MY SISTER IS beautiful. She's got ass and boobs in that slim body of hers that can kill a guy. And I mean, literally, because Aaron keeps looking at her like he wants to undress her and stop her from going to work. Junior however, is more bothered about his toys, rather than the food Mrs. Kelly is trying to feed him.

"What do you think?" Liz asks, turning around, displaying the outline of her ass and giving me a sexy smile. And I mean, sexy.

"I think your husband wants to eat you alive," I state and Aaron looks at me with widen eyes, while he suppresses a turned-on laugh.

"Kim!" She almost yells, embarrassment flooding her cheeks. "Junior is right there, and we do not want to traumatize him!" She giggles. "He said his first word a couple of weeks ago,"

"He said Da-da," Aaron smiles.

"I heard him say Ma, yesterday," Liz continues. "I really can't believe it, he's going to be one soon and he's just so big,"

"I'm down for making another baby, you know," Aaron wraps his huge arms around her waist. He's also gotten more tattoos, because I swear to God, I can totally see more and more ink. "Maybe a girl this time, I wanna have another you,"

"Aaron we can't determine the sex of our baby while we're, you know," she giggles and I swear laughter erupts from me.

"You guys are too cute, it's starting to hurt," I grin at them and Aaron releases her, planting a small kiss on her forehead.

"You sure you wanna stay home alone?" Liz asks as she scoops Junior into her arms and hands him his favorite Thomas and friends toy. "You've never been one to stay home for even a day, you're always out and all,"

"That was mom's version of me, Liz, it's so sad that I don't even know my own version of me," I chuckle but it's almost a pained sound. Liz offers a small smile. "And I don't want to go back to my house, everything just reminds me of the facade of a person that I've been living for years," I say and she nods, and I carry Junior from her. "And I won't be alone, okay? I have Junior and Mrs. Kelly to keep me company," I grin and Junior smiles at me. His little teeth are slowly coming out.

"Alright then," she smiles. "Aaron will be back eventually, he insists on driving me to work before he heads to the gym to prep for the new season," She says, her eyes on her phone as Junior practically shoves his toy to my face. "Ba!" He yells, excitement flooding his little cheeks and a triumphant smile spreads across Liz's cheeks.

"I also need to go visit Bri, the whole new motherhood thing is freaking her out," she smiles. "So have fun, okay, Mrs. Kelly would get you anything you need and feel free to leave Junior on the floor to crawl around when your arms get tired," she says.

"Go ahead mama bear, we'll be fine," I assure her as she drops a kiss on Junior's cheeks and she says her goodbyes, along with Aaron.

And then it's just me, Junior and Mrs. Kelly.

"I'll hold him," she takes Junior from me. "You need to shower and eat something," she says, and it's not a suggestion, it's more like a motherly order. And I just obey.

I retreat to the guest room and I shut the door behind me. A couple of minutes pass and I find myself in the bathroom, staring at my slightly sad self in the mirror.

I miss him. I miss him so much that I want to cry about it. I know he's still in Milan, and I also know that my hands have been aching to text him and that whenever I try, I throw my phone away from me. It's not his fault, it's so not his fault, but that doesn't stop it from hurting so much.

I brush my teeth and then I sit in the bathtub. I don't know how long I sit, or how long I spend bathing, I just know that when I finally come out to the living room, Junior is fast asleep in his baby bed, his toys in his small hands.

"Took you approximately three hours," Mrs. Kelly smiles. "It's alright, we all have our moments," she says and I nod shyly. Liz tells me that she's like a Mom and a grandma to Junior and that she's literally the best, gave her all the advice she needed about motherhood and none of them failed.

I sit quietly and I find myself tuning to Netflix, looking for something to watch, anything to take my mind off the past.

"It's okay to feel, you know," Mrs Kelly says and I swallow for a moment. "It's okay, Kim, feel whatever you want to feel, anger, hurt, betrayal, love, it's perfectly okay," she smiles reassuringly.

"I have a small story to tell," she smiles sadly. "It doesn't really relate, I guess but it might help," she smiles and I nod silently for her to continue.

"When I was younger," she starts. "I was careless and I got pregnant, I was only nineteen at the time. The father was a guy that I hooked up with and you know guys like that, he didn't want the baby and honestly I couldn't hold it against him. My mom back then was a real bitch but when I got pregnant, everything changed and she was there for me, every step of the way. It's a long story that I don't want to get into but let's just say that whenever my mother wasn't home my father beat me up sometimes, said things about how I was a disgrace to the family and how my baby was a bastard, he also threatened to do terrible things to me if I told my mom, so I didn't, I couldn't, I was just so so scared," she sighs and my heart literally winces in pain. "My baby was a fighter, but she fought so hard until she couldn't fight anymore," she sniffles and I turn to look at her.

"A stillbirth," Mrs. Kelly chokes out and I gulp. "I was only nineteen at the time and maybe I wouldn't have been the best mother but losing her like that, it stung for years before I was able to open up to literally anyone,"

"How did you get past that?" I choke out and she smiles.

"I couldn't afford therapy, so my mom suggested something that really helped," she smiles and I look at her, a question silent in my eyes. "I wrote a letter to my baby, I wrote about everything that could have been and how much it hurt to see her go like that,"

"Wow," I gulp and she nods.

"Between losing a baby that you got to nurture in your womb and losing a baby you didn't know about, I honestly don't know which hurts the most," She says. "Now you can spend the rest of your life feeling bad about it, looking for someone to blame, and honestly, you might lose out on something really really good and worth living for," she expresses.

"Like Lee?" My voice wobbles.

"I've met him, he used to hang out here a lot when Junior was born for the first time, and I know him, I know how devastated he's feeling right now, I know how scared and excited he looked when he held Junior for the first time, and Junior was only three months old,"

"How did he look?" I can't help but ask. A visual of Lee holding a newborn shatters all my ovaries instantly, that's how far gone I am.

That's how much I'm in love with him.

"Very, very happy," she smiles confidently and I can't help the smile that spreads across my face.

"I just visualized that," I confess and she chuckles. "Do what you need to do okay?" She says and I nod. "And if you need to hand your parents their asses, I'm more than happy to be your wingwoman," she winks.

☽︎ ☽︎ ☽︎

I'M DOING IT. I'm writing a letter to my daughter. In the months after the miscarriage, I always imagined her as a girl, I honestly still do. So I'm doing it. I'm writing to her.

TO MY DAUGHTER

Dear Avery/Isabella/Madison(or whatever name I would have given you), Mommy's doing something crazy today, Mommy's writing a letter to you. I'm nervous baby girl, I honestly wish I had you, I honestly wish you stuck around longer for me to know that you were in there. Somedays I hate myself for not knowing, somedays I hate myself for not figuring out sooner because that cost me you. I imagine it a lot, you know. You would have had your Dad's grey eyes and his dirty blonde hair, you would have had my smile, because believe it or not, Mommy has a killer smile. You would have been the light to my dark, and you would have kept me company when you dad left. Now don't get me wrong, you dad loved me so much, and I know he still does, but back then, a lot of things stood in our way and they cost me you. God, I wish so many things right now. You would have been four years old, and maybe you would have loved drawing, or singing, or nothing. Maybe you wouldn't have any super talents and mommy would love you all the same. Maybe you'd just like to watch TV and eat so much, and Mommy would love you just like that, all your imperfections, all your flaws. And your dad, I know he'd have showered you with all the love in the whole world, and bet he'd have spoiled you so much, bought you everything you'd ever want or need. He'd have read spooky stories to you at night and enjoyed watching you hold on tight to him for comfort. He'd have been your hero, your knight in shining armor. But sadly, we didn't get that chance, and God it hurts so much to think about, it hurts so so much. But here's the silver lining; that Mommy and Daddy love you so so much, even though we didn't get to meet you.

With love,
Mommy.

I'm tearing up by the time I'm done writing and then I fold up the paper and place it in an envelope. And maybe Lee would love to see it, or maybe not, whatever feels right. I'm brought out of my daze by the sound of my phone ringing. The word Mother appears on the screen and I swear I almost throw my phone in the toilet.

A few beats pass and my phone stops ringing, it's then I hear a faint knock on the bathroom door. I open to see Mrs. Kelly with a sad and angry expression on her face and a crying Junior in her arms.

"We have a problem," she says and I scoop Junior into my arms as she walks with me back to the living room.

The problem however, is the two people I've come to loathe in the past couple of days.

Steve and Claire Summers.

My parents.

The first thing I do is hand a teary faced Junior back to Mrs. Kelly and then I silently tell her to take him upstairs.

"Come on, you won't at least let me meet my grandchild?" Mother seethes, a selfish grin on her face.

"Get out of here, Mom," I've practically just spat at her face.

"And you, why are you here, you are supposed to be in Zurich, acting, like a useful human being," She gazes me up and down.

That's it I've had enough.

"Get out of here before I call the cops on you, this is private property, and I don't care what you told the security that they let you in but you need to get out now,"

"Come on Kim, that's no way to talk to your parents," my dad finally speaks up and that's when I lose it.

"Says the man who manipulated my boyfriend," I seethe in anger.

"For your own benefit," he states, his stare unblinking.

"My own benefit?" I almost laugh. "Can you fucking hear yourself? Like are you fucking serious right now?" I yell. "You ruined my life, the both of you,"

"If this is about your baby, then I need to remind you that you never had her so whatever the hell you're feeling, you need to see a psychologist, or go to a mental ward, whatever works," a smile plasters on my face.

"Just stop talking,"

"Having that baby and that boyfriend wouldn't have done you any good, so we did the right thing for you honey and the least you can do is be grateful," Dad adds.

"Wow, just wow, how about this? I'm not going to be your fucking puppet anymore, and after the premiere of my movie, I'm fucking quitting!"

Silence blows like a strong hushed wind across the room. My mother pales, but recovers quickly.

"After everything we have given you—"

"Just fucking stop it right there, Dad," I say the last word with contempt. "Fucking stop it!" I yell. "I don't want anything to do with your manipulative conniving piece of shit lives and I need you to fucking leave my sister's house, I am warning you, I am not above grabbing a scissors from the kitchen and messing your faces with it, that's how fucking angry I am!" I yell and Dad flinches.

"Kimberly, you would do no such thing—"

"And now this is the part where you leave my house and never come back, or I would call the police," Aaron walks in, with Liz by his side.

"Aaron West—" Dad starts but Aaron beats him to it.

"I'm the Captain of the Seattle Kraken, the police believe everything I say, now get out of my house," Aaron states calmy.

And just like that, they leave, without a glance at me and a small feeling of liberation courses through my veins.

I feel free.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A/N

I'm sobbing y'all, that letter is just.....

Who loves the bonding between Mrs. Kelly and Kim?

JUNIOR SAID HIS FIRST WORD!!

And yes, the Summers' are finally free from their parents' grip, let's boo at them together!!!

Four chapters and an epilogue to go before A Burn Like This is released! Who's sad and excited at the same time?!