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Chapter Forty-Four: "The House."

"I'M GOING TO be honest with you but I thought you would be getting the castle." I admitted to Sam.

It took a moment for him to answer. I didn't miss the way his eyes glanced at every part of the road, as if he needed to see everything in front of the empty street. But it was more than that. He didn't want to talk. He rarely did.

"Remember, that was inherited to my dad."

I nodded, glad that he had actually answered. Sam barely spoke for the past couple of days since the funeral. He had managed to go to classes, soccer exhibitions and they had just finished their last game yesterday. But even at his game, I noticed and Derek informed me that he didn't talk the entire time. And that sucked because soccer was a sport that made him happy. Sure he would be focused but he would be excited and chatty especially after a win like theirs. But after their win, he still didn't speak.

But today we were on our way to the property Charles had left for Sam in his will. I didn't ask Sam how he felt about it. When he found out, he was quiet, clearly thinking many things. It wasn't just the property that Charles had left for him, it was the money as well. He had given Sam the biggest percentage and this left some members of the family, particularly outside of the Cahill family I had known, irritated.

Greg was right. The second the will was mentioned and people got what they wanted, they left the castle. Some left Sam glares when he had left his room to speak to his father and mother about what to do, trying to take their advice.

I knew Vince and Sam talked about it but I didn't bring it up. So when Sam had told me that after classes today he was going to check it out, I was shocked when he asked if I would come along with him. I was shocked that he left the house to do anything these past days, especially going to classes and preparing for exams that was arising soon. And fast.

"Um...we're meeting your dad there?" I asked, removing my eyes from the multiple condensed looking houses of one neighborhood in Nottingham to look at Sam.  

"Yeah. He wanted to, um, tell me something. Apparently he knows the house and-and..." Sam trailed off and before I knew it, he pulled over to the side of the road without any warning. He slowed down to a stop by some nature reserve and I heard the honking of the car that had been behind us before it drove off.

"What-What are you-"

Sam heaved a long sigh, bury his face in his hands. "Hazel?"

"Yeah?" I asked quietly.

"I don't know I want to do with this house," He admitted. "I don't even know what to do with the money. There's-There's just so much of it being given to me and that's coming from me. I'm a kid that grew up rich and I'm saying that the money given to me is-it's a lot. It's too fucking much."

"Are you really surprised that you got this?" I had to inquire.

"In a way yeah," He said, leaning back, his eyes on the steering wheel as the sound of a car passing by filled our ears. "I didn't expect it. Everyone expected something. I expected something but not this. I-I remember him joking one day. I came home and I was complaining of the homework I had gotten and Beth told me that I was acting like," Sam paused and I heard a chuckle leave his mouth. "Like a baby and he said that one day he'll buy me an island where I wouldn't feel this stressed again."

"And in a way he got you an island."

"But plot twist: I'm still stressing out." He confessed.

I reached over to caress the top of his head. "You'll overcome it. You can overcome anything."

Sam let out another sigh, starting the car up again and driving. He looked solemn at the topic and spoke up. "Can we change the topic?"

"Your goal yesterday was sick." I said to add a little boost to his ego. And I was stating a fact. It really was.

Sam cracked a faint smile. "I had a feeling you were going to bring that up. But no talk about Cahill family or even football. Just something else. Please. Something that hasn't been stressing me."

I knew soccer was stressing him. In the midst of his grandfather's death, Sam still had to choose which trial he was going to this summer. In fact, he never brought it up before that date but as the weeks were getting closer to both trial dates, dates where he would be away for several weeks. I knew he was weighing his options.

"Maddy and Matteo?"

Sam leaned his head on his hand that was perched up on the side of the car. "Oh yeah. Have they said anything?"

"Nope. Maddy is silent about the topic of them and so is Matteo."

"Seriously? They kiss once and they don't even talk about it?"

"They didn't kiss once." I corrected.

Sam rolled his eyes. "You know what I mean. It's like, 'just get together'."

"Why are you so impatient about it?"

"Because if they wait too long, they could miss their chance," Sam said quickly before he took a breath to slow down his next words. "They could miss their chance of being together while what ever is going on between them last. Look at my dad, him and his dad fought their entire lives and they never solved their problems. Now his own dad is dead and he can't do anything about it."

And just when he wants to get away from the topic, he goes right back to it. Because whether he wanted to or not, he needed to talk about it. I hope he realizes that he needs to talk about it.

"He's going to meet us there right?" I asked.

"Yeah. I'm surprised he hasn't gone back to the house with everyone." The entire Cahill family had gone back but Vince stayed for the whole week, moving between Manchester to London for what he claimed to be only for business but it was more for Sam.

"You've spoken to him a lot this week, right?"

"Yeah, he calls. We met for therapy too. I feel like he's only been here to make sure I don't do anything."

I pause before asking my next question. "What makes you think that?"

"Because Peter is watching me like a hawk and Caleb is still at the flat. Caleb had a huge interview in New York but he cancelled. Because of me. As much as I'm grateful he's here, I don't want him to put his life on hold because of me."

"I know but they're only looking out for you because they care."

Sam didn't respond for a bit before he spoke again. "I'm just happy that mum didn't force me to go on those anti depressant pills again."

"What?" That caught my attention away from the vie from the window as we moved through a different neighborhood.

"When my sister died, I was on those pills for a while and, I hated them. I used to throw them in the toilet so no one would suspect that I wasn't taking them." His voice grew quiet and just at the mention of pills I'm suddenly brought back to around this time last year but I push it out of my head, not allowing myself to get completely and utterly worried about Sam.

He said he would be okay and I believed him.

I didn't get the chance to respond to that because suddenly we pulled up to a house and Sam took the key out of the ignition. "We're here."

The house was big. Definitely bigger than I had expected which was stupid because this was a Cahill property. The neighbors houses were a far enough distance but I could still see them from my view on the nice pathway. From where I was standing I could see how spacious the backyard was and I had a clear view of the nice blue pool and lounge chairs.

I was able to tell that this wasn't a stereotypical white picket fence house. Definitely not. There wa so much glass you would see the white furniture inside and the chandeliers. It was a Cahill house for sure just by the architecture and the way the flowers were lined up on the path to the door and the pattern of the path shone in the sunlight.

"This place is really nice." I said in awe.

Sam's eyes were still wandering and it was clear that he had never been here before. "Yeah it is." He breathed out. "He's here, c'mon."

Sam took my hand and we walked along the path and up the stairs to Vince Cahill who held keys in his hands. "Sam. Macy."

Sam didn't respond but I gave Vince a nod in acknowledgement. Vince held the keys towards Sam. "This is yours now."

"How come we didn't know about this house?" Sam questioned.

"I'll explain when we get inside."

Sam opened the front door with the keys and we all walked inside. Vince strolled through while Sam and I took everything in. The windows aligned made everything so much brighter and prettier. The walls were white but filled with no pictures or any artwork, the floor was carpeted and we all made sure to take off our shoes before continuing our trek further inside the house.

Sam and I followed Vince to what was most likely the living room where the windows were definitely bigger and I had a feeling that throwing one rock at this house would collapse the entire thing. But that didn't matter. It looked perfect to me.

Vince held a picture frame- what seemed like the only picture in this entire place, giving me the notion no one has lived here for a long time- in his hands and held it out towards us. Sam stared at the picture and I slowly took it from Vince grasp when Sam spoke. "You lived here? With mum?"

I glanced down at the photograph to see a younger version of Vince and Liz looking down at a baby that was playing with a toy on the carpet. I figured that baby was Toby.

"When your grandfather and I weren't talking and he threw me out of the house-"

Sam's eyes quickly met his father's. "He kicked you out?"

Vince nodded, his eyes on the picture. "Your mum and I moved here before you were born which is why you don't know about this place. Your grandfather had been building this place as a little vacation home when I was in my teens. It looked almost brand new because he had people work on this place for years, trying to improve it."

"Did you know that he was going to give this to me?"

Vince shook his head. "I didn't. No one did. I don't know about this nor did I know about the money. We had Toby in this city and we moved back to Bath when he was one."

"Grandfather let you come back to the house?" I didn't miss the pause in Sam's voice when he said grandfather.

"Your grandfather barely wanted to live in that house. Your grandmother had just died in the same house. Why would he want to stay? The longer he spent time there, he became more bitter. He lashed out at everyone. He didn't want to see his own children fall in love at that point when his own was gone. So he left and gave it to me in a sick way of his misery. Charles Cahill changed the day my mother died."

"That's the reason why he didn't want you with mum?"

Vince scoffed. "There were many reasons. Like one, I had been with a girl for two years before I was with your mother and my parents were dead set on me marrying that girl in the future."

"Why?"

"She had money. My family had money. Together: our families would have more money. And I did love her at that time not for the money but for herself. But it didn't last and I met Liz, your mum. And when I said I wanted to marry her and it was after my own mother died, he snapped. He didn't hate or even dislike your mother. He hated the idea of me being with her."

I heard Vince scoffed again as he muttered his next words. "If there is one thing we-us Cahills share in common, it's our pride."

"What about pride?" Sam said, his tone indicating that he was getting tired of this topic.

"Listen. We're stubborn. Tell me Macy, can he be stubborn?"

Sam and Vince's eyes both landed on me and I felt the intensity of both of their gazes. "He has his moments."

"We have the sense that we're right about everything and sometimes it takes a while for us to admit that we were wrong. And that pride of ours, the ego, that arrogance that we carry can-"

"It can ruin things, can't it?" Sam spat out. "Like grandfather never got to admit that what he did was wrong. That he should have just let you be happy. And you are happy with mum and us, the multiple kids you had. But he didn't want to admit that he made a mistake because of his pride. That's why, isn't it?"

"That's exactly why. And I admit that I made mistakes with my father but it's too late. He's gone. And there are some things I wish I could take back, words I wish I hadn't said to him."

There was a pause before Sam spoke up. "He was like my dad you know? When you didn't act like it towards me, he was there."

"I know, Samuel." Vince said and when his eyes went back down to the picture, he almost looked ashamed.

Sam pushed off the counter. "I'm going to look around more. Dad, i'll see- no I'll call you tonight."

Sam left without a word and Vince and I heard his footsteps as he made his way out of the room. I handed the picture back to Vince and shoved my hands into my pockets. "He told me about therapy."

Vince took a deep breath. "He'll continue going twice a week. He's going to hate it. Elizabeth used to force him out of his room the last times he had gone."

"Mr. Cahill?" I asked.

"Yes?"

"Do you miss him? Your father?"

Vince nodded, putting the photograph back in its place. "I will see you both when you return after exams. Goodbye Macy."

"Bye." And Vince Cahill left without another word.

I let my hands drift along the walls of the open house. I stared out the large backyard and pulled open the doors that led to the pool. When I was walking outside, bending down to let my hands dip inside the cool water, I heard Sam above, "Macy."

I turned around, looking up to see him leaning over the long balcony. "Whoa."

"This is attached to the master bedroom," He told me. "Come on."

I walked back inside the house, fiddling with my camera as I walked up the stairs to the nice hallway and moved through the house. I found Sam in the bedroom and it was furnished to the point where I felt like someone was actually living here right now. Sam glanced at me, his sock covered feet almost bouncing on the white carpet. The curtains were by the side, exposing the huge window that was letting in the sun into the white and black room. "Do you like it?"

I pointed for him to stand by the window and I took a picture. "Yeah, yeah I do. Do you?'

"Honestly? I love this." There was a sense of awe that went on his face almost as if he was dreaming. He grabbed my hand and pulled me along. "Check out this room."

He pulled us further down the hallway. "This could be a kids room. It's big enough to fit two beds but there's also two other rooms down there that I saw and one is big enough to be a guest room. Imagine Caleb comes over and ruins this place in the future-"

"That's not going to happen."

"Caleb would start a water balloon fight in any place if he could. Trust me." Sam pulled us down the stairs. "But the kids they could go up there and down on this floor, there's another bedroom and another room, we can check it out later. But..." He trailed off, opening a door and pulling me down yet another flight of stairs that led to a basement. He reached to turn on the lights despite the little windows that showcases the room enough but realized that the light didn't turn on with a flick but with a turn.

Sam turned the button slowly and I watched as the light got brighter but he turned it back so there would be a light dim across the room. "This could be where the kids could play."

He was really starting to think this through. "Sam."

"And look Soccer could be here and they could be with him and we can get another dog and I saw a football field on the way here and-"

"Sam." I stopped him with a hand over his heart, smile coming on my face. "Breathe a little first."

He let out a shaky laugh. "I'm sorry it's just...he knew me. He knew that I would like this place. He was of the people that knew me best. And I-"

Sam took my hand that was on his chest gently removed it getting quiet and avoiding my eyes. "And you what?" I urged him to respond but he took a step back quickly leaving the room.

"Sam." I tried to keep up with him but he moved swiftly up the stairs and back to the main floor of the house. He went through the living room, opening up the back door and made his way outside. I caught up to him at the edge of the pool, grabbing his hand. "Sam-"

"Just don't." He yanked his hand out of mine and although I felt a pang of hurt go through my chest, I tried to ignore it, understanding the reason he was acting like this.

"I know you don't mean that."

"Macy."

"You don't. Talk to me. I'm here."

"It's just-I'm trying to move forward-me talking about what we-not me-us-what we can do with this place is me trying to move forward but I want to talk about him. I want to but at the same time I want to forget because it's so much easier to go back to-to the stuff I did before."

"You mean-"

"Yes I mean what to think I mean. There's a part of me that wants to get so fucked up, I won't remember what happened. There's another part of me that wants to just drink but I\m not going to. And..."

"You want to have sex." I said for him.It was just sex, he wanted a distraction.

Sam let a sigh from his angry rant, looking at me with solemn eyes. "Yeah but you don't and I understand it."

I looked down. "A part of you is angry about that even though you don't want to admit it. Am I right?"

His silence answered everything for me. I sucked in a breath. "I'm not surprised."

"What?"

I looked at Sam. "I'm not. You went from being to have sex with girls before you met me and then you stopped. You used them as a distraction and you knew it was wrong. Caleb knew it too."

"What does Caleb have to do with this?"

"That night, on his birthday, Caleb talked to me. He was drunk out of his mind but he had the sensibility to let me know that us doesn't revolve around sex and I know you need a distraction and I don't how long it'll take because you can't get over something like this. You just have to cope. And I just want you to know that I'm here, Caleb's here, Peter's here, your family, your friends-we're all here for you because we know how much Charles meant to you, okay?"

Sam bit his lip and I watched him sit on the ground, burying his face in his hands. I took a seat next to him, watching him carefully. He let out a long moan. "I just miss him Hazel."

"I know you do."

Sam turned to look at me and for the first time in a long time I could see the tears threatening to fall from his eyes. I felt one fall from my own at the topic and the painful sight of him like this. Sam took in a shaky breath, sniffing once. "You can't prepare yourself for something like this. I knew one day his time would come but it was so unexpected especially since we saw him so soon before he-"

Sam took in a another deep breath to stop the tears from coming but when he realized that they wouldn't stop, he let out a frustrated laugh. "And now I'm finally crying. I fucking hate this."

I leaned over to hug him and Sam, almost child like, held onto me like his life depended on it and he cried into my sweater. And I could feel his heavy breaths and the slight shiver the omitted from his body, let me know he needed to cry. He needed to let out what he had been internally holding in. "I didn't want