"Sino nagsabi sayo?"
"Si Hunter."
"That motherfucker." he pushed himself away from me and gritted his teeth. Nang kulang na lang ay sugudin niya si Hunter ay kumilos kaagad ako.
I pulled his shirt. "He didn't know, okay! Pareho kaming walang alam. Don't blame him."
Kumunot ang noo niya, tila may hindi naiintindihan. "Do you seriously like him, Gianna?"
"No!" my eyes widened. "Of course, not. What the hell?"
"Why do you defend him like that? Close kayo? You're always with me!"
Sinapo ko ang noo ko. "Rashid, I just don't want you to make a mess in the school. Bakit? Kung hindi kayo umalis 'nung Eloise gaya ng sabi ni Hunter, ano ang pinag-usapan niyo? Huh?"
"About something.."
My face went poker face. Inirapan ko siya at sinubukang lumayas sa harapan niya pero nahuli niya kaagad ang baywang ko. He pulled me just to kiss my ear and chuckled sensually on it.
He held my waist. "She's offering me friendship. I knew she's offering me something else so I declined."
"Why can't you just tell her that you already have a girlf.." I stopped, ".. someone!"
Gumuhit ang ngisi sa labi niya. "I tried to tell her, I swear. But she doesn't want to believe me."
Who would? All these time you didn't want a girlfriend. Umirap ako.
"Bakit ayaw mo? She's hot and pretty. Ayaw mo ba sa ganoon?"
"I'm taken, Gianna." hinalikan niya ang noo ko. "I have my girl waiting outside for me so why would I even accept her?"
Umirap ako at hindi pa din naniniwala sa kaniya. Sige, Gianna, I know you're smirking inside.
"And even if I'm single, I'll still decline her because she's not my type."
Ngumuso ako. "Ano pala ang type mo, kung ganoon?"
He pocked his inner cheek with his tounge and moved towards me.
"I like girls younger than me, smaller.." yumuko siya. ".. petite, narrowed eyes, red cheeks, cute heart shaped lips.." he touched my cheeks.
Umiwas ako ng tingin. "Stop."
"Very naughty, smells good all the time.." he chuckled. ".. gets super moody when jealous, being chased by skinny boys, loves photography, can't do piano and drums."
"Tapos ka na ba?" hinampas ko ng marahan ang balikat niya.
He smiled and I can see his genuineness. "I have so many things to discuss but to make it shorter.. I like you, Gianna."
I didn't talk. My face was all red because of it. Kita ko ang aliw niya sa mukha habang pinapanood akong hirap na hirap dahil doon. I bit my lips and lit my face on him because he was looking for my eyes.
"I'm sorry." namungay ang mga mata niya. "You were so mad, I guess, that you even allow that nerd to talk to you and spend some time."
Sumilay ang ngisi ko dahil doon. "Bakit? Kwits lang naman."
"Its not a competition, Gianna. Makikipagdate ka pa ba doon ngayon? Huh?"
I feel bad about Ivan because I already agreed to him. But I guess I don't have a choice now. Nakakainis naman. Baka ichismis pa ako sa campus na ganoon ang ginawa ko.
Ngumuso ako, kunyaring nag-iisip ng malalim. Sa ilang segundo kong ganoon ay palalim ng palalim ang masamang tingin niya sa akin.
"No. Of course, you won't." he decided for myself. "Ayaw ko."
I stared at him with all of my amusements. Nakakaaliw din pala siya tignan na angkinin ako na para bang isang laruan na ayaw mawala sa kaniya. I'll forever treasure this moment since I'm not sure if this will take forever.
Hindi ko na muli nakita si Rashid sa buong maghapon dahil gaya ng dati, may sarili din naman siyang ginagawa. But just like usual, we'll drop off Lerwick's shop later.
News about the recent mayor's activity was filled the campus' curiosity. Si Shae ay iyon din ang sinasabi sa akin maghapon. That's not the thing I was concerned of. Zhianela is the daughter of the current mayor and she's also one of the main issue of the campus right now.
"Maybe she tolerated her father, that's why. Kung nagsumbong na lang siya nang malaman niya edi sana tapos!" Shae commented and shook her head.
Kumunot ang noo ko. Zhianela isn't my closest friend and I don't know her that much but I'm not happy about Shae's comment about her.
"Maybe she doesn't know. We just can't talk ill about her when we still doesn't know her side."
"That's impossible, Gi. Ama niya iyon kaya siguradong alam niya."
"You're not sure about that. Isa pa, her father's mistake isn't hers at all. She's not the person to blame."
"Hay, ewan ko sayo, Gianna! Sabagay, you defend her because she's Issa's best friend. Sige, kayo na lang ang magbestfriend."
I didn't talk. Not because I don't want to but because I'm just trying to stop myself from speaking unappropriate things to her.
Bumuntong hininga ako. I'm not defending Zhian because she's my cousin's friend. I just think she's not the person to blame right now. It's not her fault. She's just the daughter.
I felt a little sad because of the issue. Kaya naman wala ako sa mood nang mauna akong dumating sa shop ni Lerwick.
He let me invade the whole room just like usual. May session siya at hindi ko na iyon makita dahil may nakaharang na kurtina doon.
Rashid entered the room and saw me staring at something. Ngumiti ako nang makita ko siya. He went to me and didn't mind Lerwick and his client beneath the curtain.
"Kanina ka pa?"
Umiling ako. "Its okay. Hindi naman ako nainip. Katatapos lang ng klase mo?"
He sighed. "Dylan fucked up. Pinuntahan namin siya."
Umahon ako sa upo dahil doon. He noticed my concern so he smiled a bit and caressed my head to ease my worries.
"He's okay. Nakipagsuntukan lang ng kaunti dahil lasing." he tsk-ed. "His face is bruised but he's fine. He looks good."
"Bakit daw nakipagsuntukan?"
"I don't meddle with his businesses." he said as he pulled a chair and placed it in front of me.
My legs is between his both knees. His legs were spreading widely in front of me and he's crouching a bit. He found my eyes. Siya ang kusang naghanap sa kamay kong nasa hita ko at hinaplos iyon. His eyebrow lifted a bit, finding something on my eyes.
"Sinuntok ka?"
He shook his head and crouched more to kiss my hand. "Papayag ba ako?"
"Tss." tumawa ako.
Humigpit ang hawak ko sa kamay niya. Nagkatinginan kami. Mahaha iyon na halos ayaw kong putulin dahil masyado akong nag eenjoy sa mata niya.
He clenched his jaw. He stared at me like he was tempting something inside him that he does not want to be out of the public.
He licked his lips. "I want to kiss you."
"Right now?"
"Damn it, Gianna." he laughed. "Tumanggi ka naman."
"E, bakit? Gusto ko nga."
"Let's do it later. I don't want Lerwick to see that."
Ngumuso ako. "Nothing's wrong with that. He knows you're crazy over me."
His mouth opened a bit. Tinusok tusok ng dila niya ang loob ng pisngi at umiling iling na tila hindi makapaniwala sa akin.
"Yeah. I guess I am.." he whispered.
Pagkatapos namin sa shop Lerwick ay dumiretso kami sa bahay niya. It was almost like my home that I was the one who opened the padlock just to get it. Nasa likod ko siya at pinapanood lang ako.
Hinubad niya ang suot na damit at nilapag lang sa tapat habang ako ay binubuksan ang bag para sa camera ko. I've spent time capturing different images that I will show him tonight. Well, those shots were amazing for me.
"That's beautiful," he commented as he saw a capture of me wearing a nighties and having a mirror shot.
Ngumuso ako. "Should I post it?"
Napawi ang aliw sa mukha at napalitan ng kunot ng noo. "Your choice. If you can tag me, that would be better."
"Pero wala ka naman?"
"Then let's take a picture together. Iyon ang i-post mo."
"Paano ito?"
"Send it to me. I'll post it."
"E, ako naman 'to!"
"Akin ka din naman."
I pursed my lips and looked away. I didn't know that everyday with him, a single heartbeat is adding and now.. I can't already count them with my hands alone.
The next thing I knew is that we're already kissing on his room. I was sitting on the bed while he was beside me, too. In a fast move he lift up my waist and put it on his lap. I was so eager that I spread my legs just to sit properly in front of him.
Nagkatinginan kami. I was catching breath when he looked down at my position.
Kinagat niya ang labi niya. "You're so naughty, Gianna. Damn it."
I kissed his lips to stop him from talking. Ang kamay ko ay sumasabunot sa buhok niya na mukhang gustong gusto naman niya. His kisses went down on my cheeks, ears, jaw and my neck. Tumingala ako habang sinasabunutan siya.
"Rashid.." I whispered as he played his tongue on my neck.
"Stay fucking still, Gianna." he firmly said when I moved my hips because of the sensation.
Bumagsak ang puwetan ko sa hita niya dahil sa pambabawal. I felt his pants moving and I knew what it was. Bumaba ang kamay ko sa hubad niyang dibdib at pababa doon. He stopped kissing when he knew what I was doing.
He breathed heavily on my ear just like me. My hand reached his mad member and he immediately growled on my ear. Kinagat niya ang tenga ko nang tuluyan kong sapuhin iyon.
It was large and hard. I never thought my hand would tremble when I reached for it. Sinubsob ni Rashid ang ulo niya sa leeg ko habang yakap yakap ang baywang para sa suporta. I stroked him just like how it does. I'm not innocent. He knows that. I watched porn and had made out with guys but I never done this! Damn it!
"Putang ina, Gianna.." malutong na mura niya sa leeg ko at ramdam ko ang mahinang kagat niya doon.
"Let me.." mahinang sabi ko at nagsimulang kalasin ang sinturon niya.
He held my hand to stop me. Umahon siya at nagkatinginan kami. Kita ko ang pungay ng mata niya at matinding pagpipigil din doon. He clenched his jaw.
"No."
"But you're so hard!" pagpupumilit ko.
"Something's going to happen if you continue what you want, Gianna."
I tilted my head. "So?"
"Fuck." tumawa siya at gigil na niyakap ako.
"Come on, Rashid.." panunuya ko.
He laughed now on my neck. "Sa akin ka lang ganito, 'kay? Please, Gianna. Sa akin ka lang.."
Kinagat ko ang labi ko habang sinusuklay ko ang buhok niya na parang bata na nakasubsob sa leeg ko. I saw a mirror just on the other side of the bed where I can see his large bare back hugging me in a grasping way.
"Say it.." kinalabit niya pa ang baywang ko.
"Say what?"
"Say that you're mine, Gi.."
Ngumiti ako at hinalikan ang pisngi niya. "I'm always yours."
"Whether in your good times and your anger times?"
Masuyo akong tumango ay humalik pa muli. "In any ways, Rashid."
I secretly pulled the camera with my feet. He was kissing my neck and mumbling words that he can only hear. Kinuha ko iyon sa kamay ko at binuksan habang nakayakap siya sa akin.
I clicked the camera. I took three shots of us. I giggled and ducked my head on his naked shoulder. My legs spreading between his hips was seen. His back looked masculine and can hid my body effortlessly. Nakasubsob ang mukha niya sa leeg ko at medyo nakatagilid ang mukha ko para bigyan siya ng espasyo. Nakayakap ang isang kamay ko sa buhok niya habang ang isa ay hawak ang camera at tinatakpan lang ang mukha ko.
Sa isang iglap ay tinapon ko ang litratong iyon. The printed picture flew away from me. I stared at it with anger in my eyes. Nanubig ang mata ko sa galit at halos habulin ng hininga. I couldn't crumple the paper so I threw it away from me. Because I know deep inside me, I couldn't even fire it even my wrath is seething with fire inside.
"What happened?" Cassandra rushed inside my room. "You might hurt yourself! Bakit ka bumangon?"
Tulala akong tumitig sa bintana. "Throw that away."
"Huh? Akala ko ba-"
"Sabi ko, itapon mo 'yan!" I glared at her. "Burn it or tear it down, I don't care! Just let that out of my sight!"
"You know this will not help.." iling iling niyang sabi habang pinupulot ang litratong nakahandusay sa sahig.
"I'm not trying to seek for help. I've been helpless my whole life, Cassandra." I gritted my teeth. "Throw that away. I'm begging you.."
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