s e v e n - easy for you to say

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let's just call it what it is,
letting go of all of t h i s . . .

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Growing up, I've always loved birthdays. Whether it be my own or someone else's, they were always something I looked forward too. They still are, honestly. I mark the special days on my calendar of the birthdays of my friends, family members, fellow employees and anyone else relatively important in my life, and count down until said day.

I love shopping for presents. I love when people open the gifts I got them. I live for the smile on their faces as everyone sings "Happy Birthday" and all they can do is sit there, soaking in the love around them.

As my seventeenth birthday crawled its way to me, I could hardly contain myself. For some reason, seventeen just sounds so much better than sixteen. It means I'm onto bigger things, like tackling my senior year of high school in the fall. Possibly with the chance to mature and take life problems by the throat.

I had a massive – and free – breakfast the morning of my birthday at none other than The Sand Dollar. The staff all sang to me, putting a candle on a chocolate chip muffin since we didn't have anything close to a cake. My friends and I hung out on the beach for most of the afternoon because the weather couldn't have been better, which is ironic because usually it rains on my birthday. But we soaked up the sun and the warm water, and also got a little crispy from being out for too long and not applying enough sunblock.

My parents, all my friends and I went out to dinner to celebrate later on in the night. Then we ended at my house, with an ice cream cake for dessert because it's my favorite. I opened the gifts from my friends, dropped off Noah and Caleb, and then looked forward to having a sleepover with Jodie and Sadie.

What I didn't look forward to was the talk that Jodie wanted to have with me.

"Don't mention any kind of food to me right now because I might explode," Sadie reprimanded, collapsing onto my bed with a dramatic groan. She rested her hands on her stomach, continuing to whine about how much she ate at dinner. The cake was another story.

I laughed, kicking off my flip flops and then taking a seat next to her. "It's still my birthday for another thirty-three minutes. No complaining," I commented. She just groaned even louder.

Jodie walked in my room last and shut the door behind her. She plunked herself down on my beanbag, a prolonged sigh leaving her lips as she directed her ultramarine gaze right at me. I immediately knew what it meant.

"So..." she trailed off at first, puffing her cheeks out in thought. "I know it's still technically your birthday, but we have to talk about this."

I moaned in aggravation as a reply, throwing myself dramatically back onto my mattress. "Do we really have to do this right now?" I mewled, covering my face with my hands.

"Yes," Jodie ordered. Sadie laying next to me just grunted as her answer, her eyes glazed over with gluttony.

"What do you want to talk about then?" I muttered the words, clearly aggrieved at this topic.

"I wanna talk about you and Brody."

My disdain for this talk slowly dissipated. That wasn't what I was expecting her to say – I thought Noah was going to be the subject. But knowing Jodie, we'll probably get to that soon.

I sat up now, leaning my back against the wall and folding my legs under myself. "What about him?" I said, wanting to seem a bit aloof.

"Well, we never really talked about what happened on Saturday," she shrugged with the same tone in her voice as mine.

After my confrontation with Jodie at Acacia's party, I went right back to talking with Brody, Peter and Aiden. I put what she said somewhere in a box in the back of my mind and sealed it shut, never wanting to open it again. From that night, we never talked about it – tomorrow it'll be a week since then. I really didn't talk about Brody with any of my friends yet, and I didn't even tell them about our random meetup on Tuesday.

For right now, I just wanted to bask in the feeling of having a new friend. Without my friends judging me and criticizing him.

"Like I said, I was just talking to him," I sighed. "He was the 'surfer boy' I told you about. And when I saw him at the party, I was a little drunk and thought I'd see if I could talk to him – then he kept talking to me and introduced me to his friends. It was a simple, friendly conversation." I paused to see my friends reactions, and saw Sadie hadn't changed while Jodie had an expression of indifference on her face. So I continued.

"I didn't tell you guys that the other day at work, I saw him. He came to the pier looking for the bathrooms and we ran into each other. Then he asked if I wanted to get something to eat, so we went to Kiko's. And after, we met up with his friends and hung out on the beach for a little while. Nothing happened, that was it," I explained it all for them and this time, they reacted like how I expected them to.

"Wait... what?" Jodie queried in uncertainty.

"Um, okay," Sadie perked up now, raising an eyebrow at me. "This guy obviously likes you."

I let out a low chuckle and shook my head, playing with the hem of my black romper. "Yeah, I doubt it," I mumbled, and Sadie shoved my shoulder in annoyance.

"It doesn't matter if he does. He's a sketchy guy," Jodie gave her input, making me roll my eyes.

"Here we go," I sang.

"Lena, I'm serious," Jodie affirmed and leaned up, her elbows on her knees. "You can't tell me you've never heard the things people say about him. Getting caught with drugs? Sleeping around with dozens of girls? Getting sent to juvie? I mean, he's practically a criminal."

"And what makes you say that? Because of some shitty rumor?" I spat in defense.

Before our bickering could get too heated, Sadie cut in. "Am I the only one who thinks this is a good thing?"

"Thank you, Sadie," I emphasized, sending Jodie a glare to which she scoffed at.

"But really, think about it," Sadie started on her thought. "It'll get Noah out of the way, and have him back off, you know?" I nodded vigorously in agreement, already liking where she was going with this. "Maybe once he sees you with another guy, friend or not, he'll get the message."

Of course, Jodie had to counter that. She breathed a ragged sigh, shaking her head. "Yeah, but you still have to tell him the truth. He can't go on without knowing how you really feel," she said to me.

"Ugh," I groaned, exaggerating my frustration as I rested my head in my hands. "I do have to tell him. I just don't want to do it."

"Get a little drunk, corner him, and spit it out," Jodie told me the plan, and all I did was nod in return. "This weekend. It's gonna happen – I'm making sure of that."

A weary sigh broke free through my lips at the thought of doing this. Not just saying I'm going to do it and then chickening out – actually taking Noah aside and telling him everything. Leaving nothing out and making sure he knows where I'm coming from. Undeniable dread filled in the trench that Noah's dug at the bottom of my stomach.

This is going to be one of the hardest things I'll ever have to do. But letting it go on forever is even worse than not saying anything at all.

Noah's P.O.V.

Caleb and I walked through the front door of our house right after Lena had dropped us off. It was noticeably quiet, meaning our parents had already gone to sleep. We both had the same idea of going to the kitchen and sitting at the table with a soda.

Sometimes being a twin is such a weird thing.

I cracked open my 7-Up and took a long gulp, putting it back down and staring at the can. Caleb's eyes were on me, but I fought the urge to look back at him.

I'm already pretty sure of what he's about to say to me. He knows me better than anybody, and he can practically see my thoughts right in front of him. Seconds later, I found out I was right.

"Dude," he breathed tiredly. I just let out a weak sigh as my response. He leaned back in the basic wooden chair as it squeaked underneath him, tilting his head to the side and not taking his eyes off me. "What's going on?"

"Too much," I muttered, staring blankly up at the ceiling.

"Come on. I thought you and Lena were gonna work things out?" He questioned. That's what I had planned to do.

I rolled my eyes at her name and tried to put off the cramping in my stomach as the result of eating too much food. Not the result of putting off telling a girl how much I love her.

Originally, I was going to come clean and tell her everything a long time ago. Like months before all this mess happened. It got to the point where a lecture from my intelligent twin brother was too much – he started to warn me about what could happen. And unfortunately, he wasn't completely wrong.

He sort of predicted that this would happen. Meaning both of us cleverly avoiding a talk that we desperately needed to have as soon as possible. Now, if we ever do decide to confront our issues, it's just going to be awkward and immensely uncomfortable. That's my fault for never bringing it up, but also her fault for doing the same thing.

We've weaved a tangled web that I'm not sure we're ever going to get out of. And it doesn't help that we've got excess company joining us.

"Now she's got Brody Lambert to fall in love with so why would she ever pick me over him?" I carped about him, attempting to erase the image of the two of them at Acacia's party, talking like they'd been friends for years.

"Noah, shut up. This is not some contest where she's gotta pick a winner at the end and marry them," Caleb retorted with annoyance obvious in his tone.

"Seems like it," I groused to myself in hopes that he would stop talking and leave me alone about this.

But it's Caleb, and he physically can't do that. He has to keep working at a problem until he fixes it. I guess that's why he wants to be an engineer.

He sputtered out a scoff, shaking his head. "If you don't want her with him, then you have to do something about it. You know what I'm saying?" He reprimanded, and I slowly nodded now as he leaned his elbows onto the table. "You gotta tell this girl how you really feel, or else she's never gonna know. Neither one of you are outspoken, so take charge and be the one who speaks up about this. Shit's only gonna get worse if you keep your mouth shut."

"Easy for you to say. You're not the one who has to do the talking," I said lowly, glancing up at him with a raised brow.

"I'll tell you what to say if you promise me you're gonna talk to her this weekend," he tapped assertively at the table with his index finger. I thought he was joking at first, but the look in his eyes told me he was dead serious. Nothing to be hidden in those brown pupils.

I laughed, a sound filled with tension and anxiety. The idea of actually having this talk with Lena made my blood pressure skyrocket. "Yeah, right. You really think that's going to happen?" I remarked sarcastically. He just glared at me for a second before he answered.

"Oh, I know it's gonna happen. I already got some things in mind," he gestured to his brain. If only he could do the talking for me.

With that confirmation from him, there was nothing else I had to say. I couldn't deny that he was right because we both know this talk with Lena and I is way overdue. Even Sadie and Jodie know that, but it's not like they tell me what they talk about when they get together with Lena. That's "girl code" and clearly, they're not going to go against that.

All I can use is the advice Caleb gives me, and the advice I give myself. By now, I'm not sure I have anything left to say to myself other than get-your-shit-together kind of tips. I have to man up and tell the girl that I love how I feel about her in a matter of a day or two. Easier said than done.

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A/N - as much as i love sticking to one pov, i couldn't help it with this story and i switch pov's quite a few times. i think it's cool to see things from someone else's eyes every now and then, idk. anyway, thoughts on how this talk between lena and noah is gonna go down? i'll tell ya that it won't go on without a hitch lol that's for sure.

not much else to say other than thanks for reading of course!!!! i love ya lots.

dedicated to: brightest_lightsΒ :)

song: walk away by ballyhoo!

photo: caleb (nat wolff)

xoxo, sabbbycat

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