TW: Mentions of assault

The thumping music was making my heart pound harder inside, goosebumps forming on my skin, i felt lost and hopeless. Surrounded by nothing but strangers, sometimes falling on me or aggressively brushing past me. It was racking my brain, what do i do now?

Maybe taking three shots at once was not a good idea, did i suddenly forget I'm a terrible lightweight? The shots hit me like a bitch slap, my limbs slugging, unable to hold my head straight. I can be such a fucking idiot.

There's nothing more i want than to head home, i could just take a cab. To hell with Adam, still no fucking sign from him. Nothing.

"Hey, how's it going?" An unfamiliar voice floated by my ear, the warmth of a touch placed on my bare back, making the hair on my skin rise. God i fucking hate night clubs.

Their hand tracing the middle of my back, a man inched closer to me next to the bar counter. His brunette hair a mess and his eyes almost drooping. Ugh gross.

"No" i replied sternly, my sobriety coming back to save me. He put his arms up in surrender, effectively taking his arm away from my back. "Are you alone?" He leaned close to yell to me through the music.

The more he's in front of me, the more i keep remembering what happened back by the stage and the more pissed I'm getting, "NO, back off" pushing myself away from him, i walked away from the counter towards the dance floor. That's not the way you idiot.

The music was barraging, the beat getting louder and heavier, making my heart violently move with it. My feet were throbbing from the heels, I don't know if i wanted to scream or cry. I just wanna go home.

I felt myself stop. Or be stopped.

A tight grip around my wrist, i shot back.

It was that same guy, a smug smile on his face, refusing to unhand me. Confidently inching closer. "Where you going beautiful?"

I'm not in the fucking mood for this. Gritting my teeth i rolled my eyes. "I asked you-to back the fuck up" i seethed, his grip around my waist tighten, he didn't seem to care.

He eyed me from head to toe.

Violently ripping my arm away from his, i glared at him, prepared to turn around and walk away. But god is he fast. The devil works hard but creepy men work harder. "Stay you fucking slut"

His arms grabbed me on either side of my waist, one confidently traveling down to grab my butt. And when i say grab? He groped. Making sure i felt every damn inch of his fingers.

My eyes widened and my heart sank. I told this fucker to back off didn't I?

Finding all the strength in me, i placed my hands on his chest, pushing him away with all my might. I was seething with rage, my blood boiling. Everything that happened within the course of this night was flooding inside my head. I did not come here to get assaulted.

I lost all control of my body, I wasn't thinking anymore, it was my emotions. They were in control, i was trembling with rage and disappointment and even heartbreak all at once.

I will always be glad that Anna dragged me to those self defense classes she signed us up for, when I first moved in to my little apartment. I only managed to show up for maybe two or three weeks before Uni work got in the way, but I've clearly learned enough. Enough to make it hurt.

My hand forming into a fist, within a second to spare, i felt the bridge of his nose crash atop my knuckles, making him trip backwards.

But no, I wasn't done.

The dancing lights around me faded, my eyes burning onto the man screaming for pain as he held onto his nose. My jaws clenched.

"I told you, to back. The. Fuck. Up" i spat, slowly inching towards him. My hands placed on his shoulders to situate myself, my knee rushing upwards to strike him on his groin.

His calls for help were inaudible, people around was either too intoxicated and distracted with themselves, they all assumed he was tying his shoes or something.

He was on his knees, his hands covering his groin, blood pooling on his nose, trickling down his face. His eyes looked up at me helplessly, pleading for mercy.

I still wasn't done.

No one. And i mean no one, will talk to me or touch me that way, and get away with it.

Striding closer to the bleeding helpless man, my hand formed into a fist, I couldn't care, or feel the intense throbbing of my hand. God it hurt, but I didn't give a shit. I was shaking with rage, i felt violated and disgusted, alone and disappointed. That is a mixture for destruction. Isn't that all villains origin story. Oh my god is this mine? Am i a villain now?

My knuckles met with his jaw, I don't know who felt pain more, me or him? But i know the rings adorning my fingers did a lot more damage on his face, blood pooling on the site of the punch, he covered his face.

"ANTHEIA STOP" his familiar voice made all my emotions come crashing down, i felt myself turn into a puddle. His large arms snake around my waist, lifting me up and pulling me backwards. "I WASN'T DONE" i screamed, tears streaking down my face.

I'm so sorry Erika, i ruined your makeup, you did such a good job today, as you always do.

His hands cupped my cheek, turning me around to face him. Two large bouncers stood behind him, as if they were guarding the national treasure.

He didn't need for me to explain, his chocolate brown eyes read the situation, his gaze darting from me to the man, finally landing on my reddened knuckles.  His jaws clenched, turning to face the two towering men. "Take him downstairs" he spat, gesturing at the man desperately trying to hold in the blood gliding down his face.

The two large bouncers walked over to him, who was inaudibly yelling and cowering away. Grabbing ahold of him tightly, the two men lifted him off his feet, yanking him away from the floor.

"Nice of you to realize I'm here" I swat away his arms cradling my face, inching backwards to make some space. "Antheia I'm so sorry i-"

"I'm going home" my jaws were still clenched, turning around to walk back out the entrance, my feet were killing me. "W-wait An-"

I didn't wait for him. Tears were streaking down my face as i walked out, the fading sounds of the booming music instantly relieving me, i walked further down the street, passing the cue of what may be at least 20 or so people lined up to get inside.

Fuck. My hand hurts.

"ANTHEIA STOP" his voice bellowed, making me stop in my tracks down the emptying street. Chewing on my bottom lip to hinder any more tears from gliding down, I inhaled deeply, turning back to face him.

He rushingly walked over to me,  his hands yearningly reach out to grab mine, a guilt ridden look on his face, he looked distraught. "I'm so fucking sorry - I'll fucking kill him, no one will find his body i fucking swe-"

"Stop" i sniffled, my demeanor turn cold, i hopelessly looked up to see his gaze, desperately trying to get to me. "I called you, i called OUT for you, i was back there and i was waving and-"

"Antheia listen I lost my phone I couldn't find it I swear please, I had it, and then- when I was gonna call you-" he was stuttering, in a state of disarray, trying to find the words to best explain himself, to get through to me.

"I couldn't fucking find it- and they- they were all hounding me I couldn't fucking move"

"SO YOU LEFT ME OUT THERE TO GET FUCKING ASSAULTED? ALONE IN A NIGHTCLUB ADAM?" My voice vibrated, silencing him. "And she kicked me out, Rachel? had me discarded like fucking garbage, posing as YOUR girlfriend"

His expression washed over to a confusing one, his brows furrowing. "What the fuck? I didn't- she what?" He puzzled, his eyes studying mine.

"What happened Adam? I told you everything - everything she said and you're still back there discussing FUCKING DEALS?"

His grip on my hand was soft, making sure i don't feel the stinging from my bruised knuckles, "It's not that fucking easy Theia, a lot goes into this - it can't just be fucking done quick because we want it" his voice was getting irritated, exhaling deeply.

"And I'm sorry I'm so fucking sorry I wasn't there, there's just too much going on - I'm drowning, it's just so much to focus-"

I inched backwards, my heart sinking. It's probably 1 or 2 am, there were little to no cars on the road. Not many people, it was basically empty. The air was chilly, sending goosebumps on my skin, i was too distracted to even feel the cold breeze engulf around my bare legs. His gaze was digging into me, helplessly looking for a response, a painful glare wash over.

"No? Is it because of them or because of her?" I croaked, feeling a lump form on my chest.

He shot backwards, furrowing his brows harder, "what?"

"I don't know how fucking hard it can be Adam, i told you what she's like and there she is, still beside you. It looks to me like you want her there, you don't care at all about what shes done"

"Antheia. Stop it." His jaws clenched, "I'm doing all this for you. For us" caterwauled Adam.

I shook my head, scoffing. "Didn't seem like it all tonight. I really thought you'd stand up for me with her"

"I FUCKING DID - I AM"

"NO" our voices were growing louder on the corner of the street, my heart beating inside my chest, all parts of my body started to ache, "Don't fucking do this Antheia"

I remember my first cab ride the day I moved to the city, it was around 9pm, and the cab came to a stop at a red light. Catching me by surprise were two bellowing voices, a man and a woman yelling at each other from both sides of the sidewalk. How can they argue in public? I wondered.

But here I am, almost two years later, doing the same damn thing.

"Me?" I huffed, feeling a new sense of rage overcome me every time I remember the events of the night play inside my head like a sadistic movie theater. "I thought things changed, things were getting better but no"

His chocolate brown eyes were desperate, "No it runs in your blood doesn't it?"

Stop.

Please don't.

Don't say it.

"You're just like your father"

I felt the stabbing sensation of guilt overcome my body like a flood the minute those words escaped my lips. The painful and helpless expression across his face, dramatically shift to a cold, dark one.

He let go of my arms, taking a step back from me. Shaking his head in disbelief, watching me as if i were a stranger.

His gaze read my eyes, desperately trying to make sense of what I said, his brows furrowed.

There was an extended silence, trying to find words to respond back to me, his lips parted.

"Adam i-"

"We need some space"

It felt as i was slapped across the face, a level of pain ripping through my heart that I don't think I've felt before. His voice was unrecognizable.  His eyes unfamiliar. "I think it's best if you fucking leave. Right now" he demanded, his voice was dark and emotionless, as if i was nothing but a stranger in his way.

Furrowing my brows, "Fine"

Distancing between us, i turned around to walk away, "I'll call a car for you, don't go alone home Antheia it's dang-"

"I beat a bitch up before ill do it again, you don't have to pretend to care anymore" i shot at him. His hands in his pockets, his jaws were clenched. He's never looked at me like that before.

"Don't be fucking stupid, take the car" he ordered.

Ignoring his words, i walked down the street. I've walked through these very roads plenty times with Anna drunk out of our minds to know where it leads. And that's a 24 hour convenience store where i can find shelter till i call a cab.

Tears rolling down my face, all i wanted to do was collapse.