Chapter 7

Blindly she walks up to her room and closes the door. Holding on to the post of the bed she stagers over to the window, her hand on her lips which almost brushed his, she watches him out in the gazebo still standing in the same place where she left him. Grabbing her journal she clumsily sits on the sill and begins to write on the tear stained pages.

D,

So close, I was so close to letting go, letting him in, it would have been so easy. The look in his eyes was so pure he was so sweet; I didn't want to hurt him, or lead him on. I cannot risk leaving a piece of myself here, I cannot. It would be so easy to love him, it would be so easy to fall for him and fall hard. But I know the ground would not be so kind to my foolish affections, that is why I need to keep him at arm's length.

God look at him, my heart goes out to him, he is so strong and proud but emotionally a confused boy. How do I look into those eyes and say no, when every inch of me screams YES!!

I must never permit myself to be in such a compromising position with him, next time I don't think I will have such restraint.

I have to pour all of my energy into my endeavor with Mr. Scott. This must be my only focus, well that and the children. I must tread carefully on this hollow ground.

Goodbye!

With a heavy heart and tears that have yet to cease she throws herself upon her bed. Crying herself to sleep she eventually drifts off into a dreamless slumber.

In the morning she is waken by Olivia "Nina, Miss are you all right? You should have called on me to assist you in undressing, your dress is rumpled and look at your hair. If you do not mind me saying miss you look like something the cat dragged in."

"Truth be told I feel worse than I look. The lights are so bright close the curtains, please." She says squinting her eyes and burying her head in the sheets.

Attempting to get up she is tossed back on the bed, as the room is spinning uncontrollably.

"Ughhh... I have the most wicked head ache."

Olivia replies in a scalding tone "Well that should teach you, just because the champagne is plentiful does not mean you must drink your weight in it. And sherry with the Count for a night cap" shaking her head and tisking in a disapproving manner, "you are glutton for punishment." she laughs.

"At the time it seemed like a good idea, I was feeling warm and fuzzy from the alcohol the moonlight illuminated the gardens just so and... "

"And the Count was his usual charming self..." Olivia interjects with an all knowing laugh.

Sheepishly she continues "Well that too, how is a woman to say no to him. Why is he not married, I can't imagine a woman who would say no to him?" she says perplexed."You cannot imagine how hard it was for me to walk away from him."

"Well he is looking for something... more. He thought he found it in her Grace, but fate had other plans. And now it appears that he has set his sights on you, you lucky tart! All of London is a buzz with the news that the Count is smitten with a highly opinionated American. I expect for him to have some competition as suitors come to call and make his courting more difficult."

"No Livy" she shakes her head "there will be no courting. You know that I did not agree to participate in the seasons festivities for the purpose of acquiring a husband. If it was up to me I would spend my days with the children and doing research."

"Well Miss perhaps fate will interject there as well."

"If I have anything to do with it, it won't" she says adamantly as she attempts to get out of bed yet again.

Impatiently she beckons her "Now help me here! Please bring me some water and fruit I need to rehydrate and get some electrolytes back if I am going to be at all functional today."

"Pardon Miss?"

"Do we have any apples, strawberries, pears, grapes? Any fruit will do my dear and a pitcher of water please."

"I will ring for it, are you sure you do not want anything with more substance?"

"Oh I don't think that my stomach can take anything more, perhaps later."

Helping her out of bed Olivia assists her in undressing and detangling the mess on top of her head. Nina luxuriates in a luke warm bath and takes another nap. While she is asleep Olivia cleans up and readies her dress for the day. Dried and dressed Nina mashes up the food that is brought up and eats it slowly so as not to aggravate her already testy stomach. Sitting out on the balcony she absorbs some good old vitamin E, just as she is about to slip into yet another bout of slumber the door creeks open and Vanessa walks in.

"Nina are you here? Where are you child?"

"Out here" she says dreading the conversation that is surely to come.

Joining her out on the balcony, Vanessa is all smiles.

"Judging by the amount of time it has taken you to get up I gather it was a rather adventurous night." she says inquisitively but still somehow sounding assured.

"Yes well, by the smile on your face I gather that you probably know more about it than I remember."

Sitting herself in the chair next to Nina she excitedly exclaims "Oh you sent the tongues wagging, whatever did you do, better yet what did you say?"

Nina recounts the evening for her word for word, Vanessa never interrupts that is until Nina conveniently ends her story at their arrival at the mansion.

"And then?"

"No and then."

Clearing he throat "Ahem..." she stares at Nina "and then!"

"Oh you probably know it all already don't make me re-live it. I feel horrible as is" she pleads dramatically throwing her head back covering her eyes with the back of her hand.

"And then!" Vanessa say's insistently.

Tossing her hands up in the air Nina stands up and moves the conversation into the room, sitting herself in a lounger she continues, telling Vanessa everything.

"Oh you wicked, wicked girl. Well I hope for your sake that you plan on pursuing this relationship, because leaving him like that you only challenged him. If I know Nicki and I do, that little speech you made will not deter him from his ultimate goal."

"Don't tell me that!!" she howls as she abruptly stands and begins to pace bout the room. "How, what, what am I suppose to do now. I really do not wish to hurt him; you know that I am only looking to go home. I do not wish to fall for someone and jeopardize all this hard work. I have even commissioned Mr. Scott to assist me."

"Yes well you should have thought of that before you decided to take him up on his offer." she says shaking her head.

"I know he can be charming, I fell for that smile and for that smoldering look in his eye, but you need to set boundaries with that one. If you give him a finger he will take the whole hand."

"Can't you just say something to him to dissuade him from entertaining this ludicrous idea further?"

"I can try but I can tell you right now it will be to no avail, he will not stop until he gets what he wants and apparently he wants you!"

"Aghhhh..." Nina howl's in exasperation throwing herself on the chase, smothering herself in the pillows.

"Ok so what am I to do, how should I handle this?"

"I am not entirely sure, thought I would suggest you limit the amount of time you spend in his presence."

"Well I will be putting allot more time into my research with Mr. Scott. The remainder of my time will be spent with the children, I have not forgotten about them."

"Very well, now go and get yourself dressed and ready, Josephine cannot wait to see you. We are working in the garden, would you like to join us? I do think the fresh air would do you some good."

Wearily Nina gets up and walks over to her dressing room. "Where is he today?"

"He will be gone for the rest of the day giving you ample time to figure out how you would like to proceed."

Looking at her more closely Vanessa is skeptical " Are you sure you do not wish nature to take its course in this matter?"

"No..." shaking her head "I do not know... a part of me wants this; it would be like a summer romance. But I am not the type of person who can pursue this and not get attached. I could never take him with me and I don't know how I would feel about leaving my family and my life in the future."

Her emotions are as plain as day as the turmoil inside has slipped its surly bonds and begun fighting the battle upon her face.

"My more practical side is telling me not to get involved. I am scared that if I even allow myself to think about it, I will most likely give up entirely on the idea of home and stay. And that is something that right now I cannot allow to happen."

With her eyes pleading she turns back to Vanessa

"I know you wish that I would stay and by me falling in love, you would be guaranteed to have me, but what happens if it doesn't work out and because I stayed I missed my one chance to go home. What then, what will come of me then? No, I will stay on the straight and narrow and I am counting on you to reprimand me if I overstep my bounds; and if he asks tell him that I am affianced or have someone waiting for me at home. Please..."

Walking over to her Nina takes Vanessa by the hands and makes her swear to help.

"Very well if that is what you wish I will do what you ask of me. I will leave you now join us when you can, I will make sure that Josephine does not disturb you."

With a kiss on Nina's cheek Vanessa leaves and closes the door.

Emotionally spent Nina drags herself over to the dressing room and has Olivia help her dress. Still hung over she numbly walks to the kitchen to make herself a very strong cup of caffeinated tea to help her wake up.

As she is about to enter she hears the kitchens a buzz.

"Did you hear"... "I knew it, she couldn't wait to get her hands on him"... "Heard he was devastated, his footman said he was worse for wear"... "Seems she is keeping her options open perhaps she will seduce the Earl and have em compete"... "Harlot!"

Having heard enough she slams open the door and marches into the room her head held high.

"Good morning everyone. Today will be a full day for you; I have given the Chef some rather interesting recipes for dinner. I hope your fingers will be as nimble as your tongues in assisting him it will be quite a feast today. I will be coming down to check on the proceedings every so often, I hope you will not disappoint."

Walking over to the tea kettle she pours herself a steeping cup. "What I would give for a nice hot cup of Turkish coffee, I guess this will have to do." She whispers to herself through clenched teeth.

"If anyone is in need of me I will be in the gardens with her Grace and the children." With that she walks out the back door.

Outside she is still fuming 'but that is to be expected' she says to herself in attempts to put the matter behind her.

"It doesn't matter what they think as long as those that matter the most know the truth." "I won't be here much longer in any case." She continues out loud.

With that she seems to have a more positive outlook as she steps out of the shadow into the gardens. She already hears the children's laughter which pushes the remaining ill thoughts to the distant corners of her mind.

"Well aren't the three of you busy bees today" she exclaims.

Josephine rushes to her and practically knocks her down "Mind her dress Josephine; we do not want it dirty before she has had a chance to enjoy it." Vanessa adds with a wink.

Settling herself beside Vanessa they preen the roses whilst the children help weed the beds.

"They enjoy getting their hands dirty." Nina whispers watching the children muck about.

"Oh that they do. I think it is important for them to learn to appreciate the fineries in life by having them perform some of the daily work the staff does."

"Really, that is rather refreshing is that a common practice among the privileged?"

"Heavens no" she shakes her head profusely "I do not think that some of them wipe their own behinds!' she adds with a giggle.

"I refuse to raise my children in such a manner. They are responsible for certain chores, especially when it comes to their rooms. They make their beds or in Josephine's case assist; they put away their toys and help tidy up. If there is a gathering I have the maid staff do it for vanity sake, otherwise it is their responsibility. We also give them an allowance that is why we were out yesterday. They had both accumulated enough to go and spend it on anything that they wish."

"I have to say that I am impressed at your forward thinking it explains why they are such well rounded children."

"Yes and with the education you are providing them, I expect them to be even better. Josephine looks up to you so and I have seen a change in Tristan's thinking. He is much more serious and taking interest in things he never had before. Did you know that the other day he asked Nathaniel if he could take him with him to a Medical Symposium? My son not just a Duke but a doctor to boot, a mother could not be prouder."

"They are both exceptional and I see great things before them, not just titles and privileged frivolousness."

"So I hear that we will taste some interesting cuisine tonight."

"Yes, Gaston and I have been working on some interesting combinations. It is not as simple to cook certain dishes that I am accustomed to, due to the fact that the necessary ingredients are either not in season or are not available in mass quantities on this continent. Therefore, we had to substitute but I do think that we will have a successful meal."

"Nicki will be back just in time, wait till he learns you can cook too!" as the words escape her lips she sprints into a run.

As the full implication of the words hit Nina she runs after her "Oh you!!! That is not funny!!!"

After a few minutes of chasing both women collapse in the high grass laughing, hearing the commotion the children joined in the chase and have now joined the playful raucous.

"Tell us a story." asks Josephine

"Well I never told you the ending of the Little mermaid, how about that?"

They all nod in unison and she continues the story where they left off. As usual she includes the children in the retelling and sings the songs. The acoustics in the meadow are perfect, and her voice carries all over the estate.

Brining his horse over to the stables Nicki hears giggling off in the distance,

attributing it to the play of the children he pays no attention to it. Turning back to the house he hears singing as it is carried across the meadow. For a split moment his heart skips a beat when he realizes it is Nina.

"Stupid man letting a woman get to you like that." he scolds himself and purposefully walks into the mansion.

Entering his chamber he is striping off his clothes and disgustedly tosses them about the room as Giles picks them up after him.

"Sire you really must learn to handle this better. She told you her feelings if you are to respect them you must not let her affect you so."

"Don't Giles, I am not in the mood."

"You are definitely in a mood just not a pleasant one" he whispers under his breath. "How did your meeting go?" he asks in hopes the change in topic will bring about a change in his mood.

"Fine all the conditions were met so we signed all the necessary paperwork. I hope this venture pans out if it does it would double my fortune." under his breath he comments "perhaps then she would find me more suitable."

Hearing the venomous comment the butler interjects "I have not had much interaction with the young Miss but, I have on good authority that she is not one to care about your finances. Her maid tells me she is here only for the season and that she is planning to return to the Americas upon its close. She had no intention in participating in the season's festivities but the Duchess persuaded her. If what I have heard for the rest from the staff is true the young Miss came here with just the clothes on her back. Her Grace financed her wardrobe; she must be some friend in deed if she has such an alliance with the Duchess."

Standing before the mirror deep in thought Nicki examines his five o'clock shadow. "Really so perhaps she needs a wealthy benefactor" he says his mind already calculating his next move.

"Or is she waiting for someone with a more prestigious title. She better not be holding out for the other Wakefield, I will be dammed if I loose another woman to this family. Yes that must be it!"

"Sire, I do not think that Miss. Martin is as diabolical as you believe her to be." Scrunching his shoulders he continues "but if you are so concerned perhaps you should have a word with her Grace, before you brand the young Miss a fortune chaser just for refusing your advances. Her Ladyship has always had you best interest at heart and I believe will give you the most reliable answer."

Nicki grumbles in agreement his mood still black as her retires to his bedroom.

As the story comes to a close everyone is ready to go back indoors. The sun has hidden itself beyond the forest, the spot that they are in is in shadow and the soft wind has become a chilly one.

"Let us retire to the house it is time for us to begin preparation for the evening's festivities."

Before making her way to her room she stops in the kitchen to return her cup and to see how the dinner is coming along, perhaps Gaston is in need of her assistance.

"Mon Chere, you arr ear! Zis iz going to bee fantastique, zi recepiez arr delightful. Everysing iz under kontrol du not frett, go and get ready." he bows before her and ushers her out the door. Laughing Nina leaves and makes her way up to her quarters.

Olivia is already there pressing the newest dress the sizzling red one.

"I thought this one would be perfect don't you agree." says Livi with a devious smile.

"It is a beautiful dress, why are you smiling like that?" says Nina perplexed by Olivia's rather unusual cheeky disposition.

"There is no reason miss, I am just commenting on the beauty of the dress. Is red not the color of desire..."

Cutting her off Nina turns to her maid "And what is that suppose to mean? Was that Vanessa I saw skulking out and down the servant's stairs? Olivia did she suggest this dress."

Shaking her head Olivia reply's sarcastically "No...Miss... I picked this out all by myself. It does not matter what dress you choose all of them will look devastatingly gorgeous on you. Unless you put on some burlap, thought I doubt the Count would care or even notice."

"Oh NO not you too, am I to be the butt of all of your jokes tonight? If I am I will be having my dinner right here! "She sits herself down in the chase, her arms crossed pouting like a child.

"Now Nina, stop acting like an insolent child, we are just having a bit of fun at your expense. You may wear whatever you wish and no one will say a word about it, this is just between us." she says as she sits next to Nina and hugs her slouching figure.

With sorrow in her voice she asks "Do you think that I made an error rejecting him so? Vanessa says he will deem it a challenge."

"Who knows with the fickle hearts of men, their largest organ is their ego."

Laughing at the comment Nina brightens up and they begin getting ready. After