't expecting him to talk to me, i was nervous he would. But in some way his touch made me less nervous.

"Do you need help?" He whispered again into my ear and his hands moved up to my waist. Goosebumps formed all over my body, and i shivered when his hands touched my bare skin.

"No."

"So why aren't you doing anything, Bella?" He asked after a beat. I frowned at the fact i was caught in a lie.

"Because i don't know what i'm supposed to do." I told the truth, my voice just over a whisper. And i resisted the urge to lean into him.

"So you do need help then?" He blankly said into my ear, his warm body oddly comfortable behind me as the hairs on my body stuck up.

"Maybe." I admitted, he spun me round so my chest was now against his and placed his hands back onto my waist.

I finally looked into his blue eyes before looking at his expression. Axel was smirking, his head slightly leaning to the side as his eyes looked all over my face.

"Can i teach you?"

"Yes" the words left my mouth before i could think, and i caught myself off guard. He nodded whilst his tongue pocked at the inside of his cheek.

My body instantly felt cold when he let go of my waist and moved away from me.

He walked to the front of the bar, and i turned back around facing him again. I reached with my arms for the bar and gripped on.

For the first few tries, he held my hips as talked me through it and he helped me pull up and drop back down.

"Just like that" He said, his eyes meeting mine again. I smiled a little before dropping to the floor.

"Now try by yourself ." He said licking his lips, i inhaled a sharp breath and reached for the bar once again.

Putting all my strength into it, i pulled myself up, my hands felt slippy and my arms wobbled when i dropped and pulled myself up again. When i tried for the third time, my arms gave out, and i dropped to the floor.

"Good girl."

I blushed, placing my hands behind my back and intertwining them.

"Keep doing that and you'll get better." He mummers, walking over to his belongings and picking up his phone that kept buzzing.

He looked down at his phone before looking back up at me. "I need to go," He said picking up the rest of his belongings.

"Bye Bella." He trailed his eyes up and down my body before smirking again.

"Bye Sweetheart." I picked up the courage to call him by his nickname again. And just like i thought, his lips lifted into a grin and his dimples peeked through a little. Causing me to smile aswell.

He searched my face, before sending me one simple nod and trotting away.

Lucy was walking back in as Axel was walking out. They both budged past each-other through the door and i watched Lucy's lips mutter a 'Sorry'

"I'm sorry, i got carried away speaking with Rebecca." Her face held an apologetic smile when she walked over.

"It's okay." I replied.

"Okay let me teach you this then!" she continued, sighed and clapped her hands together.

I simply nodded, pretending the ridiculous sweetheart didn't just teach me.

~~~
Sorry i haven't been uploading much, i promise to try post more regularly.

Anywayyy i hope you loved this chapter as much as i loved writing it.

Thanks for reading lovelies <333


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