"You'll sleep on mine." he whispered on my ear as we walked our way through his suite.

Matalim ko siyang tinignan. "I don't like your tone."

"What?"

"You sound like you're going to wreck me!"

Sumabog ang garalgal na halakhak niya sa leeg ko. "Fuck, Gianna. I won't, okay? Just cuddle. We're both tired for that."

I hid a smirk. You see, Rashid. I'd be fine if you wrecked me tonight. Hindi ako magrereklamo. Pakiramdam ko, iyon din ang kailangan ko ngayon.

We ate lunch after we arrived from the island. Hindi masyadong maganda ang pakiramdam ko pagkababa sa bangka kaya naglakad lakad muna ako sa dalampasigan. He was tailing me the whole time. Nang mapagod ay bumalik kami sa resto para sa early dinner.

Tomorrow will be Hunter and Amber's wedding. Nakalimutan ko iyon. Rashid didn't told me about it but I remembered while walking in the seaside with him. If I will still stay here, surely he will stay too and he wouldn't go to the wedding. Kaya naman napag-isipan kong umuwi na bukas.

I told Rashid about it and he let me decide whatever I want. Mukhang kahit gustuhin kong manatili dito at h'wag um-attend sa kasal ay gagawin niya din.

But of course, its Hunter's wedding. If it's publicly announced, it will be one of the memorable wedding this year. Well, it's Cullen! What do you expect?

His room was at the same floor as mine. He said that it was a coincidence but who would believe that?

Naligo ako at nagbihis. Inayos ko na din ang mga gamit ko bago pumunta sa kwarto niya. He was all set when I came. Nakatayo sa veranda at nakasubo ang sigarilyo sa bibig. I stopped and stared at him for a while. Tinakpan ko ang ilong ko sa matapang na amoy.

"You still smoke?"

Binuga niya ang usok bago nagsalita. "Sometimes."

I nodded and sat on the sofa. Humikab ako kaagad nang maramdaman ang lambot ng sofa. Humiga na ako at inayos ang puting kumot sa katawan.

"Pang-ilan mo na 'yan?"

"Three.."

Ngumuso ako. Seems like he's going to smoke more. Well, that's fine. Mukhang ngayon lang naman siya naninigarilyo. It's okay.

He stared at me and cursed lightly. Tinapon sa labas ang kasisinding sigarilyo at dumiretso sa banyo. Pumikit ko sa pag-aakalang maliligo muna siya pero napadilat ako kaagad nang yumakap siya sa akin kasabay ng paghiga niya sa likod ko.

"Grumpy," he laughed. "You always ask me that before, you know? You're making me feel guilty.."

"Because we're supposed to sleep!"

"Yes.. Nandito na ako," malambing na usal niya.

"Akala ko ba maninigarilyo ka muna?"

"Galit na si misis, e." he chuckled and pulled me even closer to him.

I couldn't help to smile. Pinikit ko ang mga mata ko.

His arm will always be my resting place. Pakiramdam ko, isang haplos lang niya, ayos na ulit ako. Just like before, he's the only one who can tame me. The pulling trigger to my ticking bomb. He have bewitched my body and soul. Completely.

Nagising ako nang maramdaman ko ang pagduduwal. I immediately ran off Rashid's hug and ran to the bathroom. Gumalaw siya ng kaunti sa pag-alis ko. I even heard his rough moans. Sinindi ko ang shower para hindi niya marinig ang pagduduwal ko at h'wag siyang maistorbo.

Bumuntong hininga ako habang naghihilamos.

What the heck is this?

I'm not sick. It's not fever or whatever. Maayos ang pakiramdam ko pero tuwing hapon o tanghali hanggang gabi ay inaatake ako ng hilo. At kapag umaga'y pagduduwal naman ang gumising sa akin.

My face lighted up with my eyes widened.

The realization hits me. I panicked and shook my head fast. The running shower was loud to hide my gasps. Hinawakan ko ang tiyan ko.

When did we had.. last last week.. When was my last supposed period? Last monday. Sinapo ko ang bibig ko.

No.. That's impossible! This can't be..

Hindi ko alam ang gagawin ko. My hands were terribly shaking. As much as I want to think that its impossible, I couldn't. Sinapo ko ang noo ko at humugot ng buntong hininga.

You're just stressed, Gianna. You're not pregnant!

Naligo ako para umayos ang pakiramdam ko. It took me half an hour to finish. Paglabas ko ay naghihintay na si Rashid sa akin sa labas. I panicked when I saw him. Umiwas agad ako ng tingin.

"Nagpa-akyat ako ng breakfast. Are you okay?" he stood up and held my elbow carefully. "You're rushing to the bathroom."

"Huh?" maang-maangan na sabi ko. "Naiihi ako."

He nodded and tapped his lap. Bagong gising pa ang buhok niya pero nakakapigil ng hininga. Lumapit ako at naupo sa kandungan niya gaya ng gusto niyang mangyari.

He hugged me and buried his face on my breast. Lumunok ako at hinaplos ang buhok niya.

Questions in my head drained me. What if I was right? Buntis nga ako.. But what if he's not ready for that big responsibility? Pumikit ako ng mariin. I'm over reacting.

"You smell so good." he kissed my revealed chest and looked at me. "Can we stay here for a while? Bukas na lang tayo umuwi."

"Hindi pwede, Rashid." I said. "It's your friend's wedding."

"So?"

Umirap ako. "You need to be there, of course."

He sighed and didn't took off his eyes on me. "They're all getting married. When will I have my wedding, too?"

Natigilan ako. He doesn't even sound joking the way he asked and look at me. Nakatingin siya sa akin na para bang ako ang sasagot sa tanong niyang iyon!

"Am I supposed to answer that?"

"Well, you're the bride so.." he smirked.

I didn't know how to react. My heart was reacting so hard that I couldn't breath properly. Umiwas ako ng tingin at yumuko para itago ang mukha sa leeg niya. I heard his rough chuckle on my shoulder.

"You can't take back what you promised, Gianna. You said yes.. Naniningil lang ako ngayon."

I nodded and closed my eyes. "I'm not taking it back."

I'm not taking anything back. I will always say yes, anyway.. willingly.

Umalis kami pagkatapos mag-breakfast. The wedding was supposed to be after lunch so we need to rush. Hindi mapakali si Hunter sa katatawag kay Rashid hanggang sa makaalis kami sa Palawan. Even in the plane, he was yapping with Hunter on the texts.

Itinulog ko ang humihilab na hilo. I was scared I would throw up in the plane so I kept my head on Rashid's shoulder.

He woke me up after hours. Siya ang nagbuhat ng mga gamit namin. I excused myself to retouch. Pinahiran ko ang labi ko ng pulang lipstick dahil ang putla na ng labi ko.

"You should go. Ako na ang uuwi," I said to Rashid when he planned to drive me home when he should be dressing up by now.

"It's okay, Gianna. Maaga pa naman.."

I smiled. "I'm fine. Sige na, Rashid. We'll just text each other."

He sighed. "Are you sure?"

Tumango ako.

I was dizzy when I get home. Sapo sapo ko ang ulo ko habang sinasalubong ang bati ng mga maids. Humiga ako sa kama at tumitig sa ceiling saglit. Ilang minutong titig ay hinila ako ng antok.

Nagising ako nang maalimpungatan. My eyes widened because I'm supposed to go to the wedding today! Nag-panic ako at kaagad tumakbo sa shower. Nagmamadali ako sa pagligo at pagbihis. Issa was already calling me and telling me to just go straight to the reception because I missed the church wedding. Kasabay ang ang text ni Rashid at Dad para sa dinner mamayang gabi.

I sighed. Hindi ko pinansin ang text ni Dad. I didn't prepare any gift for the newly wed. Nang mahagip ko ang bag na hindi ko pa nabubuksan ay iyon na lang ang hinablot ko. It's still sealed with the fancy paperbag of Prada. I think this is fine for Amber. I hope she likes it.

I wore a white off shoulder dress and a white stilettos. I curled my hair and styled it with loosed braids on the sides. Kaunting make-up lang ang ginawa ko. I took so long finishing my look. Nang nilingon ko ang orasan ay kita kong masyado na akong late!

Halos lumipad na ako para makarating lang sa enggrandeng hotel kung saan ang reception. I parked my car in the parking lot. It's five in the evening. Dinig ko ang music sa loob. Gosh, you're so late, Gianna Bryn.

I made my way to the entrance. Ngumiti ako sa guard. They know me. Hindi ko na kinailangang magpakilala. They let me in without hesitation.

The hotel's garden was fully decorated. Kita ko ang ilaw sa loob. Maraming bisita ang mokong na si Hunter, may nakita pa akong artista na papasok din.

Sa entrance ay kita ko ang paglabas ni Celina Añonuevo. She was wearing a red formal dress. Ang itim na mamahaling bag niya ay nagpapatunay na hindi siya ganoon ka-ordinaryong tao. Maging ang mga alahas sa leeg at kamay ay nakakahiyang tapatan. I stopped and was stunned to see her.

She saw me first. Malamig ang mga mata niya sa akin at bumaba ang tingin sa hawak kong paperbag at pouch ko. I swallowed hard and didn't know if I should greet her. Binalewala ko ang kaba at lumapit sa kaniya.

"Good afternoon, po.. Ma'am." I awkwardly said.

She stared me like I was someone who doesn't fit the crowd at all. She's very intimidating. The Añonuevo blood, I guessed.

"I see you're late," she acknowledged.

I nodded and slightly bowed. "I wasn't really feeling well a while ago.."

"Then you should've stayed at home, hija." she smiled sarcastically. "Hindi pa maayos ang pakiramdam mo n'yan? I heard you just had your vacation."

"Uh.. I was in Palawan for work. And yeah, I had my vacation but that just didn't quite help." hindi ko maiwasang tumabang ang boses.

"Why? Isn't my son with you?"

My eyes lifted up on her. Kita ko ang medyo kunot ng noo niya na tila hindi gusto ang sinabi. I knew from the start that she doesn't like me at all. I didn't really think about it much not until now.

Yumuko muli ako. "Hindi ko po alam na pupunta siya doon.."

"We both know how busy my son is, hija. He's a busy business man and an attorney at the same time. Do you know how many conference meetings abroad he skipped and how many opportunities of client he declined?"

"I-I didn't know.."

"I'm not just talking about the recent ones. Maraming beses, hija, sa ilang taon." nanliit ang mga mata niya sa akin.

Umangat baba ang dibdib ko. Hindi ko alam kung paano magsasalita. I want to get mad but she's Mrs. Añonuevo. I took a deep sigh to calm myself.

"I think you're mistaken, Ma'am. Hindi ko po hiniling na gawin niya 'yon. It was your son who wanted to do it."

"Yes and now you're taking it for granted." she gritted her teeth. "You shamelessly want his attention so bad. When it's not for you in the first place."

Kumunot ang noo ko. "I'm sorry, Ma'am, but I think that's not right. It's not me who wants his attention. He wants mine that's why he did all of those."

"I can't believe you're Flora's daughter." she hissed. "No wonder why your father choose to live with Rebecca and abandon you!"

Nanlaki ang mata ko. "My father didn't abandon me!"

Umatras siya sa sigaw ko. Kita ko ang gulat at galit sa mata niya. My eyes heated on the sides.

"How dare you talk to me like that.."

"As much as I want to respect you, Ma'am, you're already crossing the line. You shouldn't look at the picture by just looking at a single person and not considering other people's view. Do not talk to someone like you know their pasts and everything that is happening in their lives." I gritted my teeth. "I'm sorry, Ma'am, but if you think that I'm an abandoned child.. then I'd rather be one than having a father who doesn't know what a family means."

Without any farewells, I left her there. Pinigilan ko ang pagtulo ng galit na luha sa mata.

Pumasok ako sa loob na nanginginig ang kamay. I searched for Rashid in the middle of the busy people. Sa isang mahabang lamesa sa gilid, naroon sila Hunter at ang iba pang kasama. I desperately wanted to be there but I stopped when I saw who was beside Rashid.

The group was smiling. Issa was there, giggling with Zhianela. Malawak ang ngiti ni Elizabeth habang nilalaro ang bata sa hita ni Rashid. He was looking down to the infant. Aliw ang mga mata niya sa bata habang si Elizabeth ay nakatitig lang sa kaniya. They look like a happy family in New Year's eve.

Umatras ako. Para akong binagsakan ng langit at lupa. I touched my tummy. My heart was tore into pieces seeing them like that. Tumalikod ako at lutang na inabot ang regalo sa waiter na nakasalubong ko. Sinunod niya ang gusto ko. I didn't spend another minute there. I left.. with my heart completely torn apart.

I want to cry and tell all the things that hurts me the most but the thing is, who will listen? Who will be there to watch me cry and break down? Hindi ko alam. It's probably just me.. alone.

Hinaplos ko ang tiyan ko. If my hunch is right, I will going to take care of my child. I'm going to give all of my love until my very best. Gagawin ko ang mga bagay na kahit kailan, hindi ko naranasan sa buhay ko. I will let him decide what he wants. Even in the humblest thing, I will always be there.

Before, I thought my dream was to be either in front of the camera or at the back of it. I've always wanted that. But thinking how to raise my child and do the things I never experience as a kid, I think it's even awesome. A thing that I will love to do for the rest of my life.

My child will grow up with the lessons I've learned in my life. I lived having a father but the truth is, I did not. At kung wala mang ama ang anak ko, tutumbasan ko ang pagmamahal ng ama sa kaniya. If that's what it takes.

Tumunog ang cellphone ko sa kalagitnaan ng traffic. I didn't want to talk to anyone not until I saw that it was my Dad. Sumandal ako at sinagot ang tawag.

"Dad.."

"Hija, are you coming? Galing ka ba sa kasal?"

I looked at my watch and sighed. "Yes."

"Galing din si Elizabeth doon, hija. Did you happen to see her there? She'll be here later, too."

Matabang akong ngumiti at tumingin sa daan. "Hindi ko siya napansin.. I'll drop the call, Dad. Malapit na ako."

"Take care, Gianna."

It took me a while to arrive at the restaurant my father choose. Huminto kasi muna ako sa pharmacy para bumili ng pregnancy test. I need to be sure about this. At kapag sigurado na ako, doon ako magdedesisyon.

I was a bit dizzy when I get there. I saw my father at the table with Rebecca on her side. Napatayo sila pareho nang makita ako. I smiled at bit and went to kiss my father.

"Are you okay, hija? Namumutla ka," puna ni Dad. Naupo ako.

Nagkatinginan kami ni Rebecca. She glanced away and cleared her throat.

"I'm fine."

I wasn't comfortable in the next few minutes. Panay ang simsim ko ng tubig habang nagbabatian kami ni Dad. Rebecca was looking at me and just listening. Minsan ay nakikisali siya at ako naman ang mananahimik at makikinig.

They both stood up to acknowledge their daughter's presence. Hindi ako tumayo at nanatiling malamig na nakatingin sa plato.

"How was the wedding, hija?" Rebecca said with her sweet tone.

Nagtiim-bagang ako at nagsimulang maghiwa ng steak kahit hindi pa man din sila nagsisimula.

She sat beside me. I heard her giggles. "Ayos lang, Ma. They're all friendly. I also had a few minutes of talk with the bride. She's friendly."

"That's good." Dad nodded. "How about Rashid, hija? Are you doing fine with him?"

Ngumisi si Elizabeth at nilingon ako. "He was sweet to me. Sabi niya babawi siya kaya sa tingin ko, ito ang tinutukoy niya."

Hilaw akong ngumisi. This delusional bitch. Gusto pa yata akong inggitin sa mga iyon. She wouldn't want me to brag about her Rashid because if I did, she'd be lying on the ground with full of bubbles on her mouth!

"Dumalo si Celina doon, ah? I'm hoping you met her."

Nagkatinginan kami ni Elizabeth. She smiled at my father. "Yes, Dad. Pero maagang umalis dahil mayroon daw bumastos sa kaniya."

My eyes slightly widened. Kita ni Elizabeth ang gulat sa mata ko.

"What? And you let that happen, hija?" Rebecca reacted.

"I didn't saw what happened, Mama. Nalaman ko lang noong nilapitan ako ni Tita Celina. Well, I guess Gianna really showed her attitude too much."

Natigilan ako nang banggitin niya ang pangalan ko. Hindi kaagad nakapagsalita si Dad at maging ang kabit niya. Umawang ng kaunti ang labi ko para ipagtanggol sana ang sarili ko pero nauna ang galit ni Dad.

"What did you do, Gianna?"

"Dad, I was just defending myself."

Elizabeth chuckled. "Just tell them you got offended when she told you that you're an abandoned child."

Nanlalaki ang mata kong nilingon ko siya. "I'm not!"

"Oh, you are. It's the truth. What? You can't accept it even more because it was Rashid's mother who slapped you the truth?" she fired. "You just can't accept that you're being such a burden to Rashid that's why even his mother doesn't like you!"

"Shut up!" I screamed and stood up.

"Gianna, that's enough!" si Dad ang sumigaw at tumayo.

They all stood up and looked at me like I was the villain right here.

I looked at him with a disappointed look. Nangilid ang luha ko na parang ako pa ang may kasalanan ng lahat. Na parang ako ang laging mali. Na parang hindi ako kailanman naging tama.

"Let her be, Dad. What can you expect? She's such a snake. Inahas niya si Rashid sa akin!"

Kumunot ang noo ko. "That's a lie! I did not do that!"

Pumikit ng mariin si Dad. "Gianna, enough.."

Few people were looking at us. The waiter was curious and didn't know if they should approach us or not.

My head is spinning. Hindi ako kaagad nakapagsalita dahil sa hilo. I held someone's arm just for my support but she pushed me. Sumigaw si Elizabeth at hinawakan ang braso niya na tila ba sinaktan ko siya.

"Ikaw pa talaga ang may karapatang manakit! You're the one who stole everything from us. You deserve to be hated, Gianna. You're a fake! Sana alam 'yan lahat ng sumusuporta sayo!" she shouted.

"Elizabeth, that's enough." I heard Rebecca said.

Matalim ang tingin ko kay Elizabeth. "You're such a pity, Elizabeth. You keep on owning a man that doesn't even care about you. It's me that he cares about all this time. Not you."

"That's not true!"

"You said he got bored with me. Then why is he still not satisfied with you now after all the years I was gone? The truth is, he still wants me. From the beginning until now. Ako pa rin, Elizabeth." I said while she took steps. "Masakit ba? Na mas malala ka pa pala sa akin. You're being abandoned many times yet you still believe your manias. Guess what, Elizabeth? You are delusional."

"Fucking bitch!" she attacked me.

I was breathing heavy as she pulled my hair. Kasabay ng sakit sa anit ay ang hilo ko na halos hindi na ako makadilat. With all of my strength I pushed her away.

Napaupo siya sa sahig. Nanlalabo ang paningin ko at tanging sigaw lang ni Dad at Rebecca ang narinig ko.

"What did you do, Gianna!" My father shouted.

Umatras ako at naghanap ng maaaring makapitan. I couldn't take all of it. My father.. still thinks I'm the bad guy after all what happened.

Unti unting nagdilim ang paningin ko hanggang sa wala na akong makita pang muli.

Nagising ako nang may maramdamang humahaplos sa kamay ko. Bumungad sa akin ang puting kisame. My eyes flew to someone who held my hand. Nakilala ko kaagad si Cassandra na umiiyak habang hawak hawak niya ang kamay ko.

"Oh my god, Reign! She's awake!" she announced and looked at Reign beside