Reminiscing

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Spencer's POV

I lean my head back to rest on the back of the couch. What is it about this guy? In one five-minute conversation I'm suddenly baring my soul to him. He makes me feel comfortable. I'm at ease with him. Not only that, but my body seems to light up whenever he is around. I don't even bat an eye when he sits on the couch next to me. I almost have to keep my body from leaning in towards him.

"You look tired." Captain obvious over here. I send a weak glare to him before rolling my eyes.

"You would be too if you hadn't had a day off in over three years." I laugh halfheartedly. He looked at me with concern shining in his eyes. I didn't miss how he shifted towards me slightly. "I've had this dream of running my own farm ever since I was a child. I finally got the chance to make it happen. I had only started a few months before Jay came into my life." I shake my head slightly as I stare up at the ceiling. "It was a lot you know. I was running on like 3 hours of sleep per day and didn't have anyone to help me run the farm. I had thankfully found a babysitter, but she moved a few months after starting. In those few months I was able to at least get my feet off the ground and learn a routine for the animals that worked. But I couldn't find a babysitter or daycare that would accept him for the hours that were needed. Sucks living out in nowhere-Ville. I looked into ranch hands but couldn't really afford it. All my money has been spent to cover the land and house as well as operating costs. I have a small cushion for emergencies but nothing I could really use as a salary." My eyes glaze over as I reminisce on the last few years. While I'm glad I was able to start my farm, I don't like how I was able to.

I miss my family.

A hammering of footsteps running down the stairs knocked me out of my memories. Jay comes running towards us dressed in his Superman shirt and shorts and his trusty cape around his neck.

"Momma. I'm saving the day!" He beams at me excitedly. I can hear Nick chuckling next to me. He leans towards me to whisper in my ear. I can feel my heart rate accelerate just by his proximity.

"He's too cute for his own good." I laugh and nod. Oh, he has no idea.

"You want lunch bud?" Jay nods emphatically at me and runs into the kitchen, making sure to swish his cape behind him.

Nick stands up and turns towards me, offering his hand. I curse inwardly at my body's immediate reaction of blushing, but softly lay my hand in his. The warmth from his touch sparked from my fingertips and traveled down to my core. How can a simple touch from this man make my body react like that? This is insane. Even with my ex, who I thought I loved, I never had this reaction. Like my body craves Nick's touch alone. He firmly tugged me upwards and started walking to where an impatient Jay was waiting. When we reached the kitchen, he reluctantly let go of my hand.

"What do you want for lunch buddy?" Jay bounced excitedly on his toes as he screeched his reply.

"Ants on a log! Ants on a log!" Nick glanced at me in confusion and I had to laugh.

"It's not real ants. Just raisins sprinkled on peanut butter that is spread on celery. Apparently when boys think it's cool to eat bugs, they will eat whatever." I murmur towards him so that Jay wouldn't hear.

"Ah. That's a cool idea." Nick watched me intently as I moved throughout the kitchen to prepare Jay's lunch.

Christ. I'm going to need a cold shower if he keeps this up.

I kept my gaze averted from his, knowing that if I looked my body would do something else hugely embarrassing.

"Nick, any requests on lunch?" I could have sworn I heard him murmur "you" under his breath. But that had to have been my imagination.

I wouldn't mind.

I quickly shake free of my lustful thoughts before I could let my imagination run completely off the rails.

After lunch, Nick insisted he clean up since I cooked. It seemed oddly domestic, me watching him wash our dishes as Jay starts yawning from weariness.

"Time for your nap baby." I kiss the top of his head. Nick finished drying the last dish and walked towards me. Before I could utter a word, he lifts Jay off my lap and into his arms. Jayden nuzzles into his neck and drifts off as Nick walks him to his room with me following behind, pointing the way. I watch from the doorway as Nick gently places Jay onto the bed. He slips off his cape and then tucks him under the covers, gently brushing his bangs back.

Nick turns around to catch me staring intently at him. His ears tinge red as he rubs his neck awkwardly. "Sorry. I didn't mean to overstep."

I smile softly and shake my head. "Don't apologize. I'm just a little surprised is all." I walk past him to kiss my boy's forehead. Hopefully, I can get some more chores done now that he's asleep. I had no choice but to bring him earlier.

Nick and I ventured back downstairs and sat back on the couch with a slightly awkward silence spreading between us. Nick was the first to break it as he looked towards me with curiosity gleaming in his eyes.

"Why were you so surprised up there? Do I look like the type who doesn't like kids or something?" I bite my lip wondering how to reply.

"I don't know." I mumble. "I've never had Jay take to someone so quickly like he has to you. It was a little weird seeing you care for him like he was your own when you barely know him. Don't get me wrong it's adorable it's just......" I trail off not knowing if I want to get into this subject. My teeth catch my bottom lip as I gnaw on it in worry.

Warmth envelopes my hand. I look down to see Nick lacing his fingers with mine. My stomach tightens as he squeezes my hand, bringing my gaze up to his worried one.

"It's just what?" His voice was soft and warm. Trying to coax out my worries and insecurities. I take a deep breath before exhaling slowly in a sigh. I turn my body more towards Nick so I could be facing him. I try and pull my hand back, but his grip simply tightens. His thumb begins to rub across my knuckles.

"I was in a relationship." I can feel Nick tense up from my words. His finger that was moving across my skin momentarily halts. "Before Jay, before buying the farm. I met him in high school, and we were together for three years." I close my eyes briefly. I'm so over that asshole but it still can be painful to remember how he left. A large, warm hand cups my chin and raises my face. I open my eyes to Nick's glorious blue orbs. His thumb skims my jaw softly caressing it. I sigh softly and turn my face into his touch. He smiles briefly at this. He's being so patient and caring. I could live in this moment forever. It still catches me at how odd but normal this feels.

"You don't have to continue if you don't want to." He says that. But I know he wants to know. His actions have been pretty clear even though I don't understand how he can like someone like me. It's pretty obvious he wants something more here.

"It's fine." I organize my thoughts as Nick drops his hand from my face and laces our fingers together again. It brings me a comfort I didn't know I needed.

"Looking back, I don't know how I didn't see it. He always said he wanted to get married and start a family and all that." I smile ruefully towards Nick. "He was never the romantic type. I should have seen through him, but I was caught up in wanting to love him. Looking back, especially now, I'm not even sure I really did. I think I was just comfortable and scared of being alone." Nick looks at me with interest. A slight smirk resting on his face.

"Especially now?" I flush after realizing what I said.

"Uh. You know. Just.... that I've had enough time to look back on it." I lie. He doesn't need the ego boost. Knowing that in the span of one day after meeting him I'm feeling more than I ever have before at a simple touch or look.

"Ah." That stupid smirk would not leave his face.

I roll my eyes. "Anyway, Jayden came home to stay, and he became cold and distant. I went to his apartment to grab something I had left and found him in bed with some chick." I huff out a laugh, shaking my head. "He said he never wanted to raise a child that wasn't his. Didn't even bothering talking with me or breaking it off. He just goes out and finds the first girl he can lay." The sadness in Nick's eyes was quickly replaced anger. A fury I couldn't quite recognize. His eyes turned a dark blue as he clenched his teeth.

"How could he do something like that? He's a fucking idiot." He grumbled out before immediately shooting me an apologetic look. "Sorry. I shouldn't have said that."

"Eh. It's pretty accurate." I laugh. Nick's expression softens. "Anyway, I guess I was just surprised that you stepped right in. I was with the guy for three years and he high tailed it as fast as he could as soon as he met Jay. But you?" I shook my head in almost disbelief. "You took him on in like two seconds flat. And he surprised me by being just as attached."

Nick looks at me curiously. "Both my parents say that Jay doesn't warm up quickly. Can I ask why?" His eyebrows scrunch together.

"I don't know for sure, but I'm assuming it's because he's not around men. It's just been the two of us or occasionally your mom and dad to watch him. Your dad was really the first man he ever met, and he took forever to warm up to him."

"No other men?" Nick's eyebrows shot up in surprise. I turned to face him with one brow lifted.

Well, that was certainly subtle. I mentally rolled my eyes.

"I don't exactly have the time to date. And Jay will always come first. Your sister pushed me to go out on a few dates, but they didn't progress to anything. As soon as I said I had a kid, they lost interest."

"I don't know how that's possible." Nick mumbled shaking his head as his eyes raked over me.

I glanced at the clock on the wall. We had been talking for a little over an hour. Jay will hopefully sleep for another two hours.

"We should go deal with the hay. I still have some more chores to do before the nightly rounds." Nick stood up and again offered me his hand. He pulled me to my feet quickly, causing me to stumble into his chest. He wrapped his arms around me to steady me.

"Falling for me already I see." He smirked down at me. My cheeks were burning as I pulled back from him. He smiled at my obvious discomfort.

"Sorry. Um...let me just go turn on the baby monitor and I'll be right there." I scramble away towards Jay's room. How does he have this much control over my body!

Get it together!

Ugh. This is going to be a long afternoon.

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