Chapter 4 | Loss(t)

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So a few people have asked to be reminded who a few of the characters are, an understandable ask seeing how this book has been going on for so long and I do tend to introduce quite a few people. 


1. AISLING (AS.LING.): Wife of Hobbson, Aisling is a Water Sprite/Siren and the Queen confidant and close friend. Aisling was the one who had Obsidian arrested on his arrival to the Water Kingdom and his ship searched for the egg on the basis of a tip that it was hidden there. She was the choice pick for the person who had framed him - but her innocence was proven when Aranel owned up to that particular bit of evilness. Her motives towards approaching Katarina at the end of Chapter 3, Part 1 are unknown at the moment, but Aisling is a complex character so don't judge her too quickly ;)

2. KATARINA (KAT.A.RE.NA): She is the soulmate to Ambrose, (Soulmates in the Water Sprite terms are a little different to the Human understanding of the word, basically they were paired together from a young age.) She chose to break this pairing when she deserted him and under, (what we now know to be Aranels instruction,) made off to the Air Kingdom, where she attempted to make Zalas fall in love with her, which of course didn't work. So working with Aranel again, she went back to the Water Kingdom to try to win back Ambrose so as to have some power in a high place, which we has just learnt, hasn't worked either. 

3. AMYARILLIS (AM.A.RIL.ISS.) is Circe's good friend, she comes from the Water Kingdom and is 1/2 Siren and 1/2 Water Sprite. She and Cobalt have developed a 'thing,' which I think is kinda cute ;) 

So there you have it guys! If anyone needs another character update let me know :) Hope you all enjoy the chapter, I know you have been waiting a long time.

Love Daisy xox

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CIRCE


Two days before Ambrose's departure from the Water Kingdom.


I was unsure when the urge hit me. The desire to find land, the kind of desire that twists deep in your gut, quickens your breathing and leaves your heart in your throat.

I was deep under water at the time, and for a moment it felt as though there was someone ... something floating behind me with a finger reached out, ready to touch my bare skin. I had swirled around but there was no one there and I was left looking out into the vast, empty, ocean with chills running down my spine and a sudden feeling of claustrophobia etched into my mind.

Using my Siren instincts, instincts which I had grown more and more familiar with as time had passed, I was able to figure out the direction of the closest land and with the eerie feeling chasing me on, I set out for it straight away.

*

Two days of swimming put land in sight and still the urge had not left me. The waters were warm here and the underwater ocean life, although delightful and once would have had me enticed me to explore, held no interest for me now. I assessed the land quickly, with the air of one who has become an expert at survival, paying no attention to the brightly coloured aquatic life flitting below me.

It appeared that I had found, not an island, but a mainland. The shore line stretched out far on either side of me and the vegetation was thick and green. The land was choppy, it rose and it fell and I spotted the mouth of a slow moving river off to the right. Swimming towards it, I stayed low in the water. This area was an ideal location for a human township; my instincts told me that there would be one somewhere.

I continued swimming around, following the coastline and eventually I found it, although it was almost night time by the time that I did. It was barely a town, seemingly to be in a similar state to the one that I had found upon first arriving at the Earth Kingdom. Houses rose up from between the trees and a long pier stuck out from the middle of the cove, home to a few small fishing boats. I had to wait until the Sun had completely set before I saw any sign of life at all, and even then it was only the lights in a scattering of windows that gave away human presence.

I silently approached under the cover of darkness, swimming to hide under the slat boards of the pier as I made my way closer and closer to shore. I drew in a sharp breath as I heard someone walking past. Peeping out I recognised the figure to be distinctly male. I shook my head, I had to be careful about who I approached, I needed clothes, I needed safety.

Luck must have been smiling down on me for it wasn't ten minutes later than I heard the sound of slightly softer footsteps running across the sand. The shape was smaller this time, a child, running towards the water. Changing form was almost painful and I let out a soft cry as my Siren flesh peeled away and shrunk back into my skin, leaving me with two human legs. I adjusted quickly to the feeling of moving them through the water as two halves instead of one whole.

"Who is there?"

The voice was sweet and young, definitely a child, a little girl by the sound of it. She had paused at the water's edge and as I came out slowly from under the pier, she spotted me and her small frame swayed back and forth for a moment as though she couldn't decide whether or not to run.

"Please." I croaked out, coughing as I tried again, my voice rusty from lack of use. "Please, don't be afraid."

"Who are you?" The girl demanded. Her curiosity had gotten the better of her and she came forward a little. In the moonlight I could see that she clutched a small pail in her hand.

"My name is Circe," I said cautiously. "What is yours?"

"I'm Alice." She stated. "Why are you swimming?"

I took a breath. "I'm not actually, I have lost my clothes. Do you think that your Mummy has any that she could lend me?"

"My Mummy is dead," Alice said casually. "But my Daddy can help you; I will go and get him." She put down her pail and turned and ran off, leaving my outstretched hand reaching out after her.

"No, wait-"

Cursing, I turned back, making for the safety of the pier and hid myself in the darkness. It wasn't long before I heard Alice returned, followed by the heavier footfalls of her Father.

"Over here Daddy."

"Alice sweetie, I told you that you could be down here for a minute to fetch more water for Frank. You know you aren't supposed to talk to strangers."

"But Daddy, she needs help." I heard the little girl insist.

I peeped out and saw Father and daughter pause by the water. "Well then, where is she?" He asked.

"I don't know." Alice sounded confused.

"Sweetie, are you sure there was someone there?"

"Yes! Her name is Circe."

"Darling, I think it's time for bed-"

"No Daddy, maybe she is just shy! You should leave the clothes here."

I watched as, at his daughter's insistence, the man bent down, leaving a pile of cloth in the sand. He then picked up his daughter and her pail and they turned to head back up the beach.

I waited till they had disappeared into the treeline before, mustering all of my courage; I dashed out of the water, grabbed the clothes and pulled them on. To my surprise I found myself wearing a rather lovely day dress, simple, but suitable. Once I might have even thought myself pretty in it, but now the burns covering my hands and my arms reminded me that I was far from that. I hadn't been able to bring myself to heal them away though, to do so would be like pretending that it had never happened. To do so would be like pretending that I had never reached out to save him, like I had done nothing. They had healed in their own time, but had left me with skin that was stretched tight across my bones and lashed with shiny red and pink blotches.

I reached up and subconsciously touched my hair. The half that had been burnt away was beginning to grow back, but the difference in length was still painfully obvious and reminded me just how long it had been since I had had to think about appearances.

I sat down on the shore for a moment, my legs trembling, unused to standing on land, and looked out to sea. The gut wrenching urge was gone now and I now realised that it was logic talking to me, reminding me that if I had stayed in the shelter of the ocean, they would have eventually found me

I closed my eyes, feeling suddenly shaky. For the past couple of days I had been focusing on my survival, but being back on land ... It was like ... It was just ...

I swallowed but it didn't stop my lips from trembling. He was dead. I would never see him again, never hear his voice and never feel his touch. All of these things, I just couldn't move past them. It was like he stood in front of me, blocking my way forward. But the problem was that I didn't want to move forward, I just wanted to stay there and look at him forever.

"So you are real."

I gasped in shock, jumping to my feet faster than I thought possible. In response the figure held out his hands in gesture of surrender.

"Woah! Easy there, I don't mean any harm, I'm Alice's Father, the little girl from before?"

I placed a hand over my beating heart, willing for it to slow down as I choked out an apology.

"No need to apologise, it was my fault completely."

There was an awkward pause and then he held out his hand. "I'm Arthur."

Instinctively I reached out to return the gesture and too late realised that my burns would raise more questions than were good. I recoiled, my hand dropping back to my side, but to my surprise he didn't question it. Instead, his hand moved up to run through his hair as he looked back towards his house.

"Look," He began, "I don't really feel okay with the idea of leaving you here now that I know you aren't a figment of my daughters imagination, can I offer you a room for the night? We have a spare one actually."

I halted, but in my heart I couldn't refuse him. I glanced around and shivered once before nodding my head. "I would be very grateful," I whispered.

"Great," He said, starting out towards the treeline. "Come on, this way then."

It didn't take long to reach his house; it was nestled in the jungle, just out of sight of the beach. I noticed a few other lights shining through the foliage, and even the chattering of voices somewhere off to the left.

"Our village isn't very big now I am afraid," Arthur said as we walked. "We were subject to a horrible disease just under a year ago, it took a lot of lives and kept us isolated for the length of its duration, for fear of it spreading you see. We used to be a busy little fishing town, but now, well we are just trying to survive. A few townsmen set out for the big city, but we haven't seen them since."

I remembered Alice's remark about her Mother being dead and I wondered if that had been how she had died, but I couldn't bring myself to ask.

"Here we are."

The house was cute, made completely from wood, it almost seemed to be a part of the jungle. I saw a little face peeping out of the window from around the edge of the curtain but as soon as she spotted us, the curtain fell back into place.

Arthur smiled ruefully. "She is supposed to be asleep." He opened the door for me and smiling in thanks, I stepped inside.

Nostalgia, that's what hit me first. If it wasn't for the fact that the ground wasn't moving beneath me, I would have thought I was back on the ship. The little cabin was neat and tidy, with the kitchen and living area tucked into the same room. There were three doors, one, he told me, lead off to the bathroom and the other two were bedrooms. Alice, he said, slept with him.

"Would you like anything to eat?"

I turned around to take in his appearance in the lamp light, the first time I had seen him properly since I had met him. He was quite large and his skin was tanned from the sun, a working man, no doubt a fisherman. His hair was dark though, a deep chocolate brown, but his eyes shone as blue as a cloudless sky. He had laughter lines around his eyes and his mouth and his jaw was strong, although it was covered with a beard. Other than that, he did not seem very old at all, certainly not as old as my Father.

Realising that he was still waiting for an answer I declined the offer politely. "No, thank-you though."

He showed me to my room, lighting the lamp for me before softly closing the door and leaving me to my thoughts.

*

I awoke in the early hours of the morning, a silent scream resting on my lips. My arm flung out to touch the other side of the bed as I stared straight ahead, wishing, wishing for a moment that my fingers would touch something other than cold sheets.

I was disappointed.

I pushed down the lump in my throat and ran a hand through my hair, swinging my legs over the side of the bed and inhaling as my toes made contact with the cold floorboards. I rose, pulling the covers with me and wandering over to the window, pushing back the curtains and peering outside.

How strange to be back in a house after all this time, I thought as my breath fogged up the glass in the window pane. I wiped away the mist before turning and venturing out into the living room.

To my surprise, I was not the only awake at this hour. Arthur sat on the couch, reading from a tattered book. He started as I came in and I smiled in apology.

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to disturb you, I just-"

He half rose from where he sat and held out a hand. "No please, don't worry about it. Please, sit."

I did ask he asked and went to sit on a pretty armchair that was positioned near the window but at his sharp intake of breath I stopped, looking up to see his gaze pained as he watched me.

I flushed and stepped away, I should have realised. "I am sorry, I'll sit somewhere else."

He had opened his mouth as though to protest, but no words came out and his gaze stayed fixed on the chair, as though he couldn't bear to argue with me. I moved to sit on the end of the couch beside him and stayed silent, giving him a moment to recollect his thoughts.

"I am sorry." He said finally.

"Don't be." I was surprised to find that my voice was rough with emotion. "Don't be sorry."

We couldn't seem to look at each other, but finally he broke the silence and asked if I would like something to drink. I confessed that I would and he hurried into the kitchen to make tea, his movements quiet, no doubt aware of his daughter, asleep in the next room.

My gaze drifted back over to the arm chair and I wondered what she had been like, what memories he had of her in it that made it so hard for him to let go of. Was it the way she had laughed while sitting there? Perhaps at something he had said, or because of a witty paragraph in the book she had been reading at the time? Maybe she had nursed their child there, and he had looked on from his seat on the couch, at his pretty little family, so beautiful, so perfect. Arthur seemed like a man of few words and in my mind I imagined her completing him. She would have been beautiful, with an outrageous laugh and sparkling eyes. I wondered how much he saw of her in his daughter.

A tear slipped from my eye and I wiped it away as I felt his weight return to the couch. I turned to him and accepted the cup gratefully, trying to steady my hands, lest the saucer should rattle and give me away.

Thankfully I noticed something that I could change the subject to, without fear of stirring too many emotions.

I pointed at the little red pail that stills at by the door. "I heard you say yesterday that Alice had been fetching water for Frank, who is Frank?"

Arthur chuckled, a deep bass sound that was warm and inviting. "Frank is over there." He pointed over to the corner and to my absolute shock I saw a rather large aquarium standing in the corner. I didn't know how I hadn't noticed it before and I wondered how they had gotten a hold of it, aquariums were rather hard to come by, back at my human home, my Father had had one, but it was kept in his study and I hardly ever saw it.

"Where-ever did you get it?" I asked, wandering over to it, I was intrigued and pleased to see, with my critical eye, that it was beautifully established with corals growing in it as well as a variety of underwater plants. Arthur must really know his trade, more than was normal.

"There is an abandoned estate, higher up the hill. The family moved out you see, when the disease started spreading. They were in charge of the town, but their little girl was delicate, they couldn't risk staying. They left right at the beginning and I don't think they ever planned on returning. Their house fell into ruin and well, we took some things from it."

I turned to look at him and he shrugged. "The medicine in their cabinets helped to put some of our dying to rest." His eyes became slightly unfocused. "They were good people, we didn't destroy the home, on the contrary, that house is probably the only reason we managed to survive. They left everything you see, their food, medicine, linen, we took what we needed."

I couldn't argue with that and I wasn't going to. I turned back to the tank, searching for its inhabitant as he continued talking.

"I found the aquarium on my second trip up there; only a few months back actually, all of the fish had died of course because no one had noticed it before I had. I cleaned it out and brought it back here for Alice. We found Frank by accident, Alice was looking in the rock pools around the coast, there is a special spot that we go to where I can catch good fish. She insisted that we bring him home."

I finally spotted 'Frank,' he had been hiding on the coral, but he chose at that moment, to blink his eyes and reveal himself, his tentacles curling up in the cutest fashion as he studied me.

"Octopus are actually quite intelligent you know. He makes the most delightful pet, although he will have to go back to the ocean one day, when he gets too big for the tank."

"Whatever does he eat?" I asked, fascinated as the little octopus swam over to greet me, sticking his little suckers to the glass.

"Small fish, shrimp, crabs and whatever else I can catch for him really. Alice loves him."

I smiled at him. "I bet she does." I said softly. "Hey, I don't suppose you could help me with something?"

*

I ran my hands through my newly short hair and looked at myself in the mirror. Arthur's steady hands helped the razor shed away the last of my hair, the smooth blade cutting through the golden curls with ease. They fell to the floor in soft piles, tickling my feet.

"It feels different."

"Better different?"

"Definitely," I said, touching my head again. He had done a good job, it was all even now and shorter than I had ever had it in my life, shorter even than Arthurs. I didn't mind though, at least I now looked semi normal.

Except for those burns. I caught Arthur looking at them again and for a moment I caught his eye before he glanced away.

"Right, all done now!"

"Thank you," I said softly.

He raised his head and we looked at each other through the mirror. There was some sort of understanding there, an understanding forged through loss and what had been lost on the journey towards recovery. His words were warm and his mouth lifted up in a small smile.

"You are welcome."

*


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