Chapter: A Discussion

Author: Axel Otto

It was Saturday morning. I was lying in Ryan's king bed as he lounged beside me. I didn't want to go home. I didn't want to see Tucker. I didn't want to do anything except watch The Real Housewives of New Jersey with Ryan.

But, like usual, I didn't get want I wanted.

My phone rang. The caller ID said Mrs. Oaks was calling. Now extremely worried, admittedly about Tucker, I quickly answered the phone, now sitting upright in Ryan's bed.

"Ms. O? What's up? Is Tuck okay?"

"What? You aren't with him? I was hoping you were. He's not answering my calls."

I got up off the bed and shoved my feet in my sneakers. "No, I'm on my way home. I'll have him call you when I get there."

She breathed out a sigh of relief. "Thanks babe. The Oaks send their love. Oh, and, happy birthday, hun!"

I smiled. "Thanks, Ms. O. I'll talk to you later."

I hung up, and thanked Ryan for harboring me for the past day. Then, I headed home.

As soon as I entered the apartment, Tuck was jumping off the couch. "You should have called me, I would have sent a cab to get you," his voice was gentle, and he was obviously watching what he said.

I shrugged. "It's not that long of a walk." I looked down, seeing his phone in his hand. "Why aren't you answering your mom? Call her, she's worried."

He sighed, offering no explanation, then did as I said. As it rang, he looked at me helplessly. "Ma?"

I couldn't hear Ms. Oak's, but I knew what she would be saying.

"Yeah, I know... I'm sorry... Yeah, what makes you say that? We're fine, ma... No, I haven't yet... I don't know, soon, I guess!...Okay.... Okay.... Yes.... I know... Love you too... Bye."

He hung up, and threw his phone on the couch and began rubbing his temples.

We were both silent, standing opposite of each other. I didn't know what to say.

"She means well, you know," I said, a stupid attempt at trying to talk to him. He gave me a halfhearted smile, then collapsed on the couch.

"I know."

I sat in the chair behind me. It was weird being this far away from him.

"We need to talk, Tucker."

He nodded, sitting up a little. "I know."

"We're hurting my sister." It wasn't exactly what I wanted to say, but he nodded.

"We are."

"If you're going to marry her, we need to stop."

He looked up at me finally. His brows were drawn in. "Am I?"

I sighed. "Do you want to?"

Tucker gave me a look. "Don't you dare, Axel. This isn't my decision. This is your decision."

I stood up, his words infuriating me. "Do you even hear yourself? You're talking about marriage! You're giving me the power to make the biggest commitment of your life! If that isn't a decision on it's own, I don't know what is."

Tuck stood up. "Now what the hell does that mean?"

Tuck was never good about common sense. "What do you think it means? If you don't care either way, if you're fine not marrying my sister, then why the hell do you have a ring!"

"BECAUSE I THOUGHT THAT'S WHAT YOU WANTED!"

"ME? YOU THOUGHT I WANTED TO GIVE YOU UP? YOU THOUGHT I WANTED TO LOSE YOU? YOU THOUGHT I WANTED TO WATCH MY SISTER GET EVERYTHING THAT I WANT?"

Tucker froze. My mind reeled, processing everything I just said to him. My hand flew over my mouth. I didn't know what to do. Tucker was staring at me like I had six heads. I wanted to cry.

"Oh, Axel..."

Tuck's face had softened. He had tilted his head slightly, like he does when he sees someone cry. He pitied me. He fucking pitied me.

My head grew woozy. Images swarmed my brain. Images of Tuck touching me, whispering things to me, telling me he loves me. Except now, all of those words were replaced by two new ones. "Oh, Axel," and the sound of my heart breaking into seven thousand small pieces.

Ironic, isn't it? The only thing my heart was really composed of, was him.

My phone rang. I silently thanked whoever was calling. It turned out to be my mom.

"Alles gute zum geburtstag!" It was my mom calling to wish me a happy birthday.

"Danke, mutti."

"I hope you have something fun planned! Oh, and put Tucker on! He was asking about this necklace Maggie liked. I think he's getting her it for her birthday."

"Mom, now isn't a good time. He'll talk to you later." For some reason, the mention of my sister made me furious, not upset. I hung up, and tossed my phone on the couch. I looked up at Tuck. He was staring at me strangely.

"What did Rachel want?"

"I don't know, she wants to talk to you about some necklace or something, I don't know why she didn't just call you."

"Well then what was all the German about?"

I looked up at him, and shook my head. "It's my birthday, Tuck."

He swore, and grabbed at the back of his neck. "Jesus, Ax, I totally forgot."

I snorted. "Yup. Happy fucking birthday to me."
I stormed passed him, almost knocking him over heading for my room. Except when my hand landed on the handle, I turned back to him. He was already looking at me, biting his lip.

"You know what you should give Maggie for her birthday?" I didn't wait for him to respond. "That stupid ass fucking ring. I'm done with this, Tuck. I'm done."