I felt like I owe you this after not publishing for so long. This is a tiny chapter, but I felt like it wouldn't really fit in along with the previous or next chapter. So here you go. I don't know how other people feel when they cry, but this is how it feels to me. And also, there's a wee bit of fluff in this one.

***

I hugged my Nana yet another time, squeezing her as close as humanly possible. "I love you, I'll see you soon, right?"

She moved some hair out of my face with a smile and teary eyes. "Of course, as soon as possible, right?"

I nodded and then turned to my grandfather. Very carefully I wrapped my arms around him, giving him a quick squeeze. "Pops, promise me that you'll... do what the doctor says, right?"

He smiled and placed a quick kiss on my cheek. "Don't worry about me, baby bunny, everything is gonna be alright, it'll all work out somehow, I know it," he tightened his hand around mine for a second, before finally letting go. With a deep breath, I turned around and left the room, waving to them as Alllen and my parents and I walked down the hall. They stood in the open doorway, waving back at us, until we finally reached the end of the b-hall, and left out of the electric doors.

When we reached the car, we all stayed quiet. I rested my head against the headrest, my eyes closed. Time passed in a blur, and soon enough, we'd stopped. When I opened my eyes, to my surprise, we were in front of my parents' apartment building.

My parents and I got out of the car together, Allen thankfully staying behind this time, but still observing me closely from behind- I could feel him looking at me. I hugged my parents more quickly than I'd usually do- I just wanted to go home. Go home so I could curl up into a ball and scream and sob until the pain numbed.

I whispered a quick 'bye', my voice threatening to break as I did, before I ran to the car and got into the passenger seat, my heart throbbing painfully against my rib. My head found it's lace against the headrest, and I stayed quiet, my throat aching with the sobs trying to escape. I balled my hands into tight fists to stop them from shaking- every muscle was tense, tightened to the breaking point to prevent my body from shaking with sobs.

"Love, is... is everything alright? If you're worried about seeing them again... we can make it a weekly thing if you'd like. I don't want you to feel like I'm trying to keep you from your family..."

Shaking my head, I breathed deeply through my nose a few times. "I'm fi-ine," I whispered, my voice breaking as I did. "Really,"

I didn't open my eyes to look, but I felt his eyes on my face. But he, thankfully, remained quiet. The drive went on, for what seemed like forever this time- probably only because I was so eager to get back.

"I'll respect your privacy, Love, but I just need to know; do I have anything to do with why you're upset?"

I shook my head, a tear streaming down my cheek. I gritted my teeth. Make it stop, please, dear God, I just want it to stop.

The car stopped, and I peeked my eyes open. Red light, damnit. Quickly closing my eyes again, I realized the fight was already lost- my tears were running quietly down my cheeks, there was no stopping it now. I'd just have to get back to my room before I turned hysteric.

The car stopped once again, and this time there was a jackpot. I all but threw myself out of the car and darted for the door. Less than a second later I was past the first flight of stairs, and in the next second, I was by my room door.

THrowing it closed behind me, I headed for the bed, burying my face in the pillows and blankets the second I hit it.

The pain in my chest was evolving- burning. It was spreading, becoming hotter, more angry. I screamed into the pillow and hugged it close to my chest, trying to find some form of relief. Images flew by in my mind.

Pops in a wheelchair, his grey hair shaved off his head, and legs too weak to carry him.

Pops in a hospital bed, all alone.

A casket at the end of a long room with benches aligned along the side, no flowers on top of it because it was too expensive.

Another scream tore its way through my lungs. I pressed my legs as close to my chest as I possibly could. The smaller I am, the smaller the pain will be. The smaller I am, the smaller the pain will be.

I turned away from the door when I heard a soft knock. "I know I said that I'd stay out of it, but Love, this is too much, please I beg you, tell me what's wrong,"

I looked over my shoulder. Allen took a seat behind my legs, concern filling his eyes. I clutched my stomach and whimpered as another wave of pain hit me. "My... my grandpa... pops..." I sobbed again, pushing my face into the pillows.

"Yes?" Allen whispered, soft patience in his voice.

Finally pulling my face out of the pillow, I turned my face over my shoulder. "He... the cancer... its... its..." the shakes wouldn't stop. No matter what I did, my body just wouldn't. Stop. Shaking.

Realisation filled his eyes. "Oh, right... there isn't much I can do about... that,"

My chest contracted, the pain rendering my lungs useless. I gasped for breath, trying to get some air, just the tiniest bit of it into my lungs. Make it stop, make it stop. The pain-filled my lungs like black bile, preventing the air from entering them properly.

Suddenly, strong, warm hands wrapped around my arm and my side and pulled me close to a warm hard surface. "Shhh, Love, calm down, relax. Listen to my breathing, alright? Listen to my breathing." The panic was clearly evident in his voice, despite his clear attempt to keep it hidden. But something in my brain registered his words along with his tone.

Still gasping for breath, I tried my best to actually feel the movement against my side. His chest would expand for two seconds, then flatten for two seconds, then expand for another too.

I mimicked the motion to the best of my ability, a sob occasionally breaking the rhythm and sending me back to panicked hysterics, to which Allen would always just whisper for me to follow his breathing, with a never-ending patience.

When I finally calmed down, I had no possible idea about how much time had passed. I could be ten minutes, it could be a hundred, but when I finally calmed down, I realized that Allen was softly rocking me from side to side, stroking my hair as he did. "Feeling better now?" he whispered into my ear, worry still evident in his tone.

I nodded and pressed my face against his shirt. "I think so,"

His chest rose and fell deeply against my face, and finally, silence fell over the room, except for the thud-thud-thud sound of my own heartbeat resonating in my ears. "I'm so sorry, Love, I wish there was something more I could do... goddess I'm happy that I'm getting them to a good place," he kept his voice to a whisper.

"Me too... I want him to be happy for... the last few months," the pain twisted like a knifes blade inside my heart, but somehow I managed to stay somewhat calm.

We sat in the silence for a few seconds, before he started moving, his hand untangling from its position in my hair. "I better go now.." he whispered.

"No. Stay, please,"

He turned around, shock filling his eyes at my request, and I felt the exact same emotion flooding through my veins, but I still knew exactly why I'd asked. He was warm, and his arms felt safe, and the way he nuzzled my hair had already been making me drowsy- I didn't have the energy to cry myself to sleep.

"You sure?"

I nodded, a tear rolling down my cheek as I did. I didn't know why, I just knew that I needed him there, needed someone to hold me, and comfort me, and distract me from the pain.

He looked me over for a second, before slowly walking back to the bed, and sitting down. Before he'd even gotten into a (what I'd imagine being) comfortable sitting position, I had already pressed myself up against his chest.

My instincts, my mind was screaming at me to get the hell out of there, to run as far as I could for as long as I could, until I was sure that I'd never have to see him again- and yet I stayed there, curled up against him, my silent tears staining his shirt.

A soft humming began, so soft that at first, I thought I'd imagined it. But soon the tune changed, to something I'd never heard before. "Are you singing?" I whispered, looking up at him, his face only illuminated by the light from my small beside lamp that he'd turned on before he'd sat down, and the moonlight coming from the window above the headboard.

"I'm humming, it would always calm me when my mom did it when I had to sleep. Don't worry Love, go to sleep, I'm right here- I'm not going anywhere," he whispered, and softly pressed my head against his chest once again- I didn't have the energy to resist. The soft, unfamiliar tune continued, and after what felt like just a few seconds, it had lulled me to sleep.

A/N

Most of ya'll had been dying for a bit of a turningpoint so here you go. I love you guys.