Y/n slowly opened her eyes, and squinted them a little, trying to get comfortable with the bright lights of the room.

She felt really dizzy, and couldn't really understand what was going on, as she realized that she was no longer in her apartment.

She turned around, and saw Jesse, asleep in a chair, beside her bed.

He was resting against the backrest, but his hand was holding hers, and y/n couldn't help but blush.

She gently squeezed it, and he almost immediately woke up, smiling widely, as he saw she was finally awake.

"Oh God! You're back!" he exclaimed, looking as if he was about to cry "You're back!"

He quickly pulled his chair closer, and took her hand in both of his, trying to keep his tears from falling.

Tears of joy, and relief.

"Ehy..." she softly smiled, her voice still husky "What happened?"

"We're in a hospital. I find you sitting under the shower, freezing cold. I think you fainted, or something" he softly said, caressing her hand.

"Oh... how much have I been asleep?"

"All night. The doctors said you're gonna be fine, but they want you to talk to a specialist... they think you tried to..."

She saw his eyes get dark, all of a sudden, as he swallowed hard.

"...Kill yourself..."

She looked down.

She could tell that he didn't want it to be true. That it hurt him, that he had had a though night, that he was worried sick...

But it was.
She couldn't deny it.

"I did" she admitted.

Their eyes met once again, and in his, she could see he had so many questions, so many thoughts running around.

A few silent tears started running down his cheeks.

"...Why?" he softly asked, trying to understand.

She took a deep breath.
"I... I'm just tired, Jesse. Of all this"

"What do you mean?"

"...I just... I can't do this anymore! I feel so empty, so alone... I don't get why I should suffer like this. I don't wanna suffer like this"

"You feel... alone?" he asked "...Is it my fault? S-should I have been there for you more? I don't-

"It's not because of you, Jesse. It's not your fault, it's mine..." she continued.

"...But why? Why dying?"
Tears started falling more often, leaving a mark on his pale skin.

"Because it would be easier! Less painful!... Why does it matter?" she asked, ashamed, looking away "Nobody cares anyway, so-

"It's not true!"

She turned back to look at him, confused and angry.

Why was it so difficult to understand for him?

"It is! How do you not get it?! No one ever gave a shit about me-

"I do!" he shouted "I always did!"

He ran a hand through his hair, and closed his eyes, taking a deep breath, trying to calm down.

"Y/n, I've always been here for you. I always supported you, and did my best to help you. I'd do everything for you, and you know that... that's why I don't understand.

...Why did you never tell me how you felt? Why didn't you say anything?... We know each other since kindergarten, y/n. Kindergarten. I can't believe I've known you for 25 years, and you still can't trust me enough to confide in me"

His voice cracked a little, as he said that last phrase.

"...I could've helped you, y/n. Or at least, I could've tried, if you had told me. And I know it's not much, but after all this time, I thought it could've been enough for you... I thought our friendship was enough for you"

He bit his lower lip, and tried to stop crying, looking up at the ceiling. He took a deep breath, and continued.

"Why am I not enough, y/n? What did I do wrong?" he softly continued "...What did I do?"

She took his hands closer to her.
"Jesse, it's not you, ok? I... ugh, I don't know! I don't know why I didn't tell you"

She felt terrible.

"I... I-I'm sorry, y/n..." he took his hands away from her, slowly getting up from his chair "...I need to be alone, for a bit"

He walked towards the door, drying the tears off his cheeks with the back of his hand.

"Jesse, I-

But it was too late.
He was gone.

She was alone, again.
__

That night, y/n didn't have much sleep.

She thought about all the things Jesse had said, and realized how stupid she had been.

Why didn't she talk to him?
She always did, they told each other everything, so... why?

She had had many chances, many opportunities, and yet she had never told him the truth.

Why did she keep it from him?
Why didn't she look for help?
Why didn't she talk to him?

As she thought that, all the memories about him came back to her.

She remembered all the times she had been at his house when they were little, of all the afternoons they had spent playing in his or her room together.

She remembered of the time he threw her a surprise party for her twentieth birthday, even if she had said she didn't want to celebrate it, that year.

She remembered of all the nights they had spent talking over the phone, or playing videogames, or watching movies...

It felt so good, and yet so painful, knowing what she had done to him.

"I do. I always did"

How couldn't she think he wouldn't care? After all those years, after all those good times they had spent together...

Suddently, she realized something she should've realized a long time ago.

"I'm so stupid" she smiled.
__

*Knock knock knock*

Jesse sighed, and stayed still.
He too hadn't slept much, that night, and couldn't stop thinking of how he had treated her.

She had almost killed herself. She was in pain, in need of help... and instead of trying to comfort her, he had yelled at her.

He had been so selfish.
He hadn't even thought of that, yesterday, he had only thought of how he was feeling, of how he was doing.

"I'm such a jerk..." he muttered, staring at the ceiling.

Suddently, the person outside the door knocked again, louder.

He sighed, getting up from the sofa, this time, and opened the door.
In front of him, Y/n.

"What are you doing here? Aren't you supposed to be in the hospital until tomorrow?"

"I signed and left. I needed to see you" she softly said "...can we talk?"

He silently nodded, and let her in, closing the door behind her.

He followed her to the sofa, and sat down beside her, as she took a deep breath and started to speak.

"...I'm sorry, for how I treated you, Jesse. You're right, I should have told you..."

"Y/n, it's not your fault, I-

"Please, let me finish" she interrupted him.

He nodded, and fell silent again, looking down at the floor.

"...I should've told you, I should've trusted you... you're my best friend, the only person that knows me even better than I do, and I really hate how I made you feel.

I lied to you, I made you think that I was fine... I even thought you didn't care, but I was wrong... and I think I know why"

He looked up at her, and stared into her eyes. "Why?" he softly asked.

"...Because I love you"

He froze, confused.
"You..."

"Yes. I think I always did, and... well, I just realized it. I don't know how I could've never noticed, but... I do, I'm more than sure"

"W-why didn't you talk to me, then?" he stuttered "Why didn't you tell me how you were feeling?"

"...I didn't want to hurt you" she giggled "...But I guess I did anyway, didn't I?"

She sighed, and tucked a lock of hair behind her ear, staring now at the floor.

"I didn't tell you not because I didn't trust you, or didn't think you would've understood... but because I thought of you of more than a friend, even if I still didn't know it... And I was scared. Scared you didn't feel the same"

"...Well, you were wrong"

"What?" she said, looking up at him again, confused "What do you-

Suddently, he smashed his lips on hers, holding her by the back of her neck.

She blushed hard, surprised, and then melted into it, closing her eyes, as her hands gently rested on his hard chest.

He tasted of mint and old memories...

They slowly pulled away, resting their foreheads against each other's.

"I... I don't understand, I..."

"I love you too, y/n" he panted, staring straight into her eyes "...I thought about it a lot too, last night, and I realized that I'd be nothing, without you. If I'm still here, it's just because of you, because you're with me... and I needed you to know that"

Some tears ran down his cheeks, as he lovingly stared into her eyes.

"I don't wanna lose you, y/n. I can't lose you"

She softly smiled, and put her hand on his cheek, caressing it.

"Don't worry, you won't... I will never leave you"

A/N :/
Hey guys! Here's the part two!
Sorry for the angst, I couldn't help it.

And also, is the ending too cheesy? I wanted to make it sweet, but I think it became almost too sweet.
Anyway, hope you liked it :)

- Franx