Song for this chapter: if we never met

- John K (feat Kelsea Ballerini)

(Brb crying about how perfect this song is for Layla's story)

"You didn't trust me." I mumble, looking down at my hands that fidget, playing with his buttons on his shirt.

"I'm sorry." He mumbles, "I really am. I just-" he pauses and looks away from me, seemingly ashamed of himself. "I really don't want to lose you." He closes his eyes, I slowly bring my hand up to cup his face, stroking his cheek with my thumb.

"You're not going to." I assure.

"You don't understand. The thought of losing you scares the hell out of me. I got jealous, and I treated you badly. You didn't deserve that and I'm so sorry." He apologises, "I don't deserve you, you're too good for me Layla." He mumbles. My heart starts to ache. The only reason he was annoyed was because he was insecure and took it out on me. It's still wrong but I see where he's coming from. This is all so new, we're not even official. I'd feel a similar way if I saw Gray with a random girl, the only difference is I'd probably talk to him about it.

"Hey." I mumble softly in efforts to soothe him, as I run my fingers through his hair. "You're no better than me in any way, you're perfect for me and I'm sorry if I haven't done a very good job of showing you that. In all honesty, the thought of losing you scares me too. I can't go through that, Gray. So you have to communicate with me, tell me when things upset you - however small, because once I know then I can do everything in my power to fix it and make you feel better. I can't do anything if you don't tell me what's wrong." I tell him and then plant a kiss on his lips. "You don't understand how important you are to me, how much you've helped me. You've made my life so much better by just being in it. If anything, you're out of my league."

"That's bullshit, baby. You're fucking beautiful inside and out. But from now on, I'll communicate better. I'm sorry for hurting your feelings, I never want to do that." He says and kisses my forehead delicately.

"It's okay." I mumble, my eyes suddenly feeling a lot heavier than they were a minute ago.

"Are you tired?" He asks, running his fingers softly through my hair. I let out a yawn almost immediately after. "I'll take that as a yes." He mumbles, placing a kiss on my forehead as he manoeuvres our bodies down the bed so he's fully lying down with me on top of him still. I rest my head on his chest as I wrap my arms around his neck - cuddling into him. He continues to play with my hair until I'm asleep and I no longer feel anything but a comforting silence.

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I open my eyes hesitantly, not really wanting to wake up at all. Grayson isn't in the bed when I fully gain consciousness, making me frown in confusion. Where is he?

I sit up slowly, then decide to rest my head on my knees as I yawn loudly and stretch. Looking around the room, I realise he's not anywhere to be found and I find myself wondering what he's doing. I turn on my phone to see it's 10am, and immediately I start to get up, wanting as much time in the sun as possible.

After I've brushed my teeth, washed my face and relieved my bladder, I go downstairs finding Grayson over the stove, cooking breakfast with his shirt off.

"Morning." I mumble, my voice quiet. Grayson turns around with a grin in his face, before sauntering over to me. "What?" I ask, not liking the look of mischief in his face.

"Nothing." He denies, planting a kiss on my lips as he gets close to me. I wrap my arms around his neck, bringing him into a hug but I'm stopped from fully enjoying his embrace when I feel a wet substance crack on my head. When I look up, gooey egg mess trickles down onto my face and I glare harshly at Gray before moving to the sink to wash it off; trying to ignore his ugly laughter as he watches me.

On my way over I grab some of the leftover pancake mix on the side, secretly tucking the bowl and spoon where he can't see it.

"I'm sorry, baby. I just couldn't resist." He laughs from behind me, then wraps his arms around my waist to pull me back into his chest. I let out a scoff before seeing that now is as good time as any to get payback.

Grabbing the spoon in the mixture, I flick it behind me, my eyes watching it as it slams right into Grayson's face and drips down. I let out a fit of giggles, before escaping his embrace in fear of retaliation.

"Come back here." He demands.

"No, you started it. I just got payback, you can't get me again, it's against the rules." I stumble over my words a little, stressed.

"Fuck the rules." He grunts and runs towards me, picking me up and pouring flour over my head.

"Grayson!" I squeal, writhing in his arms while laughing. He nuzzles into my neck, placing a few kisses there before putting me back on the floor.

"Hmm," he licks his lips as he looks down at me, "I think we need a shower."

"I do too." I mumble, lacing my hand with his to pull him towards the bathroom, leaving the pancakes on the side in a stack.

"Wait, really?" Grayson asks shocked.

"Yes, really." I turn around in the doorway of the bathroom to plant a kiss on his lips, before quickly retreating and slamming the door in his face. Or at least attempting to. His hand stops the door from closing, as he looks at me with a devilish glint in his eye.

"It's not nice to tease." He grunts, before taking a slow step towards me into the bathroom.

"What are you gonna do about it?" I challenge, walking closer to him as well. He lets out a dark chuckle, before closing the door and locking it. His hands make their way around my waist as he backs me into the wall.

"Get out of your clothes and let's find out." He demands, his eyes raking from my head down to my toes in appreciation.

"Nah." I shrug, and attempt to move but he doesn't let me as he pins my hands to the wall as well, leaning in to whisper in my ear.

"You're sexy when you're trying to deny what we both know you want." He whispers before biting on my ear and peppering kisses down my jaw.

"And what's that?" I ask him, my breath halting as he begins to suck on the sensitive spot on my neck.

"Me." He states simply before leaning in and placing his lips on mine. His mouth descends on mine with desperation and I find myself struggling to breathe as I think about how much of a good kisser this guy is. Experience, I guess. Not that I'm complaining.

I stop for air but he quickly moulds our lips back together after giving me just a mere second to recover. I tug on his shirt, a silent request for him to take it off and he's more than happy to. I've never seen someone move faster, his tshirt is off in two seconds and he quickly moves to take mine off too, or his (that I wore last night as pyjamas), leaving me standing in just my black lace underwear. Courtesy of Lydia packing for me of course. If she hadn't, I'd have been in my pink cloud cotton panties. His eyes follow my figure, a sparkle of desire in the green tones and he doesn't waste much time before placing his lips back on mine.

I push his sweatpants down his legs and after he steps out of them, I accidentally look down to catch a glimpse of his larger than average bulge. He turns around, stripping fully before getting into the shower and turning it on.

I'm still with shock and don't move for a couple of seconds until I hear his voice over the splashing of the water.

"Come join me, love." My heart skips at the nickname, and I remove my bra and panties, before stepping in behind him. Love.

He turns around and looks at me with a swift appreciative glance before pulling me closer to him.

"You're so fucking gorgeous." He says before kissing me again.

He grabs the shampoo, squirting some in his hands before rubbing it into my locks as we make eye contact. He turns me around, pressing my back into his chest as he gives me a head massage, washing away all of the food from the food fight we had earlier.

We do nothing apart from make out, and let our hands wander a little as well as washing food off of each other.

By the time we get out and change, everyone is up and waiting at the table for us. Cute family goals.

"Hurry up." Lydia growls, "I'm fucking starving."

"You're very welcome, Lyds." Grayson taunts, flicking her on the nose for her lack of manners. She lets out a grunt and then slaps a pancake onto her plate, before soaking it in syrup. She picks the whole things up with her fork and tries to shove the whole thing in her mouth at once.

"Lovely lady." Reece comments.

"Sexist fuck." She spits through a mouth full.

"It's not sexist. It's called having manners." He says.

"Why'd you say "lady" and not "human" then?" Lydia argues. Here we go again. All these two seem to have are these playful arguments - Lydia tends to win them all because she always goes too far. I zone out, grabbing a pancake from the stack before spreading Nutella on it and cutting some strawberries.

I hear Grayson stifle laughter from behind me and I look up to see him watching me as I make sure not an inch of my pancake is left without Nutella. He quickly kisses me on the cheek before returning to eat, leaving a trace of sugar from his lips behind. Disgusting.

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We all agreed to go kayaking today, so around 5pm we make our way to the water sports shack, in order to rent some. The boys are booking while Lyds and I apply suncream and watch them.

We just hung around the pool today, my tan is coming along nicely.

"How did they get girls like us. I mean we're the full package and they're just... them." She says in a disgusted tone.

"So fuckin true." I agree, joining in, "it's not like they have abs, gorgeous faces and the prettiest eyes. Grayson is-"

"What about me?" He asks and my head snaps up to see him looking down at me with confusion.

"Nothing." I choke out quickly as Lydia laughs in the background. "Lydia was just saying she's out of Reece's league." I throw her under the bus for laughing.

"Why you piece of shit-" she screeches and leaps towards me, tackling me into the sand. I let out loud giggles as she begins to jab me in the sides, fully knowing how ticklish I am there. Grayson eventually pulls me from under her as Reece grabs Lyds.

"You've got sand in your hair." Grayson points out.

"No way. It's not like I was just pinned to the sandy floor or anything." I mutter sarcastically with a roll of my eyes.

"Damn okay. You wanna leave your attitude here and not bring it onto our kayak?" He teases as he straps a life vest around me.

"No. She's with me." Lydia says, dragging me away from Grayson and sitting herself down on the two-person kayak, leaving the boys as a threesome.

"I don't consent to that." Grayson tries to argue.

"Too bad, bitch." I smirk and get on the back with Lyds.

"Traitor." He comments with a smirk, "you'll regret this."

"Whatever." I mumble, grabbing the oar to start paddling.

"Paddle." Lydia screeches from up front.

"Oh please, this boat wouldn't be moving if I wasn't paddling."

"Are you calling me weak?" She questions.

"Yes." I reply, before she's even finishes asking the question. Immediately, she starts leaning from side to side, effectively causing us to wobble, tipping violently towards the water. I let out a series of shrieks but she carries on until we end up capsizing.

As the boys go past us, they make sure to splash us with their paddles before zooming off - not before Grayson sends me a killer smirk from the back of the kayak.

The sunset has begun already, so we're viewing it setting over the horizon.

Both Lydia and I scramble back into the boat and paddle a little further out, but we still aren't able to find the boys.

"Stupid rats." Lydia comments, "this is why we should've just done a girls vacation." She rants, screwing her face into a displeased position.

"Well I'm not paddling anymore, so we'll watch it from here." I moodily put my paddle down and cross my arms, staring out to sea at the beautiful sight in front of us. making Lydia turn her head slowly, a gentle smile on her face. She then decides to turn her body to face me completely, and I let out a squeal as she makes the boat wobble.

"She's looking down at you right now, proud as shit at the boss ass bitch you've become." She smiles, her blue eyes sparkling. I nod my head with a smile. She knew exactly where my head went as we sat peacefully on the water watching the beautiful oranges and reds painted across the sky.

"She was a bad friend." I mumble. I hate to say bad things since she's dead but she was. No good friend would sleep with her best-friends boyfriend. I'd never do that to Lydia. "I'm so glad I met you, Lyds."

"Me too bitch. I'm pretty sure you saved my life." She reveals.

"What do you mean?"

"My head wasn't in a good place before you came. I was thinking really ... destructive things. And I couldn't stop myself." She reveals, gnawing on her bottom lip, "then you came into my life and they dulled down into a silence."

"Lydia.." I mumble feeling a strong urge to comfort her, but considering our current situation that would be a bad idea unless we wanted to end up in the sea. "If you ever think those things again, I'm here for you without judgment - just to listen to you talk." If someone offered me that a year ago, I would've declined in a heartbeat which is why I'm expecting her to say no.

"Of course. You're my ride or die, bitch. I'd tell you anything, including this. But sometimes I just feel stupid after everything you've gone through and endured."

"Lydia-" I try to interrupt to let her know that she's allowed to have struggles, mine don't effect hers. They're not intertwined.

"I know." She stops me, understanding what I was going to say, "but Layla, I don't think you realise how much you've gone through to be where you are now. You're my inspiration. What all of those people did to you, how they shattered you into a million pieces and how you've managed to piece all of those pieces of yourself back together to be here, now confuses me. I don't know if many people could've. You're the strongest girl I've ever met." She tells me, and I find a find tears dripping down both of our cheeks.

"I love you." I tell her and I really mean it. If it took all of what I went through to meet her, I'd do it all over again.

"I love you too." She says, taking my hand as we continue to watch the sunset in comfortable silence.

Our heads snap towards the ripples in the water and I smile when I see two familiar faces, and their kayak drifting towards us.

"Well hello girlies." Myles grins as he and Reece pull up beside us.

"Where's Grayson?" I ask, nervously scanning the water below us either side, expecting him to come out at any point.

"We lost-"

Our boat gets tipped up.

"Him." Reece finishes his sentence as both Lyds and I emerge from the water, with a huge smirk on his face.

"I just got dry, you dipshits!" Lydia cries.

I turn when something touches my foot.

"Grayson get off my foot now, it's not funny." I shout.

"I'm not on your foot, baby." He whispers from behind me, grabbing my waist and dunking me under the water with him. Now I have salt water up my nose and in my eyes.

When I come to the surface again, I lean on the boat, at the rub my eyes to get the salty water out of them.

"What's wrong?" Grayson asks, a concerned frown etched on his face.

"Seawater is in my eyes."

"Let me see." He mumbles as he tilts my chin up and tries to force my eyes open. I flick his hands away before deciding to scold him.

"I can't open them because they're too painful, you dickhead." I say, and he lets out a chuckle.

"I have a towel, if you want it?" Myles says from his kayak.

"Yes please."

The towel gets thrown at my face and then lands in the water. I feel a presence behind me and I jump out of my skin when I feel soft dabs to my eyes in attempts to help me.

When I can finally open my eyes, I notice that Lydia is in the other kayak, leaning her head against Reece's chest as they laugh between themselves.

"Looks like you're with me, sweetheart." Grayson winks from behind me, his hands still on my waist.

Once we're back on the kayak, I lean back into Grayson as well, as his hand runs circles on the bare skin of my right thigh.

"I feel so fucking single." Myles spits out, after about five minutes, looking over at us in disgust.

"I'll come cuddle with you Myles." I offer, trying to get up but obviously Grayson only winds his arms around my waist tighter.

"Caveman behind you won't let you." He glares at Gray.

"When he's sleeping, I'll sneak off."

"Well, looks like I'm not sleeping ever again." Grayson jokes.

A whistle blows from back on the beach, signalling that our time is up and we need to go back. I decide to just let Grayson paddle, he's got bigger muscles than me.

When we get back to the house, Grayson seems to disappear.

Reece, Myles and Lydia made the decision to quickly run to shops to get barbecue stuff for tonight.

I try to look around for him everywhere, but he's literally not inside. I only come across the sight of his figure when I'm walking past the windows upstairs. He's on the beach.

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