Dedicated to Chanduz, ( hope you can read the update before your exam starts, all the best)

and to all my readers, friends and followers...

Chapter 31 : Hearts That Beats Together

" It Takes a strong heart to love,

But it takes an even stronger heart to continue to love,

after it's been hurt."

~ Anonymous...

The day of Fashion Show...

Delhi ..

XYZ plaza....

Looking at Khushi's state, Arnav gets alert and immediately scoop Khushi's fragile self in his arms. He carry her in bridal style while Khushi whispered, " Where are you taking me?"

"Home..." came his curt reply. She did not say anything but looked at him with her teary eyes.

Khushi was looking at him forgetting all of her surroundings. As if only she and the man who has cocooned her now, is present in the universe, rest has been faded away..

He is taking her to HOME...

Though Arnav could sense Khushi's moist eyes on him constantly but he was looking forward. Taking long strides he walks hurriedly towards the car parking, he has to take away Khushi from this toxic environment, as early as possible and soon Arnav placed Khushi in the car and drove away in the enlighten road of Delhi Highway.

Aman Mathur was the one who observed the whole exchange between the estrange couple. He was worried sick for both Arnav and Khushi. But the way Arnav composed himself and gather Khushi's shattered self, he did not wanted to intrude.

Aman bring out his phone to inform Shyam about the latest development while wiping away the lone tear, " Hopefully this time you two will find solace.. God Bless..."

******************

The Night of Fashion Show...

Delhi Highway ..

Arnav was driving the car looking straight at the road. The moment he placed Khushi in the passenger seat, buckled her seat belt and started the car, Khushi's trance was broken.

" Where... Where are you taking me? Stop the car." Khushi tried to sound rude but it came as whisper.

" I told you...HOME..." Arnav said firmly but his voice was soft.

" I don't have a home. I am an orphan." Khushi's soft whisper broke Arnav's already shattered soul a little more.

" But you resides in me..." and the moment those words escapes from Arnav's mouth Khushi snapped her head towards him and once again the brown pool meet with hazel orbs..

Time stop...

So, the chaos of the surrounding...

Only the increased heartbeats of both of them and their laboured breath were filling up the pin drop silence of the closed car area.

And suddenly it started raining heavily. Softly splashing water droplets hit the car windows and the skies are overhung with the blanket of grey, so much that it was difficult to differentiate between the sky and the clouds.

Rain...and the drop of Petrichor....

It brings back thousands of bitter sweet memories.

Slowly breaking the eye lock Arnav parks the car at a side. The area was a secluded area, away from the busy Delhi night. Besides the heavy rain, it seems that Arnav and Khushi are away from reality, totally disconnected from the outer world.

Khushi was looking at the racing rainfall which was splashing on the window...She don't know what to say anymore, she wants to run away from everyone yet she wants to confide in this moment.

Stupid heart...

Arnav on the other hand was looking at Khushi..Thousand of emotions were clouding his thoughts but his mind was Stuck only on one specific revelations. That is ...

Khushi's condition...

Arnav was shocked and numb initially when Khushi announce his and Sheetal's name together. Infact the moment Sheetal touched him with those nasty hands of her, Arnav felt puking, his inside churn with immense pain and he felt dirty.

But the moment his eyes met with Khushi's eyes on the stage, he was shook with watching the intensity of pain and vulnerability of those eyes. That was the moment when Arnav truly realised the gravity of his act years before.

He not only humiliated Khushi but had broken her spirit, her self confidence, her trust. He made her aimless and forced her to question her own self. And that was the very moment when Arnav Singh Raizada realised that Khushi is still stuck in the same situation where years before he had abandoned her.

It's true, he had suffered in last 6 years without Khushi.. It's true he tried to commit suicide unable to cope with the burden of guilt and unable to face the truth, but he had his family with him, well not directly but indirectly they were with him. He got the opportunity to go through a counselling session. He had build up a successful career..in those 6 years, he had made a life of his.. Frankly, he had achieved something ..

But what about her? Khushi had hided herself away from everyone.

Indeed he was craving for Khushi, her forgiveness, her love, her concern...as a whole he wanted her back in his life... But in this way, was not he always thought about his pain, his agony, his loss, his loneliness??

His...his... and only his...

He wanted Khushi to heal HIMSELF...

Not for a moment he thought did Khushi healed or not..

Even after meeting her all those years after, for last few weeks he wanted a chance for himself, to repent but not for a single moment he thought WHAT KHUSHI WANT...

He never tried to unveil the rude facade of Khushi...but today..

Today at the stage, when Khushi spoke those words of venom, Arnav realised long gone the selfless girl instead, a female version of his own self is standing in front of her.

Lack of self confidence... lack of trust on ownself... vulnerable... shattered...

And no one, but he himself is responsible for her this negative transformation...

The incident occurred 6 years before, had traumatized both of them.

Both of them undergone a whirlpool of emotions and breakdown but Arnav was lucky enough to have people of support him, he was helped medically too..

But Khushi ??

The thought itself numb his whole being, Arnav felt to pull out his hair and scream in despair... He was so ignorant, so self occupied that he failed to access that nowadays Khushi's smile never reaches her eyes...

Truth is that Khushi is still stuck in the same situation and her whole being is moving around the abyss of pain, betrayal and abandonment...

But no more...

With a deep, long breath Arnav slowly looked at the truth , looked at the result of his sins... he looked at the lifeless, devastated, shattered woman.... he looked at Khushi....

" Khushi...." the word came out of his mouth like a slow whisper...

Khushi did not reply, she was looking at the outside of the window, towards the rain...

" Are you hurt? Did you felt humiliated? Did you felt that how it felt like when the person you love most, stab you back? Did you able to hear the shattered sound of your heart ? Did you Arnav? " Khushi asked still looking outside while her voice was thick with crying.

" Yes.. I felt. I felt the hurt and humiliation, realise the feeling of betrayal and gone through the emptiness. I heard the sound of shattered heart...But It was not only mine but I felt all the emotions of yours... I heard the sound of your shattered heart and trust.. and believe me, It's so ..so unnerving..." Arnav chocked a little while controlling himself.. He cannot cry today, he has to gather Khushi...He cannot fall weak..

" I wanted to hurt you the same way you hurt me. I wanted to make you feel empty. I wanted to abandoned you.." Khushi said while furiously trying to wipe her tears.

" I know.." Arnav whispered feeling so helpless not able to prevent Khushi from breaking down again.

"But why hurting you feel so worse? Why after hurting you I felt the abandonment once again? Why I am feeling so lost? Why it felt like my ownself was BETRAYED again?" Khushi finally looked at Arnav with her teary, red puffy eyes. Tear was rolling now from her eyes like a cascade.

Arnav's eyes were not dry, but looking at Khushi he cursed himself thousand times for being so insensitive and immature years back. "But I have to be strong," He reminded himself.

Slowly Arnav locked his eyes with Khushi and said, " Because Your feelings for me is so pure and deep rooted that, after my every wrong deeds still you were connected with me. Your soul was connected with me. You never abandoned me , Khushi... It was me, who was the sinner, who destroyed every beautiful feelings which we had, but for your genuine , true love, It survive, WE SURVIVE...."

Khushi looked at him in daze, everything seems like a dream. She did not want to confide within him, yet why she is feeling so contented?

" Don't think your sugar coating words will melt me. I... I... hate ..hate you." Khushi whispered choking.

Arnav took sharp intake of breath.. Patience...Patience Arnav...

" I know.. I deserve this. I am the cause for your every misery." Arnav said trying hard to hide his own tears. Getting Khushi's pity is the last thing he wants.

" But still why seeing your pain my hearts cry every time? I wanted to make you helpless but why seeing the helplessness in your eyes broke me piece by piece?" Khushi sniffle feeling too exhausted by now.

" Because your heart beats with mine. My stupidity did not able to erase your strong feelings.." Arnav said with a sad smile on his face.

Rain was constantly pouring , they both were caged in the car, close...but nothing matter anymore. The two bleeding hearts were searching and seeking solace from each other... the surroundings and rational thoughts does not matter more. This is a moment probably their hearts were yearning for years now...

" I am warning you..your sweet words will not melt me anymore. Infact I don't want to get trapped once again with your fake words. I hate you..." Khushi tried to produce few hurtful words but it feels that the man in front of her is not going to break in any way. And his next reply just proved that.

" I never able to trap you Khushi, not by my flirting, not by my sugar coated words, not by my jealousy or not by my venomous words... But it was you who had CAGED me with your purity and innocence, since forever.." Arnav smiled this time while with a trembling hand he just tucked a hair tendril of Khushi behind her ear, ever so tenderly..

" Why did you not trust me Arnav? Why did you not asked me once on that day ?" Khushi whispered.

" It's not about trusting you. I could not able to trust myself. I always knew you deserve far, far better person than me in your life. I was scared, I was jealous. I was not strong enough to accept rejection from you. I just act on my impulse..." Arnav stop unable to say that he was intoxicated state while he was hurling accusations on that day.. .. He does not want any pity but it's better Khushi lash out her all agony.. He will accept it in open arm.

" You were jealous?" Khushi tried to confirm that she did not hear wrong. Arnav was jealous? Did not jealousy come with affection and Love? " No... don't go there Khushi...don't" Khushi chanted internally.

Arnav looked at the emotional changes passes on her face, how much she try but her face and eyes are the mirror of her soul. He can easily feel what kind of emotional turmoil she is going through.

" Will you believe me, if I say, I was, I am and I will be always jealous about the closeness of any man near you." The hint of possessiveness shook Khushi.

"It must be a dream.. Did not Arnav said years ago that all were fake.. He had faked his emotions?" Khushi thought to herself, and as if reading her inner turmoil, Arnav replied... " it's true, not your imagination. And on that day years ago, whatever I said were all lie..the result of my impulsiveness, anger, jealousy, immaturity.."

Suddenly Khushi looked at Arnav's hand and Sheetal Kapoor holding his hand flashed in her mind. Sheetal was the person who had molested Arnav.. "Well done Khushi, you have literally forced a victim to reconcile with his molester." Remembering this Khushi felt fresh tears gather in her eyes again.

"You did not have anything to do with that Khushi.. infact you saved me." Khushi jolted from her inner thought feeling Arnav trembling hands on her. Looking at those painful eyes Khushi felt a rod iron had shoved in her heart, twisting her gut to that extend that she felt suffocated.

" It's ..it's hurting right? The tou..ch..touch of that woman? I am.. I am... so very ...I should not have done that. I have gone through the familiar feelings, years ago.. I know when you feel dirty yet no amount of water or sincere effects will wash off your this feelings." Khushi sobbed a little while continuously rubbing the area of Arnav's hands where Sheetal had touched him . Arnav was too engrossed looking at Khushi's sobbing and messed up state that he could not put attention on the last line which Khushi had spoke.

" Relax... you did nothing.. don't hurt yourself, please Kush." Arnav cupped Khushi's cheek in her firm hand forgetting the right and wrong. It's stabbing him brutally to see Khushi so vulnerable and blaming herself in which she had no hand.

"How could he be so considerate? When he became so mature and patience ?" Khushi thought looking in front of him.

" Where did that immature jerk gone?" Khushi asked while unknowingly her lips curve upwards.

" He died the very same day he lost his raingirl, his life..." Arnav replied not averting his eyes from Khushi for a nano second.

" You...did you ever remembered me in this last 6 years?" Khushi asked feeling her heart was beating faster once again with his close proximity.

" Every time I took a breath I remembered you, every time the rain drops touched me I remembered you, every time I saw a couple holding hands I remember you, every time I watched any movie poster of Salman Khan film I remember you, every time I spend restless night under the sky sleeping at poolside I remember you, Every time I gone for a long drive in late night I remember you... Khushi.. How can I forget the person for whom my heart is beating? How can I forget the person for whom I am still alive ? You can remember the person whom you forgot, but you.... For me you are my that hope which kept me alive all these years... You resides in me Khushi..." Arnav speaks with so much honesty that tears prick in Khushi's already moist eyes...

But can she forget everything?? That easily??

Answer is NO...

Never...

This is a moment of weakness.. her heart is tired of fighting continuously....

But from tomorrow her stand will change again and Khushi knew it better...

But for today, she wants to take a break....

" If you missed me that much, then why did not you for once searched for me that day? Why did not you come behind me? I.. I.. was waiting..." Khushi stopped abruptly sensing that what she was about to tell him.

Arnav was in another world. Khushi's question reminds him how cowardly he tried to finish himself, he choose to escape from the situation instead of fighting back and facing it.

Gulping down the overwhelming emotions, Arnav just whispered, " I was not in that position to come after you Khushi.. I ..was ..caught.. in a.." Arnav felt word less, he stops abruptly. He will not tell Khushi about his suicide stunt, not at least in this time when Khushi is so vulnerable.

" Leave it, I understand...That time, you never felt so..But I wonder why now? If...if you..think..that telling me this sweet words..I will melt and forget everything, then you are delusional. I will never for..forgive..yo..you.. It's too late..." Khushi hiccup while saying those last words.

" I know Khushi.. It's not easy to trust me again. I am not telling you to forget anything..don't...don't be so selfless on me.. But will you allow me to be your SHADOW ??" Arnav asked smiling while tears were rolling down from his eyes too.

" Shadow?" Khushi asked a little bit confused.

" Yes, Shadow...We never pay attention towards our shadow but it stick with us, no matter what they never leave us. I am just begging you to allow me that much in your life. Don't forgive me now because you love me, let me earn your forgiveness.. Let me in Khushi..just, let me be close to you..I am not asking you to going out with me, but whenever we come face to face just acknowledge me. I am not telling you to talk with me every now and then but please don't ignore my call....You go on with your life as you wish but let me be in that flow of yours...." Arnav looked at her with those chocolate pools with a little blooming hope.

" So, you want me to go on with my life as per my wish, right? Hummm...then If I love someone else , then will you arrange my marriage with him?" Khushi asked looking straight into his eyes.

Arnav was shocked, surprised, stupefied, devastated, shattered but the dark aura of possessiveness soon crossed his facial muscle too. Khushi was observing every emotional exchange on his