Nandini POV

I was lost in my past life sitting on the floor in a corner of my dark room. Tears uncontrollably flowing from my eyes and an immense pain suddenly started to grow in my heart which is getting unbearable with every thought of my past life and daima's venomous words. I am feeling like as if I accused for the same for what my mother has been through. I feel like I too accused for being someone's home wrecker without any fault exactly like my mother eleven years ago.

I am feeling saffocated my breathing suddenly started to increase , panic came the best to me. I don't know where to go what to do to decrease my growing pain. I  am feeling like I have no control on myself. My head is hammering with my past and present incidents. Daima and Yashudha's maasi words are blaring like a disaster in my head , my brain nerves are bulging creating a massive rupture in my head.

"Ahhhh!!!"I cried in pain pressuring my head with my hands almost pulling my hairs from scalp. My face is all wet with continuous hot tears.

I lost myself in my unbearable     pain and started to throw everything just to avoid that accusing women sounds from my head. So that my head ache would decrease but nothing happened. There grew more panic and pain in my heart and head.

Please shut up!!!!

I wanted to shout but my voice betraying me no words forming in my mouth. My throat getting dry. I want to shut their stupid mouth but it keep on increasing. I took a pillow and covered my ears but still that voice keep on growing. My eyes snapped open and fell on the mirror where I saw Daima and Yashudha aunty accusing me and my mom's character. When there shits again started to get unbearably increase, I took the vase from bed side and threw on the mirror and it got shattered. When I felt voices aren't blaring mire I sighed and contracted my body. But after few mins of silence. I again saw some random women behind the glass window of my room accusing me again. I quickly got up and rushed to drag the curtain without caring that I actually walked on broken glass pieces. My inner pain was so painful that I never felt the pain on my skin. I sat back there leaning on the wall again but voices aren't ready to decrease and my heart and headache keep on increasing. I wiped my sniffing nose and eyes with back of my palms harshly which was bluring my vision. My eyes fell on broken glass pieces and I quickly grabbed it and watched it studiously. After that I slowly took it and started to scratch my wrist brutally with it without caring how much blood I am loosing just to distract my inner pain. My wrists now started to look awful. But atleast it decreases my pain a little. My vision started to blur and I felt black spots infront of my eyes and my eyes drooping slowly. I smiled a lazy smile before collapsing on the bloody floor last I heard was hard knocks on my door.

Manik POV

I rushed from the hall to Nandini. I reached her door to find it locked. I got worried and slightly knocked on the door didn't want to disturb her but suddenly I heard the sound of shattering and breaking something. I got more worried and started to bang door hard after few mins Abhi too joined me and he too came hearing the same shattering breaking sound and slowly everyone gathered around there looking worried. We banged so hard but there was no response and my patience level broke.

"Guddi!!bring the spare keys of this room..FAST!!" I shouted for one of my servants and she without any delay came running with the key before handling me.

I put the key in keyhole , door get open after click sound. I banged open the door only to met with darkness nothing else. A little sunlight coming from the closed window glass with dragged curtain  which was illuminating the room very little only to leave the thing almost on our assumptions. I walk inside slowly and felt my something like glass and some other solid pieces crunching beneath my food and I got more worried. I finally found the switch and open it we all gasped in shock:the room was a mess more than we imagined. Everything was completely broken nothing was on place but still there was no sign of Nandini not even voice. We all started to look here in there in room and after reaching on other side of the bed. I gasped in shock and my body started to trembling in fear. After noticing my shock trembling face everyone gathered around me and they have the same look.

There was Nandini curling like a ball lying in the pool of blood in a corner, her whole wrists was scratched brutally till her elbow and her sole was also covered in blood with shiny tiny pieces slink in her sole;may be it was a glass pieces.

What the hell happened here!!!!

I was the first to finally recovered from the shock and rushed to her body. I can't explain how I was feeling seeing her like this. My whole body was still trembling terribly and sweat beads were forming on my head.I quickly gathered her body in my arms and lied her on the bed checking her wrist.

"Uncle Brij!!call the doctor..Now!!" I yelled in panic while wrapping Nandini's arms with my hanker chief to control her bleeding.

After listening my panic voice they recovered from shock uncle brij nodded and others gathered around Nandini. Abhi was the first to come to her. He sat beside her taking her head in his lap.

"Nan..Nandini..open your eyes baby girl!!"he stated worriedly patting her cheeks while Mukti , Navya and alya started to wrap clothes around her other bleeding parts.

"What actually happened here??"Mukti asked with tears.

"She was normal and calm when she left from there"mahar spoke confused and she too has tears while Abeer was consoling her taking her in his hug.

"If anything happen to her na, I will destroy you. So just pray for her."abhi stated angrily gritting his teeth looking towards daima. Who was standing in a corner quietly looking shocked and tormented.

__________

After 15 minutes doctor reached here and now checking Nandini. We shifted her in another room. We all are standing silently looking devastated while Abhi was the one sitting beside her.

"What happen to her doctor is she ok??"I asked quickly when I saw doctor keeping her stethoscope back.

"Yeah!! And is she really tried cto suicide??"we all snapped our head towards Kanika. I suddenly felt my stomach turning in knot and fear came the best to me just the thought of her suiciding haunting me like hell.

"No!! May be its look like but its not a suicide case. They way she hurted herself its clearly shows that she was fighting with her mental case as if something was disturbing her and breaking her emotionally. She got a panic attack. She tried to hurt herself physically so that she can fight over her mental stress and spritual pain. She was trying to distract her spiritual pain. I am not sure but her state and her beat showing this only until you won't confirm this. Did she really go through something which hurted her badly.??" He asked and we all look thoughtful about doctor words.

"Ok!!is she ever get panic attacks before??" He asked when he didn't get any response from us.

"Yes!!actually  4 and 5 years before. When she was doing her graduation."abhi informed him and I straightened my body in attention

"Reason??" Doc asked.

"Actually..she she.."he stuttered, he was looking hesitant to spell it out.

"Tell me clearly so that I can help"doc asked cajoling him.

"She actually.. when she mole..molested by her professor in college."abhi stated hesitantly and we all gasped in shock and I averted my eyes to lying pale but still a beauty. I can't believe she really gone through that. I clenched my jaw and fist in anger feeling murderous. I just wanted to hunt  down that bastard and beat him to death.

"I am sorry but can you spill out in detail. I mean how she got panic attack and for how many days she was in trauma.??"doctor asked encouraging him for more.

"Actually.. yes!!Nandini had exactly same attack and she suffered from nightmares every night. So she was on pills atleast for a years."he informed him and I felt more hurt for her.

I never knew she suffered alot!!!

"Any other reasons or other suffering??"doc asked again being curious.

"No that's it. "-Abhi replied politely.

"Hmm!!ok..I will prescribed some depression pills because after panic attacks like this there are many chances of patient to slip into depression and inke past attack ko janne k baad lgta hai k actually ye tb b bhi depression ka shikar hui thi because major cause of nightmares is depression and fear of something and someone...ok I will take my leave from here and please try to keep her distract and happy."after advising doctor left from there.

And I standing there started to registered doctor and Abhi's each and every words. It clearly shows that Nandini hadn't a great past life I mean it was terrible and about her being molested by her professor it shows her hatred towards men but it will be more to hers fear than hatred. It means her hatred means something more and I am getting restless with curiosity whenever I tried to attach any string of her past together it worsening with more complications because little knowledge or whatever I heard from Abhi isn't enough to know or assume things about her past.

******
Abhi, cabir, navya, mukti and me. We all are sitting in living area drown in our thoughts waiting for Nandini to wake up.

"Abhi!! Can u please now tell us what it is with Nandini and her past. College time me b pucha tha to tune kuch ni bataya."cabir suddenly spoke with a curiosity laced voice.

"Guys!!I told you its not my place to tell you and mostly,she trust me about her past. I don't know usne mere alawa kisi k sath ye baatain share ki ho and most of it. Main uski life ka part tha."

"But please Abhi for her sake kuch to bata so we can heal her so we can take her out from her miseries??"I suggested pleadingly and Abhi left a,sarcastic chuckle and we frown in confusion.

"Heal her??gohd!!"he mocked sarcastically and we creased our brows,more in confusion "You know what its not easy to heal her. Agr kqbi koshish b karoge to you guys will back out one day."he stated seriously this time.

I don't know what he want to say but the thing is I want to heal her and for the first time  I am actually being hell serious about someone's personal life and specially a woman personal life.I don't care that I have no experience about a woman feeling but this time I want to because I don't know why I want her happy and safe. I can't express that feeling when I slept with her taking her in my embrace, I  have to most peaceful and carefree sleep for the first time in my life. I don't know why I felt those feelings but I am not going to deny it anymore that yes that was a wonderful and amazing feeling with a woman I have ever felt and I want to feel it even more. I don't know I just got addicted to her embrace just with a single taste. When I wake up next morning in jungle with a grin for the first time and after not feeling her anymore I felt worsened for the first time. Its like I became greedy of her in thst moment, I got restless with her absence and my widest morning gein turned into shrinkiest frown. My heart started to ache for her presence and my brain started to crave for her wonderful fragrance. I just wanted her in that moment nothing else but her . I doubt if some pixie or wizard came in front of me there and asked me if I want Nandini in return of my every wealth and luxury surviving without any penny,I must have said yes without any further delay and in thwt moment I realized she was my peace, my peace which I losted far ago and suddenly someone gave me a taste of it in from of Nandini. In that moment I decided.

I want her in my LIFE at any danm cost!!!!

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