CHAPTER 53: Hope Is Fickle, Death Is Not

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ADRIAN

My hands trembled as I signed the informed consent for dad's surgery. I instructed the doctors that I needed the best doctors at Mount Sinai to cater to him. I hadn't seen him yet, all I knew was that he had a car accident and they had directly taken him to the OT.

I walked across the room to look at Cecile, dad's driver's daughter.

"You alright?", I asked her.

She looked up at me, crying and just nodded my head.

"He is going to be okay.", I said, with little conviction. Shaun had taken most of the hit as the truck had hit the car head-on, at least that's what the bystanders told one of the paramedics at the site of the accident.

"Do you even believe your own words, right now?", asked the red-eyed, thirty-something lady.

"Whatever the medical expenses are, just send me the medical bills. I'll take care of it."

"Thank you.", she said, wiping her tears, "Now if you'll excuse me, I need to call my mother."

I nodded as she got up and walked out into the corridor. I needed to call my family too, I remembered. I felt for my phone in my coat pocket and fished it out. I searched for 'Mom' in the contacts but couldn't find it. Then I remembered that Mrs.Ludwig had just got me the phone today, so Mom's name was probably saved as something else.

I scrolled through the contacts and found her number under 'Mrs. Greys'. I was about to press call when I realised I couldn't do it. She wouldn't be able to handle the news, nor would my sisters. I would have sent Bryan home, to get them but I wasn't exactly in a position of asking favours from him, nor did I want to. I scrolled through the list desperately until my eyes locked onto a name:

Vanessa

But she lied to me. Should I even be calling her?

Desperate times called for desperate measures and right now I was more than just desperate, so I just swallowed my pride and hit the call button.

I heard the phone ringing and then a voice,"Hello?"

"Vanessa.", I said as calmly as possible.

"Adrian??? Is that you??", she asked.

"Yes...",I said but before I could tell her the purpose behind my call, I heard a familiar voice in the background. I frowned, "Your with your dad?"

"Yeah. I have this shareholders meeting."

"You picked up my call during a meeting?", I asked, disapprovingly.

"No. It hasn't started yet but it is going to. Anything urgent?"

I sighed, debating whether to ask her or not, "Nothing. Dialed by mistake."

"Then why didn't you cut it?"

"So that you don't keep calling me for the rest of the day.", I said. Being the boss of a company had definitely taught me how to cover up well.

"Are you okay??", she asked, her voice laced with concern.

"Yeah. Why do you ask?", I said, biting down on my cheek, preventing myself from giving away how I felt.

"You are having a normal conversation with me. Shouldn't you be mad at me for day before?"

How do I tell her, my world just got flipped upside down. There was so much to take in, so much to process that I couldn't even be angry. Hell, I didn't even know how to feel right now.

"I am angry at you but that doesn't mean I'm going to yell at you, on a call. I'd do that in person, instead."

She laughed,"Great. That's exactly what I picked up the call, to hear."

I heard her dad say," Vanessa keep down the phone."

"Ok. The meeting is starting. Should I call you later?"

"Ok.", I said, cutting the call.

I decided that I could tell mom later, when the surgery was done. It'd be better if she came to know that he was okay rather than wait through the entire surgery.

Dad had to be okay, there was no other option.

I sighed as I put my phone back into my pocket, being jerked back into the bitter reality. I tried to push away the various thoughts of what could happen as I buried my hot face into my freezing hands. I focused on my most vivid memory of him, the day we went to the cellar and had a hearty chat.

I felt so guilty now that I realised I wasn't even there at Christmas. How irresponsible could I be? I don't even remember how I got home last night.

I shook my head as I stared at the blank wall in front of me but not for long. The adjacent OT'S door opened and one of the doctors walked out. Shaun's wife who had just arrived a few minutes ago, asked, "How is he?"

The doctor replied, in a mechanical voice," I'm sorry ma'am. There wasn't much we could do..."

I didn't hear the rest. I couldn't.

But I saw Cecile sink to the floor as her mother began to wail, her hand over her mouth. I would tried comfort her but not now, not when my own father's life was hanging by a thread.

The panick suddenly kicked in and I realised that this could be my family. I picked up my phone and dialed Vanessa.

The phone rang but she didn't pick up. I tried again and again until five calls later, she finally lifted the call.

"This better be urgent because I left my meeting and dad is mad at me."

"Nessa. Something happened.", I said, my voice breaking, giving away how I felt.

"Adrian. Are you okay?"

"Could you get mom to Mount Sinai?", I said, ignoring her question.

"The hospital?", she whisper-yelled.

"Yes. I'm sitting right outside the OT."

"Oh my god! Adrian, what the hell is going on??"

"I'll tell you everything. Just get her here. And my sisters too."

"Alright. I'll be there in 30.", she said and I cut the call and began rethinking my entire relationship with dad.

Fuck.

I never listened to him. I had endless fights with him. I...I didn't even wish him merry Christmas this year. He was right, I didn't deserve the businessman of the year award, I didn't. He should have had a son like Blake, a man who would follow in his footsteps, who would take care of the family, who would be the perfect son.

On the other hand, I was far from perfect. I was the son he didn't deserve. I was the worst son ever.

I felt tears prick at the corners of my eyes but I blinked, hard and fast. Mom was going to be here and so would my sisters. Just in case something happened, they'd need me and that was why I had stay strong.

I was like a pillar. The moment I collapsed, the bridge would too and I couldn't let that happen.

I had to stay strong and so did dad. He had to get through this, I'd never forgive him if he left me like this, never.

"Adrian?", I heard a worried voice.

I looked at the door to see my family.

"Mom.", I sighed.

She started walking over to me but then stopped next to Shaun's family.

"Cecile? Linda?", she frowned, "What happened?"

"He didn't make it.", Shaun's wife said, holding back her tears.

"What happened to him?", Charlotte asked her.

Linda looked at me questioningly and then began telling Charlotte but I interrupted, "Mom. Come over here."

She did, "What's going on, Adrian?"

"Sit down. I'll tell you everything.", I said, as calmly as humanly possible.

When she did, I held her hands and sat down beside her, "Mom, Dad had a car accident this morning."

"Sorry! What???", Casey said, shocked.

"He's in the Operation Theatre.", I continued.

Charlotte cupped her hand over her mouth.

"What have the doctors said?", Casey asked.

"They haven't come out yet.", I replied.

"Okay, seriously...what the hell is going on?", Vanessa said, walking in.

She was dressed in a formal suit so I could only imagine how important the meeting she left was.

As Charlotte explained the situation to her, I looked at mom, whose eyes were tearing up.

"He's gonna be fine. He has to be.", I said, not sure which one of us I was trying to comfort with that.

"Shaun's dead, Adrian. I can only imagine how your father might be. I told Matthew, I felt something was wrong. I told him not to go out, I just didn't feel good but...he didn't listen.", she said, choking on her tears.

"Where was he going?", I asked.

Mom began to say something but held back, swallowing her words.

"Mom?", Casey asked.

"He didn't tell me.", she said, avoiding eye contact.

"Twenty six years with you, mommy. I'm sure you know by now that you can't lie to me. Just say it."

"He was going to the office.", she sighed.

"Our office?", I frowned.

She nodded.

"Why?"

"He must have had some work.", she lied again.

Was I too good at catching lies or was she too bad at lying?

"Mom, please don't lie. I don't get why you need to? It's me: Adrian. You can share anything with me."

"He asked your secretary to tell him when you reached the office...so that he could go talk to you, to settle things with Charlotte and to come back home."

I left her hands, "So all of this is because of me?"

"Adrian, It is not. Your. Fault.", Mom said authoritatively and repeated her statement again as I shook my head,"No no no. If I was there yesterday, none of this would have happened. None of this...", I said, anger flaring up inside me.

I left the room, storming out outside the hospital. Vanessa tried to follow me but I warned her, "Don't. Just don't!"

I went and sat inside my car, still processing what I heard and when the water went above my head, overwhelmed I hit the steering wheel repeatedly, cursing every abuse I knew and then fell back on the car seat, tired and defeated.

Damn it!

My father was here just because of me. Shaun was dead just because of me. I had killed a man. I was a murderer!

It was past sunset when I finally went in but the OT was empty. I asked the Receptionist for Matthew Greys and she gave me a room no. A wave of relief surged all over me.

He was okay. Dad was okay.

I went upstairs to the assigned room, outside of which Charlotte and Cassandra were sitting.

"Where's mom?", I asked Casey.

"She is speaking to the doctor.", she pointed to mom standing across the corridor.

I went to where she was and asked the doctor, how dad was doing.

"We ran a CT Scan and found out he had a haemorrhagic stroke. The surgery has prevented the exceeding and swelling but..."

Does there always have to be a but?

"...we have to wait for him to wake up. Only once the affect of anesthesia fades, we can find out if he had any neural damage."

"And when can he be discharged?", mom asked.

"I suggest it would be good if stayed for a minimum of ten days."

"Ten days?"

"Yes. We need to monitor his brain activity. Some effects of the haemorrhage may be latent and with his fractures, it'd be best if he stayed here."

I nodded as the doctor left to attend to some other patient.

"Adrian, where did you go?", mom said.

"I was sitting outside."

"Sweetheart, it's not your fault.", she said again.

"Then who else? Do I blame Charlotte and Bryan for ruining my mood or dad's dead driver, Shaun who is dead only because of me?"

"That is not true and why is there a need to blame someone?"

"I don't know. I just can't. How can something like this happen...to us?", I asked, trying hard to hold back tears.

"It's life. A lot of things can happen. Money can't buy a good future. If something is destined to happen, it will. And your dad is going to be fine, okay?"

I hugged her, pressing my head against hers, "I love you, mom."

"Oh my darling boy. I love you too.", she said, breaking the hug and reaching upto my face with one hand

Soon after, we decided it was getting late and we should go home while mom and me argued on who should stay with dad.

"I am his wife."

"Well, he didn't adopt me. I'm his son too.", I rolled my eyes.

"Come on. You have been here so long and it's better if you go home and rest."

"Mom, I pull off allnighters all the time. It would be easy for me to see if he needed something."

"Okay fine. But if anything happens, tell me. And I'll be coming here, first thing in the morning."

I nodded as my family left with Vanessa. I went inside dad's room and sat down on the sofa next to him. All his hair was gone, he had a collar around his neck and a cast on one of his hands. He was covered with a blanket so I couldn't see his other injuries, for which I was relieved.

I took out my phone and looked at the several missed calls from Bryan. Charlotte must have told him what happened. I sighed. I already had enough on my plate today, anymore and I don't know what I'd do so I just cleared my logs.

I checked my mails, looking back at dad, time and again but he was still unconscious. I remembered Shaun and instructed Mrs. Ludwig to transfer a million dollars into Shaun's salary account, though I knew not even that could make up for what Cecile and Linda had lost today.

I just realized how vulnerable we all were. Death comes to one and all, no matter how much that person has to himself or how revered that person is. Life is biased whereas death, it doesn't discriminate. In true sense, it is the biggest preacher of equality.

"Coffee?", a voice said, interrupting my thoughts.

I looked back at the brunette smiling at me, two coffee cups in a holder, in her hands.

"What are you doing here?", I widened my eyes.

"I came to see if you were okay and to give you company."

"You plan on staying here the entire night?", I asked dreadfully, though a small part of me hoped that she stayed on.

"Yes. And we can talk.", she smiled.

Maybe I could even ask her if she had come over to my penthouse yesterday...and the details of her visit.

I took the coffee from her as she sat next to me. This was us not many days ago, just our roles were reversed.

"Oh! I also got you a burger. Just you wait.", she said, fishing out a McChicken out of her bag.

"I'm not hungry, really."

"You haven't had anything all day. You better eat.", she said, shoving the wrapped burger in my face.

"Geez...fine.", I said, taking the burger from her hand.

I was eating when Vanessa's phone began to ring and she looked at the name on the screen.

"Shit. Oh god.", she gasped.

I would have asked what happened but once I saw the name, I couldn't care less.

"I...uh excuse me.", she said, walking out of the room.

I set the burger aside, irritated.

Seriously? She was talking to Blake right now too?

She returned a few minutes later with an apology, "Sorry. I had a date with him today and I stood him up."

"You told him what happened here?"

"Umm...ya."

"He could use it to his advantage, you know. Our situation."

"I know Blake is your rival but he isn't like that. He would never do what you are saying.", she said defensively.

"Then go share coffee with him. Why are you even here?"

"Adrian, please..."

"No. I am acting cordially and like none of this affects me but guess what Vanessa, it does. I hate Blake but I hate you more because even after being my...friend, you are dating him."

"Who I date won't affect you in anyway, so why does it even matter?"

"Because it just does. Now when I look at you, I don't see the girl who was my friend but the one who is dating my rival and who kissed him in my front porch.", I said, whisper yelling.

"The who?", she asked, shocked.

"I saw you both that day, when you returned back from your date."

"I...Oh-kay. If it means anything to you, I didn't kiss Blake."

"What?"

"Yes. I was going to but I didn't."

I felt a wave of relief wash over me.

"Why not?", I asked, curiously.

Could it have something to do with the reason I sent Elysa home?

I was tired that day...but not so tired.

"You have a problem with me kissing him, you have problem with me not kissing him, please figure out what you want, first.", she replied in exasperation.

"I want to know why you didn't kiss him."

"I'd be a happier person if I knew myself. Maybe I felt guilty about what happened between us or something else. I don't know.", She sighed.

I looked at her blankly as she said, "I apologise. Both for not telling you about Charlotte and Bryan and about dating Blake but...I am not sorry. I can't be. These were decisions I took fully knowing the consequences and I don't regret either of them. You can stay mad at me if you want to, I won't pester you. Just know that if you want to talk, I am right here. Always."

I looked away, not knowing what to say. I was angry at her, furious actually but still I don't know why I couldn't be fully mad at her, why I wanted to talk to her or to be around her.

"Well, I guess I better go. It's late.", she passed me a sad smile and turned around to leave but I caught her hand.

She looked at me questioningly and I just uttered one word,"Stay."

A/N: Hey guys,

Happy Holidays🎉🎊

This is officially the last update of the year. I can't believe we have come so far. This journey has been amazing with so many of you becoming a part of this family, living the story yourself, through Vanessa and Adrian's eyes. I won't say much as this chapter was very emotional already but I want to thank you all for everything.

Hope you liked the chapter. See you again in 2019.

Love you guys.😍





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