Chapter 3 | the buff pool

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I sigh happily, the Colorado sun warming my skin as I stretch out on the towel I'd laid over one of the pool chairs. Tanning was one of my favorite activities, despite my mother's many warnings about skin cancer and moles.

I'm already a bit freckly, and I couldn't care less about moles. Not when some of my personal beauty icons have some of the most iconic beauty marks in the world. Marilyn Monroe and Cindy Crawford come to mind.

As such, my friends River and Maddie and I had all decided to spend as much time at the buff pool this summer as possible. The buff pool is actually in the shape of a buffalo—our school mascot—and most the students who stay in Boulder for the summer make it a point to come here during the day.

Today, for example, is like most days. Frat boys talking and laughing in the shallow end of the pool. Sorority girls lounging on pool floaties and in pool chairs. Though my friends and I are all proud 'god-damn-independent's'.

The house we'd rented this year with Lukas, Maddie's brother, and Dallas, River's newly minted boyfriend, is also just up the hill from the rec center where the pool is. So, coming to the pool everyday won't be quiet the journey it would have been last year when just the three of us lived in South Boulder.

River and I met freshmen year. She'd been lost in the dining hall, unsure which of the many food stations to choose from and I'd grown bored of my roommate and her friends, who all ignored me on account of not knowing me well. So, we'd bonded right then and decided to sit together, the rest is history.

Maddie is a different story, she and I had both been played by the same frat boy second semester freshmen year. I'd been hooking up with him, completely unaware that he'd had a girlfriend, who turned out to be Maddie. It wasn't until her brother, Lukas, found out and confronted me that I realized what was going on.

Of course, when I told them I had no idea, she and I plotted to expose the idiot frat guy, Bart was his name, I think. River had joined in on the fun, and we've been inseparable ever since. I'd known Dallas from class, and as it turned out, he and Lukas were friends too, so their addition to our friend group was easy.

"I'm so in love." River sighs next to me.

"Ugh," I groan, turning my head slightly on the pool chair to look at her. "If you keep talking about love I'm going to be sick."

"Me too." Maddie chimes in from my other side. "I have a boyfriend, but you don't hear me waxing on about it."

"I will never let a man determine my life." I declare and River gives me a pitying look that I'd been afraid was coming.

"That's just because you've never had a boyfriend," she reminds me. "Being with another person, the way I am with Dallas, shows you how you can be an independent woman and have a nice man to come home to at night."

"Look," I tell her, sitting up slightly on my chair. "I am happy for you. For both of you really, I'm the most supportive friend." I look to Maddie who nods, smiling over the edge of her bedazzled sunglasses. "But that's not something that I want. Never has been and never will be."

"We'll see." River giggles, tossing her thick braids over her shoulder. "Who knows what the universe has in store for any of us."

"I control my own destiny." Maddie remarks and I nod, agreeing with her.

"Yeah, I don't believe in fate or any of that bullshit." I chime in, reaching under my pool chair for my San Pellegrino bottle. I pause, taking a sip of the bubbling water before continuing. "We create our own destinies with the choices we make, convincing yourself of anything more than that is a bit delusional."

"So, you don't think there's some higher power guiding us along?" River questions and I shake my head.

"You know I don't." I remind her.

"Well, you're a political science major after all," she teases then. "Makes sense that you wouldn't be into the 'feelings' side of the world."

"Facts and hard evidence will always win out over feelings."

"That's right," Maddie giggles. "Don't try to dissuade her River, we need her to be our future legal representation when we inevitably break the law."

"True." River agrees and we all laugh. "But hear me out, a little trip into the universe could change your mind."

I slide my sunglasses down my nose, looking at her directly. I know what she's implying, but I'm not too interested in that implication.

"I don't know." Maddie hesitates. "You're the only one of us that's tripped."

"Exactly, I would love to show you both what you're missing." She explains. "Think about it, it's summer, the only thing we have is work, no school, endless, beautiful sunny days stretching before us. We need to make the most of it."

"Maybe," I consider it. Part of me always had been curious about what taking shrooms is like. But I wouldn't want something to go wrong. "What if we have a bad trip though?"

"Don't even think on it," River continues. "I know you're curious. You too Maddie. We could get Lukas and Dallas to come with us too. Take a nice drive up the Flat Irons and hammock somewhere in nature."

I pause, considering what she's proposed. Maybe there's no time like the present and considering there's now a whole movement happening dedicated to psilocybin, there might be something to it.

"Fuck it," I say suddenly. "Let's do it."

"What?" Maddie gasps, eyes wide.

"You don't have to if you really don't want to," I reassure her. "But it could be fun."

"Yes!" River cheers. "I'm so excited."

"Where do we get good shrooms though?" Maddie asks and we're all silent again, pondering that very important question. I wasn't sure who to ask, none of our friends were really into psychedelics enough to have a regular plug. And when they had taken shrooms, it'd been a right place, right time kind-of moment.

"Dallas might know someone," River thinks out loud. "But actually, they're probably back in Portland now."

"Damn." I shake my head, sitting back again. Then a sudden thought occurs to me. "Oh wait, my brother's friend might know someone."

"Which friend?" River asks instantly. "The one that cooks or the pretty one?"

I already know she's asking about Lars, the designated future Gordan Ramsey of their group, and Wyatt of course. I'd be hard pressed to admit it, but he's not completely repulsive. Honestly, none of Ryder's friends are bad looking. Lars too, for example, is tall, muscular, and one of campuses shining hockey stars.

I'd always suspected that River had a little bit of a crush on Lars before she and Dallas got together, and I don't blame her. All my friends had always drooled over my brother and his friends. Lars, and Wyatt to be specific. But even Andrew and that one teammate of his, Dawson, are pretty. Just like a pretty boy to surround himself with even more pretty boys.

As if reading my mind, Maddie chimes in.

"All Ryder's friends are fairly easy on the eyes." She laughs and I nod, agreeing. "You know what they say, birds of a feather flock together."

"Wyatt." I say quickly. "I happen to know he was doing drugs just the other night."

"Isn't he on the basketball team?" Maddie asks and I feel my eyes widen, having forgot my agreement to keep my mouth shut.

"Uh well, you know the athletes on this campus could get away with murder," River adds then. "Especially the white ones, the administration turns a particularly blind eye to them."

We all laugh again, knowing that despite being problematic, that characterization is very true. I'd even go so far as to include Greek life in that category too. No matter how many 'violations' different frats seem to rack up, no one ever stops them from throwing another party.

"Let me text him," I reach under my chair again, pulling my phone from my bag. "I bet you he'd be able to get some or know someone who could."

Hey, random question ...

But do you know anyone who could get us shrooms?

He replies surprisingly quickly, especially considering he and my brother regularly employed the 'ghosting' tactic in a lot of their lives.

Well, hello to you too Aurora.

I roll my eyes.

"He just responded." I tell Maddie and River.

"Oh good," River says. "Make sure we get enough for Lukas and Dallas too; I just sent a message to our group chat. How does this Saturday sound?"

"Sounds good to me." I agree and Maddie nods.

"Same here," she says slowly. "That gives me a few days to make a decision. Still get enough for the five of us though."

I nod, turning back to the messaging app open on my phone.

Stfu. Yes, or no?

Probably yes, but it depends.

On what???

How would your bro feel abt me buying

his little sis drugs??

Trust me, he wouldn't care. Ask him.

Don't be such a pussy.

Damn.

Well, who is this us I'd be getting them for?

Me + a few friends.

And who is going to trip sit you all?

"Who is going to be our trip sitter?" I ask then, both Maddie and River look up from their phones then.

"Ooh," River pauses. "I didn't think of that. I could sit this one out, you all need to have the experience. And I don't trust Lukas or Dallas to be responsible, better to trip with them than give them an important task."

"No, I think it's important we have the experience with you. What's Wyatt doing?" Maddie asks and I grin, considering it as we look to River again.

"That could work I guess," she shrugs. "I wouldn't want to put him out, but we could buy him dinner or something as a 'thank you'."

"And we know him the best," Maddie adds. "He and I bonded over Surf's Up last year at Ryder's birthday party."

"He's averagely responsible too," I agree. "Doesn't say a whole lot in big groups, so could be good."

"Ask him." River says definitively and I nod, holding up my phone again.

Are you offering?

When would this happen?

This Saturday.

We'd buy you dinner after too.

Hmm that's a nice deal.

Let me text the plug & I'll lyk.

Sick, thank you!!

You're a life saver.

We then proceed to exchange about how much we should get, and then Wyatt pauses our conversation to ask his dealer. I set my phone down, taking another sip of sparkling water before turning back to Maddie and River.

"He's asking a plug," I tell them. "But I think it's a 'yes'."

"Perfect." River grins. "This'll be fun, he's always been a chill guy and then we'll have someone to drive us up the Flat Irons. And then, we could smoke, eat some good food, and watch trippy music videos for the come down."

"Whatever you say." I giggle and River shakes her head.

"Actually, it'll be whatever we feel in the moment." 

* * * 


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