"Damn you, Hunter!" bulalas ko nang magpakita sa akin si Hunter kinabukasan matapos ang katarantaduhan niya kahapon.

Rashid left me with this motherfucker. Ramdam ko ang inis niya nang iwanan niya ako at hindi ko na nahabol nang umalis. Kaya naman pagkaalis niya'y puno ng pagmumura ko ang shop ni Lerwick.

Hunter covered my mouth and peeked outside. "He's fucking mad at me, do you know that-"

Sinipa ko ang paa niya. "Ofcourse, he should! Nakakainis ka. Sabi ko na nga ba't palpak ang mga plano mo!"

Tinulak ko siya palayo sa akin. I don't know why he had to pull me out of the blue and hide me in a dark area. Someone might think something weird if they saw us here. Sumandal siya sa kabilang dingding at natatawa sa inis ko.

"Galit siya sa akin, Gianna. Do you get it? My plan is working." pagyayabang niya.

I combed my hair and laughed sarcastically. "Do you want me to rejoice because of that? He's mad at me, too, Hunter. Dahil sa kagaguhan mo."

"That's easy. Important is.. he's reacting towards my plan. Halos suntukin na ako kanina ng gago. See? He blew his mind away. I wasn't even trying my best." humalukipkip siya.

"At anong gagawin ko ngayon? Tanga ka talaga."

"Write him a love quote, tutal doon ka naman magaling-"

"Fuck you."

"Just kidding!" Humagalpak ang tawa niya at iiling iling. "Puntahan mo. He's just a small fierce kitty, Gianna. Yes, he's fierce but he's just a kitty."

"I have to attend my class, hindi ko siya mapupuntahan."

Ngumuso siya at tumingala, tila nag-iisip. "I think he'd drop off the tattoo shop this afternoon. Agahan mo, baka maabutan mo." he pushed himself out of the wall and walked in front of me. Yumuko siya. "You're welcome, Gianna."

I rolled my eyes. "Fuck off."

He bit his lips and in a quick move, he sniffed my hair. Suminghap ako at tinulak siya palayo.

He chuckled playfully. "Sungit." pagkatapos ay iiling iling na umalis sa harapan ko.

Iritado akong umirap. Ang tarantadong si Hunter ay hindi na matapos tapos ang kasalanan sa akin. Hindi ko maipagkakailang may tulong naman siya kahit papaano pero nakakainis pa din talaga siya.

Even add my annoyance towards my father at home. Nakauwi na si Mom kagabi at ang sabi niya'y tulad ng dati, sa opisina siya nagpalipas ng gabi. We didn't talk about our fight but atleast, I told her I was sorry. Meanwhile, my father, didn't come home. Mom was guessing he was with his mistress, either the first or the second one, we don't know.

Hindi ko nakita si Rashid maghapon. Balak ko din sana hanapin pero may iilan akong schoolwork na tinapos. Hindi man halata pero nag-aaral naman ako ng maayos. I ignored Julian, iyong manliligaw ko na malapit ko nang bastedin. I planned to text him but I was really busy, isa pa ay wala ako sa mood dahil iyon nga, hindi ko nakita si Rashid buong araw.

"So what's going on with you and Rashid now?" Shae asked out of the blue while walking since we're both out.

Nilingon ko siya sa biglaang tanong. "Nothing. Asa ka namang meron.." ngumuso ako at biglang nalungkot.

"Wala pa ba? So it means, he's still single?"

Kumunot ang noo ko. "He's always been single.."

"I mean, wala bang.. babae? Sabi mo magmomove on ka na? So he's free to have girls now?"

I don't know why she's asking me that. He can have girls since nothing's between us. But if she's asking if its okay for me, well.. I guess it is. Wala naman akong karapatan para humindi. And besides, baka nga mayroon na! The girl he talked to in the library, nagpuntahan pa sila ng bahay.. baka sila na.

"I don't get your point, Shae. Bakit? Do you know someone who likes him?"

Umiling siya agad. "Wala, ah. Natanong ko lang.. Making sure if you're really moving on from that guy."

"You know what.." nanliit ang mga mata ko. "I realized that maybe I wasn't really doing my best for him to notice me. Maybe I was-"

"Oh, come on!" sinapo niya ang noo niya. "I knew you weren't serious about that. Hay naku, Gianna. Wala na yatang mas rurupok pa sayo!"

"Hey!" I frowned. "Hindi, ah! I'm just being optimistic in times of cowardliness!"

"Ewan ko sayo. Ipagpapasalamat ko na lang at hindi ka ganoon kalala gaya ng dati! Kulang na lang matakot ako sa mga tumatakbo sa utak mo! Mabuti na lang talaga!"

Oh, you don't know about that, Shae. I'm more scared of me now. I'm more into it and I know I can be more into it even more. And by that time, I knew I cannot hinder it anymore.

Hunter said Rashid might be at the tattoo shop by now. Kaya ano pa ba ang gagawin ko? Syempre, guluhin muli siya!

Sampung minuto ang naging byahe ko dahil maluwag naman ang kalsada. I almost got lost because I didn't really memorize the exact location. But as I saw the small store near that shop and the vandalized dirty wall, I stopped and parked my car.

I swiped my chapstick on my lips and sprayed my Juniper Sling fragrance. My face is bare just like usual. I really doesn't put make up sometimes but I love collecting them. I smiled at my rear mirror and grabbed my Hermes as I walked out.

Pinasok ko ang shop. To my surprise, may tao na sa lobby nila. Isang babaeng mukhang maldita ang mata. Pula ang lipstick at makapal ang make up. Ngumunguya ng bubble gum habang pinagmamasdan ako. She stared at my shining red Hermes bag.

I smiled in a friendly way. "Hi, may I ask-"

"May appointment ka?"

"Wala pero-"

She rolled her eyes. "Wala naman pala. Hindi pwede. Isa pa, hindi ito salon o mall, hija. Baka nagkakamali ka lang.." she smiled sarcastically.

Hold up, who's this woman.

Tumaas ang dalawang kilay ko. I swear, I'm not even doing anything. Her red popping lipstick doesn't trigger me at all, even her full glam make up. Mine's natural but atleast I don't need make up to glam.

"I'm trying to be a good costumer, why don't you start having manners, too? Employee ka, 'diba? Aren't you taught to be respectful towards your costumers?" I fired.

"Sino ba nagsabing employee ako? I'm the girlfriend of the owner, if you don't ask-"

"Sabbina." bumukas ang pintuan sa loob at iniluwa ang mukha ni Lerwick.

Madilim ang tingin niya sa babaeng mukhang mas maarte sa akin. I crossed my arms on my chest and raised my eyebrow to the woman, waiting her to react towards Lerwick.

"What? Sabi mo magbantay ako dito-"

"Oo at hindi ko sinabing mang-away ka ng costumer. What are you doing?"

They fought in front of me.

Tumuwid ang tayo ng Sabbina. She glared at me. "Oh, she's a costumer now. Akala ko ba pinsan mo ito noong nakaraan? Ang dami mong dahilan, Lerwick!"

Nanlaki ang mata ni Lerwick at tumingin sa akin. "What are you saying? That's Gianna!"

"The hell I care about this bitch's name!"

"What did you say?" humakbang ako pero kaagad pumagitna si Lerwick sa amin. I glared at her. "You're a bitch. Hindi ako nandito para sayo!"

Kung hindi lang nakaharang ang matayog na lamesa dito sa lobby ay kanina ko pa nahila ang buhok ng babaeng ito. God, she called me a bitch when I didn't do anything to piss her off in the first place!

Lerwick sighed heavily and faced the woman. "Sabbina, I'll have ask you to leave first. May trabaho akong iniwan sa loob kaya pwede ba?"

"Asshole! Talagang aalis ako!"

"We will talk about-"

"No! Talk to your ass!" she shouted before leaving.

Naiwan ang bibig kong nakabuka matapos ang pag-alis ng babae. I pursed my lips and tried not to make any noise because Lerwick was sighing very heavy right now. I'm really fond of lover's quarrel because I experience it sometimes. And I tell you, its really stressing.

Tinapik ko ang balikat ni Lerwick. "I'm sorry. Hindi ko sinasadyang makipag-away sa girlfriend mo."

He nodded and clenched his jaw. "I'm sorry, too. She's really fiery sometimes. Napagkamalan ka pang ibang tao."

I shrugged, "Is she pretty than me, though?" I tried to joke.

He chuckled at iiling iling sa akin. "You're here for Rashid, am I right? Hindi naman siguro para kay Hunter."

Sumandal ako sa lamesang mataas at napanguso sa tanong niya. "Nand'yan ba siya?"

"Wala." he smirked. "Pero mamaya, darating 'yon. You can wait inside if you want.."

"Sure!" masigla kong sabi at pumasok na sa loob kasunod niya.

A bunch of people were inside. Taga ibang university, they were like older than me or just as my age. Some men were looking at me while I sat on the near plastik chair. Kasalukuyang tinatattoo ang kaibigan nila at siguro, narito sila para manood. They were loud so I stayed quiet while waiting for Rashid.

Dalawampu't minuto ang tinagal ay wala pa din si Rashid. I peeked at my phone and saw that it was almost 5. Natapos na ang trabaho ni Lerwick at nagsimula siyang magligpit habang nakikipagbiruan.

Tumayo ako para magpasyang umalis nalang. Hinalili ng mga lalaki ang upuan ko kanina at doon nagtawanan. I approached Lerwick.

"Sigurado ka bang pupunta si Rashid rito?" I asked him.

He stopped removing his plastic gloves just to respond to me. "I'm sure he said he'll come by, Gianna. Madalas kasi ay tatambay muna 'yon sa billiards bago pumunta rito para yayain ako uminom."

Billiards.. he does that, too? Well, okay. But what? Yayain uminom? Pagkatapos ng klase, ganoon?

Ngumuso ako at naupo sa reclining chair habang nag-aayos siya. "Nagsusugal siya? Tapos kapag natalo, iinom kayo?"

He chuckled while turning his back to fix his table. "Hindi naman iyon natatalo. Kung ano ang napalanunan niya, iyon ang iiinom namin!"

"So you always drink here?"

"Minsan dito, minsan kila Hunter. His family is religious, you know, kaya lahat ng katarantaduhan niya ay sikreto."

My mouth went oval because of the new information. "Does he always smoke.. you know.." I didn't want to finish it.

He looked at me and smirked like he knew what I'm thinking. "Weeds? Yes. And he does worst that that," turo niya sa akin. "He's too dangerous for a sweet girl like you. Baliktad ang mundo niyo."

I licked my lips and didn't talk. Pinagsisipa ko ang paa ko habang nakatitig doon. I stared at my black shining shoes and pure white socks that's until my knees. Lerwick is right. He is indeed dangerous. In many ways, my parents wouldn't like him. But why am I still here.. waiting for him?

"But don't worry. He's harmless. Lalo pa't tingin ko.. kapag nagtagal, ikaw ang hindi niya kayang saktan sa lahat."

Nagkatinginan kami ni Lerwick. I didn't know how to react on that. Umiwas ako ng tingin at tumulala muli, I admit that I like him so much, kahit kailan ay hindi ko idedeny 'yan. But why do I feel so scared now?

Damn it, Gianna, nasaan ang tapang mo? Akala ko ba.. walang atrasan ito? I'm not scared of him at all. If I was then I should be already quitting since I knew about how reckless he is even before. Natatakot akong sumugal pa lalo. What if the feeling that I have right now will went deeper more than I expected? What if I just stand in a moment where all of the things I doesn't want him to do will just be okay for me? Paano kapag hinayaan ko siya sa dilim dahil mahal ko na siya?

The door opened and reveal the man I was waiting for too long. Nahanap niya kaagad ang umaasa kong mga mata. His hair, messy as usual. He was holding a paperbag as he stopped because he saw me.

"Rashid! Ikaw pala!" some boys called. "Dito ka muna!"

He removed his eyes on me and focused on those men instead. Lumapit siya doon. " Ano 'yan?"

"Jimuel got his tattoo! Inom tayo. Galing kang Paseo?"

Nagkatinginan kami ni Lerwick. He was still busy. Inipon ko ang hangin at nagpasyang bumaba sa reclining chair dahil lilinisin din ni Lerwick ang nakalatag doon. I helped him fix it since I still don't know if I should approach Rashid or what.

I licked my lips. "Dito kayo iinom ngayon?" I asked him.

He shrugged and pulled a high chair to place it where it should be. "I still need to drop off somewhere after this."

"Sabbina?" I asked.

Umangat ang tingin niya sa akin, tila nagulat na alam ko iyon. "Galit. Kailangang paamuhin, alam mo na. Tulad niyang aso mo.." lingon niya kila Rashid. "Mukhang galit. Paamuhin mo na."

I looked back at Rashid. I caught him looking at us intently. May kaunting kunot ang noo pero sapat na ang mga mata niya para masabing galit. All of the men around him were laughing while he's there.. with his sharp eyes, grim lips and puckered forehead.

"I'll help you," wika ko nang sinusubukang abutin ni Lerwick ang papel na nasa sulok ko. Yumuko ako para kunin iyon.

"Gianna," someone called. I thought it was Lerwick but the voice was more intense and deep.

Lumingon ako at nakitang nakatayo na si Rashid ngayon, handa nang puntahan ako. Intense flare was flashed on his eyes now. Bumaba ang tingin niya sa binti ko. Naihulog ko muli ang papel nang marealize kung ano ang nangyari.

He saw my butt! I mean.. my behind. I doubt that he only saw it since boys are already gazing my way and quietly murmuring!

He clenched his jaw and looked at Lerwick. "She's not an employer to help you clean your shits, Lerwick."

Tumawa si Lerwick sa likod. "Bro, I didn't ask her to help me. H'wag niyo akong dinadamay sa away niyo, ha."

"I'm sorry," I licked my lips. "I wanted to help Lerwick.."

"Are you trying to temp those men-"

"No!" nanlaki ang mata ko. "Ofcourse, not!"

"Then, me?" mas dumilim ang mata niya.

Kumurap kurap ako. "Hindi ko 'yon sinadya!"

"Why are you even here? Well, sorry, if you're looking for Hunter-"

"I was looking for you, Rashid!" pataas ng pataas ang boses ko pero siya'y nanatiling malalim at may galit pa din. I didn't care about those men trying to peek at me. Or even if they hear our conversation.

He clenched his jaw. "Paano pala ako maniniwala kung pagdating ko dito, ibang lalaki ang kausap mo?"

I heard Lerwick's low chuckle. Binalingan siya ng masama ni Rashid kaya itinaas nito ang dalawang kamay na tila sumusuko. Rashid groaned and in a swift move, he pulled my hand and left with him.

I was almost flying when he pulled me with his raging steps. He harshly opened the glass door and pulled me towards his red shining Fortuner. Itinapon niya ako sa harapan niya at parang ama na handang sabugan ng sigaw ang isang anak na sobrang pariwara.

"What's your problem? Pwede namang sabihin mong nagseselos ka, hindi iyong hihilain mo pa ako rito!" bulalas ko sabay kunot ng noo dahil hindi ko siya maintindihan.

He gritted his teeth in an impatient manner. "Can you stop playing your games with me as your victim?"

My mouth opened as I touched my chest because of being offended. "What game are you talking about?"

"Your silly game!" sinaraduhan niya ang daanan sa magkabilang gilid ko gamit ang parehong kamay. "Stop saying that you like me if its clear that you're not!"

"Rashid!" my eyes widened. "Anong sinasabi mo?"

"Is this how you really play, Gianna? Ako pala ang gusto mo pero maya maya ay nasa ibang lalaki ka? How'd you think I believe you?"

Ibang lalaki.. does he mean my other exes and ex-suitors? Fine, mali ako doon, inaamin ko. Pero kung ang tinutukoy niya ay si Hunter at ang naabutan niya kanina, that's stupid! Sinasabi ko na nga bang katarantaduhan lamang ang plano ng putragis na Hunter na iyon.

"Babastedin ko na si Julian.."

Lumamig ang mga mata niya sa akin at tinusok ng gigil ang ilalim ng pisngi. "See? I didn't even know about him. Meron na naman pala.."

Ngumiwi ako. "I was mad at you that time, kaya pinayagan ko siyang manligaw."

"Oh, that's what you do? Paano pala kapag lagi akong galit sayo-"

"Bakit ka kasi magagalit pa sa akin?"

"Because you're always lying."

Kumunot ang noo ko. "Babastedin ko na nga!"

"Its not just about that!" bulong niyang halos dikdikin na ako ng buhay. He leaned towards my side and breathed on my hair. "You have too many boys, Gianna. Hindi ko mabilang bilang..."

My breath hitched as I felt his breath tickled my ear. Tumagos ang bulong at hininga niya sa tenga ko at ibang parte ng leeg ko. Nanginig ang hininga ko habang umaakyat ang kamay ko sa kaniyang dibdib na tila iyon ang tanging bagay na maaaring kapitan sa panahon na limitado na ang hangin.

Hinaplos ng kaliwang kamay niya ang braso ko. A sensual move for me. No, everything he does is sometimes sensual. Or its just me who likes him so much that's why.

"You play to much before and even now.." he brushed his fingers upwards and downwards on my skin. "Siguro oras naman para ako ang magpapansin sayo. Hmm?"

Nagkatinginan kami. My heart was beating loudly, I doubt that he didn't hear it. Or if he still doesn't, my heavy breathing will atleast let him now.

Bumaba ang tingin niya sa nakaawang na labi ko. His eyes turned relaxed. Tunaw na ang inaalagaan niyang bloke ng yelo sa paligid niya. Now, all I see was his talking eyes and thirsty lips.

"Ngayon mo sabihing ako ang gusto mo, Gianna. Say it to my face." hamon niya. "Come on.. nasaan ang mga tapang mo?"

He looked at my hand as it showed how much I was holding my patience inside me. I was crumpling his shirt. Sumilay ang ngisi niya sa mukha, tila tagumpay sa isang bagay na matagal niyang hinahangad.

"Gusto kita," nanginig ng kaunti ang boses ko. "I like you, Rashid. I've always been.."

Ngumuso siya at namungay ang mata. "But my name's not Rashid when it comes to you, Gigi. I want it special.. I want you to only call me that."

"I like you.." I spoke.

"Hmm?" malambing na tugon niya.

I licked my lips and twinkled my eyes. "Ace."

We both stared each other's eyes, willing to get lost to the paradise inside it. His dark eyes will make a beautiful match with my ocean blue one. Our mixture will be as fierce because of his darkness but a little bit of hope because of my light.

He nodded, "Good girl.." and smiled, at last.