- 45: Yes, I'm a creep -

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*Hands over a chocolate Oreo and m&ms*


Emily's P.O.V.

I honestly don't know why Alec even bothers to hide his relationship from me anymore. God, it's getting really old.

I don't know if it's exactly a relationship though, because it just consists of a lot of staring when the other one isn't looking.

I got off my bed, trying not to wake up Ryder who stayed over and refused to leave my side.

I let my thoughts wander as I stepped into the shower.

Even though I know what's going on, for sure, I'm not sure when Alec and Lex decided to exchange cooties with each other.

I remember the first day we all met. I straight up just didn't give a fuck and disappeared into my room but I didn't miss the way their eyes connected and they just stood there looking into each other's eyes, before I walked away.

I didn't think much of it but after a while, their behaviour towards each other grew less and less subtle to the point where I almost walked in on them multiple times doing whatever that's unholy.

The excuses and lies grew childish and stupid.

I sighed before stepping out of the shower and putting on some new clothes, carefully not to worsen my broken ribs situation.

Most of my wounds could be covered with a t-shirt with elbow length sleeves and the rest of the cuts on my face could be covered with some makeup.

We still had some time before we had to hurry for school so I decided against waking Ryder up right now. It was a tough day for him yesterday.

Even though I was the one beaten up.

'Eh...'

I walked towards the bed, where Ryder was sleeping on his stomach. He wasn't shirtless, sadly, so I couldn't stare at his insanely muscular back.

I crouched right in front of his face, to stare at his beautifull face as he slept in peace.

Yes, I'm a creep.

I couldn't restrain my hand from moving the hair that was on his forehead.

Even though his facial bone structure was a lot sharper and he had a light stubble on his face, I could still see the image of his 14 year old self, with the peaceful and carefree look.

I smiled as my gaze dropped from his voluminous eyelashes to his lips and I had to use every ounce of control in me to not lean in and basically violate his personal space.

I was happily staring at him with a smile on my face when a sudden sound of door opening made me stumble and fall on my ass.

I winced as I felt the effect of the fall on every one of my injuries.

I looked up to tell the person off but froze as I saw none other than Alec standing at the door, glaring at my bed.

Or more like the person lying on my bed.

Shit.

I sighed before getting off the floor and before Alec could yell, I walked towards him, motioning for him to be quiet and pushed him out of my room and followed him outside, shutting the door lightly.

"Why Em?" I heard Alec ask in a low tone.

I turned to him, sighing. "Why what Alec?"

"Did you seriously forget what he did to you?" He asked, grabbing my shoulders.

"No." I said, exasperated. "I haven't. But... "

"But?" He frowned.

"Why does it even matter? Nothing happened, okay? I was hurt so he stayed ov-"

"That's not the point Em." He cut me off, running a hand through his hair. "I just... After all that he has put you through, I never thought, you would so easily forgive him."

I sighed. "I know... I'd be lying if I said that I haven't thought of forgiving him but another lie would be if I say that I have forgiven him, already. In fact, I'm still processing the fact that I'm here."

"I still don't think it's a good idea, Em." He said, crossing his arms over his chest. "I'll never be able to trust him, specially with you."

"Don't you think I'm old enough to make such decisions for myself, Alec?" I rolled my eyes.

"Apparently not." He scoffed.

Yup. The attitude is a hereditary problem.

"Excuse you!" I scoffed back. "You can't give me attitude in this department, dude."

"Why not, Emily?" He said, raising his eyebrows in challenge. "I was the one who was there. I saw it all. I saw the condition you were in, when I had to carry you to the hospital because you had to meet your damn best friend."

"He didn't know!" I yelled back.

"And that reason is enough?" He retorted.

"It's not a reason, it's a fact, Alec. It wasn't easy for me either, okay?" I frowned. "He feels guilty enough for something he wasn't even responsible for."

"And you trust him?"

"Yes." I said, without missing a heartbeat.

He sighed, shaking his head. "You're gonna regret that."

"Don't keep throwing words at me, that don't even make sense." I said, rage slowly taking over me.

"I make complete sense, and you know that. You trust people too easily, Emily." He said.

"Then I guess I'm wrong to be trusting you as well." I scoffed.

"What? Now who's the one spitting nonsense?" He raised a cocky eyebrow at me.

I grit my teeth in anger.

"YOU'RE HOOKING UP WITH MY BEST FRIEND!" I yelled, having lost all my self control.

His eyes widened. "WHAT?"

"Don't even pretend to be innocent, Alec. I've known this for a while and unlike you, I'm not being a baby about it." I said, crossing my arms over my chest and raised an eyebrow of my own.

"I'm not hooking up with Lexi." He said, wide-eyed.

"Well, maybe not that, but I know what's going on. The morning after the carnival? When she stepped out of your bathroom? I was the one putting reasons in your mouth, when you froze like a fucking 6 year old."

"That has nothing to do with what we're talking about." He sighed, running a hand down his face.

"Of course, it does. I know whom to trust, Alec. I'm not sure what it is, that you two have but isn't it enough to understand what position Ryder and I are in?" I asked.

"No it doesn't, it's not even close to similar." He said in a frustrated tone.

"How?" I asked exasperated.

"BECAUSE I LOVE HER!"

"WELL, I LOVE HIM TOO!"

There was a moment of silence before both our eyes widened and we smacked a hand on our own mouths, at the same time, as if we couldn't believe what we just said.

We are stupid.

"We agree to never talk about this and pretend like it never happened?" He said, finally coming out of his shocked state.

My eyes landed on a figure behind him and I shook my head. "It's a little late for you."

He gulped before sighing and motioning to something behind me. "Yeah, you too."

We refused to turn around.

"This is all your fault." We muttered at the same time.

My eyes widened. "My fault? You don't know when to keep your damn mouth shut."

"I don't think I was the only one talking." He whisper-yelled. "Look what you made us do."

I ran a hand through my hair. "Well, at least I said it back."

He sighed. "God, this is messed up."

"Alec?" A small voice said, making Alec tense up and turn around to face Lex.

I stared at them in anticipation, firstly because I wanted to and secondly, because I didn't want to face Ryder yet.

I saw Lex move closer to Alec with a dazed expression on her face.

I couldn't help but feel giddy and grossed out at the same time. Giddy because I've never seen them like this up close and grossed out because it's still my brother and my best friend.

"Was that- did you-" Lex stuttered, blinking vigorously.

Alec moved forward to grab her shaky hands in his.

"I know. I know it's not what I'm supposed to feel and the timing is all wrong, but I really can't help the way I feel." He sighed.

Lex looked at his bowed head with so much adoration that I couldn't help but smile.

"I love you too." She whispered.

Alec's head jerked up and my smile widened.

He looked at her in shock while she just smiled up at him with moisture in her eyes.

But her smile suddenly faltered and her gaze snapped to mine.

I frowned at that. "Wha- oh!"

Alec turned to look at me as well with a sheepish look.

My eyes widened. "Please don't tell me that you guys didn't get together because of me."

Lex shot me a look of guilt.

"Are you kidding me? Do you know me at all?" I said, exasperated and slightly hurt that they would think so low of me. "You really thought I'd have a problem with this?"

Lex tipped her head to the side. "Well... You are quite aggressive."

I sighed. "Guys, I knew about you two since the last two years. I noticed the googly eyes you made at each other so I know exactly how genuine you two are. I would never want to be the reason that separates two people in love."

Lex's eyes met mine and she smiled a smile of gratitude.

Alec rubbed the back of his neck, nervously. "Well, you know-"

"Oh just kiss her already!" I rolled my eyes.

Lex turned a very dark shade of red really quick.

Alec chuckled, looking at her but leaned down to kiss her, nonetheless.

"Is it my turn yet?" I heard Ryder whisper in my ear, making me shiver as I felt his hot breath tickling my ear.

Oh shit.

I gulped. "We uh- we'll get late for school."

He let out a dark chuckle. "Does it look like I care?"

I looked up at him and I swear I almost stopped breathing. His hair was disheveled, his eyes were diluted and were a shade darker. And he stood there, shirtless.

I cleared my throat, looking away from him when I found it hard to keep my gaze restricted to his face.

I turned to glanced at Alec and Lex only to see the spot empty. I don't even want to know what they disappeared for.

"Miles..." Ryder said.

I turned to him and grabbed his hand, pulling him back into my room.

I sat on the bed while he stood in front of me. "Yes?"

"I'm sorry, but I heard it all." He sighed. "I swear I didn't want to, but I didn't want to intrude either and the walls aren't really soundproof."

I smiled up at him as he blabbered away.

Looking at him, always makes me feel like I'm so lucky to have him in my life. He treats me with nothing but respect but he's still a little kid at heart.

"Anyway, the point is, I know it's really hard for you to completely forgive me, for what I did. But I just want you to know that you mean a lot to me and I'll do anything in my power to make you completely trust me again." He continued.

That's the part he's concerned about?

"I love you."

He froze, looking down at me, with his mouth opening and closing like a fish.

"I- I heard, but I thought, you said in the heat of the-"

"I love you." I repeated, with the same smile.

"What Alec said-"

"I love you." I shook my head, dismissing any thought that he had in mind.

I will not allow him to ruin this moment for himself or me.

He scrunched his face as if he's in physical pain and couched down in front of me, cupping my face.

"I love you too, so so much." He said, relief dripping from his tone.

"Then, that's all that matters." I said, kissing the palm of his hand.

He nodded, but his smile seemed forced.

"Ryder." I sighed.

"What?"

"I can see right through your fake smile." I said, running my finger over his bottom lip. "What's bothering you?"

He rubbed the skin of my cheek, looking into my eyes. "Do you think you'll be able to forgive me, someday?"

My gaze softened and I nodded. "Eventually."

"How are you so sure?" He asked, tucking a strand of hair behind my ear.

"Because I love you."

He lips broke into a grin, before he closed his eyes. "Please don't let this be a dream." He muttered, making me chuckle.

I grabbed the back of his neck pulling him to me. We sat there in each other's arms.

"You know," I started, now straddling him. "there's someone else who deserves an apology from you."

He frowned in confusion while I simply grinned.

*****

Ryder's P.O.V.

I stood in front of Connor in our school hallway, while Miles stood awkwardly beside me.

"Hey man," Connor waved awkwardly. "you okay? Why did this chimp drag me here from my way to the cafeteria?"

He glanced at Miles but she simply turned to her locker and pretended to be busy.

"Yeah... well," I sighed. "I realise that I owe you an apology, for being a jerk for no reason."

"Ooh, I get it now. Even though you're relieved that I'm gay, you also can't live with the guilt to have accused Mill of something like that, right?" He said, putting his arm over Miles, and squishing her cheeks.

"You-" He slapped his hand on her mouth.

"Clearly need holy water, bitch." He said, rolling his eyes.

"It's not just that..." I sighed. "Apparently I've always been this ignorant jerk and the guilt just intensifies ten folds because of that."

Miles and Connor frowned.

"I- I have been jealous of you for a while now, it's not recent at all." I took a deep breath. "That night, when you picked up my call on Miles' phone, I lost it. And the rest is, well, history."

I shut my eyes as painful memories resurfaced.

To my utter surprise, I heard the sound of Connor chuckling.

"So I caused it all huh?" He chuckled.

I shook my head. "That's not-"

"Chill dude. It's fine, I admit that maybe I stepped the boundaries when I answered her phone considering the fact that I always knew that you guys were mad in love with each other." Connor said, pulling at Miles' cheek, making her whine.

"You- you- what?" I asked, flabbergasted.

"Oh please, everyone knew that you guys were literally in love, I just wasn't sure if it would last." He said, looking at the both of me. "Well, it did. And it surprisingly grew."

I looked down at Miles and my heart ached as her blue eyes pulled me into a trance.

"Ugh couples." Connor said, pushing Miles off of himself.

He walked towards me.

"It's all good, man. Just be good to her." He said patting my shoulder, while I nodded.

He walked towards the cafe. "I'll save you two a seat." He said, over his shoulder.

I smiles as I saw him walk away but that didn't last as I felt a jolt of pain in my shin.

I bent over and looked up to see Miles glaring at me.

"Wha-"

"Jealous?" She whisper-yelled. "You ignored my bleeding shoulder because you were fucking jealous?"

She raised an unamused eyebrow at me as I blinked up at her.

"Miles-"

"Oh no no, you don't get to Miles me right now, mister." She said, before turning and walking towards the cafeteria.

I winced as I felt a bruise form on my shin.

I expected this reaction, but from Connor and not Miles. I guess I miscalculated.


*Author's note*

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Until next time <3



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