Please no complaints that this is short - my work schedule is crazy hectic this week, it's really late, I'm exhausted and I wrote this up in fifteen mins just to get something out. I'm going to stay up til midnight again to write the next one to get that posted as soon as I can ok so please no complaintssssss 🙏🏼🙏🏼🙏🏼

Cover by - TheBlackHole12 🖤

When the door of Dr Martin's office opens, the very door that I'll be entering soon, I don't pay any attention. It's when I hear his voice that my body jerks. I snap my head up, my heart launching into my throat.

I'm not sure what I'm more surprised about; the fact that Jake is here, at the same counsellor office, or the fact that is face is a complete and utter mess. And not the mess I caused; I mean. Tears streak his face and blotches of red cover his skin.

The air is magnetic around us, our stare charged with so much tension and chemistry that it feels way too intimate to have anyone else in the same room as us.

Dr Martin begins to talk. Both of our gazes are locked on each other. He absently shakes his head, tuning it to what she has to say. She gently touches his shoulder and my eyes widen.

Wow. He's talked to her. About us.

I'm pulling away from the wall before my mind catches up with my body. I'm out the door, gulping the fresh air, throwing my hands restlessly through my hair.

My mind is full and heavy. I'm so angry at Jake for what he did. I'm frustrated that he won't commit to me. I'm regretting my actions of hitting him. I'm confused about Rhett. I don't know what the hell I'm doing.

A warm hand touches my shoulder. My face is buried into my hands, my hot breath ragged and shallow. It's him. I could be upside down, blind folded, drugged and I would still recognise his touch. My body reacts to him subconsciously.

"I know," Jake says softly.

I pull my hands from my face. His eyes are a mess. They're glassy, wide and red-ringed. He's bruised and cut and discoloured. He's never looked sexier.

"You talked about us, didn't you?" I whisper.

"Yes."

"I'm surprised."

"Me too," he murmurs, dropping his hand.

I want to ask him what was said. I want to know every word exchanged. Did he confess what he truly feels to her? Did she get a look inside his mind, which I have been desperately trying to do myself? Did she get what I've been after delivered to her on a silver platter?

"You cried," I breathe. I reach out, dragging my finger across his cheek, capturing one remaining tear. My touch is so gentle compared to the angry hits yesterday. It's a blur, the whole ordeal. I really wish I had more self-control. Hitting him didn't achieve anything or make me feel better. It was a terrible decision and I knew that.

He reaches for my hand, curling his fingers around mine, tightly with a hint of his possessive nature. But also, soft and kind, too, his thumb caressing mine.

"I'm crazy about you, Cal. I'm trying to figure out how to deal with that."

I suck in a sharp breath. My head is swimming. So much is running through my mind. Our perfect day, our argument, our punch up, him mouthing he loves me. Images upon images slam into my mind, making me feel dizzy. Kissing, touching, breathing the same air. My mind is consumed with him.

"Yeah. You're dragging me along for the ride while you try to figure it out," I say softly, prying my hand from his and letting it drop to my side. "You know how I feel about you, J. You know what to do. You're just... confused. And that's okay."

"It's not okay to hurt you," he says quietly. "Or... that guy."

"Rhett."

"I don't care," he replies but he has a faint smile on his face. He knows his damn name. His smile fades as he looks to the ground. "I shouldn't have done what I did. But it drove me crazy thinking you were out with him."

"If you'd treated me better, that situation never would have happened," I tell him.

"Did you have a good time?" he finally meets my eyes, a desperate look settled in them. "With him?"

"I did," I answer truthfully.

"Did he kiss you?"

"I fear for his safety with this answer."

"Fuck," he exhales. "He kissed you."

"He did."

He closes his eyes and pinches the skin between his eyes, looking distraught. I uncomfortably shift my weight from one foot to the other. I feel like I need to apologise but really, I've done nothing wrong.

"Was it... Did it feel..." he stammers. I can see his mind spinning, trying to formulate a sentence.

"He's not you," I mumble, pulling my lower lip between my teeth and nibbling at it while I glare at the ground. "It's not the same."

"No one will ever be like I am to you, or you to me, Cal," he murmurs softly.

Goose bumps pierce my skin, making me bristle slightly. "That's what I'm afraid of."

He steps close to me. His hot breath fanning my face, my hand tremoring at his proximity. I gulp, looking away from him, unable to bear the thought of being this close and not touching. As though he feels the same, his finger curls around mine.

"Don't give up yet, Cal."

I sag into him suddenly. Our foreheads smack together. I bury my face into the warmth of his skin, seeking his comforting hold. I feel him choke on his breath as my hand is placed on his cheek, holding his face against mine.

I lightly kiss the corner is his mouth, which is split, from our fight.

Stepping back, the cold air swirls in front of me, harshly reminding me of our lack of contact.

"You need to figure some things out, J, and I can't be around while you do that," I say, feeling my heart splinter and bleed in my chest. "It's too hard."

The pain on his face is like a stab to the gut. He crumples, a pool of tears escaping down his face. My heart twists and I take another step back simply to stop myself from reaching out to him again.

God, this hurts. So damn much.

"Callum, please," his voice is pleading.

"You need some space to sort through things," I say quietly, running my hand over my face roughly, before walking past him. I reach the door to the building before turning back to him, my entire body shaking.

"Hey J?" I call out.

He pivots, facing me, his shoulders hunched, his hands limply hanging by his side. He looks defeated and it is gut-wrenching to witness.

"This isn't me giving up," I assure him. "This is me waiting for you," I say, before I slip inside the front door with a heavy heart and a face of salty tears.

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Is it weird that I feel the love between these two characters more than all my other novels combined? lmao. So crazy how this book has come to life and taken over. What do you think of what Jake is feeling and Callum's response?

Also, I fiddled with some settings and you should be able to search for a touch of sin's playlist on Spotify now, for those of you who had trouble finding it. Please enjoy and feel free to recommend songs that you think fit!

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